


If I could.

by TaesKimono



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, But it takes a while, M/M, Main pairing is meanie, Past Jihan, Past Psychological Trauma, They work at a book publishing agency, This story might be what they call a slow burn, alcohol consumption, fluffy fluffs, frenemies to lovers, mild insomnia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2019-02-14 23:01:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 44
Words: 145,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13018014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaesKimono/pseuds/TaesKimono
Summary: Wonwoo hates buses, Mingyu offers him rides.Wonwoo hates moving, Mingyu runs errands for him.Wonwoo hates spending money, Mingyu buys him things.Wonwoo hates the miserable lunches he packs, Mingyu shares his with him.Wonwoo usually hates interacting with people, but for some odd reason he looks forward to seeing Mingyu every day.Wonwoo hates Mingyu, but he’s quickly running out of reasons to do so.He would’ve never guessed that the solution to all his problems, came in the form of 2 words, 3 syllables.Kim Mingyu.





	1. Chapter 1

An obscene series of cracks reverberated around him as he stretched his neck from side to side. He grimaced, not at the pain -or lack thereof- as it was a relatively common manoeuvre but rather at the sound. The horrible sound of bones crunching, and looming arthritis. Almost as if a metallic can was being crushed under foot right by his sensitive eardrums, except the noise was amplified by the lack of auditory interferences. It was a very quiet night indeed, he mused as he frowned up at the dark sky, he wondered if there were any stars hiding behind that thick blanket of city pollution.

Save for the loud internal thumping in his ears, belatedly warning him of an oncoming headache; the familiar road ahead was unusually silent and desolate. The cool wind felt chillier tonight as it penetrsted through his thin wrinkled dress shirt and the low-quality sodium vapour street lights did very little to illuminate the path ahead. This fact coupled with his terrible eyesight made it exceptionally more difficult for Wonwoo to remain calm.

It was definitely past midnight and well into the hours of the early morning, when he finally allowed himself to leave work for the night. Being a person who was inherently tired and generally weak for no obvious reason, was challenging in itself. So naturally, when such an individual is subjected to a 20-hour work shift, it only serves to further deplete his already limited energy reserves. Wonwoo thought that if it weren’t for the starving goldfish waiting to be fed at home he was sure he would’ve given up and collapsed in the dingy alleyway across the closed convenience store by now.

He paused at the intersection leading to the main road. His hindered senses and deprived brain somehow having enough rational thought, to check both sides of the deserted street before crossing to the other side. He stumbled on a miscalculated step, barely dodging the accumulated rubbish at the side of his favourite chicken joint -he swears he frequents because of the good chicken and proximity to work, rather than his chronic lack of funding, which means he can’t afford anything better.

He felt dilapidated in a way that he’d never experienced before. His aching body adding to the pain of his overall exhaustion, to the point where he felt ready to ignore the questionable stains and the pungent odour coming from that old mattress. The one that the bin men hadn’t gotten around to collecting, despite it being there by the corner of the shop for at least a few months now.

So understandably, for someone who was almost always tired this was a whole new level of unpleasant. The last time he remembered being in a remotely similar predicament, was during his final year exams at university. It was an overdose on liquid energy and ignoring the basic needs of his body, in favour of repeatedly drilling over-rehearsed material into his head, that had him barely functioning as a member of society for the next few months.

Not that Wonwoo was considered a functioning member of society even on his best days, anyway. But he had been hospitalised for over five weeks that time, due to extreme exhaustion and acute anaemia. Therefore, one would think it slightly concerning how that ordeal was considered “normal-ish” by Wonwoo’s standards, at least compared to what he was currently experiencing.

Although the young man was admittedly a self-proclaimed perfectionist, Wonwoo was by far not a workaholic. He always made sure he was out of the office at least five minutes before 6pm, every day, for the last two years since he began working. The only reasoning behind his later than usual departure tonight, would be an ill-fated mistake. Whereby the deadline of an important project was incorrectly believed to be the 4th of the following month as opposed to the current.

That being the following day.

If it weren’t for the keen eye of one of the staff and his unnecessary need to triple check everything, the whole mishap would have gone unnoticed and the company would’ve undoubtedly suffered big losses.

Thank god, they had that reliable, hardworking guy amongst them. Surely, he deserved some kind of raise or even a promotion for his selflessness and heroism. Instead he got stuck with an extra 7 or so hours of slave-working to get the project done in time for the CEO to finalise it in the morning. Curse his diligence and quick-thinking that apparently, did Wonwoo more harm than good. At least he learnt his lesson, vowing to keep it to himself the next time a co-worker decided to eff-up something important.

In the midst of his self-loathing, he thought he heard someone call his name in the distance. He dragged his heavy booted feet across the cracked pavement, his mind and body too worn-out from the day’s grievous labour to register the sound at first.

Silence immediately shrouded the dark street as soon as his footsteps halted on the concrete. Did he really hear his name being called or had his prolonged state of fatigue caused him to finally start hallucinating? He craned his stiff neck back briefly, scanning the dark, quiet road and the shadowed empty pavements. His blurry vision rendering any form of squinting futile as he could barely see a meter ahead of him without his glasses.

He cursed under his breath, remembering that the cursed round spectacles in question, were currently chilling inside his leather backpack. The boy had discarded them earlier, when they amplified the pressure on his temples, making his budding headache worse-r than he was prepared to handle.

Wonwoo looked ahead and picked up his pace towards the neon lights of the nearby bus stop when he felt his neck protesting the strain. Concluding for the sake of his mental stability, that he did not in fact hear anyone call for him at this ungodly hour of the night.

Although he really wouldn’t put it past his exhausted brain to play tricks on him. Like it was doing currently when he noticed the blinding headlights of an approaching bus that was so conveniently headed in the direction of Wonwoo’s neighbourhood.

He scoffed despite the pain. As if, he was that lucky.

He mentally gawked at the unbelievable scene that his desperate brain conjured up from his position on the bench. Everything from the sounds of the tyres crunching to a stop by the shelter and the creaking of the sliding doors, to the tired smile on the old bus driver’s face. It was all so realistic that he was momentarily rendered paralysed, his numb body lifeless and his soulless eyes transfixed in shock at the power of his hallucination.

So powerful in fact, that Wonwoo refused to be convinced by it. He was an avid believer in the presence of a dormant force stronger than any hallucination. A force that was capable of controlling the mind and keeping his thoughts firmly rooted in reality. He liked to think that he was in touch with it, that I was the one which saved him from missing the last bus for another two hours. That, or he simply didn’t care whether he was hallucinating or not, if it meant that he’d be on his way home already.

He ascended the steps, beeped his card and lowered himself on the very back seat of the aged bus, then he finally exhaled a long sigh. The bus was real.

Substantial relief flooded him at that single thought, but no amount of relief would suffice to rid him of the unfathomable pain, tension and stress that the poor boy was subjected to in the last 24 hours. He caught a glimpse of his carcass-like appearance in the window’s reflection as the bus jerked into motion, a half-hearted chuckle escaping his chapped lips at his over-dramatic thoughts.

At least it’ll be over soon.

 

 

 

According to Wonwoo life was a synonym for pain and suffering and the latter two wouldn’t end, until the former seized to exist.

This was a fact that Wonwoo already had ingrained in him, which would explain his ability to take all the BS as it came, while simultaneously remaining nonchalant about it all.

With that being said, it was still terribly annoying when his weak body would be so overcome by such crippling pain that he’d rather sell his soul to Satan to end the torment, rather than even attempt to think about getting better. In hindsight, he should’ve known something was up when his physical pain roused him from his admittedly long slumber at a quarter past noon. He remembers nearly choking on six -or was it seven?- painkiller pills as he swallowed them dry, since the kitchen was too damn far and the pain in his head way too much for him to think clearly at all.

He must’ve fallen asleep or become unconscious sometime after that, as it was now half past nine at night. At least according to the blurry figures on his cracked iPhone screen which was running dangerously low on energy, much like its’ owner. He typed out a quick message -something along the lines of SOS, he wasn’t too sure- to his ex-roommate and thereby ex-best friend; before he gave up to the enticing prospect of a painless trip to the dark abyss of unconsciousness.

 

 

Wonwoo was floating -not flying, because obviously humans couldn’t fly- in a cotton candy world. He was surrounded by goofy-looking smiley mermaids in pastel colours, a whole band of twerking mini-Pikachus, plus what appeared to be an entire years’ worth of harvest in carrots. They were incessantly rocking their heads, all while a particularly shiny diamond read them a poem about the meaning of life.

Wonwoo was smiling, he was feeling soft and unreasonably happy. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew none of this was ok, yet at the same time he couldn’t help but let himself slip deeper into the lucid dream.

Twenty-four years was enough time for Wonwoo to get used to being pushed around and rudely manhandled by this cruel, insignificant thing called life. So, he was hardly surprised when he was yet again, forced to peel his eyes open and face reality, even though he specifically remembered having no desire to wake up anytime soon.

He strained to keep his eyes shut and groaned loudly, immediately entering a frenzied coughing fit as he choked on his severely parched throat. Naturally his fight or flight instincts kicked in, his eyes flying wide open and back shooting straight out of bed, as he struggled to breathe in between all the heaving.

A more life-threatening concern however, was the small hand continuously hitting his back. No doubt the owner harboured good intentions but Wonwoo swore he could feel things breaking with every smack delivered to his sore back. The impact of the blows was definitely much larger than the size of the hand and Wonwoo had half a mind to give up on life already -they clearly didn’t get along well.

That is, until his hero and saviour came in the form of a twinkling glass, pressing coolly against his extremely chapped lips. The glass was half-filled with clear odourless liquid, that was slowly tilting its way out of the glass to carve a trail of life down his throat. The liquid raced down to calm his constricting chest, until it finally hit his empty stomach -which he could feel expanding with every gulp he took.

He closed his eyes and fell back down on the bed, savouring the sweet taste on his freshly watered tongue -how is it that he’s never noticed this taste before. He felt like every drop of water was injecting much needed life into him, allowing him to finally realise the unfamiliarity of the whole situation.

For starters, the bed he was currently occupying felt rather foreign, he was also somehow aware that glasses of water didn’t just materialise out of thin air to save a dying Wonwoo -no matter how cool that sounded. But the most unnerving realisation by far was the feeling of being watched and not just by one pair of eyes, but multiple.

Wonwoo was positively shitting himself -or he would’ve been if his insides weren’t as dry as the Sahara Desert. It was a well-known fact that Wonwoo didn’t get along well with humans and consequently lacked severely in the “friend” department.

Therefore, he was completely convinced that it had to be Satan, finally claiming him as his spawn. Just as Wonwoo prepared to initiate himself into the devil way of life, he heard him speak -the devil, that is.

He immediately furrowed his eyebrows, straining to hear the hushed whispers. Wonwoo internally gasped, taken aback by how human-like the voice sounded -having expected Satan to sound a tad bit more “satanic” somehow. He was especially put off by the nagging feeling at the corner of his being, telling him that he’d heard this voice before.

‘Do you think he’s dead?’

Thud. 

‘OW... what was that for, you dingus’

A second voice, sounding noticeably more tired and irritated than the first answered,

‘I swear I’ll kill you if you don’t stop asking stupid questions’

‘I can’t help it, he looks so dead’

The thudding sound came again -three times in a row- followed by pained groans. 

Wonwoo wondered what the literal hell was happening -and also why both voices sounded so familiar, wasn’t he supposed to be with Satan right now?

‘Kwon Soonyoung, istg’

There was an exasperated sigh followed by another “thud” and a hushed,

‘OWWW stop hitting me, Jihoon’

‘Then learn to shut your useless mouth, dingus. Can’t you see Wonwoo’s practically on his deathbed? You need to stay positive for him, not say such depressing things’

Wonwoo willed himself to fall back asleep and never wake up. The level of second hand embarrassment he received was so severe that wanting to die suddenly became his number one wish -up a whole rank from where it had always been a close second response to everything that Wonwoo encountered in life.

‘Guys you literally just saw him gulp down the entire glass like a thirsty whore, I’m sure he’s more likely to die of the embarrassment that you two are his friends than anything else right now’

Wonwoo unintentionally snorted, as the previously bickering pair sported identical affronted tones of denial, simultaneously yelling,

‘HEY, YOU. SHUT UP.’ at the owner of the third voice, who giggled quietly in reaction.

Wonwoo cracked one eye open to spy discreetly at his company. He had already gathered from their disturbing conversation that he was in hospital and was probably unconscious for a while. He didn’t even find it slightly alarming how calm he was despite this revelation. He was used to it, after all.

‘Oh, looks like sleeping beauty is finally ready to join the living. Hey Won, how ya feelin?’

Looks like his “discreet” one eye tactic wasn’t as discreet as he had hoped,

‘Um... g-good?’ He stuttered, clearing his still dry throat before adding ‘water.’

There was a series of clashes and thumps to his left, he could imagine someone had fallen down as they rushed to bring him water.

The boy with the fluffy pink hair shook his head at them with a light smile that warmed Wonwoo’s cold heart. Jeonghan was such an angelic person that Wonwoo couldn’t help but smile back.

‘They’re such a pair of dickwads. Aren’t they?’

Everything that came out of his mouth however, was the exact opposite of angelic. Wonwoo would have been surprised if he hadn’t already been well accustomed to the living contradiction named Yoon Jeonghan, since the beginning of high school. Wonwoo cleared his throat again, choosing to ignore the older boy’s question in favour of asking his own,

‘How long have I been here?’

His voice sounded croaky and uneven due to the disuse -not that he used it very often anyway.

‘Unconscious, you mean?’

Wonwoo nodded,

‘Unfortunately, not as long as last time.’

The younger frowned,

‘Unfortunately? What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘It’s nothing personal. Just that I can’t use my unconscious friend as an excuse to get out of shit anymore’ he said with a sweet smile, voice pleasant, as if he was telling a bedtime story.

Wonwoo scowled deeply,

‘Fuck off, Jeonghan.’

‘Woah, calm down bitchface. I save you from almost certainly coughing your lungs out and this is the “thank you” I get?’

Wonwoo relentlessly glared at him in silence until the older boy got the message loud and clear. He’d always loved communicating without the actual communication. He smiled to himself as Jeonghan stormed off muttering something along the lines of,

‘The disrespect. Tsk, Kids are so ungrateful these days’

 

 

 

The rest of the day went by in a blur. After Wonwoo was checked up by the doctor and attached to a new IV drip, he was finally given his water -two whole glasses this time- as Soonyoung fussed over him, asking how he was feeling every five seconds. Literally all his sentences ended with a “oh my gosh WONWOO, are you okay?” Or “holy shit, your chest just moved when you breathed, should I call the doctor?”.

Wonwoo just rolled his eyes, tuning the other’s blabbering out and sharing an amused look with a grumpy Woozi -which was his default setting so Wonwoo didn’t worry much about it. The shorter boy hadn’t said anything since his short greeting of ‘you good, bro?’ earlier, but it was very obvious to Wonwoo that he was just as concerned for his health as Soonyoung was. They just had different ways of showing it. While Soonyoung chose to blab non-stop, ask questions and wail. Woozi chose to watch, support and observe silently. It was easy to tell which reaction Wonwoo preferred.

He only finally felt like he could relax once the door slid shut behind them. He truly appreciated and loved his friends, 17 years of quality friendship wasn’t just for shits and giggles. He’d been through so much with these boys, cried together, laughed together, got shitfaced drinking together, helped each other make it through the long nightmarish years of high school. They’ve been there for each other through thick and thin and as much as Wonwoo complained about how annoying they were, he wouldn’t replace them for the world.

 

 

 

The following morning, he awoke to a sweet floral scent that instantly comforted him and a reassuring hand holding his own. It warmed his heart to know that his parents travelled from their hometown in Changwon -three whole hours away- to see him when they could’ve simply called in. He smiled significantly more in that day than he did the entirety of last year and realised he should go back home to see them more often.

After another few days of recharging he was finally discharged from the hospital and advised to follow a very specific and complicated diet to “replenish his body” which Wonwoo quite frankly, didn’t care for. He didn’t have the time nor the patience to figure out what half the ingredients were, let alone actually buy and make something edible out of them.

He had instant ramen that night. But at least he ate the dried vegetables that came with it, instead of abandoning them at the bottom of the pot, like he usually did. That was progress enough for him.

His apartment smelt like spring flowers and his fridge was stocked with an array of side dishes. He sent his mum a throbbing heart emoji text and fell right into soft crispy sheets with a content smile.

 

 

 

The following incidents were an incredibly rare occurrence. 

Wonwoo was in a good mood from the moment he opened his eyes the following Monday. And by “good mood”, it meant that wanting to die was firmly secured in third place, the lowest it’s been since he could remember. He hummed along to the beat of some throwback song as he went about his routine, even going as far as eating an apple for breakfast.

After little deliberation, he opted to wear a freshly ironed egg-blue dress shirt, tucked into his only pair of black slacks that actually fit, along with a tie. He could almost feel Soonyoung’s spirit gasping in disbelief -a part of Wonwoo couldn’t believe it either. He hadn’t been this eager to go into work since his first day at the god forsaken hell-hole.

The tie he wore wasn’t anything fancy, just a plain black clip-on one that his younger brother got him for his 17th birthday. But it was noticeably much fancier than his usual attire. At least he redeemed himself by forgoing the blazer and throwing on his favourite huge black parka before heading off to work a whole 10-minutes before he was supposed to leave his apartment. Gosh, was he eager.

But it’d been a full month since he last went to work and he ached to get a semblance of normalcy back into his life. Not to mention his desperate need of cash, before his landlord renders him homeless. Wonwoo would normally jump at the chance to hibernate forever, but lying in a hospital bed for as long as he did certainly wasn’t something he wanted to experience again. Ever.


	2. Chapter 2

There was something very unusual about the quietness of the cubicles and the people in them as soon as Wonwoo stepped foot onto the 3rd floor of Pledis Inc. at exactly 08:00am.

Not that it was usually particularly loud, it just felt different somehow. There was a distinct lack of familiarity, almost as though he’d stepped onto the wrong floor. Then again, a lot can change in a month so he took a deep breath and confidently strode towards his cubicle.

His heart dropped. There was someone at his desk.

Right there, the cubicle by the window on the second last row had been his space since he first began working here over two years ago. Wonwoo felt his stomach sinking -he’d been replaced.

The job-stealer must’ve felt the Wonwoo-sized statue behind him, because his handsome features softly rearranged into an endearing smile and he stood up in all his tanned glory to greet Wonwoo, his sunshine smile not faltering.

Wonwoo was freaking out on the inside, his face remaining passive on the outside. He mustn’t show weakness, because not only did this guy steal his job but also his title as the tallest in Pledis Inc. Wonwoo was super attached to that. Not to mention how unfairly handsome he was -not that Wonwoo would ever admit that, obviously.

‘Who the hell are you and what are you doing in my seat?’

He didn’t have the patience for small talk, he also really didn’t appreciate having to look up at him. He felt like he was losing whatever this was and Wonwoo hated losing.

The stranger’s smile faltered for a tense second until he reinforced it with blinding brightness and spoke in a calm chirpy tone that held no sign of hostility.

‘I’m Kim Mingyu...’

The stranger -or rather Mingyu- appeared to be in deep thought for all of two seconds until he carried on in a sure voice,

‘Sorry, but I think you’re mistaken, this has been my seat for the past month.’

Wonwoo could only look on in mild shock at this kid’s audacity, was he seriously going to act like he didn’t steal Wonwoo’s place. Kid had guts, he’ll give him that. He would’ve also given him a piece of his mind if it weren’t for the excited voice of his co-worker interrupting him.

‘Oh my gosh hyung, I thought I heard your aura. Welcome back!’ Vernon pat him firmly on the shoulder and continued smiling, despite the deathly glare Wonwoo was currently fixing him with.

‘Bossman was actually thinking of asking about you just now, hyung. I think you should probably go see him before he does, you know how impatient he gets.’

Wonwoo knew Vernon was a strange –borderline creepy- guy, but it irked him to the point of utter confusion each time he interacted with the American boy. Such a weirdo, he thought as he made his way to the CEO’s office. Because Vernon might be a weirdo but he was also usually right.

‘Wonwoo! I was just thinking of calling you.’ The slim blonde-haired man elegantly rose from his leather seat, circling the modern glass desk while fixing his immaculate suit -no doubt worth more than Wonwoo’s yearly salary.

‘It’s good to have you back. Although I wasn’t really expecting to see you so soon.’

He continued with a soft smile, leaning on the desk with his arms crossed as he motioned for Wonwoo to take a seat on one of the sleek armchairs positioned in front of the desk.

On the outside, Wonwoo remained expressionless while he fought a mental battle to restrain himself from spitting out the sarcastic remark that was currently on the tip of his tongue. How was seeing someone after a whole month of absence, “so soon”. He wondered why his boss was so strange and friendly, it made it harder for Wonwoo to filter through his words properly.

‘Ah, I see. Is that why you gave my position to someone else?’

Wonwoo grimaced internally, he swears he didn’t mean for his question to sound this confrontational. He hoped his boss wouldn’t be offended by his tone, he could easily be out of a job if he wasn’t careful.

‘Well yes, I did give the position to one of the top candidates during the previous recruitment process. Which you unfortunately couldn’t attend.’

Well that went smoother than he’d anticipated. No apology though, which Wonwoo found odd. He was sure he deserved one, but his boss straight up admitted that he gave Wonwoo’s position away. The position that he’d worked hard for during the majority of his first year, he’d only recently gotten used to the promotion and was really starting to deliver and now, just like that, it’s all over.

‘Actually, I was hoping to brief you on the situation before your return. As you know, I wasn’t expecting to see you today’

‘You can brief me now... i-if you have the time, of course’

Wonwoo blurted the request without much prior thought, immediately regretting how pushy he sounded. He hoped Mr Hong would tolerate his poor choice of words, he seemed like a nice guy.

His boss looked deep in thought, probably calculating whether he can indeed spare some time to inform Wonwoo of the change to his position. He liked to think of it as a “Change” of position rather than believing that he’d been “relieved” of his position, as the latter implied he’d be out of a job whilst the former hinted at the possibility of moving to an even higher position.

Not to toot his own horn but he knew for a fact that he wasn’t fired, since that was an outrageous thought. Wonwoo knew his worth and recognised that he was one of the top employees at Pledis Inc. there was simply no way he’d be let go of, unless his boss was stupid. Which he clearly wasn’t since it took some degree of intelligence to keep a company of this size afloat.

‘This shouldn’t take too long, Wonwoo. It’s rather simple, actually.’

He circled back around the desk and elegantly sat with his legs crossed on the leather chair,

‘I needed someone reliable to manage the editorial team, since as you know Mr Kang went into early retirement.’

Wonwoo did not know, but he wisely opted to withhold that fact.

‘Naturally, I began searching within the company before looking elsewhere. To give our current employees the opportunity to exceed and prosper, of course.’

He paused, took a sip of some clear liquid -probably wine, since no one in their right mind would drink water out of a wine glass, surely.

He wasn’t sure why his boss’ claim sounded the way it did, almost like an excuse.

Wonwoo felt slightly creeped out when Mr Hong began to stare him down, as if silently sizing him up. To see if he lived up to his standards, Wonwoo wasn’t entirely too sure why this was happening but he felt attacked.

He never fared well under such scrutiny. For reasons he didn’t quite fathom, the excessive attention made him feel like he was guilty of some heinous crime and was being cross-examined ruthlessly for the truth.

Then, a single curt nod from a head of blonde hair.

Relief flooded his entire being at the simple gesture. He was still as clueless as ever but somehow it felt like Mr Hong saw potential in him.

Wonwoo thanked his lucky stars and his deceased goldfish for guiding him through this mess of an interview or whatever it was. He clearly must’ve demonstrated that he was trustworthy at some point but he had no idea when or how he did it.

He bolted from the main office the moment he was dismissed. He couldn’t believe his luck. How had Jeon Wonwoo managed that, he’d entered as a meagre common nameless employee and exited as a senior editorial manager. That was like, an insane amount of levels that he just skipped through. He made a mental note to build a shrine to honour his late goldfish, this was undoubtedly his doing. Always looking out for Wonwoo, even from beyond the grave.

Wonwoo was eternally grateful -or maybe it was the hunger messing with his head. He recalled only having eaten a pot of ramen yesterday and an apple for breakfast this morning in the last 37 hours since his discharge from the hospital. That couldn’t be good.

 

 

 

His new contract was ready by noon the very next day, exactly as his boss had said. He was currently sitting in his local library breathing in the comforting scent of old books mingled with bad body odour and strong coffee.

He was completely focused and in his element as he scrolled trough the contract, scanning over every little detail -including the fine print. He did this repeatedly for the next hour or so, just because it never hurt to be extra careful and was delighted to find that his new position didn’t entail anything too daunting. Aside from maybe the annoying part about finishing at 8pm instead of the usual 6pm, but he could certainly overlook that. Especially if he was getting paid more for it, he somehow never managed to make it past the “broke student” stage in life and desperately wanted to finally feel financially stable.

His heart hammered against his rib cage as he scrolled back up to the section titled “salaries and wages”, the section that he’d religiously avoided until now. His eyes almost popped out of his skull at the force of his shock, his jackhammering heart stuttered to a stop and splattered his insides red, his anxiously tapping fingers froze on the mouse. The cursor hovering innocently over a number that had at least 4 zeros too many to be remotely reasonable.

He was having an excisional crisis, intensifying the longer he looked at the figures. It was simply ludicrous and Wonwoo refused to believe. How could it be that he’d be making almost six times what he currently earns.

After a short phone call to Mr Hong’s secretary, it became clear to Wonwoo that his boss was absolutely nuts. Who in their right mind would be willing to actually pay that kind of money to someone whose job was simultaneously their hobby.

Granted, Mr Hong probably didn’t know Wonwoo was a slave to anything related to books, he’d basically be getting paid to read books all day. It was simply too good to be true and Wonwoo hoped that for once in his life things turned out just as simple as they seemed.

 

 

 

Apparently, Mr Hong -or Joshua, as he insisted on being called after Wonwoo’s continually awkward bows and stutters of “sir”- wasn’t that much older than Wonwoo, barely six months in fact. He was also surprised to learn that Jeonghan was well-acquainted with his boss. Which in hindsight, shouldn’t have come across as much of a surprise since Yoon Jeonghan knew practically everyone and their grandma. It turns out they were childhood besties, lost touch and coincidentally met again as adults many years later.

From what Wonwoo hears they were very quick to re-kindle years of lost friendship and apparently, even shared a brief moment in time when they became a little bit more. But they’d decided to end it as soon as it started; seeing as they were more comfortable being just friends. Wonwoo didn’t particularly appreciate the image of his boss with one of his closest friends nor did he ask for the horrific details of their short relationship, but it was entirely unavoidable.

Wonwoo was not by any means an avid gossiper, in fact, he often disliked the useless interest people took in others’ lives. It made his skin crawl with ants to know that people spoke about him in the way his limited number of friends spoke of the people they knew. It didn’t help that 99% of all gossip wasn’t even true, just a bunch of rumours and misinterpreted hearsays that were so far detached from the truth, to the point where they caused harm to the one’s they related to.

With that being said, he couldn’t deny what a useful tool it was in the rare instances when the rumours floating around the office were actually true. They allowed him to gain so much miscellaneous knowledge as well as learn about the private lives of some of his co-workers. Like the time he heard that Kim Taehyung from advertising impregnated Jeon Jiwoo from customer services in the disabled bathroom; which he thought ludicrous at first.

Only to find himself slightly intrigued, when three weeks later a fresh rumour was in circulation, claiming that Jiwoo had mysteriously taken an indefinite leave from work and that Taehyung recently posted a picture of tiny socks on his Instagram with the mysterious caption “soon”.

It was simply unbelievable how interested his co-workers were in the whole situation, when it clearly didn’t concern them. I mean they were here to work for goodness sake, didn’t they see the pile of book drafts they had to sift through. It didn’t occur to Wonwoo who was deep into the current sci-fi draft that he was going through; that most people found reading books less of a joy and more of a dull chore.

He acknowledged them with a brief scowl when they got too carried away with their gossiping. A simple glare in passing would be enough to set the rumours to rest. Getting the employees back to working like frenzied prey hiding from the harsh eyes of their predator.

Wonwoo never really planned to become one of the most fiercely feared seniors in Pledis Inc., but it was clear that it happened anyway. The way everyone bowed too deeply and scurried away to work whenever he emerged from his office, made that much pretty obvious.

Prior to beginning work in his new position, he had hoped that he’d be staying in the sanctuary of his office reading books the whole day, while the rest of the regular editorial staff did their part without disturbing his peace. Clearly, he’d been asking for too much since he was interrupted on average, at least four times every hour for silly little things.

He’d be lost in the wonder of a new world created with the artful way that a skilled author used their words, when a rude knock on his closed office door would slap him back into reality. And for something as silly as signing some document or checking over revised paperwork or things that were generally less important than his reading.

Sometimes the other employees would offer him lunch or ask if he wanted a cup of coffee. Although, those requests died down after the first week of his blatant rejections. Other times it’d be a team meeting to discuss strategies or a confused co-worker unsure of what to do in a certain task. Wonwoo’s face however, would be the same stony expression, regardless of who it was and what they wanted. Not to be mean or anything, he just didn’t enjoy being interrupted.

Still, he tried to appreciate the useless tattles from time to time, it was a sort of respite from the long hours he spent hunched over a book in his new office. As he stood up stretching his arms way over his head and hearing the satisfying cracks from his back and neck, he decided to go on a little walk for a breath of fresh air and to also stretch his cramping legs.

His stiff shoulders and straining back reminded him of his father, whom had always said that too much of something good can be just as bad for you. It’s a shame Wonwoo always remembered wise sayings after the damage had already been done. He put on his dark maroon winter coat over his black dress shirt and grabbed his grey scarf before making his way out of the office. Passing by isles of suspiciously quiet employees, when he could certainly hear their quiet murmurs through his closed door just moments prior. He decided to pay them no mind, since they seemed to be working now anyway.

He glanced in the elevator’s mirror as he walked in, noticing the prominent bags under his eyes which were now more of a permanent fixture to his face rather than a transitional one. Overall, he concluded that he didn’t look too bad. By far not the sickly half-dead corpse that he usually resembled this time on a Friday. After fixing a few stray brown strands back into his messy side part, he leaned back in the corner of the moving metallic box, tuning out the world in favour of staring blankly at the lack of messages on his cracked Iphone screen.

 

 

 

 

‘Wow, Unbeleebubble. Really?’ asked a disbelieving voice, the shrill tone seeping into the cracks of his sluggish daydream.

‘I knoooow right! -I was like “Senior manager, already?”, I can’t believe it. Can you?’

Another male voice replied, although both voices sounded ridiculously high-pitched and far too excitable for Wonwoo to be completely sure about their genders. It looked like he’d stumbled upon yet another one of those unavoidable gossip sessions, the least he could do now was act like he wasn’t interested.

‘Absolutely not. Didn’t he start working like only a few months ago?’

‘YEAH. That’s it, it’s too soon for that kind of promotion, right?’

The first voice –number one, Wonwoo decided to call him- sounded incredibly excited at the prospect of sharing his thoughts.

‘UNBELEEBUBBLE…’

‘THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING. But get this…’

Wonwoo unintentionally leaned closer as number one’s voice lowered inconspicuously, this was the juicy part.

‘Apparently, he has ties with the big boss. I heard he specifically begged him to work here.’

‘NoOo… UNBELEEBUBBLE.’ number two gasped sounding affronted, but number one wasn’t done yet,

‘YES. From what I hear he’s a top recent graduate from Harvard’s business school and was already being scouted by other top agencies before he oh-so-suddenly started working here, suspicious right?

‘UNBELEEBUB-’

‘STOP SAYING THAT, DK. But listen that’s not all… I heard he stole Jeon Wonwoo’s position.’

Silence.

Wonwoo felt like he’d been splashed with a bucket of ice cold water, his head whipped up so fast that he grimaced at the whiplash. He really didn’t expect for his name to pop-up here, and for that, he was absolutely stunned. He felt like he had an idea who they were referring to and couldn’t help but scowl at the thought of that -tall, tanned, sexy Adonis with the smile that could heal cancer patients- lanky idiot who stole his job and had the audacity to deny it.

‘Really? Jeon Wonwoo? like THE Jeon Wonwoo -like senior editorial manager Jeon Wonwoo?’

Judging by the disbelieving tone of number two’s voice, Wonwoo assumed he wasn’t the only shell-shocked occupant on this elevator.

‘Yes, yes, yes. Can you believe? I can’t believe.’

‘UNBELEEBUBBLE.’

‘Like I think I’d legit shit myself if I was in the editorial team. I heard those poor souls aren’t even allowed to breathe too much for fear of irritating him and losing their job.’ 

Wonwoo really tried to look uninterested. Except that he kind of was –interested, that is. The pair sounded offended, angry almost and Wonwoo couldn’t help himself. The saying “bad company ruins good morals” has never been truer to Wonwoo than it was in that moment, it seemed like he’d picked up the bad habit of the other staff. But he hasn’t heard anything good lately and he was just so curious to know why people he’d never met before were scared of him,

‘What are you talking about?’ his deep voice cut through his throat before he could make his words sound less aggressive and more polite.

The boys must’ve not noticed Wonwoo wallowing in his emo-ness in the corner as they bowed deeply, looking absolutely terrified. Apparently Wonwoo’s “reputation” as a scary guy preceded him. He was sure he’d never met them before, yet they seemed to know exactly who he was and were already horrified by his unexpected presence.

He sighed, they flinched, he gave them a deadpan look. He had meant for the look to mean “are you serious? I’m not scary, like at all” but it seemed as if to them the look translated into something sinister and fear-inducing.

‘S-sorry sir, we weren’t talking about you, I promise.’

Number one stuttered at the same time that DK blurted out,

‘I promise it was just Seungkwan talking shit about you, Mr Jeon, Sir. I swear.’

The two glanced at each other before looking down at their feet, grim expressions painting their faces,

‘Who do you answer to?’ he asked, already tired of this interaction and regretting his impulsive decision to butt into their gossiping.

‘Junhui, Sir. Are we in trouble?’

Of course, it would be him. That happy go-lucky pompous being named Wen Junhui. He wasn’t surprised that Seungkwan and DK gossiped so much when their boss was basically renowned for his non-stop talking and his never-ending supply of energy and bad jokes.

‘You will be, if you don’t get back to work. And instead of uselessly talking crap about other people and their achievements, you should focus on getting there yourselves. Got it?’

‘YES SIR.’ Both boys simultaneously chanted looking completely ridiculous –was he really that scary- before they bolted out of the elevator as it came to a stop on the first floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyoooo wa-dup wa-dup!
> 
> An update. FUN!!!  
> Umm I love meanie & I have a lot more planned for this fic, prolly gonna be a long one tbh.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	3. Chapter 3

There was a spring in his step, despite the harsh winter weather. It was a clear Tuesday afternoon and according to the forecast it was very likely to snow sometime today, the first snow of this winter.

There was something eerily beautiful about the silent deadliness of this season, the snow like a blanket of innocence concealing the destruction beneath. Giving the illusion of peace in its flawless beauty, much like how makeup covered and concealed facial imperfections.

Seeing the never-ending stretches of pure untouched snow had this heart-warming effect on him; despite the icy climate. It reminded him of his fairly simple childhood, his little brother and his parents. He did often feel their heightened absence during the coldest of days, the severe drop in temperature reminding him of the warmth that only close loved ones could provide.

It had been too long since he last went back to his hometown, the phone calls to his parents getting rarer and more sparse the longer he stayed away. Usually he didn’t even have the chance to miss them, with most of his time invested into his work and trying to keep up with the busy life he chose to lead in the big city.

But when the silent winter created a false sense of calm over the land and the frigid winter air caressed his frostbitten cheeks, he realised just how much he missed the simplicity of his childhood.

It was nothing too fancy from what he recalled nor was it particularly memorable in any way. His father was a police officer and his mother was a kindergarten teacher. He went to school in the morning, watched from a safe distance as other kids played with their friends in the afternoon, had dinner with his family in the evening and occasionally fought with his brother over the last slice of pizza. One would say it was a pretty average childhood, boring in its normalcy and lack of drama.

Despite all that, Wonwoo vividly recalled being happy, having discovered an effective way to combat the monotony of his daily life through the vibrant, elaborate worlds portrayed in the books he read. He found in them an escape, the chance to be what he wanted to be, the freedom to imagine himself in a magical world full of drama and spontaneity. His father had noticed Wonwoo’s odd attachment and love for books and bought him one for every little occasion, he even remembered having his own mini library in his bedroom.

He smiled reminiscent of how his childhood hobby had led him to where he is today, a top editor for a top book publishing agency.

 

 

 

Snow.

Snow was beautiful. Snow was also –at this very moment- as it seems falling from the clouds above.

Wonwoo couldn’t believe it, he stood stock still and watched as a single snowflake elegantly danced its way through the cold air to land delicately in his outstretched palm. It seemed that for once, the weather forecast wasn’t trolling everyone.

He couldn’t wait for it to settle so he could subtly make snow angles and force Jihoon to join his team, as he challenges Soonyoung to a snowball fight; all while pretending to hate the universe.

He continued on his way to a quaint family-owned restaurant, where he was instructed by the said pair to have lunch today. It’s been so long since he ate outside, often settling for a homemade sandwich in his office.

Because eating alone was weird and he hated how people looked at him as if he were a disease, whenever he went out to eat by himself. He also didn’t want to eat with people, because that would involve socializing and Wonwoo was that one awkward guy who’d rather not do that.

He spotted the pair through the glass windows and could tell they were already bickering even before he entered the shop. He wondered how they managed to live together when they were like this, but to each their own.

‘WONWOO. MY HOMIE, MY MAN, MY BESTIE. I’VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH.’

Soonyoung clasped tightly on Wonwoo’s freezing fingers and greeted him with the enthusiasm of a damsel, finally reunited with her soldier husband who’d just returned from war.

He scowled, wrenching his fingers free from Soonyoung’s grasp and nodding to Jihoon’s simple greeting of ‘sup’ instead, before taking a seat opposite the pair.

‘As your bestie, I took it upon myself to order for you. Your fAaAavourite. Aren’t I just the sweetest?’

Wonwoo cringed at the volume, he’d forgotten how loud his friend could be, especially after a day of quiet office work. He shrugged, deciding that he was okay with that since that hopefully meant that Soonyoung would also be paying for the said meal,

‘What did you order?’

‘Only the best of the best for the best of the bes-’

Jihoon not-so-gently slapped his hand across Soonyoung’s face, ending his passionate monologue,

‘He got you spaghetti.’ Was Jihoon’s short, apathetic answer.

Wonwoo grunted at that, completely unimpressed because, ‘Soon, that’s YOUR favourite, not mine… but I will reconsider the decision to revoke your best friend title if you pay for it.’

Soonyoung looked positively affronted, ‘WoOoOow, Wonwoo. I’m I- You’re the worst you know that… FINE, I’ll pay for your stupid spaghetti, you imp of satan.’

The redhead crossed his arms over his chest and glared at the floor with a ridiculous pout on his face.

Jihoon must’ve found the exchange hilarious as he snorted, before fist bumping Wonwoo and managing a ‘this is why we’re friends’ between his contagious laughs.

The rest of their date went by faster than he would’ve liked, he found that he was enjoying the company way more than he anticipated. The continuous laughter and endless banter making his heavily stressed and homesick heart feel lighter. The spaghetti also went down a treat, but that probably had less to do with the flavour and more to do with the fact that it was a free meal –those always tasted better for some reason.

He sent the still bickering pair off with tears and hugs from Soonyoung and a curt ‘see ya.’ from Jihoon, before he strolled back to the office.

Uncharacteristic smile stretching his lips taut, he felt light with the way his belly hummed in satisfaction at the warmth of being filled. Something about chilling with his friends after a while filled him with a sense of home and belonging –that he didn’t even know he needed, until he got.

The snow was still falling, floating so beautifully around him that he felt the sudden urge to break out into a Disney song. But he refrained for fear of further breaking his anti-happiness persona.

He smiled even more at the warmth that enveloped him once he entered the building, appreciating the way it melted the ice in his bones as he sauntered onto the 6th floor editorial wing where his even warmer office awaited him.

He didn’t realise how his out-of-character behaviour was coming across to the rest of the staff. His humming paused and his unrelenting smile twitched at the corners as he took in the shell-shocked expressions of his underlings -they looked like they’d seen a ghost, and frankly, Wonwoo was offended.

‘Mr Jeon, are you feeling alright?’

‘Peachy.’

He spat with a scowl, causing Chan -the poor intern- to flinch away from him. He felt bad about spooking the kid, but Wonwoo had a hard time filtering his reactions when he felt so wronged. Was there a crime in being happy? Did he like NOT have the right to smile, if he wanted to?

Granted, all he ever did was scowl and bark clipped orders at them, but that’s because they were always slacking and not because Wonwoo woke up with the resolve to be mean that day. That still didn’t give them the right to look so horrified, it made Wonwoo feel like he’d been a nasty, cold-hearted person.

‘Get back to work. All of you. I want the finalised versions of the dawn series on my desk before 5pm, so get to it.’

It was as if a switch had been flipped on, with the way everyone instantly tried to look like they’d been busy working this whole time. He didn’t intentionally choose the strict approach when dealing with his staff, but it seemed to work and it got the job done. It also worked a right treat in repelling the visitors to his office that were after useless small talk, thereby diminishing the number of times he had to speak. Wonwoo was happy with just that.

He was humming quietly to himself, his foot bouncing to the rhythm of a silent tune as he started flipping through a file. He was sure it wasn’t there when he went out for lunch -it must’ve been deposited in his absence.

He choked on air when he read the name signed at the bottom of the document,

“Head of marketing and sales, Kim Mingyu.”

His eyes felt about ready to fall right out of their sockets, so the rumour was true, after all. That good looki- No. Mingyu was the head of marketing and sales now. 

‘Wooow...’ he let himself fall back against his wheel-y desk chair as he shook his head, disbelief colouring his tone.

It was only last Friday that he’d told off the gossiping pair on the elevator and he chose to forget about the whole thing. Since even the mere thought of Mingyu -who was, mind you, pretty much a complete stranger- evoked within him the strongest of irrational emotions and reactions.

It was so bad that he’d want to storm up to his innocently grinning perfect face and punch him directly on his unfairly straight nose, and then fix him up while showering him with hugs and affection. Even just randomly hearing the other’s name in passing made him want to bust his pretty pink lips open and then kiss him better.

He wasn’t too sure why he was having such strong reactions to the kid, let alone why his thoughts insisted on being violent to him, then being nice. It was confusing, even to Wonwoo -who was the one having those thoughts.

But apparently, Soonyoung had it all figured out.

According to his lively best friend, the signs and symptoms were pretty obvious and the diagnosis relatively easy to make.

Now, Wonwoo didn’t think he was one to run away from his feelings, sure he found Mingyu physically attractive -but who wouldn’t. He was sure that even if he were blind, that silky, honey-like voice alone would be enough for him to feel attracted to the taller boy.

However, Wonwoo also had a certain degree of arguably misplaced disdain towards him for stealing his job -among other things like being taller than him. So he found Soonyoung’s conclusion ridiculous and laughed uncontrollably in his face when the shorter boy suggested that he liked Mingyu.

Him? liking Mingyu?

He chuckled quietly, still shaking his head as he signed the document off and resumed his reading from the morning.

It was an absurd idea, Wonwoo had liked others before. Like his first girlfriend in middle school before he realised he was into dudes. There was also that shy kid from his biology class in high school and the overly loud one from his school’s baseball team. There was also his first serious boyfriend from university whom he’d been with for over two years -before the mother feather cheated on him- but that was beside the point.

The point was, those were people that Wonwoo liked. I mean logically, would he date them if he didn’t like them? No.

So naturally he tried comparing the “like” that he felt with his exes to the “like” that Soonyoung claimed he had for Mingyu, which was in Soonyoung’s words “more obvious than a shining 17 carat diamond”.

Nothing. None, no comparison there. After sifting through all the data he had on what it felt like to “like” someone, he decided to just give-up. Especially since it was yielding no similarities to anything he knew or read about. One silly horoscope website even suggested he was falling in love.

He snorted, closing the tab just as a timid knock sounded at his office door. It was Chan, and the kid still looked scared as he couldn’t seem to face Wonwoo straight in the eye.

‘What is it, intern?’

Wonwoo sighed, leaning back against his chair as he considered apologising to the poor boy.

‘The books you asked for are ready for you, sir...’

Wonwoo was surprised at the kid’s ability to keep his tone somewhat stable, when he was clearly distraught. But he was even more surprised that they actually got the job done a whole 30 minutes earlier than the deadline he’d set. Turns out being strict wasn’t as bad as he originally thought.

‘M-mr Jeon, sir.’

Oh. He didn’t realise Chan was still here,

‘Yes, Chan?’

‘Someone from the marketing team was asking about a file...’

He went on in an unsure tone, so Wonwoo wordlessly handed him the file and told him to get back to work.

 

 

He lay in bed that night and the few nights after that wondering why he was so good at being effortlessly mean, while the thought of smiling and chitchatting with his co-workers seemed like a chore.

Come to think of it, Wonwoo was never one to jump at the chance to small talk or allow himself to be engaged in any type of silly conversation. It certainly explained why the number of people he could call “friends” was laughably small.

But he just wanted to prove -somehow- that he wasn’t being mean on purpose, he just preferred his solitude to most things. He even sent e-mails to his superiors rather than attend the meetings because he felt more comfortable communicating without the verbal part of it. It wasn’t necessary anyway, since he always clearly stated whatever needed to be said and addressed any issues that required his attention through those regular e-mails.

Apparently, Joshua -his boss- thought it necessary that Wonwoo attend the next senior staff meeting. The older payed him a visit in his office on Wednesday evening and made it very clear that Wonwoo was to be present -or else.

Wonwoo didn’t really think there was an “or else” since his boss seemed like such a sweet person. But then again, he was friends with Jeonghan so he couldn’t be too sure about that. The point of the matter was, Wonwoo felt it, the un-verbalised threat and promise of something dark if he were to skip out on this meeting.

So he thought it wise to not aggravate his boss, and actually go for once.

 

 

 

Friday rolled around with surprising speed, catching Wonwoo completely off-guard. Literally. He was running late for that god-forsaken meeting.

He’d been enjoying a cheeseburger with Soonyoung at a nearby Burger King, when his cursed iPhone beeped at him. Irritated and angry at being disturbed, he took out the phone only to let it drop right on his half-eaten cheeseburger as he read the tittle of the alarm.

Oh, why the hell did he even set it on time as opposed to 10 minutes earlier like he did with all his other rare meetings.

He rushed out of the restaurant, leaving behind a bewildered Soonyoung, a greasy cracked iPhone and a half-eaten cheeseburger. He prides himself in being able to run as fast as he could -even though he knew, that later his lack of stamina would come back to punch him in the guts, but at least he would be less late to the meeting if he ran.

He stopped by his office, throwing off his coat and grabbing the necessary file as he bolted towards the stairs -no time to waste, waiting around for an elevator, right.

As he took the stairs two at a time to reach the top of the 7th floor, he decided to take a minute to lean against the cold wall in an attempt to regulate his breathing. The last thing he wanted to do was storm in there, dishevelled and sweaty as he was, all while heaving like he was in the middle of an asthma attack.

After he deemed his breathing sufficiently calm enough, he opened the door to the large conference hall that he’d only been in once before.

That’s when he felt them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idek anymore, I'm just gonna roll with it.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	4. Chapter 4

Eyes.

Lots of them. Scrutinising eyes, judging eyes, questioning eyes, amused eyes, intrigued eyes and generally confused eyes.

Wonwoo didn’t blame the last of the eyes, since they were just probably wondering why this unfamiliar guy was crashing their meeting. But he only communicated through e-mail and hardly left his office so that was understandable.

Still, he couldn’t help but feel increasingly uncomfortable at all the unwanted attention, should he greet them or just sit down. Or would that be too rude, yeah, he should definitely greet first. But Joshua had other plans as he intercepted Wonwoo’s greeting with a pleasant voice and a soft smile.

‘Wonwoo, what a surprise! I was sure you were gonna be a no-show’

Wonwoo bowed his head slightly and muttered a weak ‘surprise’ with a grimace that was initially meant to be a smile.

‘That’s great. Here, take a seat. we were just getting some introductions out of the way, since we have a new senior staff member joining us today. Why don’t you both introduce yourselves, now that you’ve decided to join us’

Wow, he really wanted to punch the guy for putting the spotlight on him again. Didn’t he realise how much Wonwoo was hating this. Thankfully another voice spoke up so he was saved the horror of going first.

A chair to his left swivelled back gently as its occupant stood up to introduce himself,

‘Hi everyone, pleasure to meet you all. I’m Kim Mingyu, the newly appointed head of the marketing and sales team. I look forward to working with you and I hope we can all get along.’

Dammit, of course that kid would be here too. How embarrassing, he couldn’t bring himself to look in that direction as the other sat back down. Eventually the applause died down and Wonwoo had the undivided attention of the room again. Oh god, how was he supposed to beat that friendly, energetic tone and sweet, confident voice.

He bit the bullet and sprung-up -a bit too aggressively- out of his seat, clearing his throat as he made eye contact with several of the senior staff,

‘Good afternoon. I’m the senior editorial manager, Jeon Wonwoo. Pleasure to finally meet you all, I’ll make an effort to attend more of these meetings in the future and apologies for the tardiness, I had an urgent matter that required my immediate attention.’

Wonwoo might have forgotten to breathe as he hardly paused throughout his speech, he just hoped they got the message since he really didn’t feel like repeating himself.

The applause ensued after a beat of tense silence and Wonwoo finally relaxed into his chair while Joshua began talking again, redirecting all the attention away from Wonwoo. He breathed and reminded himself to not look left, as he only half listened to what was being said.

‘And Wonwoo, is there anything you’d like to add to that?’ The devil incarnate AKA Junhui spoke up, dragging him uselessly into the conversation.

‘Yes, you’ve been awfully quiet today. Wonwoo here is always coming up with some great ideas, I’m sure you could share some with us’

He couldn’t possibly say he had no idea what he was required to share his thoughts on, when his boss was asking him directly like this.

‘Well, I thiiink that-’ he paused, looking around and while he was, he unintentionally looked to the left where Mingyu’s tanned index finger was annoyingly tapping the third line of the open document.

Was he, by any chance doing Wonwoo a solid and helping him out. Well, there was only one way to find out.

So he read from the line Mingyu was pointing to, adding his own twist to the words to make them sound like they were his own. He wasn’t a senior editor for nothing.

‘Oh that’s a really interesting point, actually. Similar to what Mingyu mentioned earlier but more logically thought out, I like that. Well done, Wonwoo, keep it coming’

Save to say, that Wonwoo did not “keep it coming”, departing as quickly as he’d arrived when Joshua concluded the meeting. Deeming it a success and expressing his desire to keep up the productivity -while looking directly at Wonwoo.

 

One look at his reflection in the bathroom mirror was enough to confirm that he looked just as exhausted as he felt. He did normally look like he was dying on Fridays anyway. A long week of hard work and having to deal with irritating situations -involving other humans- kind of did that to him.

Examining the deep set of his eye bags he noticed that they were alarmingly beginning to turn darker, resembling bruises. He scowled deeper, fluffing his hair so that the strands would fall over his eyes, to at least try and conceal them.

He considered taking the rest of the day off as he trudged back down to his office. Feeling royally drained of energy, he knew from experience to take a break and rest when he was feeling this way. The idea of being hospitalised for another month was really not appealing to him.

He strode confidently towards his office, ignoring the silent editorial staff as he barged into his office, with the intention of grabbing his coat and leaving for the day.

He wasn’t prepared at all for the visual that greeted him next.

Kim Mingyu was leaning against HIS desk in HIS office while smiling suspiciously down at a piece of paper. His heart stuttered for a second, during which he was filled to the brim with a warm tingly sensation at seeing the other smile. Which was absurd, so logically Wonwoo HAD to end that nonsense.

‘What do you want?’

Mingyu jumped up slightly, hand to his chest as if he was scared or something. Was it because he was caught in the act or because of the sharp tone of Wonwoo’s voice -the latter didn’t know.

The taller boy was no longer smiling and Wonwoo couldn’t explain the sudden ache in his rib cage. His cute smile was replaced by an even cuter pout. Again, Wonwoo’s heart did that funny thing where it freaked out and made his insides fuzzy. Wonwoo couldn’t explain this reaction even if he was being held at gun-point. He just felt weird.

The other’s sultry gaze took on a pleading expression, making him look -almost- like a puppy. How adorable.

‘You’d think I deserve a “thank you” or something after helping you out at the meeting. But apparently you don’t share that sentiment.’

He pushed himself off the desk, a familiar looking black file in his hand, which he gave to Wonwoo before sidestepping him to the door.

Shit. He must’ve forgotten to grab it in his rush to escape the conference hall. Now, he just felt crappy. Surely, he’d be a terrible human being if he let the other leave without a thank you, or at least an apology of some sort.

He locked his loud heart in a dark corner of his chest and summoned the courage to blurt a ‘wait.’ Just before the other boy left him feeling guilty and broken.

Wonwoo turned on the spot to face him, taking a step back when he realised that he was uncomfortably close to the other -close enough to count his thick lashes and notice the little mole on his left cheek, which added to his already too-hot hotness. He took a deep breath and began talking immediately, once he knew he had the other’s attention.

‘Thank you for helping me out at the meeting, it’s very much appreciated and also for bringing this file back, thank you. Oh, and sorry for you know, my rudeness earlier. I don’t mean to be, I just get cranky when I’m tired’

He rattled off the long list before finally having the balls to look the other in the eyes. He really wanted to convey the sincerity in his tone, he refused to be the bad guy in anyone’s books -especially if he could help it.

The shorter was surprised to see an amused, almost expectant look on Mingyu’s handsome face. He was glowing with a healthy tan despite having worked all day when Wonwoo was looking like an actual zombie, right now.

Wonwoo returned the other’s look with a puzzled expression,

‘And... is that all you’re sorry for?’

Wonwoo’s eyebrows furrowed further under his long bangs, his lips pursing as he thought hard. Was he missing something? Has he wronged Mr hottie over here before?

‘So you don’t remember how you accused me of stealing your job in front of the entire 3rd floor?’

‘W-what?!...’

It was so unlike cool, composed Wonwoo to stutter but he was too tired and shocked to care.

‘I never said you stole my job, Mingyu. I only asked what you were doing in the seat, that was -as far as I knew- mine. So it was my right to question what a stranger was doing there’

Mingyu giggled -so cute- at his outburst, before leaning in. Wonwoo internally squealed as his senses were overrun by Mingyu’s nice smelling cologne. His warm breath tickled the sensitive skin on his neck. He wanted to simultaneously kill the tall idiot and kiss him till his lips fell off.

‘You know rumours travel really fast around here’

He whispered before leaning back and smiling like he didn’t just sexually harass Wonwoo,

‘So I knew that’s how you felt without you having to say it.’

Wonwoo scoffed, looking away to hide the heat rising to his cheeks,

‘So are you normally an idiot? or do you just go around believing all the random crap you hear?’

Mingyu had the audacity to bite his lip while he smiled -Yes, smiled- at the accusation. Why was he biting his lip, what the hell did that even mean?

‘Hyung, has anyone ever told you that you’re such a meanie?’

‘They say I’m scary and rude but I haven’t gotten that particular word yet. So no.’

‘Well hyung, I don’t think you’re scary, just a meanie. And to answer your question. No, I do not go around believing every single rumour... not until I verify the truthfulness first.’

‘How?’

‘Simple. I ask around.’

He shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

‘By the way, I cannot believe that you said that to Josh-hyung.’ He said after a tiny pause, followed by uncontrollable laughs.

‘Oh...’ came Wonwoo’s intelligent reply, he’d forgotten how confrontational he was that day in Joshua’s office.

But “Josh-hyung”? Why did it sound like the two knew each other? Almost as if confirming to him that the rumours about them “having ties” were true.

He grimaced at being found out, feeling guilty for accusing him of stealing his position, when all Mingyu did was take the job offered to him.

‘Ummm, sorry. I guess’

‘You guess? So you’re not even sure I deserve an apology when you made me out to be some kind of job-stealer. Wow, that’s harsh.’

For the way he spoke, Mingyu wasn’t really displaying any signs of being hurt over this, almost like he was having fun with it.

‘Sorry.’ Wonwoo looked away, sheepish, when the taller fixed him with an intense gaze that made his stupid heart leap with joy and excitement.

‘What are you sorry for, hyung? Tell me.’

Was it his imagination or did Mingyu’s voice suddenly drop an octave, Wonwoo paled at the feeling of hot blood rushing throughout his body -no doubt giving his ghostly cheeks an embarrassingly pink tint.

He kept his eyes fixed on the ground and prayed the other wouldn’t notice his blushing cheeks,

‘I’m sorry for making you out to be some kind of job-stealer, Mingyu. Forgive me.’

He apologised in true Wonwoo style, not only did he quote the younger to take the piss, but he also lathered his apology with a healthy dose of sarcasm.

‘Well, since you apologised so nicely, I will forgive you...’

He sighed in relief, not even sure why he was feeling the need to be relieved in the first place.

‘...But only if you join me for coffee on Monday.’

His neck cracked with how fast he looked up at him. He was just about to protest and maybe insult him a little, when Mingyu spoke before he could,

‘You’re not allowed to refuse either, so I AM seeing you for coffee on Monday. And by the way hyung, you should really take better care of yourself. You look like shit.’ He exclaimed before running off to god knows where.

What the hell was that about, he thought as he collapsed on his chair wondering what just happened to him and why his heart swelled with so much of that fuzzy feeling that he felt like it was flying away.

 

 

 

 

 

He groaned, lifting his heavy head and squinting in the darkness to locate the source of the shrill ringing that snatched the sleep away from him. It was his office phone, what the hell was that doing in his bedroom? -he gave himself no time to dwell on that question as he croaked an unintelligible greeting into the receiver.

‘FUCK YOU, JEON WONWOO. Trust your dumb ass to fall asleep at work again, WHAT THE FUCK!’

He flinched at the loudness, recognising Jeonghan’s worried tone almost immediately.

‘Hold on, ok. I’ll come get you. Jus- just stay there, Won’

Having barely just woken up, his mind was very hazy and he had no idea what just happened or if anything happened at all. But he did manage to realise that he was in his office, before he knocked out again.

He woke up to worried calls of his name and a gentle shake of his shoulders, it was Jeonghan.

‘Hyung, wha- why’re you here?’

His answer came in the form of a slap to the back of his head, where he could already feel an oncoming headache.

‘Ow.’ His hand darted to comfort his throbbing head as he sat up straight and glared at Jeonghan,

‘Ok, that was unnecessary.’

‘No it wasn’t, you idiot. Do you know how worried everyone was when you weren’t at home and we couldn’t reach you? Only for that other idiot Soonyoung to belatedly realise he had your phone all along. But it was literally 2am and you weren’t home yet, so I followed my motherly hunch and called your office.’ He paused to dramatically inhale,

‘Jeon Wonwoo, you are a fucking stupid piece of shit who doesn’t deserve to have such caring friends, I hope you know that.’

Wonwoo gaped at him, because one that was harsh and two that was a very strange way of telling someone you care.

‘Damn, no wonder why my neck hurts so much. I must’ve accidentally fallen asleep, huh.’ That’s strange, Wonwoo didn’t remember falling asleep though, he re-traced the events prior to this.

Coffee, and a whole load of confusion is what his hazy mind unhelpfully supplied. Apparently, that’s what he was thinking before he blacked out. He also thinks he answered the phone at one point but wasn’t too sure about that.

‘No shit, Sherlock. Feel stupid yet?’

‘Sure. Take me home now, I’m tired as fuck’

He stood up stretching the kinks and cramps out of his protesting body,

‘Watch your profanity, Wonwoo. Don’t make this harder than it has to be. Now get walking.’

‘Ok mum, sorry.’

He was surprised that he had the energy to joke as he sluggishly walked out of his office at 2:30am on a Saturday, only to collapse just as his backside made contact with the soft leather seat of Jeonghan’s car.

He was -yet again- shaken violently out of his slumber, blinking to clear his blurry vision as he heard Jeonghan restart the car.

That’s right, he remembers the older boy found him fast asleep in his office, proceeded to yell profanities at him and then insisted he drive him home.

‘We’re here... Make sure to drink water and go straight to bed, take painkillers if your head hurts too much, ok’

He nodded sleepily, removing his seatbelt -strange, he could’ve sworn he hadn’t put that on- but that could only mean… he turned to Jeonghan with a goofy smile.

‘The heck are you smiling at, dickface’

‘Nothing.’ He bit back the smile threatening to spread further and sobered up a bit.

‘Thank you, hyung. Really. For everything.’

‘Stop being such a sap and go sleep already.’

He might’ve fooled everyone into sounding annoyed but Wonwoo wasn’t anyone. He could hear how concerned Jeonghan was about him. The younger of the two appreciated the thoughtfulness, and chose to ignore the snarky comments.

He drank a full bottle of water before he knocked out cold on his mattress -which felt like heaven after sleeping on a solid desk for hours.

 

 

 

 

 

Waking up feeling like someone hit you across the head with a brick, was not pleasant. He rolled onto his back, groaning at the pain in his head. Praying for it to stop hurting, please.

Apparently, God didn’t care that Wonwoo didn’t want to be hospitalised again. He stared blankly at the white ceiling, as he waited for his awful vision to adjust.

Then, he Startled into a sitting position when he groped the nightstand for his cracked iPhone, only to come up with nothing. He fell back into his pillows when he remembered why his phone wasn’t on the nightstand -like it should be.

Memories of Burger King and Kwon Soonyoung instantly came to mind. He hoped the crappy piece of technology would survive, until he could get it off him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise, I cringed so hard writing this. Major cringe is also coming up in the next few chaps.
> 
> I feel like they only JUST met, after like 10k words of BS.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	5. Chapter 5

He’d always loved the feeling of his booted feet stomping down on the fresh fluffy whiteness, leaving a gaping hole where his foot had been. Now, Wonwoo wasn’t really a fan of freezing his fingers off, nor did he appreciate how red his cheeks and the tip of his nose got as a result of the sub-zero temperatures. But he just loved snow and it had settled over the weekend and was now ankle-deep, the weekend that he’d basically spent being dead to the world.

Thankfully, the killer headache from Friday had subsided without much in the form of side effects. So, he slept relatively calmly throughout Saturday, waking up intermittently to use the bathroom and stock up on water and quick meals.

At around 7pm that Saturday evening he knew he had to leave his apartment or he’d risk damaging his already fragile mentality. The sheer amount of boredom that hit him earlier that day was so ridiculous, that it was actually painful. He did try to combat the feeling though, by doing little things to keep himself occupied. He cleaned his apartment, ironed his shirts, watered the plants, took a bath, went through his work-related e-mails. By the time he was finished with all that, not only was he exhausted but he was still mind-numbingly bored.

Food presented itself to him as an effective tool to manage his boredom. So, he ordered Chinese and stuffed his face until he felt the uncomfortable stretch of his belly. Then he tried to find something interesting to watch on TV but sadly came up with nothing, so he re-watched Tokyo Ghoul on his laptop instead. 

Then crisis struck at around 7pm. His apartment was deathly in its silence but his mind was exceptionally loud. Full of dull, incoherent thoughts. Too many floating around for any of them to stand out, but none of them staying long enough for him to make sense of them. He felt like he was in solitary confinement, alone and detached from the real world –so this is what it felt like to not have a phone. He ached to have any form of connection with the outside world, to feel the wind on his face and fill his lungs with fresh air –although he couldn’t vouch for how clean city air was, he just wanted to feel alive.

He didn’t bother changing out of his pyjamas, putting on a warm coat, a beanie, his favourite scarf, a facemask and thick boots before braving the cold at 7:15pm on a Saturday.

It was still snowing outside, -although, it was more like a gentle dusting of snow rather than a blizzard- but he felt extremely cold regardless. The freezing temperatures mercilessly penetrating through his layers of clothing, until he could feel the chill right down to his bones.

He shivered, teeth almost clattering behind his mask as he pulled the beanie lower on his ears and the sleeves of his pyjama hoodie over his icy fingers. He was already regretting his decision to leave the heated shelter of his apartment –why was he not smart enough to call a taxi, at least that would’ve saved him the 20-minute trek to Soonyoung and Jihoon’s place.

But he wasn’t smart enough to think of that when it mattered and he was already halfway there, so there was no use crying over spilled milk. And anyways, he really hated the smell of the tasteless cow’s body fluid.

The looming structure of his friends’ apartment complex came into view, the road leading up to it devoid of any movement. Since everyone was clearly smarter than Wonwoo and chose to stay in their warm homes. The building was much nicer than his, and on the more affluent side of the neighbourhood. The only reason Jihoon could afford to live in such a place was because he was a genius music producer and had multiple hit songs that were constantly being played on the radio.

No one really found it surprising when his songs instantly shot up to the top of the charts upon being released, least of all Wonwoo. Not necessarily because he was expecting that to happen, but because he grew up alongside him for 17 years and had experienced his genius first hand. The grumpy kid was a prodigy from a young age, ridiculously talented and naturally gifted at everything. Wonwoo sometimes envied how quickly the other boy picked things up and excelled in everything, when he struggled in comparison.

He sighed in relief as he let himself into their apartment. Feeling like he’d entered heaven as he was immediately greeted by artificially heated bliss. Closing his eyes and taking a moment to indulge himself in the warmth, he heard a clank, followed by a blood-curdling scream.

He opened his eyes to complain about the unnecessary noise but he was hit over the head with something sturdy and wooden before he could get his sentiment out.

 

 

‘Ow, careful.’

Wonwoo complained, when he felt too much pressure on his head wound.

‘Stay still, you’re moving too much’

Came Jihoon’s nonchalant reply, as he increased the pressure some more.

‘Stop, it hurts’

‘Because it’s supposed to, you idiot’

Wonwoo couldn’t tell whether Jihoon was a sadist who enjoyed causing him pain or whether he was genuinely trying to help.

‘No, it’s cuz you’re doing it too hard’

‘Fine, bitch. Do it yourself, then.’

He threw the ice pack right at his wounded head and flung himself on the sofa, as if he were the one in pain and not the other way around.

‘MY HEAD.’ Wonwoo lamented, addressing no one in particular, 

‘My guitar’s busted, but you don’t see me complaining’ the shorter still felt the need to retort sharply.

‘You literally attacked me with it for no reason’ he defended.

‘Uhh actually, for very good reason. Your face was all covered, you looked like a fucking serial killer’

Jihoon tried to justify his naturally violent behaviour. Sure, it must’ve been near impossible to recognise him with the items he had on, but no sane person would make the split-second decision to hit people over the head with a guitar. Serial killer or not, it took some inherent evil to do something like that.

Wonwoo snorted, holding the icepack to the blooming bruise on his forehead and falling into a comfortable silence.

‘Where’s Soonyoung?’ he asked after a pause, finally recalling the reason for his ill-fated visit.

‘Hmm. m’ not sure, said something about a dance workshop’ Jihoon must’ve actually dozed off on the sofa as he sleepily mumbled his answer.

‘Oh. Do you know what time he’ll be back?’ Maybe he could wait for him to come back so he could get his phone.

Jihoon sat cross-legged and shrugged his shoulders after a brief moment of thought.

‘Dunno, Don’t care. Why don’t you call and ask for yourself?’

‘Geez, you don’t have to be so mean. A-and I can’t do that, anyway’ Wonwoo sulked.

The short blonde looked very intrigued by Wonwoo’s crestfallen face as he leaned closer and whispered ‘Why?’

‘Cuz HE has my phone. And he’s not even here. And my head hurts. And you’re not even helping. And it’s so cold outside. An-And WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?’ Maybe living as Soonyoung’s best friend for 17 years wasn’t such a good thing after all, he was being so uncharacteristically dramatic and annoying –he hated himself.

Jihoon blinked at him and Wonwoo looked away feeling embarrassed in the aftermath of his outburst.

‘That was such a soonyoung thing to do, you know that?’ he chuckled as he grabbed his phone from under the cushions and dialled a number.

He let it ring for a few seconds, before putting it on loudspeaker and scooting closer to Wonwoo,

‘Your bitch is here, say hi bitch’

Jihoon greeted unenthusiastically into the phone,

‘OMG, WONWON. HI BITCH’

‘Hi.’

Wonwoo replied indifferently, not even bothered to complain about being referred to like that.

‘ARE YOU OKAY? YOU SOUND SUPER MESSED UP.’

‘I dunno. Maybe it has something to do with your violent roommate hitting me across the head with a guitar.’

‘HE DID WHAT NOW?! BOIII I SWEA- WHAT THE FUDGE IS WRONG WITH YOU JIHOON?’

‘I. am. NOT. Explaining myself to you, Soonyoung.’

The boy was almost shaking with restrained anger. Again. Wonwoo wondered how the hell they managed living together, when their interactions were so explosive.

Wonwoo delicately released the phone from Jihoon’s death grip and put it to his ear after switching the loudspeaker off,

‘Hey, so when are you coming back?’ he asked cutting off Soonyoung’s colourful string of curses directed at Jihoon –who was currently burning a hole in the coffee table with the intensity of his glare.

‘Awww, you mish me aweady?’

‘DON’T.’

‘Hehe, my train leaves at 8am on Monday so I should be in Seoul by noon-ish, why?’

Wonwoo’s heart sank to his stomach,

‘You mean you’re not even in Seoul, right now’

He didn’t have the energy to sound shocked so he carried on as calmly as possible,

‘Forget it. Just tell me where you put my phone.’

‘I have it right here with me, silly’ His idiot friend guffawed.

‘YOU WHAT? Soonyoung, whyyyyyyyyyyy?’

‘What do you mean why? To keep it safe, of course. Don’t worry you’ll get it back safe and sound on Monday.’

Wonwoo begged himself not to over-react. He took deep-breaths and calmly hung up the phone –there was no such thing as farewells between enemies. Wonwoo leaned back in his armchair and both boys simultaneously groaned.

‘He’s so annoying.’ Jihoon muttered woozily,

‘Yup.’ Wonwoo poped the “p”, he couldn’t help but agree.

‘So, what’re you gonna do, Won?’ The smaller boy asked after a lull in conversation,

‘I don’t even know, Jihoon. What AM I gonna do?’

He really didn’t want to have to go back home to his lonely apartment in this cold, without a phone –especially because he couldn’t think of a single thing to do to pass the time and this fact would only worsen if he went back.

‘I have an idea… How about you stop being a dramatic bitch and help me get some lyrics done’

Wonwoo gave him the stink-eye but accepted the notepad and pen that Jihoon offered him. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d co-written something with his friend and it made him feel exceptionally giddy when his name came up in the credits of those songs. In all honesty, he was beyond flattered that something he helped create was being appreciated by the masses –it made him feel a much-needed sense of validation.

putting on the earphones and pressing play, he closed his eyes and allowed the sweet melody and the soft beats to transport him to his happy place –where he’d hopefully find some lyrics that could do this incredible piece some justice.

They worked diligently throughout the night, knocking out in a huddle on the sofa at 4:43am after some remarkable progress with the song. There was something strangely rewarding about almost completing a song and having it sound even better than he could’ve imagined. Still, it didn’t change the fact that he was absolutely knackered by the end of their session.

 

 

 

 

He was flying first-class on his way to Hawaii, fully decked out in his cringe-y aloha shirt and straw hat. Feeling at peace with his soul while he sipped on his fruit cocktail. Humming -one of the songs that he helped Jihoon write- in his head.

Then the lights began to flicker dangerously and the plane shook uncontrollably, the pilot announcing that they were experiencing severe turbulence. Then they were falling. And Wonwoo was too young to die, so he began crying.

He woke up with a start, hair in wild disarray and heartbeat frantic. It was just a dream.

Running a hand through his greasy hair, he chuckled at his silly reaction. Looking up to see a fully dressed angry-looking Jihoon, who was rapidly tapping his foot with his arms crossed.

‘Are you literally gonna sleep around in my apartment all day?’ he questioned, tone irked.

‘Time’s it?’ Wonwoo answered with his own question.

‘2:53pm. You’ve been sleeping for like 10 hours straight, how are you not waking up yet?’

‘Well, I am now.’

‘Only because I shook you awake.’ He mumbled,

Wonwoo shot his friend a very judgemental look, realising that the turbulence in his dream only happened because Jihoon was shaking him violently in real life.

Jihoon offered him a confused glare and Wonwoo just shook his head at him.

After Jihoon effectively kicked him out of his apartment under the guise that he had a client coming over and didn’t want any distractions, he decided to leave and roam aimlessly inside the nearby shopping mall, instead.

It was one of the biggest malls in Seoul, spanning over 5 floors and housing almost every brand under the sun, designer, high street, even little boutiques and charity stores. They sold everything from clothing items to household items. There were craft shops, hardware stores, small eateries and big restaurants. Areas for kids to play while parents shopped, areas to just sit down and enjoy a book –if you could tolerate the noise level, so not Wonwoo.

Normally, Wonwoo didn’t go out without a plan, he wasn’t a spontaneous person –at least not in the way Soonyoung was -so he just stayed at home and found something interesting to do. In the rare instances when he found himself venturing far from home, he would usually stick to places with the least number of people.

So, he might visit the small coffee shop that he’d discovered during his freshman year of college, the sign was covered with thick foliage and the shop trapped in the basement under a lingerie store –it was understandable why most people avoided it. Since the only way to know about the coffee shop was to go in the lingerie store, and not many people were willing to risk their reputation for caffeine –especially since there were a few other coffee shops within walking distance.

Other times Wonwoo would visit random libraries, compare the books they had and spend the day trying to get to know the place. He’d walk around gauging whether he could see himself reading peacefully there or not. This is how he ended up going to almost every other library in the city, he remembers how these self-guided tours were his favourite thing to do in university. When others his age got drunk, had sex and did drugs, he was out in the city finding the next library to study at.

He would’ve loved to go around Seoul and revisit some of those places today, but the thick snow was not providing the of best conditions for walking. Which is how he ended up aimlessly roaming in a mammoth indoor shopping mall rather than trekking his way through ankle-deep snow with no real destination in mind.

He just didn’t want to go home, there was no goldfish to be fed anymore and that was the last of his excuses –the poor thing had been dead for a while before Wonwoo even noticed, assuming the animal was just too lazy to swim around. With no real responsibilities for him to attend to and no interesting books for him to read, there was no point in him going back this early.

He spotted the bookstore he used to work at while he was in university and decided to drop-in for a visit. The bookstore was located on the third floor, close to the escalators and sandwiched in-between a perfume boutique and a pet supplies shop –he remembers how he sometimes bought the goldfish food after a shift.

The bells above the door -that Wonwoo installed himself five years ago- jingled signalling his arrival, he stepped onto the welcome mat allowing the door to swing gently shut behind him. He sighed in content at the smell of books, it felt exactly the same as it did the last time he was here –almost two years ago.

He walked through the multiple isles between tall bookshelves filled to the brim with books of different colours, sizes and genres. Coming to a stop at the section labelled “Romantic Literature” he crouched down and browsed the tittles. He remembered how this section of the bookstore was his favourite -as a Korean Literature student- and he’d always be extra excited to check if there were any new arrivals so he could buy them before they ran out.

A tightly sealed novel hidden away in the back caught his attention “Thunder & Sound” was the tittle of the book and the cover depicted a dark background submerged in orange smoke with the silhouettes of two young boys walking towards the source of the smoke. What he found really intriguing was the back, a solid black colour devoid of anything else, the book had no description and Wonwoo was curious.

He continued browsing the rest of the sections with his book secured under his arm, smiling when he recalled the storyline of a book he had read previously for school or for his own entertainment. It was a bit like walking down memory lane, whenever he found a familiar book and recollected its storyline, this simultaneously brought back the memories from when he was reading the book. He remembered what he was wearing as he read, where he was and who he was with, he’d even recall his mood that day –whether he was stressed, upset or happy.

For such an emotionless person, books really did evoke in him a lot of feeling and thought –perhaps, it was part of the reason why they were so dear to him. He walked up to the counter, humming in satisfaction as he placed the book down waiting for the big-eyed youth to scan it and tell him the price –since the mysterious book had no price tag either.

Wonwoo was glad he no longer had to wear the moss-green employee shirt, it was hideous but this kid somehow pulled it off. He looked about 15 to Wonwoo but must be at least a few years older, quite pretty for a boy, he noticed. He wore his long black hair in a middle part which should look stupid, but on him it looked impeccable. His dewy light skin had a subtle olive glow to it, and his strong angular nose coupled with his small face made him seem almost like a foreigner. His eyes oddly resembled those of a deer with their size and innocently twinkling dark pupils. They were shinning as though they reflected the stars and Wonwoo found it super adorable.

He was offended that he was replaced by a good-looking person. Again. But at least it wasn’t that shocking because no-one could be more good-looking than that annoying idiot. It was just a physical impossibility.

‘That’ll be 11,000Won, Sir. Would you like to pay by cash or by card?’ his sweet nasally voice prompted Wonwoo to search for his wallet. But when both coat pockets came up with nothing, he realised he’d left it in his jeans which he didn’t wear since his pocket less pyjama bottoms were more comfortable. He gave the kid whose nametag read “Samuel” a sheepish smile,

‘Sorry, I forgot my wallet at home, can I come back tomorrow for this?’ he asked hopefully, watching as the kid nodded his head way more enthusiastically than he needed to.

‘Of course, Sir. Would you like me to keep it for you?’

‘Are you allowed to do that?’ Wonwoo knew it was against the bookstore’s rules to reserve items because it wouldn’t be fair for others who were ready to buy them immediately.

It was Samuel’s turn to look sheepish, he looked down biting his lip in deliberation. Wonwoo smiled, he was just so cute.

‘Actually, we’re not. But you’ve been looking at the books for over 2 hours so I trust you to come back for it tomorrow.’

Is that how long it’s been? He wouldn’t know since he was phoneless, but time usually did fly when he lost himself in books. Still he realised it must’ve been at least four hours since Jihoon kicked him out, that was enough time for the light to bleed out of the sky until the darkest of nights remained. Despite it not being that late at all, there were very few people out in the streets, so Wonwoo’s squelching footsteps in the snow felt louder than they actually were. His nose was runny and numb but he hoped that was just a reaction to the low temperature and not the beginning of a cold.

And it wasn’t, he concluded when he got to his freezing apartment. Because after the space warmed up significantly, the runny nose was gone and his body was feeling calm and relaxed. He’d heated up the leftover Chinese food from yesterday which satisfied his hunger and after doing some cleaning and taking a warm bath –with a mango and blueberry bath-bomb, he was feeling loved and content.

He went to bed that night, praying for Monday to come faster so he could kill Soonyoung, get his phone back and read some new novels. He was also secretly excited about the vague “coffee on Monday” thing with Mingyu, he didn’t know where they’d have the coffee –would they stay in the office or go somewhere else? Although the most persistent thought in his head was why someone like Mingyu -who probably had hundreds of people lined up for him- insisted on having coffee with HIM out of all people.

Especially since Wonwoo wasn’t even the nicest of people to him and set them up from the start as enemies. So why did Mingyu not seem to hate him? It made Wonwoo want to try harder to be as kind as the other was.

Sadly, not because it was the right thing to do, but because Wonwoo hated losing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have come back from the ded, I'm just wondering why all the people that comment are so super nice. Is it normal for people to be that nice, especially when my writing is crappy???
> 
> If you guys have an idea what might happen in this fic, feeeeeeel free to tell me, I'm curious.
> 
>  
> 
> ANYWAYZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	6. Chapter 6

Something was off.

Wonwoo couldn’t decide what, but he managed to narrow it down to two possible options. Expired milk and sweaty socks that have been incubated in a jar for at least a month or a dead rat in his office.

The smell was so absolutely terrible that his nostrils flared and his eyes watered at the intrusion.

After a quick visual inspection of the state his office was in, he concluded that the cleaners must’ve skipped it on Friday. But he couldn’t really blame them since he knew the reason. The cleaners only ever clean empty rooms, -such was the rule- meaning that if Wonwoo weren’t fast asleep in his office last Friday then it would’ve been cleaned.

This left him with the daunting task of finding what was causing the odour. He looked under bookshelves, in the corners behind the plants and even in his pen-cup, but he couldn’t locate the source of that nasty stench.

Now, it was almost 8:00am, he sighed as he looked at the time. He’d been doing this for the last 15 minutes and all he got were a nasty pair of matching stains on the knees of his slacks from all the crawling. The workday would be officially beginning soon and the first of the editorial staff were starting to arrive, which meant that he needed to figure something out now. So he decided to settle for opening a window and leaving his office door ajar, to promote better air circulation in the room.

As for his slacks, he chose not to look down at his knees, simple.

 

 

 

 

A few hours later, when the burning ball of light was almost right in the centre of the vast blue sky, a gentle breeze made its way silently through the open window. It swirled around Wonwoo carrying with it a fresh scent and a much cooler temperature. It tickled his sensitive neck and tousled the lightweight hairs on his head.

Wonwoo was distracted. He couldn’t focus on the reading anymore, he frowned.

Making his way over to the open window, where the playful breeze was gently flowing through, he pulled it shut without a second thought. However, his pale fingers faltered for a second, when he attempted to shut the blinds as well.

Wonwoo always had the blinds shut, shrouding his office in semi-darkness. He found that he preferred reading that way, the less of everything else meant that he could focus all his attention on the book in his palms and delve fully into its wondrous world.

As well as keeping all the blinds shut, there were a few other things he always did to maximise his focus. Like how he kept his office door shut to mute all the sounds that could possibly distract him.

Making sure the office smelt neutral and didn’t have an overpowering scent -be it good or bad was of paramount significance. Because smells were distracting to his sensitive nostrils, and a distracted Wonwoo was never able to do a good job.

So really, if he wanted to focus he would have to shut the blinds. But as he looked out, beyond the smudged glass he found it hard to take his eyes off of the beautiful scenery.

He could see the rooftops of hundreds of little houses, all different in their colours, shapes and sizes. Some looking new and more modern whereas others looked outdated and in need of upgrading.

The narrow alleyways -that resembled tiny blood vessels- were snaking their way up and down the hills and around the houses until they joined the main roads.

There, cars and other forms of road-traffic travelled at ridiculous speeds, everyone having a destination in mind and wasting no time to get there.

He couldn’t hear much of anything from the 6th floor, but he assumed there’d be a lot of noise down there.

Wonwoo picked up his head and looked beyond that, into the horizon where the sky met the tall constructions and skyscrapers in the distance. There was a flock of birds flying in a “v” formation, from this distance they looked utterly tiny, but Wonwoo was sure they were bigger than they seemed.

He caught sight of the neon red/white banding of the Namsan tower, as it sat on the mountains. It might have been one of the highest points in the city but it appeared no bigger than his finger from where he stood. He smiled at the comparison.

He remembered Jeonghan going there with his boyfriend last year. Wonwoo fell in love with the idea of taking someone else there as he heard all the stories. He’d listened intently to the older boy, proclaiming that he’d go there once he gets a boyfriend, just as soon as Jeonghan stopped talking.

The older boy laughed, in a loud, contagious way, then he looked at Wonwoo straight in the eye and said, “the day you get a boyfriend Jeon Wonwoo, is the day I join a Christian cult, get married and adopt 10 children”.

It was nice to see how much faith Jeonghan had in Wonwoo’s dating skills. Sure, he’d been single for over four years now and never put forth the effort to change that. But, he’ll tell you it’s because he’s waiting for the right time, not because he lacks the appropriate skills.

Thinking of Jeonghan and his infuriating words made it hard for Wonwoo to admire the tower’s architectural beauty. So he aggressively shut the blinds and glared at nothing.

He wouldn’t know how long he’d been doing it, or how he’d blocked out the world so perfectly, just glaring in silence. But he managed it somehow. And when he heard a tiny chuckle from behind him, he was too angry to be shocked by the sound.

And when he locked eyes with the person who emitted the sound, he couldn’t help but smile back, all the way to his eyes.

Normally when Wonwoo smiled, it stopped firmly at his cheeks, not going any further. The only time it did, was when he lost control over his face. It turns out though, that in front of a certain tall, tanned, puppy-like co-worker, Wonwoo lost control of more than just his face.

His dully beating heart, picked up the pace frantically as if trying to run away from Wonwoo’s chest and into the other’s arms. His body relaxed as if he were a frozen ice cream melting under the heat of the other’s bright smile.

Mingyu looked simply breath-taking with his hair down in waves over his forehead, the older only having seen him with his hair up before. He looked small and soft and like the young kid he was, for once.

The little light in the room was casting a golden hue over his tanned face, making it look good enough to eat. His warm brown eyes appeared almost hazel in this lighting and his set of perfectly white baby-vampire teeth were gleaming as their owner smiled with mirth in his crinkled eyes.

‘Morning, hyung. Sleep well?’ he greeted in a bubbly tone, with his blinding grin he effortlessly pushed himself away from Wonwoo’s desk and strolled confidently to the older.

‘Morning, and y-yeah I did.’ Wonwoo replied, sobering up at their close proximity and offering a small smile of his own.

Mingyu looked unreal this up-close and Wonwoo felt ready to combust with that burning gaze, hot face and lack of space. So he grabbed Mingyu by the forearm -taken aback at the feeling of muscled firmness under all the layers. Wow, he’ll admit that’s hot and quite unexpected.

For some reason Wonwoo had hoped that Mingyu would be some scrawny kid under his clothing, not wanting anymore reasons to feel attracted to him. But he couldn’t tell him that, so he’d have to act like he wasn’t secretly enjoying it.

There wasn’t much dragging happening though, the younger was -for the most part- willingly letting Wonwoo pull him along. Wonwoo must’ve thought he was putting in work to steer Mingyu but realised how utterly mistaken he was when the other suddenly stopped walking, just outside Wonwoo’s office.

‘Move, Mingyu. I thought you blackmailed me into coffee, let’s go.’

Mingyu gently detached his forearm from Wonwoo’s harsh grasp and walked back wordlessly into the office. Wonwoo looked at the alarmed faces of the editorial staff -probably having witnessed the miraculous event of Wonwoo spending time in his office with another human. He wondered how long Mingyu sat at his desk before he realised?

He glared at them, and they began working again. Although they sent him weary looks every now and again. Mingyu re-emerged from the half-open doorway which he’d disappeared into, with a familiar looking burgundy coat in hand and shut the office door behind him.

He stepped into Wonwoo’s personal bubble and draped the coat on the shorter boy, before he fixed the hairs in Wonwoo’s side-part, exposing more of his forehead and said ‘NOW, we can go’

Wonwoo’s hand flew to his forehead so quickly that he ended up slapping himself where Mingyu’s fingers had just been. His mouth was wide open and his eyes even wider, he didn’t know how to react, he needed time to process what just happened. So he said and did nothing.

Mingyu was still smiling when he removed the hand on Wonwoo’s forehead and pulled at the wrist. That broke whatever spell he was under and the older began to move.

Together, they walked towards the elevators, standing not quite shoulder-to-shoulder due to their height difference but close enough, that if both boys had their hands by their sides then they’d overlap in the middle. But Wonwoo kept his hand in a tight ball in his coat pocket so that didn’t happen.

They stepped onto the snowy pavements, although they were cleared for the most part -which Wonwoo was grateful for because he wasn’t wearing his good boots and these weren’t particularly meant for slippery conditions. The sun was out and the sky was mostly bright and clear but the temperature was still devastatingly low. The glow of the sun was almost blinding but it wasn’t emitting any warm rays today, it was a pseudo-sun.

He did however feel like the other sun was compensating for that as he felt warmth radiating off of the source to his right. Turning his head in that direction, he was met with a smiling Mingyu and the action warmed his cold heart.

Sure, Mingyu can be my sun. He thought happily, never one to refuse a working heat source when the weather was this chilly and foreboding.

He began walking a bit closer to the taller boy, and Mingyu leaned in letting their forearms knock together every now and then.

 

 

‘I’m surprised, hyung.’ The younger stated with a lopsided grin -cute.

‘About?’ Wonwoo looked up slightly from where he was carefully watching his step, almost slipping as soon as he did.

‘Woah, careful...’ Mingyu grabbed his upper arm securely, steadying him. He continued to hold on, even after Wonwoo’s regained his balance and they were walking again. The latter didn’t have the heart to tell him to let go so he just let it be.

‘And I’m surprised because you haven’t asked me ONCE where we were going, even though you wouldn’t stop asking about it last night.’

Wonwoo was confused by Mingyu’s statement, like really confused. “Last night”? That never happened. He was sure of it. But now that it’s been mentioned, he was suddenly very curious to know where Mingyu was taking him. The nearest coffee shop was three minutes in the opposite direction of their current trek.

‘Where are we going?’ He asked, tone confused when they slowed down to a stop in the middle of a residential road.

Mingyu circled a sleek expensive-looking black land-rover, unlocking it with a beep and a flash of lights.

‘Get in.’

Wonwoo was too stunned to move for a second, then he climbed in and was rendered speechless at the level of luxury inside the car. Only really rich people could afford cream-coloured real leather interiors, he was sure cars like this one were custom-made and that had to be expensive.

‘Wow...’ the single-worded exclamation slipped through his cracked lips before he could stop it from being heard.

‘You look funny when you’re stunned’ Mingyu made the unhelpful observation, Wonwoo cursed in his mind.

‘Doesn’t everyone?’

‘Hmm, I guess you’re right. Seatbelt, hyung. Don’t wanna be late now, do we?’ His eyebrows wiggled, tone teasing.

It’s as if he knew he had the upper hand because he chose the destination, whereas Wonwoo was still clueless. Nonetheless, he fastened his seatbelt, albeit with a frown and watched as Mingyu began the drive to wherever it was that he was taking them.

Wonwoo gave up on asking where they were going when Mingyu’s reply to everything became either a single eyebrow wiggle or a double. He wasn’t sure since he couldn’t see them.

Wonwoo did wear his contacts today, so it wasn’t a problem with his vision. It’s just that most people would have trouble discerning what kind of activity occurred behind a thick curtain of hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I WILL see this to the end.  
> I will NOT abandon this fic.
> 
> Ok, I needed to say (type) that. I give up on my stories WAAAY too often, I want this meanie fic to be completed & I wanna be proud of it too.
> 
> CAN I JUST SAY I LURVE MEANIE, LIKE SO MUCH.
> 
> It's going well? so far & I'm happy to know that some peeps are liking it, I'll try to update more often.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	7. Chapter 7

As he looked out the window at the passing trees, buildings and people, he sighed. He’d been thinking really hard but that only confused him further, he didn’t know where he was right now nor where he was headed, he didn’t know why Mingyu chose to spend this time with him and he was still trying to figure out what he meant by “last night”.

The hum of something vibrating caught his attention successfully, halting his thoughts for now. Since Soonyoung was yet to return his phone it could only be Mingyu’s. The said boy looked content while he drove, both hands lightly tapping the steering wheel to the beat of the vibrations.

‘Aren’t you gonna pick up?... And where the hell are you taking me, I agreed to coffee not kidnap’

Wonwoo added the last part when all he got for an answer to the first part was a creepy smile and another forehead wiggle. Mingyu’s right arm reached over for a hidden compartment just next to the radio where he retrieved a small black shiny looking thing, he put it in his ear and pressed a button.

‘Kim Mingyu. I’m currently driving, can you call me back later?’

A pause, this part of the conversation Wonwoo couldn’t hear, but he could try to read the other’s expression. He was grimacing –what did that mean? Oh well, guess he’d have to settle for Mingyu’s velvety voice, then.

‘I don’t think I can make it for lunch mum, or even dinner. Remember how I finish much later now?’

The digital numbers on the panel said it was 11:56am, but since Wonwoo had no clue when the younger showed up, he didn’t know how long they’d been together. Would Mingyu be having lunch with his mum, if he weren’t with Wonwoo?

‘No. I canNOT cancel what I’m doing now, I’m with someone. It would be rude, and you taught me better.’

Wonwoo looked up just in time to see Mingyu winking at him -although, it was more of an exaggerated blink. Adorable, regardless.

‘Sorry mum, tell the others I’ll be there for dinner tomorrow... No, I promise this time.’

His tone of voice was sweet and from what Wonwoo could hear they seemed close. That was cute and Wonwoo had to bite his lip to stop from smiling.

He removed the earpiece, returning it to its place, after ending the call with his mother.

‘We’re almost there, hyung’ Mingyu glanced to his right when he got no reply, observing calmly as Wonwoo tried really hard to act like he didn’t care.

 

 

He pulled into a bay at a parking lot, it appeared to be some kind of restaurant. Cool, he thought. How dare you change the plans from coffee to lunch without consulting me, you idiot? He wanted to say that out loud but Mingyu was already out of the car and waiting for him, so he bit his tongue.

They walked together in silence, partly because Wonwoo was still biting his tongue, to stop himself from saying something stupid or offensive or both.

‘Hyung. You don’t look happy. The internet said it was the best Italian place in Seoul, they make everything from scratch’

Mingyu was defending his choice and Wonwoo was just plain confused. He was starting to feel like he might’ve missed something, Mingyu sounded so sure that Wonwoo would love this.

Granted, he didn’t hate it. Italian was Soonyoung’s favourite food so he grew up learning to love everything from pizza to pasta. But it still wouldn’t be his go-to choice of food, so why did Mingyu -an almost stranger- believe Wonwoo should be loving it.

‘That’s cool. I don’t mind Italian’ he answered dismissively. Wrong move, apparently.

‘WHAT!?...’

Wonwoo craned his neck to look back at a shocked Mingyu. He stopped walking, his eyes and mouth were wide open and both hands were squeezing his own face. He looked like that one overused emoji and it was super cute.

‘Hyung. What do you mean “you don’t mind”? YOU LOVE Italian, your favourite is spaghetti’

Wonwoo chuckled in his confusion, where was Mingyu getting all this false information and then believing it so strongly to be the truth.

‘Who told you that?’

‘YOU DID.’ He replied incredibly fast, completely certain as he pointed an accusatory finger in Wonwoo’s chest. Bless the poor kid, he looked so confused and it was so cute. But Wonwoo was also beyond perplexed, he did NOT have that kind of conversation with Mingyu.

He was just about to voice his opinion on the whole matter being a pile of stinky bullshit, he wanted to set the record straight and figure out who was lying to the kid, while pretending to be Wonwoo. But then he saw Mingyu’s adorable pink pout, the dejected glint in his puppy eyes and his heart softened. It didn’t help that Mingyu was holding onto Wonwoo’s coat sleeve with his fingers -he couldn’t upset him anymore.

So, his statement changed midway through the second word.

‘I didn- diiid?... I mean yeah. I did, didn’t I?’ He scratched the back of his head and bit his lip in embarrassment. He was even lying for the kid’s sake now -he needed to find out what was wrong with him.

Judging by Mingyu’s easy-going smile and twinkling eyes as he ordered for them, it was safe to assume that he fell for Wonwoo’s white lie.

 

 

 

 

On the inside, the family-restaurant was bigger than he anticipated, the prices were great and the place was kept really clean. The interior was airy and had many wood accents, the colours used on some of the walls and furniture were primarily those of the Italian flag. Most walls had floor to ceiling glass windows which were letting in plenty of sunlight. Overall, it had a welcoming and pleasant atmosphere.

Their food arrived piping hot and absolutely fresh, they listened as the waiter explained the food to them. From where they got the raw ingredients to the origin of the dish itself, it was interesting.

Just as Wonwoo thought that, Mingyu voiced his opposing opinion.

‘Such useless information, why would I need to know that margarita is named after some queen from the 19th century?’

He mumbled as he bit off more than half the entire slice in one bite, then proceeded to stuff the rest in his mouth and close his eyes, moaning in bliss.

Wonwoo nearly choked on his spaghetti, he should’ve been disgusted by the younger’s actions and his questionable sounds -that belonged in the red district not in a family restaurant. Instead he was getting hot, his cheeks blushing as he looked down at his food.

They finished their meals in relative silence, since Mingyu was a barbaric eater and food flew out of his mouth whenever he spoke. At some point during their meal, -when the food shower intensified- Wonwoo stuffed a pizza slice in the younger’s blabbering mouth and told him to “shut up and eat.” Adding a “we can talk later” when the younger’s eyes turned droopy and glassy.

 

 

 

Wonwoo will tell you that he truly tried, he pushed, shoved and yelled but Mingyu had longer arms so he failed.

He glared at the humming giant beside him, of course he’d be happy he got to pay for the food.

‘Hyung, you never told me the name of your goldfish’

Random much. Wonwoo raked his brain, did he mention the goldfish at all today? No, he doesn’t think he did. This is creepy, was Mingyu some kind of stalker. But he was so cute, he couldn’t be.

‘His name was Lord Goldling.’ He answered, surprisingly smoothly.

‘Woah, that’s a super cool name’  
Mingyu sounded very interested, and Wonwoo had to look away because he couldn’t deal with his childish excitement.

‘It’s also fake, my goldfish didn’t have a name.’ He was shoved gently on the shoulder and they laughed together at Wonwoo’s terrible joke.

‘If I ever get a goldfish, I’ll call it Lord Goldling’ Mingyu’s voice turned wistful as if he really was imagining the future.

‘Seriously?... why?’ He couldn’t keep his surprise from colouring the words.

‘Cuz.’ Mingyu stated matter-of-factly.

They finally got back to the car and Wonwoo melted into luxury’s lap –also known as Mingyu’s car. He decided in that short moment that he was in love with it, if only it was this easy to fall in love with a human and come to terms with it. But it wasn’t easy, which is why Wonwoo never even gave himself the opportunity to start.

‘I hope you know that’s not a real answer.’ He closed his eyes and mumbled with a tired smile –was it just him or did other people also need to nap if they laid somewhere comfortable after a satisfying meal. He closed his eyes for a few minutes without falling asleep.

A bit more relaxed, he began observing the blurred scenery outside his tinted window. As he was watching the sun, he wondered if it was also following other people or just them.

 

 

 

‘It’s an amazing name, and it deserves to be used’ Mingyu finally blurted in a confident tone, it seems like he’s been thinking about it the whole time he drove and they were now nearing the residential roads where the car was parked before.

‘It took you quite long to come up with that’ He yawned, -inner savage surfacing when tired- cracking his neck and causing the younger to wince.

‘I was thinking. And doesn’t that hurt?’ He kept glancing at Wonwoo, concerned -Awww, how sweet.

‘NOPE, doesn’t hurt. Also, that’s what I’m saying... it took you THAT long and it wasn’t even THAT good’

Mingyu parked the car, killed the engine and crossed his arms.

‘Get out.’

Wonwoo chortled, Mingyu trying to look angry was by far the funniest thing he’d seen all day.

The younger boy tried to look offended by Wonwoo’s reaction, he failed. At least he tried, even though he ended up looking like an overgrown toddler throwing a temper tantrum.

He couldn’t even tell if the other was being serious, because if he was, then this was beyond adorable. He’d have to adopt him.

‘Wow, much fierce. I’m surprised Kim Mingyu, I didn’t take you for the fierce type’

Lies. With the kind of muscle & height the younger had, Wonwoo knew Mingyu could easily be “fierce”.

But he was having fun watching Mingyu get increasingly irritated at his relentless teasing.

This was strange, Wonwoo didn’t normally do this but the other’s cute reactions were borderline addictive, he wanted to see more.

 

 

And “more” he got when Mingyu swept his hair back revealing his hot eyebrows and as calmly as he could -not very calm at all, his fists were almost shaking- he stated.

‘GET. OUT.’

‘Such scare. I’m shaking.’

Wonwoo really WAS planning to stop and apologise after this one, he just couldn’t help it. He discovered that once Mingyu was angry/annoyed to a certain point his voice got really high-pitched, he messed with his hair (a lot) and his face got gradually redder. Like now, when he full-on shrieked out in banshee mode.

‘I SAID GET OUT’

‘I know cutie. I heard you well enough the first 3 times’

Ok, maybe THAT was taking it too far. Then again. Wonwoo didn’t know teasing the younger was this much fun, it was hard to stop.

But he thought maybe he should’ve. -stopped, that is- when Mingyu threw the car keys at him, exited the vehicle, shut the door aggressively with a pout and began to literally stomp away like a child.

Wonwoo was in stitches, laughing hysterically at the younger’s antics. If he laughed anymore today he’d be needing real medical stitches.

 

 

 

He quickly slid off the comfy leather, closing the door much gentler than Mingyu had and jogging up to the younger after making sure the car was locked.

‘HEY, WAIT UP’ he yelled at his broad back, it was hard trying to catch up when Mingyu had the advantage of longer legs. Not to mention the fact that Wonwoo was weakened by the giggles, because Mingyu still had the most adorable pout when he looked back to glare.

At least he was waiting now, the taller watched as a smiley Wonwoo caught up with him.

‘Sorry.’ He apologised once they fell in step, Mingyu might’ve nodded in acknowledgment -which Wonwoo couldn’t see anyway, since he was focused on not tripping- but he didn’t reply.

So Wonwoo tried again, just to make sure.

‘You’re not really mad, right?’

‘Shut up.’

‘Is that any way to speak to your elders?’ He felt like Jeonghan even though he meant none of it.

‘You don’t deserve my respect, you’re not a real HYUNG’ Ouch, that kind of hurt. He felt genuine sadness at those words, even though Mingyu probably didn’t mean them.

‘FINE. FUCK YOU THEN’ dammit, that was impulsive. He face-palmed internally.

His friends were such terrible influences on him, he was acting just like Jeonghan now. He couldn’t stay and face Mingyu after what he just said so he began walking briskly the rest of the way to work.

‘Hyung, wait.’ It was Mingyu, so he didn’t wait.

But it was Mingyu so he caught up with ease and grabbed his arm -darn it, him and his puppy eyes and his long legs.

‘You’re so overdramatic, hyung. I swear.’

Wonwoo yanked his arm free, scowling at the younger to show his distaste.

He began walking again, Mingyu following close behind like an eager puppy until he felt a comfortable weight behind his neck and warmth by his side. Mingyu had his arm around him and it was heaven.

But as much as he wanted to melt into the gesture and milk-it for all it was worth, he knew he couldn’t. Wonwoo was supposed to be mad right now for some reason or other -he couldn’t remember, but that didn’t matter. What mattered was this, Mingyu was using a dirty tactic and Wonwoo would lose if he fell for it.

So he ducked under the arm, separating himself. Then proceeded to make some space between them.

Mingyu froze. Clearly not expecting that and his shocked face was so cute, Wonwoo couldn’t keep his cool anymore and burst out laughing. Loud and unrestrained, knees nearly buckling into the mushy, melting snow with the force of it.

Mingyu watched him laugh, grinning in all his beautiful glory and re-placing his arm around Wonwoo as he dragged him along. They shared a brief moment of eye contact, in which they exchanged unspoken words of glee and a promise of more to come. 

They’d taken -a very liberal- three hours for lunch and would most definitely have to stay later to finish their work. But that was the beauty of being in senior positions, they basically had no one to answer to and could come and go as they pleased -depending on their workload, of course.

And sadly, for Wonwoo, the smile fell right off as he entered his office. Because he had no shortage of work today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Their FIRST non-date date, how cute.  
> I always write late at night when I should be sleeping, I'm not even sure how I come up with this crap, I just let it flow like diarrhoea.  
> That. was nasty.  
> Sorry.
> 
> I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPPY.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	8. Chapter 8

At around 11pm, he chased the old man with the cleaning supplies and almost begged him to do his office. After he got a “yes”, Wonwoo packed his bag and left.

As he reached the bus stop it turned out the bus that’d just departed -the one Wonwoo hoped wasn’t his- was actually his. What a bloody surprise!

Now, he was waiting 30 minutes for the next one. The joy.

He’d honestly rather walk, but the pavements were still icy and thus slippery, it meant he wouldn’t be home for at least another hour or two. No can do.

 

 

 

He planted his icy bum on the freezing plastic seat, having to lean instead of completely sit down since he was a little too tall.

Staring off into the darkness of the sky, he noticed the lack of stars, but there were a few lights from aircrafts. He could pretend those were stars, they were tiny and bright just like the real thing anyway. But Wonwoo was a realist, he couldn’t make himself believe that.

He was so engrossed in the sky, that he didn’t notice the car that pulled up in front of him -ok illegal. The windows were blacked out so he didn’t know what to make of it, he ignored it and went back to observing the night sky.

Until the passenger window rolled down and a tired looking Mingyu waved at him.

Gasp. No wonder it looked so familiar, Mingyu was here for HIM. Then came the important questions.

Should he get in at this time? Were they friends? They’ve only hung out once and Wonwoo already pissed him off. There was also the slight possibility that Mingyu was a stalker, did he want to lead a stalker right to his front door? Then again, if he WAS a stalker he’d already know where Wonwoo lived, right? Right.

 

 

It all came down to this crucial fact. Wonwoo was lazy, the car was warm and comfy so stalker or not, Wonwoo realised he didn’t give an eff.

He got in, buckled up and they were off.

Roughly three minutes before they arrived at Wonwoo’s apartment, Mingyu’s hushed voice roused him from his light sleep.

‘Hyung, where exactly do you live?’ He looked sheepish, like he was only remembering to ask now.

‘You can just drop me off here, I live nearby’ Wonwoo said getting ready to jump off.

‘It’s fine hyung, I wanna see where you live and it’s not too far from work anyway’

Wonwoo should be feeling creeped out but he’d just woken up so his brain was sluggish and Mingyu had a soothing voice so he smiled instead, giving the younger very specific directions to his apartment.

He was right, Wonwoo did live close to work, the journey only taking half an hour by bus and even less by car. He was lucky when he found this place with Soonyoung, just as they graduated. A 2-bedroom apartment in the heart of the city for that kind of price, was really hard to come by.

Especially when it wasn’t ugly and rundown, everyone had called it a “bargain”. They called it their “graduate pad” and made their friends pay to enter for the first week, it was fun.

However, the “fun” didn’t last very long because Soonyoung moved out to live with Jihoon -he had the better apartment- only 14 months later. The traitor.

So Wonwoo had been struggling with the rent all on his own, the promotion really coming at a good time. Not only did it save his career but also his home and for that he was eternally grateful.

 

 

‘It’s this one. There’s underground parking but you can just drop me off here, it’s easier for you.’

Mingyu nodded, putting the car in park and craning his neck out the window, with awe sparkling in his eyes.

‘Wow. It’s super big, how many floors?’

‘Umm I think around 30, I live on the 17th’

If someone were to ask why he felt the need to add the last part, he’d say that he just didn’t see Mingyu as a threat. The kid was so fluffy and cute and weird and kind and funny and hot and Wonwoo stopped himself before he said those out loud.

Strangely, he didn’t think negatively about giving that piece of information away.

‘Does it have lifts?’

He asked looking genuinely curious as he tilted his head to the side.

‘Lifts?...’

Of course, Wonwoo knew what Mingyu meant, but where was the fun in letting it slide. He tilted his head too, mimicking the younger’s expression.

‘I meant like elevators.’

Mingyu clarified, not realising Wonwoo was trolling him again.

‘What? So you expect people to casually walk up 30 flights of stairs on a daily?’

‘Can you just answer the question WITHOUT making me feel stupid, hyung.’

He whined and just like that Wonwoo’s nose scrunched up at his adorableness, the younger’s stalker-esc tendencies forgotten.

‘Sorry, yeah it’s got 4. But they’re selective so they don’t stop on every floor’

‘How would you know it’s going to your floor then?’

‘You check. Duh’  
He stated in a matter-of-fact tone.

Mingyu was quickly done being offended and began smiling brightly again.

‘Hyung, have lunch with me tomorrow.’ It was worded like a question but it sounded like a decision was already made for him. Wonwoo turned to the younger, intending to kindly decline. But Mingyu was pouting and fluttering his long lashes so Wonwoo obviously couldn’t reject him.

It appears his silence was taken as confirmation and the younger chirped,

‘I’ll see you tomorrow then, hyung. Good night.’

His grin was contagious, his lips glistening and rosy, his eyes dark and twinkling, his beautiful golden skin bathed in moonlight, his cheekbones prominent and his jawline sharp and when he spoke Wonwoo didn’t want to stop hearing that voice. He was feeling a bit lightheaded and a whole lot confused so he barked a short.

‘You too.’

Then he was running inside the building and pressing all the elevator buttons, even though only one of them would be going to the 17th floor.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Up in his apartment, he was safe. Here there was no Mingyu to make his knees feel weak and his insides funny. Just him and... apparently someone else.

There was a pair of trainers that weren’t his. Of course, being the realist he was, he didn’t freak out. He checked the kitchen after finding no one in his living room, nothing.

Since he couldn’t see anyone he focused on hearing them, that’s when he heard shuffling from his bedroom. The door was ajar -he was certain it was closed when he left this morning- and the sounds were increasing in volume the more he crept towards it.

When he was close enough he flicked on the lights and started yelling at the top of his lungs -not because he’d seen anything but because this was his plan all along. To catch them off guard.

A disoriented head of red hair sprung up on his bed, Soonyoung was sleeping here?

‘Oh Wonwoo, Hiiii- AHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHhHh’

The red head shrieked, falling backwards off the bed as he cried something unintelligible, sounding a bit like- apologies?

Alarmed at his friend’s reaction he rushed to his side, -or at least he tried to. But another heart wrenching cry from Soonyoung, saw his footsteps skidding to a halt.

‘What’s wrong? You’re freaking me out. Are you ok?’ Wonwoo’s heart was beating a mile-a-minute as he gestured with his arms to work off some of the tension.

He was shaken and shaking. Consequently, his common sense and awareness weren’t in the best of states. Therefore, he didn’t realise the butcher knife that he’d been waving around at his friend.

 

 

A clank, as the heavy metal and plastic object hit the ground, an outcry of horror as Wonwoo finally realised why Soonyoung was so scared.

Turns out Wonwoo WAS more freaked out by his intruder than he made himself believe, to the point that he didn’t even notice having grabbed a weapon. Well, at least NOW he knew he could trust his subconscious self -in case there’s a REAL threat.

However, Wonwoo didn’t have time to dwell on his little dilemma, how he got the knife was only a minor concern compared to the hot mess on his floor.

Soonyoung was full-on crying now, big fat hot tears streaming down his fluffy cheeks, his face was red, puffy and snotty and Wonwoo ignored the flinch as he gathered the boy in his arms.

‘I’m so sorry, Soon.’

He apologised sincerely, he could almost hear his heart break for the distress he caused the poor boy.

‘I’MMM S-SOR-RY TOOOOO, WON.’

He hiccupped and coughed into Wonwoo’s shoulder -no doubt soaking the fabric- as he held on tightly to the bunched up material with his fists.

‘No. I’M sorry, you must’ve been so shocked. It’s ok.’ He murmured running his hand comfortingly up and down the shorter’s heaving back in an attempt to soothe the cries.

It seemed to be working, since Soonyoung’s crying was reduced to sparse sniffles and his breathing evened out.

‘I thought you were gonna kill me after you found out about Mingyu... you’re such a bestest best friend, I love you.’

Wonwoo startled, peeling a beaming albeit snotty-faced Soonyoung from himself and fixing him with a suspicious stare as he held him by the shoulders.

‘How do you know Mingyu? And what am I meant to know concerning him?’ He enquired, his face taking on a hard look as the colour drained from Soonyoung’s.

‘B-but the knife. I thought you knew.’

Both boys looked at the mentioned tool and grimaced,

‘Soon, I didn’t deliberately swing that in your face, trust me. And anyway, if I wanted to kill you, you’d know.’

Wonwoo looked mock-inconspicuously to his left where the sharp metal lay and Soonyoung actually shivered. Looks like Wonwoo was a better actor than he gave himself credit for.

‘I’d speak up about this Mingyu crap, before I test out how sharp that is.’

It’s no wonder Soonyoung nearly wet himself, Wonwoo was scaring even himself at how good he was acting.

The redhead’s left foot was shaking uncontrollably and his right eye was twitching every other second, both tell-tale signs that Soonyoung was holding it in. Years of being joined at the hip made the other very easy to read.

‘W-what do you wanna know?’ His voice sounded distant as if his body was here but his mind had already escaped elsewhere.

Wonwoo fixed him with a glare, ‘Every. Thing.’

‘Mingyu. H-he texted me on Sat- I mean Y-YOU on S-Saturday but since I had your phone...’

There were many questions he could’ve asked at this point, like “how did he get my number?” Or “why are you shaking?” Or “Why are you only telling me this now?” Or even “why does it matter?” But the one that came out of his mouth in a cold clipped tone was a foreboding,

‘Since you had my phone, WHAT?’ He felt a sense of dread, there was no way this was ending on a good note.

‘Your password didn’t change from 8th grade.’

‘I know, idiot. Spit it out, what the hell did you do, HUH?’ He shook him by the shoulders as he said the last few words, his eyes wild and frantic.

‘OK. I pretended to be you and we chatted on text for like 4 hours last night. I’M SORRY, DON’T KILL ME.’ He shielded his head with his arms as he screamed the final part, his whole body looked like it was vibrating like he genuinely feared for his safety.

He should’ve been, Wonwoo prides himself in his patience when things get serious but nothing could’ve prepared him for the sheer volume of anger, desperation and mortification that hit him in that moment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He’d had lunch with Mingyu, teased the life out of him AND gotten a ride home, all whilst being oblivious to a whole other “conservation” that he’d shared with him. He needed to know what Soonyoung said to him so he could freak out accordingly.

At least this explains why Mingyu seemed to already know what he was doing, like the goldfish incident and the spaghe-

‘You told him I liked Italian?’ It wasn’t even a question, Wonwoo knew the answer.

‘Sorry, sometimes when you’re talking in first person you get confused, I had a few slip ups’ his voice was small, but sufficiently calmer than before as he spoke behind Wonwoo’s pillow.

‘A few?’

He sounded defeated, he didn’t even know the extent of the damage caused but he was already dreading having to face Mingyu tomorrow.

‘Yeah, so he thinks you’re a shit cook...’

Okay true, Wonwoo thought. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as he feared. But apparently, he thought too soon.

‘He also thinks you’re a great dancer and that you can skateboard, he thinks you suck at maths and that you had a crush on Mario till you were 17. Oh, and he thinks you think reading isn’t fun’

‘WHAT THE HELL?! Are you serious? That’s like ANTI-Wonwoo. It’s against everything I stand for.’

‘That’s not true. You CAN dance.’ Soonyoung was quick to defend, but even he couldn’t make that statement sound convincing. How was he supposed to tell Mingyu none of that was true?

Mingyu. He took him to an Italian restaurant believing it to be his “favourite”, that meant he liked Soonyoung’s “Wonwoo”, at least enough to have wanted to impress him.

He thought back to the few hours he spent with the younger boy earlier. They both had fun, memories of them smiling and laughing together making up the majority of their time. Even when Wonwoo annoyed him and Mingyu was “upset” he still looked like he was enjoying Wonwoo’s company.

So, did that mean Mingyu liked the real Wonwoo too? He DID give him a ride home and ask him to have lunch again, after all. He wouldn’t do that if he hated Wonwoo, surely. And maybe “they” spoke about his apartment in the texts, since that would explain how Mingyu roughly knew the area it was located and just seemed super intrigued.

Oh well, he’d have to wait till the morning to find out.

 

 

 

 

 

He was currently lying awake in bed, having showered and changed into his pyjamas -a warm orange hoodie, grey sweatpants and his favourite pair of fluffy socks. His phone, which he’d received dead was currently charging and he was yet to check his notifications -but at least there were no new cracks on it.

Soonyoung had gone home earlier with a blossoming bruise on his left cheekbone, after having vexed Wonwoo enough to warrant a boot to the face. Luckily for him, that’s all the damage Wonwoo could bring himself to cause. Although, the redhead deserved much worse for what he’d done.

As he let his eyes droop, he realised he wasn’t looking forward to finding out the extent of Satan’s screw up in the morning.

 

 

He also hoped that he could salvage Mingyu and his relatio- friendship, before it sank.


	9. Chapter 9

Instant coffee had a weird taste, it was bitter and grainy. The almost full red mug was piping hot, streams of coffee scented steam coming off of it. His office would surely smell if he didn’t air it out -so he made a mental note to do just that, later.

 

The aftertaste was even weirder, his tongue and throat felt sandpapery and his skin crawled at the feeling of the sleek layer of SOMEthing over his teeth. He grimaced, he really didn’t like it.

 

This just went to prove the fact that Wonwoo despised the cheap stuff and justified the multiple occasions wherein he rejected it.

 

But Chan the intern had come to his office earlier, asking with a sweet smile if he wanted a mug. Wonwoo’s rejection was -as always- ready on the tip of his tongue and Chan’s face fell the longer the silence stretched.

 

He remembered how hardworking the younger was and how genuine he was in all his offers. Also, he DID still feel bad about yelling at him the other day, he couldn’t possibly decline. Could he?

 

Apparently not.

 

However, according to Wonwoo, accepting the coffee was ONE thing, whereas, drinking it was an entirely different matter. Therefore, he didn’t feel obligated to subject himself to further torment and went back to work after sliding the mug to the side.

 

Out of sight, out of mind. He mused, circling over a few errors on the document he was currently reviewing.

 

A knock at his door saw him lifting his head ‘Come in.’

 

‘Sir, I need your signature on this’ the employee handed a stony-faced Wonwoo the document, wasting no time he began immediately skimming through it.

 

The blonde-haired employee -that Wonwoo recognised as one of the quieter ones- cleared his throat. Wonwoo glared at him and the blonde lowered his gaze, nervously messing with his fingers.

 

‘You need something else?’ He asked annoyed as he handed him the signed document.

 

‘Umm, Yes. Mr Wen was asking to see you before lunch, sir’

 

‘Then HE should come here. Tell him that.’

 

The employee looked like he was about to protest but one look from Wonwoo and he was bowing respectfully and heading out the door. Wonwoo wondered what the hell that loud Chinese guy wanted from him, his mood instantly sinking south.

 

After another two disruptions from people who were out to make his life difficult with their useless questions and requests, it was already 12:30pm. In other words, lunch-time, but there was no sign of Wen Junhui yet, nor Mingyu for that matter.

 

Wonwoo didn’t care much about Junhui’s absence, in fact he was glad the other decided not to show.

 

However, in the case of Mingyu, his chest felt heavy. He leaned back in his chair, pulling lint off of his cream turtleneck absentmindedly.

 

What was Mingyu doing now? Why didn’t he come to Wonwoo yet? When was he even supposed to show? Was Wonwoo even ready to face him after the Soonyoung catfish incident?

 

He grabbed his phone at the last thought, unlocking the screen and loading “his” conversation with Mingyu, before he changed his mind.

 

As he scrolled through the texts from the top, he briefly glanced through them. Most were harmless impersonal things such as greetings and talks of the weather or tv shows. He stopped at the part in which Soonyoung declared Wonwoo’s undying love for Italian food and his blood began to boil. At this point in the morning he had thrown his phone across the room, because he was too angry to carry on.

 

But he had to read till the end, he needed to know what else they talked about -just in case it turned out to be something important.

 

He found out that Mingyu had a younger sister who was in middle school, a pet dog whom he’d left in his hometown and missed dearly. He learnt that his favourite food was meat and that he loved eating and ate way more than the average person.

 

He continued to scroll with a smile, he found that he really enjoyed learning all these little things about the taller boy. It made so much sense now that he knew.

 

Wonwoo pouted, suddenly feeling terribly sorry about his negative thoughts towards him. Like how he thought Mingyu was a creepy stalker on multiple occasions or how he doubted and second guessed everything he said, thinking he had an ulterior motive.

 

He caught a glimpse of the word goldfish and a suggestion to have lunch instead of coffee -everything was starting to make sense and all the missing pieces of their interactions were falling into their rightful place the more he read along.

 

They began chatting about their homes, their neighbourhoods and their commutes to and from work. This got really interesting.

 

**-Hyung, I have this really loud couple next door**

**-it’s almost impossible to sleep some nights**

**23:45pm**

 

**-Damnnn, ever tried telling them to keep it down?**

**23:47pm**

**-That’s embarrassing. Would YOU do that?**

**23:48pm**

**-Never.**

**23:48pm**

**-Lmao, EXACTLY**

**-You’re lucky to live close to work you know**

**23:51pm**

**-Yeah, but buses are awful so**

**23:54pm**

**-Still**

**-I live about an hour’s drive away**

**-I have to wake up at dawn to get things done or I wouldn’t have time**

**23:59pm**

**-You drive?**

**00:01am**

**-Yup, I’ve been saving for years to finally get my own car and I’m very proud of it**

**00:01am**

**-I don’t even have my license yet so I don’t care for cars**

**00:02am**

**-I could give you a ride sometime, you’ll love it**

**00:05am**

**-I doubt I will**

**-Anyway, you live alone?**

**00:08am**

**-No, I live with my best friend and his boyfriend stays over so often that he kind of lives with us now**

**00:09am**

**-Are they loud too?**

**00:10am**

**-Very loud**

**00:10am**

**-Poor baby**

**-How do you sleep at night**

**00:13am**

**-Omg**

**-You’re the only one who understands**

**-That’s why I’ve been thinking of moving out**

**00:16am**

**-Closer to work?**

**00:17am**

**-That’d be ideal**

**-But it’s so hard to find a decent place in that area**

**00:18am**

**-Expensive too**

**00:19am**

**-Yeah**

**00:24am**

**-Would you mind rooming with someone?**

**-That way you could share the rent**

**00:32am**

**-Hyung, where would I find someone willing to take me in**

**-I don’t know anyone in that area**

**00:33am**

**-Well**

**-I know someone with a spare room**

**-10-minute drive from work**

**-Nice guy**

**-Nice apartment**

**-Quiet neighbours**

**00:47am**

**-Really?!**

**-Oh my gosh, who?**

**00:49am**

**-JEON WONWOO**

**00:50am**

**-You?!?**

**00:50am**

**-Oh Yh, that’s me**

**-Wanna move in?**

**00:54am**

**-Wow, I didn’t know you liked me THAT much**

**-Isn’t it too soon to move in together**

**-I mean no offence hyung, you’re a great guy and I really like you**

**-But like, we barely know each other so**

**00:59am**

**-You don’t have to move in NOW**

**-I’m just giving you an option**

**-Take your time**

**01:01am**

**-Ok.**

**-Thanks, hyung**

**01:06am**

 

Then the conversation switched over to other less significant topics, Wonwoo closed his eyes and focused on breathing calmly. He locked the phone and placed it down gently on the desk before he did something he’d regret -like launch the metal thing onto the concrete wall.

 

He was feeling some type of way. He wasn’t sure what it was but he knew that he was feeling it. If he thought about this objectively then being angry really made no sense here. He’s been looking for a roommate to share the burden of rent and bills, since Soonyoung ditched him all those months ago. He knew he would be jumping for joy and conducting an interview of compatibility right now, if the potential roommate was any other human.

 

So, he recognised that his problem lay with the fact that this potential roommate was none other than Kim Mingyu.

 

Kim Mingyu the obnoxiously handsome, ridiculously tall Harvard graduate. Kim Mingyu the kind guy with the velvety voice and adorable canines. Kim Mingyu the thoughtful idiot with the gentle touches and soft words. Kim Mingyu who for some reason found Wonwoo interesting enough to want to get to know him and even consider moving in with him.

 

Wonwoo thought he didn’t deserve the attention of such an awesome human. Compared to his boring self, Mingyu was perfect. He was everything people aspired to either BE or be WITH. But everyone was entitled to their own opinions and if Mingyu wasn’t repulsed by Wonwoo then that was his business.

 

It dawned on him that the only thing he could do right now, was wait and see. The ball was in Mingyu’s court and the future of Wonwoo’s spare room lay in his hands. 

 

And there was absolutely nothing Wonwoo could do to change that.

 

Just as he reached this conclusion, his phone vibrated against the wooden desk, startling him -it’s been so long since he last heard that, due to living in technology-free silence for the past few days.

 

The lock screen showed 3 unread messages from Mingyu, and Wonwoo unlocked his phone much faster than he would’ve liked.

 

 

**-Hey**

**-Something came up so I can’t do lunch today**

**-Sorry hyung**

**12:51pm**

 

He frowned at the texts, did Mingyu not like him anymore?

 

He shook his head to rid it of the silly thoughts. Mingyu said “something came up”, and although it’s a particularly vague excuse. Wonwoo had to remind himself that he wasn’t entitled to demand a more detailed explanation.

 

For all he knew, it could be super important. He was about to type an understanding reply when the three bubbles appeared indicating Mingyu was already typing something, so he waited.

 

**-How about dinner?**

**12:53pm**

**-I don’t do dinner**

**12:54pm**

 

Dammit, why did he press send without thinking it through. All Mingyu’s ever done was be kind and understanding of Wonwoo.

 

And here he was, -supposedly the “hyung”, yet all he ever did was hurt and reject. He groaned out loud as he read the following text.

 

**-What do you mean?**

**12:57pm**

**-It means I don’t usually eat dinner...**

**13:00pm**

 

He wasn’t even lying, Wonwoo hated the feeling of going to bed with a heavy stomach, he didn’t normally get hungry enough to eat anyway.

 

By no means did he starve himself either, because if he was feeling a bit peckish he’d grab a cup ramen or a bit of kimpab. It’s just that those nights were rare and he got most of his eating done during the day.

 

**-That...**

**-Can’t be good**

**13:01pm**

 

There he goes, with his concern and consideration making Wonwoo’s heart flutter and his face ache from smiling. Why was this kid so nice to him?

 

**-It’s fine**

**-I’ll see you some other time**

**13:05pm**

 

He got a smiley face in reply and grabbed his coat on his way out of the office.

 

Now that he had a free lunch, he decided to pick up that mysterious novel from the bookstore that he’d been meaning to read. 

 

He hoped the big twinkly-eyed kid kept it for him, like he’d promised -Wonwoo would be upset otherwise.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On the subway, he was eternally grateful for the seat he managed to snatch up as soon as he got on. Ignoring the glares this lady was shooting him, as if her gender entitled her to a seat. He wasn’t a mean person really, but unless she was pregnant or old -which she was neither- then Wonwoo had no reason to give up his seat. He was tired too and he sat here first so she could eff off. He glared right back at her and she huffed, looking away.

 

Good. He thought, listening up for the announcement that told him his station was coming up next.

 

After squeezing and shoving his way through the underground he finally made it to the top, the cool air filled his lungs and he squinted at the brightness of daylight. Soon, he was indoors and the blinding sunlight was now replaced by the equally bright artificial lighting. He navigated his way to the escalators with the ease and familiarity of a frequent visitor, -Which he was. There was even a time when Wonwoo came here daily, he was sure he’d come at least a few times a week since he was 18.

 

The jingle of bells welcomed him to the cosy bookstore and an unexpected familiar face greeted him with a warm embrace at the door, he didn’t even have enough time to catch his breath before it was knocked out of him with the force of the hug. She might have been old enough to be his grandmother but the store owner was by far not a weakling.

 

‘Oh, what a pleasant surprise? If it isn’t our very own Jeon Wonwoo.’

 

The happiness radiating off her aged features was so overwhelming as she gently held Wonwoo’s face in her softly wrinkled hands.

 

He couldn’t help but beam at her, despite the ache in his back from having to bend down to accommodate the much smaller lady. She always treated him so warmly –as if he really were her grandson- she reminded him of family and he always felt loved after one of her hugs.

 

‘It IS me. Hello.’ She chuckled softly at him, then she fell silent, casting a wise eye over him.

 

‘Haven’t you been eating well, dear? You’ve lost a lot of weight’ she observed, quite accurately actually and he suddenly felt embarrassed.

 

This old lady had known Wonwoo since he was a fresh faced 18-year-old, knowing nothing about city life as he came up from the countryside. She employed him despite all that, trusting him with her store and doing her best to accommodate his hectic schedule and allowing him the space and freedom to read to his heart’s content. Often times, she’d prepare meals for him or pour him a cup of tea, making him feel like he was coming home every time he went to work.

 

That was probably the reason he associated feelings of warmth, love and nostalgia with the bookstore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just did a double update, I don't think I've ever done a double before.  
> Maybe I have. I dunno.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	10. Chapter 10

They sat down in the breakroom with a piping hot cup of citrus tea each, and Wonwoo filled her in on his life over the past year or so.

‘Is your new job quite demanding, dear?’

‘I’d say it is, but I enjoy it for the most part.’ He stopped unsure whether to update her on the other significant development in his life.

He glanced at her beady eyes, her gentle face was overwhelmed with crinkles and smile lines –a testimony to what a happy, loving person she really was.

‘Go on, dear. What else do you want to tell me?’

‘Well, I got promoted recently. So that’s a thing and…’ he stole a glance at the old lady and found that she was smiling, replacing the cup after taking a sip of her tea. She nodded encouragingly at him when she caught his indecisive gaze.

‘I met someone… at work…’ he bit his lip, should he really be having this conversation with his ex-boss.

‘That’s lovely. Is he a nice boy, dear?’ Wonwoo burnt himself with the tea and snapped his head up. The shock in his widened eyes must’ve been evident on his face because she chuckled and squeezed his hand with a knowing expression.

‘I can’t believe you knew I was gay.’ He shook his head in disbelief, albeit smiling as he couldn’t locate a single sign of judgement or hostility on her ever-smiling face.

‘You might’ve forgotten, Wonwoo. But I have children and grandchildren and let me tell you, it wasn’t very hard to figure out that little fact about you. Now tell me about this sweet boy of yours?’

Wonwoo sighed contentedly, feeling his eyes crinkle with the brightness of his smile. He wished he could see his face right now –he rarely got this smiley.

His face sobered up along with his conscious as he began to speak again, trying really hard to pour all the doubts in his heart.

‘He’s nice. Too nice, I feel. I don’t know, I think he likes me but I’m not sure why. And I don’t know why he’s being so nice to me, my friend thinks I like like him. But I don’t know, I think… I think I’m confused because like I said he’s just too nice. I don’t know.’

He shrugged, shying away from her intent stare, like she was focusing all her attention on him.

‘Right.’ She leaned away from him, crossing her small arms as her face took on a serious expression.

He sat up straight, and waited patiently for the lady to speak –she looked like she had a lot to say and Wonwoo knew he wasn’t going to like some of it.

‘Oh dear, did you hear how many times you said, “I don’t know”?... I think the reason for your confusion, dear, is not that you don’t know but that you’re not quite ready to know.’

‘What do you mean?’ he didn’t even realise he’d been repeating the three-worded expression until she pointed it out and now, his forehead creased as he frowned in thought.

‘Confusion can sometimes cloud your mind, making you not see the obvious path that you should take. The what ifs could be the devils that delude your instinct, they give you tempting alternatives and you’re suddenly not so sure anymore.’

She took a breath and held both his hands over the table.

‘What I’m trying to say is. Every decision has a degree of uncertainty and risk attached to it and often times you say you don’t know because you lack the courage to make that decision. You don’t have the confidence to trust that your chosen path will give the desired result.’

That sounded deep and heavy, and it resonated with a part of him that he hadn’t connected with in a while.

‘BUT that’s ok. Because confusion is only a state of mind and your mind is ever evolving. It’ll pass soon and you’ll know exactly what you want to do when the time comes.’

Truth -when spoken- had this strange effect on him. Like he was being undressed and finally forced to face the world as himself. Thus, it was a terrifyingly liberating concept but he didn’t think he was ready to face the truth yet.

Although, he didn’t know exactly what the old lady meant, he thought he kind of had an idea what she was talking about. Therefore, he was grateful for the conversation.

 

 

‘I hope you know that didn’t help at all. I’m still Confused’ he voiced with a happy grin as he received his book along with two more -that he didn’t have to pay for- in a gift bag.

‘And I hope you know that you don’t need to fight your instinct so much, you could be keeping yourself from experiencing something very rewarding. Take care, child.’ With a final smile, she imparted her wisdom and disappeared into the back of the store.

He took that as his cue to leave and thought over her words as he nibbled on his lunch -a chicken sandwich- on his way back to the office.

 

 

 

 

Not that he noticed or anything, but he hadn’t heard from Mingyu all week. He didn’t care really, he was too busy living his intriguing life to realise that his chat with Mingyu hadn’t been updated since Tuesday afternoon -it was now the following Thursday.

He habitually refreshed it multiple times a day JUST because he was bored and totally not because he was waiting and expecting SOMEthing from the younger. 

He’d spent the last few days in constant thought.

First, wondering why the younger hadn’t contacted him yet.

Then, debating whether or not he should start a conversation.

Finally, deciding to completely ignore him -because he wasn’t weak and could live just fine without constantly thinking of him.

He stayed up late into the night, slaving away on an upcoming project. He was secretly hoping that a certain someone would pay him a visit.

But when the clock struck 02:00am on a Friday, -with no sign of the overgrown idiot- he had no choice but to angrily get in a taxi and go home.

Wonwoo decided he was dropping Mingyu, how dare he ignore him like this.

 

 

 

 

That Friday morning, he woke up feeling incredibly exhausted, like he hadn’t slept at all. Probably has something to do with the fact that he barely got 4 hours of sleep, but he dragged himself through his morning routine anyway.

By the time he was feeling somewhat awake and less sluggish, he was already running late. He quickly threw a slice of cheese into his single piece of bread -all he had, since he forgot to buy groceries. Again- and folded it in half before wrapping it in tinfoil, grabbing an orange from the almost empty fruit bowl and making a mad dash out of his apartment to the bus stop.

Miraculously, he’d made it to his usual bus. Relaxing into his usual spot at the back and tying his shoelaces -since he didn’t have the time to do it at home. It was by some other miracle that he didn’t trip over them while he ran, but he’ll take it. He just hoped his luck wouldn’t run out, it usually never lasted long.

The work day was going by normally, he had a stack of papers to review and a bunch of books to go through, as usual. The usual number of people knocked on his door asking for him to sign something or taking and delivering paperwork. It was normal, nothing out of the ordinary.

Yet Wonwoo felt uneasy, like something terrible was about to happen. So it wasn’t a complete surprise, when a louder than usual knock sounded at his door and the perpetrator turned the knob, stepping in without Wonwoo’s permission. He knew he wasn’t about to enjoy this.

A tall, handsome brunette -with a smirk some people might describe as hot, strolled into his office taking a seat opposite Wonwoo on one of the guest chairs.

He kept his cool, Junhui was always like this -out to infuriate him. Disrespecting him until he got a reaction- Wonwoo wouldn’t be giving him that today.

The smile he offered his visitor in return was forced and didn’t reach his eyes. And when he spoke he tried to not let it show how much he was hating this.

‘You do know a knock is asking for permission to enter. It kind of defeats the whole point if you barge in anyway’ his criticism was lathered with a healthy dose of sarcasm and topped off with a sneer.

Junhui chuckled, crossing his legs.

‘I thought that rule didn’t apply between close friends’

He drawled then pouted. Wonwoo’s stomach churned, he wanted to throw up.

Some people might have found the Chinese guy cute, adorable even. But there was something inherently annoying about him that made Wonwoo’s skin crawl. He just screamed mistrust and fakeness -he was allergic to fake people.

‘Well, I thought such titles required mutual consent. But apparently not. What do you want Junhui?’

He was done with the pleasantries and wanted him out of his hair ASAP.

‘You’re not even gonna humour me for a bit, that’s very harsh... It’s a miracle he likes someone like you, I couldn’t do it if you paid me’

Wonwoo narrowed his eyes menacingly, he had no right to mention Mingyu, especially when Wonwoo was on a mission to dislike the younger.

‘It’s none of your business whether I’m liked or not. Also, if I had the money I wouldn’t waste it on you. I’d get more out of just burning it to be honest.’

He was starting to feel like the purpose of Junhui’s visit was just to have a go at him and didn’t have anything to do with work at all.

‘I think you need classes to manage your violent outbursts.’

He stated coolly, his laced fingers squeezing tighter on his lap.

‘I think you need to fuck off, if you don’t have something relevant to say.’

He countered just as calmly, his hands remained in their relaxed state by his side. There was no way he’d let Junhui get to him.

‘I think I will e-mail you about the upcoming project, since the hostility in this room is rather unwelcoming… You have a way of making people feel very uncomfortable, you know that?’

He stood up, hands in his pockets as he spoke in a patronising tone. His sneering expression the picture of disgust as he stared down at Wonwoo.

Wonwoo also rose up from his seat, shoving his hands in his pockets and smiling in triumph as he stood a few centimetres taller than the other. He began speaking in a low voice, keeping his tone even.

‘No. But I do know that no one asked for your opinion.’

Junhui scoffed, but Wonwoo continued speaking.

‘Show yourself to the door and don’t be surprised if I don’t reply to your e-mail either.’

The brunette huffed and puffed under his breath, mumbling completely inappropriate things as he slammed the door with more force than he needed to.

Wonwoo fell back into his desk chair, heaving a heavy sigh and rubbing at his temples. Of course, he couldn’t have a normal quiet day for once. But at least he was out of his hair now, so he could work in peace.

Or so he thought.

 

 

 

Yet another knock sounded at his abused door, he ignored it.

The knocking came again, Wonwoo noticed it was quite a gentle knock compared to some of the others. He ignored it again and really tried to focus on his book but the knocking continued.

The person on the other side seemed determined to keep knocking until Wonwoo let them in -and that frankly, pissed him off.

‘What is it now?’ He lamented, glaring at the newcomer.

A head of fluffy dark hair poked through into his office and Wonwoo immediately looked away with an angry scowl.

What the hell was HE doing here? After just ignoring him the way he had. Did he think Wonwoo would just accept him with open arms? No freaking way.

‘Wow. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this mad before.’

The child-like innocence of his awe, was cute to Wonwoo. This realisation angered him some more. Because why were his body and mind betraying him already?

‘Fuck off. I have no time for your bullshit, I’m working.’

Mingyu frowned.

The older boy kept his head up, gaze firmly fixed on his monitor. He feared that his weakening resolve would crumble if he looked in Mingyu’s expressive puppy eyes.

‘Who shoved a stick up your butt this morning?’

Wonwoo could tell by the younger’s light-hearted tone that he was just trying to lessen the tension and didn’t really take an offense to Wonwoo’s earlier comment.

The older glared at him, getting angrier the longer he felt almond shaped eyes softly observing him. It wasn’t working, Mingyu was still being nice to him. He felt the fight draining out of him as he looked at the younger’s endearing grin.

Mingyu grabbed the chair Junhui sat in earlier and placed it right beside Wonwoo, sitting backwards on it while facing the older.

 

 

‘I think I told you to leave already.’

He mumbled after a short while, looking away to hide his blush because he wasn’t comfortable with the proximity.

‘I’m not here to pick fights with you, hyung. I’m just here to ask if you wanted to grab some lunch with me, I have some things I need to tell you.’

Oh, so now he suddenly remembers the insignificant being called Jeon Wonwoo. Was he just a tool the taller used when he was bored and lonely. Was he just taking advantage of the quiet emo boy who seemed to look up to him and cater to his needs. Well, whatever his reasons were for coming here, Wonwoo didn’t care. He would NOT be playing the nice guy today.

‘I’m not in the mood, I’m busy’

‘Hyung, you’re literally glaring at a blank word document. I don’t think you’re busy’ 

Mingyu giggled adorably, poking Wonwoo’s red cheek with a slender golden finger.

‘Maybe it’s you then, maybe I don’t wanna have lunch with you.’

His red cheeks were blushing harder than ever and it’d be difficult to attribute it to anger if he didn’t raise his voice and throw more of a tantrum. So even though he knew he’d regret it, he said those words -with the sole purpose of hurting Mingyu so he could leave him alone.

‘Really?’

The younger’s previously bright expression turned crestfallen, Wonwoo felt a jab of pain in his core.

‘No... I packed lunch. It’s nothing personal, I just wanna be alone right now’

He lost. His soft heart just wouldn’t listen to him when it came to Mingyu. It was as if the younger’s pain was his own and he hated knowing that he was causing it.

‘Can I see it then?’

Mingyu mumbled after a short pause.

‘WHAT? Why the fuck would you ask to see my lunch?’

Wonwoo was bewildered, he didn’t understand the logic. What was in it for Mingyu anyway? What would he get out of looking at his lunch?

‘Because.’

The pouting boy sat up straight in his chair, suddenly looking serious as his tall figure loomed over Wonwoo’s head.

‘That’s not an answer, Mingyu’

He found it hard to look away once their gazes met, Mingyu’s eyes were such a deep shade of brown and so full of life and emotion. They demanded Wonwoo’s attention and kept him captivated.

‘Show me.’

The look in Mingyu’s piercing gaze as he made that demand, sent a delicious shiver down his rigid spine and compelled him to place the half cheese sandwich and squished orange on the desk. As if bound by a spell.

‘There. Happy now?’

The spell was broken the moment Mingyu’s intense gaze landed on the sorry items of food. His voice rising an entire octave as his eyes widened.

‘That’s it?!’

Wonwoo looked away, suddenly sheepish. He realised how bad it must look to Mingyu who was a self-proclaimed foodie and borderline glutton.

He didn’t have the heart to stop Mingyu as he tore the tinfoil to examine the contents of the sandwich. Then the younger had a mini outburst.

‘Are you serious? That’s all you’re having? Half a cheese sandwich and an overripe orange, really?!’

‘It’s MY lunch, not yours.’

He defended childishly, glowering in embarrassment.

‘That’s hardly enough for an 8-year-old girl let alone a grown man!’

The passion in his voice was undying, this was genuine concern he was hearing -his heart melted at the thought, but he couldn’t let Mingyu know that.

‘It’s NONE of your business what I eat, Mingyu.’

He voiced in a bored tone, almost dismissive and tired as he pretended to be busy with the abandoned file on his left.

‘Are you seriously not even gonna eat dinner after this? No wonder you’re always falling ill and getting hospitalised. THIS IS NOT OKAY.’

He remembered reading about his hospitalisations in the texts Mingyu shared with Soonyoung. If the younger seemed concerned then, he was definitely beyond worried now.

‘I really have to get back to work. I appreciate the concern but it’s none of your business, so leave me alone.’

‘I will most certainly NOT let you do this to yourself...’

The younger boy stood up, his jaw set in determination and his gaze harder than any steel Wonwoo has ever encountered.

‘Also, I’m not sure why you’re suddenly being such a meanie. But I don’t give up easily, I’ll be back soon.’

he leaned in, confidently murmuring the last sentence, a promise right in Wonwoo’s face. He felt the warm breaths of air on his blazing cheeks and his mind was swimming foolishly at the warmth radiating off the strong arms. The arms that were currently caging him into his own chair in his own office.

He turned to his right, his frantic eyes looking everywhere except the one place where they really wanted to settle.

Mingyu’s handsome face, he looked crazily hot like this, all serious and protective. Wonwoo couldn’t help but look forward to “soon” when he’ll be able to see more of this Mingyu.

And just like that he backed off and calmly sauntered out of the office, Wonwoo would be lying if he said he didn’t want Mingyu back in his personal space right now. He wasn’t even shocked at his inappropriate thoughts anymore.

He’s reached a conclusion, finally.

 

 

Jeon Wonwoo could now admit that Soonyoung was right. He was in “like” with Kim Mingyu.

He was expecting an overwhelming surge of emotion and turmoil to ensue after his self-confession but surprisingly, there was nothing. His mind was completely silent, his heart humming contentedly in his chest -almost as if his body already knew this fact.

It felt like old news, like his heart and mind had already freaked out about this, then come to terms with it and later accepted it. All without bothering to include Wonwoo into the process.

Or maybe it was him that rejected the idea of thinking about Mingyu like that. Made it so that he didn’t allow himself the opportunity to consider him in that light. Therefore, finding it laughable when others made the suggestion.

That sounded about right, but now this opened the flood gates -Changing the flow of their entire dynamic.

Wonwoo liked Mingyu.

And he was strangely looking forward to finding out what that entailed, instead of dreading it for once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was a long chapter, I should be updating again soon.  
> Let me know how it's going so far.
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> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	11. Chapter 11

Wonwoo only planned to stay until the 8pm stated in his contract then go home.

He was feeling incredibly tired, due to the lack of sleep. He should’ve known to take the rest of the day off when he began craving caffeine, that was usually a sign that his body couldn’t support him for much longer.

But he was a trooper and it was already almost 7pm. Surely, he could power through one more hour of work.

Apparently, his body couldn’t though.

He was lightly shaken awake, the lack of the usual background sounds told him it was probably late.

Judging by the beat of his heart and the rising temperature of his body he knew who had woken him.

He sleepily turned to his left and he was right. Smiling in victory at his accurate prediction, he waved at the younger boy, he WAS always much dumber when he woke up from deep sleep.

Mingyu didn’t find the situation worthy of a smile, as he was frowning down at the sleepy boy.

‘Hyung, it’s past midnight. Why are you still here?’

This revelation shocked Wonwoo, -damn, he knew it was late but this was 4 hours after he was meant to leave- but not enough for him to wake up fully.

He lifted his head, swaying a bit as he sat up straighter and continued smiling.

‘Really? Why are you still here then?’

He poked a long skinny finger In Mingyu’s chest, which the younger caught with his own hand.

‘That’s not important, you need to go home’ 

He sounded tired too, the fact that he was here with Wonwoo when he should’ve been resting was very heart-warming.

The older continued to smile until Mingyu turned around and got down on one knee.

Then, Wonwoo’s half asleep and confused brain didn’t have the energy to process the meaning of that.

So he had no idea what the hell was going on. He tilted his head, eyebrows furrowing and lips pursed.

‘What’re you waiting for? Get on.’

Mingyu’s annoyed voice, broke him out of the prison of thoughts. He finally realised what this was.

‘WHAT?! No. You are NOT carrying me.’

‘Why not?’

The younger asked tiredly, turning and sitting cross legged so he could face Wonwoo. Making him feel like a child being told off for being stubborn.

‘Because people are gonna see, I don’t want that’

He mumbled with his arms crossed, most likely resembling a stubborn child with his exaggerated pout.

‘Hyung, did you not hear me? It’s past midnight we’re literally the ONLY ones here.’

‘You are NOT carrying me, and that’s final. I’m a grown man and I walk just fine on my own’

He stood up to prove his point, only for his treacherous knees to buckle. If it weren’t for an amused Mingyu -still sitting on the floor- catching him, he would’ve smacked into the polished wood and hurt himself.

‘NOW, will you let me carry you?’

Mingyu bit his lip, humour shining in his dark eyes, as he stood up holding the older by the shoulders to steady him -but Wonwoo heard the innocent giggles the other was trying to hide.

‘FINE.’

He yelled in his face, pushing him away when breathing got a little challenging at the influx of Mingyu’s scent.

After buttoning up his coat and securing his scarf for him, Mingyu bent down again and Wonwoo got on without any qualms this time.

His dignity was already trampled on, he was being treated like a powerless child. And the saddest thing was, he was actually THAT tired that he couldn’t fight him on this. He was only glad that Mingyu was the only one to see him this way.

For some odd reason, he felt like he could trust him.

 

 

The piggyback was surprisingly comfortable, with his arms secured around Mingyu’s neck and the latter’s hands gently holding the back of his thighs. He was feeling nice and warm, he almost dozed off multiple times, his head leaning on a strong shoulder and his face breathing in Mingyu’s invigorating scent as he buried it in his neck.

The ride to the ground floor was silent, only the beeping of the elevator and the sliding of the doors, daring to break it.

The moment Mingyu stepped outside, Wonwoo snuggled closer to his back. The snow was now completely gone but the frigid temperature remained. The icy wind was clipping at his cheeks and he burrowed his nose deeper into Mingyu’s warm neck.

‘Cold?’

Mingyu asked after the other’s incessant wiggling and attempts to get closer, when there was literally no space left between them.

Wonwoo whined in answer and Mingyu chuckled.

‘You’re adorable, hyung’

His sluggish brain chose not to dwell on that statement.

‘Can you walk faster?’ He whinged, shivering slightly.

‘Sure.’

Wonwoo thinks that word was only said to pacify him, because it didn’t feel like Mingyu was going any faster, but they finally made it to his car anyway.

So Wonwoo didn’t complain, he just hopped off and melted into the soft leather.

Just before he fell asleep, he was enveloped by the warmth of another body leaning over his. He cracked one eye open to spy on Mingyu, soon he felt the sturdy polyester webbing going across his chest and a resounding click as he was buckled in.

Mingyu did his seatbelt for him.

That was the epitome of childlike helplessness, so why was Wonwoo loving the attention. Or maybe he was loving the person doing the actions rather than the actions themselves.

 

 

 

He was falling in and out of light slumber, the hum of the heaters and the rhythmic clicking of the indicators serving as a constant reminder that he wasn’t home yet.

He was acutely aware of his rumbling belly, demanding to be fed. But since he couldn’t currently fulfil that request, he chose to disregard it.

The car came to a gradual stop and he heard Mingyu’s retreating voice as he ordered him to ‘stay here’ before he heard the slam of the car door.

He watched Mingyu’s lanky frame as he ran down the sidewalk and turned left, out of Wonwoo’s field of vision. It could’ve been anything between 3 minutes to 30 minutes until Mingyu finally returned with a brown paper bag. His hazy mind couldn’t keep up, he was almost falling asleep again when the warm bag settled into his lap.

The first thing he noticed was the smell, greasy and hearty. The second thing he noticed was the weight, this was a lot of food. One more embarrassingly loud rumble of his stomach later and he was opening his eyes.

Denying himself much needed sleep to avoid dying from starvation. His face instantly brightened up as he read the label and he turned to Mingyu with a goofy smile, hugging the food gently to his chest.

‘I love Burger King.’ He mumbled still half asleep.

‘I’m glad. Eat up, hyung’

Wonwoo didn’t need to be told twice, he tore through the bag with the enthusiasm of a 10-year-old kid on Christmas morning. The first thing he did was grab a single fry and offer it to Mingyu, who accepted it with a surprised smile. The second thing he did was grab a handful of fries and stuff them in his face.

He knew he was hungry when he didn’t even care how greasy his face was or how disgusting he looked -in front of his crush, no less.

He balled up the wrapping paper and took a huge bite out of his cheeseburger. His favourite, he considered upgrading his feelings for Mingyu to the next level, because this was a man after his own heart.

Wonwoo nearly shed a tear of joy as he took his second bite. Then he remembered his manners.

‘Eat with me?’ He offered Mingyu a burger, but the younger shook his head with a smile.

‘It’s for you. I already had dinner.’

 

 

‘You know you can start driving, you don’t HAVE to watch me eat.’

He said after a period of Mingyu watching him eat in silence. He was super glad for the low lighting, it made it easier to conceal his blush.

‘What if I want to?’

His hot cheek was pinched and when he turned to playfully glare at Mingyu, the younger was already looking right at him with a serene expression.

‘Creepy much. Just drive if you’re not eating.’

His words were harsh -savage Wonwoo resurfacing due to the satisfying meal- but his face was the picture of playful teasing and Mingyu seemed to know this already.

He mock-pouted, huffing as he pulled away from the pavement and began the drive to Wonwoo’s apartment.

 

 

Instead of rumbling like the onset of a thunderstorm his belly was now humming in content. He’d finished his meal, feeling slightly more energised and less sleepy.

He busied himself with satisfying his eyes, Mingyu’s side profile was definitely a sight to behold. He could really appreciate the sharp angles of his strong jawline and prominent cheekbones this way. His golden skin always had this ethereal glow that captivated Wonwoo, enticing him to touch and taste the younger.

The length of his thick eyelashes was more obvious from the side as they fluttered gently against his soft-looking skin every time he blinked. His fluffy hair was shining and dewy, giving off an almost wet look even though it was dry.

Wonwoo thought Mingyu had a really pretty face, he wanted an excuse to touch it.

He was so lost in the other’s face that he didn’t notice the car stopped at a red light.

‘So watching you eat is “creepy” but watching me drive isn’t?’

Busted. Oh well, it’s not like he was trying to be discreet anyway. Not least because he was facing Mingyu with his entire body.

If it weren’t for the seatbelt restraining him he’d probably be in the other’s lap by now, what with the way his body naturally gravitated towards him.

They were both looking at each other, staring deeply into the other’s eyes. Mingyu looked happy and Wonwoo felt the same.

‘We’re both creepy, then’

His voice was hushed, afraid he’d break the moment if he was any louder.

The lights turned green before Mingyu could agree and he continued the drive in comfortable silence.

 

 

 

Their gentle voices in conversation should’ve been a sign.  
Their stolen glances and uncontrollable smiling should’ve been a sign.  
The fact that they agreed, creepily staring at the other was normal should’ve been a sign.  
Their consideration and un-awkward closeness should’ve been a sign.

And finally, their ability to do all that after their argument earlier on in the day should’ve been the biggest sign ever.

 

Neither boy noticed the signs though, they were crossing a line -practically bolting over the boundaries and they didn’t even know it.

 

 

 

‘It’s 2am.’

Wonwoo voiced unhelpfully as Mingyu parked the car in the building’s underground parking lot.

‘Oh, you’re right.’

The younger ran his hand over his face tiredly, smiling despite his fatigue. Wonwoo could see the bags under his eyes clearly now, and he concluded they had no place on Mingyu’s handsome face.

‘I don’t think you should drive like this.’

He blurted on impulse, his voice was hushed but Mingyu heard him anyway. It was too late to back out now.

‘What’re you suggesting, hyung?’

Mingyu turned to him, his eyelids almost drooping. That was the final push Wonwoo needed to finally bite the bullet and voice the words at the tip of his tongue.

‘You should stay over.’

There was a brief silence in which Mingyu’s eyes shifted uncertainly between his fingers, the time and Wonwoo’s expectant gaze.

Wonwoo on the other hand, was questioning his life choices. He felt like he might’ve come across too strong, but Mingyu looked so tired and it was all because of him. He couldn’t risk sending him off in this state, for fear of something unpleasant happening.

He wouldn’t forgive himself if something bad were to happen, so he decided he didn’t want to take the risk.

‘If you’re sure...’

Came Mingyu’s hesitant reply, and Wonwoo breathed out in relief.

‘I’m sure. Let’s go.’

 

 

Wonwoo found himself leaning against Mingyu as they waited for the elevator, boarding as soon as the doors opened. The older wasn’t even surprised when Mingyu remembered his floor number and pressed it for him, he just smiled and stepped closer to him -gosh, he was smiling a lot today.

An arm wrapped around him, the hand resting on his upper arm squeezing tightly. He sighed in content, lowering his head on Mingyu’s collarbones as the younger rubbed soothing circles on his arm, while the elevator ascended.

He liked this. He could totally live with this, he could live with HIM.

Inside the apartment, Wonwoo showed Mingyu to the spare room forgoing the tour -he didn’t feel like giving one now.

After apologising for the unused state of the room and cringing at the dust that was beginning to collect in the corners, he fetched some clean sheets and comfortable clothing for his guest.

‘I like my clothes baggy, so they should fit you perfectly’ he explained, handing them to Mingyu who accepted them with a grateful smile.

‘The bathroom is that way, I have spare toothbrushes and towels under the sink so make yourself at home.’

‘Will do. Thank you, hyung. Have a good night.’

‘You too’

They stared at each other after that, a bit awkwardly.

Technically, what should’ve happened is that Wonwoo should’ve walked away and let Mingyu get himself ready for bed. When he realised his flawed social interaction, he chuckled nervously and sheepishly apologised, before clumsily sliding across the warm wooden floors to his bedroom across the hall.

He shut the door without looking back, stripping down to his underwear, throwing on a robe and grabbing some pyjamas, then he was dashing to the bathroom at the end of the hall and locking it. Before robotically going about taking a shower, followed by the rest of his nightly routine.

He fell asleep to the sound of the shower running in the background, his damp hair splayed across the pillows and his body toasty under the covers in his warm room.

His heart was freaking out about having HIM in his home, but that faded away as his mind fell into darkness with the onset of sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: I really don't like Burger King, I'm a KFC typa gurrl.
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> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	12. Chapter 12

He was swaying in and out of consciousness, his room was bathed in sunlight when his squinting eyes finally adjusted to the brightness.

There were muffled noises beyond his closed door, it sounded like a wooden spoon grazing the bottom of a pan. Then, his ears picked up the clinging of metal, like a lid dropping on its pot as the simmering contents almost overflowed.

Someone was cooking in his kitchen, that much was obvious even to his lethargic brain –that same someone was engaged in conversation, stifled laughs and hushed words were followed by intermittent periods of stillness.

He deduced from the pattern of sound and silence that it was probably a phone call, one glance to his bedside table insinuated the possibility that it could be his phone. Could it? he shot up in bed, his body overtaken by fright, his socked feet padded across his carpeted bedroom floor.

He opened his door a crack and suddenly he could hear so much better.

‘…of course.’

Nothing more was required for Wonwoo to recognise the owner of the voice, a delightful scent filled his nostrils, triggering an onslaught of growling from his stomach.

A series of supressed sniggers later, there was silence. Mingyu seemed to be finished with his phone call.

Wonwoo ran as fast as he could to the bathroom locking himself in there, before Mingyu realised he was awake.

The first thing he noticed was the strange scent, it wasn’t unpleasant. Just different, he was used to everything smelling a certain way and now that scent was noticeably altered due to it mingling with that of a new user’s. 

There was a second toothbrush in his toothbrush stand, a blue towel he didn’t remember using next to his own purple one.

A quick check in the shower revealed that his toiletries weren’t where he normally placed them. The fact that his apple-scented conditioner was standing upright instead of upside down irked him to the point where he just had to fix it. Immediately.

The thing about showering at night was that it reduced the time it took him to get ready in the morning, which was a blessing since he was always running late in the mornings. All he had to do was wash and moisturise his face, after brushing his teeth.

That was it.

Sometimes, he styled his hair with a bit of gel, if he wanted it out of his face for the day. But most of the time he just allowed it to naturally fall in its silky pattern over his forehead.

On days like today when he desperately wanted to buy as much time, in order to delay having to see Mingyu. It left him with very little to do and he had no choice but to soundlessly slink into the kitchen after only a few minutes. He couldn’t imagine, waking up to HIS voice and seeing THAT face every day –coming to terms with such a thought was laughable and ridiculously impossible.

As he emerged from the hallway he noticed the wall clock next to his fridge, telling him it was just past midday. He couldn’t see much else since his oversized hoodie blocked out his peripheral vision -due to having the hood up over his fuzzy hair. The hem reached mid-thigh length and it was incredibly baggy –thus making it unbelievably comfortable.

Mingyu finally seemed to notice him, an endearingly charming grin took over his sunny face. Wonwoo was stumped for words, he couldn’t even react –He looked so beautiful.

Dressed in HIS clothes –which as Wonwoo predicted fit the other perfectly- with an apron he never felt the need to use and the natural sunlight shimmering on his sun-kissed skin, the younger looked simply breath-taking –and this was him dressed way down.

 

 

His gleaming healthy set of canine-d teeth were on full display, his direct gaze blatantly scanning him from head to toe. The younger snickered discreetly.

‘Hyung, you’re drowning in that.’ 

Wonwoo shied away from the intense eye contact, causing the beaming boy to chuckle. He clapped his sweater paws, the tips of his fingers were barely peeking out the top.

‘It’s comfy.’

He mumbled in defense as he sat at the counter, taking in a deep breath, attempting to discern what was smelling so good.

‘You look cute, I think orange is your colour.’

The younger hummed in appreciation, then quickly turned his back to Wonwoo as he refocused his attention on the food. 

The latter was grateful for that, since his pale cheeks flushed at the compliment.

He belatedly recalled how he couldn’t find his phone and glanced at Mingyu’s back, deliberating whether he should ask him about it.

‘Have you seen my phone? I couldn’t find it in my room.’

He definitely spoke loud enough for his voice to be heard but the lack of response made him doubt the volume he used. Just as he was about to repeat his question, Mingyu finished with breakfast and proceeded to plate everything. So Wonwoo waited until they sat down to eat.

It was a typical Korean home-cooked breakfast, simple yet filling. It’d been so long since Wonwoo ate a meal that tasted of home and was filled with love, so he appreciated it a bit more than he normally would’ve.

Aside from the multiple colourful side dishes, there was a clear broth that looked super nutritious and refreshing, a steaming bowl of fluffy rice and an omelette roll with a ketchup drawn smiley face on the side. It was cute, the extra effort he put in –because he didn’t have to.

They ate in silence, humming in content every now and then. Mingyu was the first to finish, putting his chopsticks down and excusing himself. Wonwoo didn’t hear exactly what the other mumbled because he was still busy eating.

It wasn’t that he normally ate a lot of food, it’s just that he was a notoriously slow eater. In fact, even though Mingyu stopped eating first, he managed to clear 78% of the food on his own. Wonwoo wondered if he even chewed probably or why he wasn’t obese yet.

When he was finally full and satisfied, he rolled up his sleeves and began clearing the mess from breakfast.

He was whistling along to a random tune in his head, washing the last few pieces of cutlery in his spotlessly gleaming kitchen, when Mingyu emerged from the spare room.

He was dressed in his clothes from last night, a white dress shirt and black pants with a grey patterned blazer.

The difference from last night, was the unbuttoned shirt at the top and the slicked back hair, exposing an unblemished golden forehead. As small as the changes were, they managed to elevate his look to the next level –he looked about 749x hotter like this.

Such tiny details, yet it made Wonwoo’s breath hitch and he dropped a chopstick. He quickly recovered though, looking away when Mingyu met his gaze by the doorway -where he was tying up his shoelaces.

He felt like he wanted to ask why Mingyu was leaving so soon. Suddenly feeling sullen, Wonwoo frowned when he realised it was because he didn’t want Mingyu to leave yet.

‘Where you going?’

‘I thought you’d never ask.’

The sarcasm in his tone was very much exaggerated, and Wonwoo gave him a deadpan look. This was apparently funny to Mingyu because he was chuckling, with amusement dancing in his chocolatey eyes.

‘What’s so funny?’ Wonwoo asked with a scowl as he removed the dishwashing gloves and rolled his sleeves over his fingers again.

‘Your face is literally the best thing ever…’

Well, that took the cake as far as unexpected replies went. Wonwoo was torn between taking it as a compliment or criticism, but stopped thinking to listen as Mingyu continued voicing the rest of his speech.

‘So, my cousin’s getting married next weekend and we’re getting our tailored suits fitted today. Then we’re gonna go around to make sure everything’s running smoothly, venue, cake and all that stuff. It’s gonna be a loooong day, I can FEEL it.’

He stood up, hands in his pockets, looking like a fashion model while directing his sunshine smile at Wonwoo.

‘That’s. Nice.’

Wonwoo was finding it hard to focus on forming sentences when Mingyu was observing him this intently, his soft gaze melting his heart and destroying the structural integrity of his insides.

Hence why, he didn’t even realise how robotic and underwhelming his reply sounded until Mingyu pointed it out with a pout.

‘Sorry, I got distracted. It honestly sounds like a really fun time though, much more exciting than what I have planned, anyway.’

He injected as much honesty and rawness as he could into his voice, and he truly meant what he said.

‘Which is absolutely nothing, in case you’re wondering.’

He swiftly tacked on the last sentence, provoking a few endearing chortles from Mingyu.

The younger boy left with a wave and promise of a text later on in the day to update Wonwoo on how everything was going.

When the door beeped shut behind him, he walked back to his bedroom and fell right back to deep sleep. Vaguely, before his eyes drooped shut he recognised the black rectangular object on his bedside table. That was NOT here this morning.

He had no time to think any deeper on the matter, since his brain clocked off for now, shrouding his mind in darkness.

 

 

 

It might’ve been his body trying to make up for the lack of sleep from Friday or his satisfied stomach and relaxed mind that prompted him to sleep for this long.

Or alternatively, just been pure laziness. He’d slept like a rock for the past few hours, when he finally blinked the sleep from his eyes it was 12 minutes past 6pm.

He freshened up in the bathroom, had some leftovers from the morning -damn, that kid could cook- then he started going through some files for work.

A good hour or two of productivity later, his phone began to vibrate. Initially he intended to ignore it since he thought it was only a text. But the phone vibrated for a prolonged period, he realised it was a phone call.

Already annoyed, he launched himself onto his comfortable pillows and put the phone to his ear -he didn’t even check the caller ID.

‘Hello...’

Most people would be offended if they were greeted with such a lacklustre tone.

However, Soonyoung was the definition of optimism and making the best of a bad situation was his area of expertise. That and needlessly meddling in other people’s business -so he greeted with enough enthusiasm for the both of them.

‘GOOOD EVENING. My favourite human bean, on this ENTIRE planet that we call home. HOW YA DOIN?’

Wonwoo scowled deeply remembering how much he’s suffered because of this idiot.

He also sighed in defeat because he knew better than anyone how simple-minded and innocent his friend was -he truly only had good intentions.

‘Why the fuck are you calling me like I even know you?’

In his heart Wonwoo had already forgiven Soonyoung, but there was no harm in pretending to be mad, right?

‘Won, I’m really sorry. I promise I didn’t mean to mess with your relationships.’

‘I’m tired of your apologies.’

He was trying really hard not to laugh at his dramatic lines, Soonyoung was too busy being sincere to notice that Wonwoo was just trolling.

‘I was just curious because you only ever talk to Jeonghan, Jihoon and me... Mingyu seemed to really like you and I guess I wanted to know if he was good enough for my bestie. I realise it wasn’t my place to do that and I’m sorry.’

The sincerity in his apologetic tone was undeniable, he felt a lump forming in his throat -so he changed the subject, but only slightly.

‘So what’s your verdict?’

The moment he asked, he realised he was actually curious to know.

‘Ve-verdict? Wha-‘

Wonwoo cut him off, he forgot Soonyoung wasn’t the brightest bulb in the box -he’d have to spell it out.

‘Mingyu. Is he good enough for your bestie? You said that’s what you were tryna figure out.’

‘Oh... OHHHHHHHH. HELL YEAH! I SHIP IT. When’s the wedding?’

Wonwoo got unreasonably excited at Soonyoung’s reply. But he had to remain calm, one hyperactive kid was more than enough.

‘Be serious please.’

He tried to sound irritated, but again Soonyoung continued being his happy self.

‘I AM being serious, Wonwon. Listen, I think you guys should get married, even if you’re “just friends” for now. Which is bullshit BECAUSE he likes you and you definitely like him’

Why was it that from the very beginning Soonyoung could see this, but HE couldn’t -especially since it concerned his OWN feelings. It made him wonder how he’d been acting recently to give off that impression.

‘How can you be so sure I like him?’

‘YOU DO THOUGH’

Came his friend’s instant reply, Wonwoo grimaced at the volume. He mentally prepared his eardrum for more abuse, Soonyoung was loud.

‘I know, but I’ve only JUST come to terms with it. Yet you’ve been saying I like him since the first time I spoke to you about him.’

‘I think you’re forgetting how long we’ve been besties. I know how you get Jeon Wonwoo, you REALLY like this one.’

Soonyoung spoke in an all too knowing tone. He KNOWS how Wonwoo got -what was that supposed to mean? Did he suddenly grow a tail or horns when he liked someone, that’s how obvious Soonyoung made it sound.

Wonwoo was sceptical.

‘That. Doesn’t even make any sense.’

‘You can deny it all you want, sweetheart. But I’ll be there on the day you marry him, to laugh at how right I was.’

His tone was teasing, as if he knew something Wonwoo didn’t.

‘Whatever.’

Soonyoung took a deep breath, his voice taking on an uncharacteristic heavy tone. Almost like it was laced with regret.

‘Listen, Wonwoo. I honestly didn’t mean to cause you so much stress. It was dumb of me to pretend to be you, to your future husba-‘

He realised he really didn’t want to hear any more of that.

‘CUT. IT. OUT. I forgive you already, for fucks sake.’

‘OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!!! YOU DO?...’

He removed the phone to rest his ringing right ear and realised the device was heating up, he’d have to end the call soon. When he replaced the phone on his left ear, Soonyoung was still not done with his ear-piercing monologue of gratitude.

‘... OH, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, WONWOO. I COULD KISS YOU RIGH-’

‘Ok, don’t do that. But I have to go now, so I’ll talk to y-’

He cut him off, ready to hang up only to be cut right off -Karma was indeed a bloodthirsty bitch.

‘WAIT!’

‘WHAT?’

He yelled back genuinely annoyed at how loud the other was.

A pause. If Wonwoo strained his ear he could hear some muffled sounds in the background.

‘Jihoon says the other producer likes your lyrics and wants you to write more... tomorrow... at the studio... is it 3? Oh at 3:30pm. MESSAGE DELIVERED.’

‘I don’t understand why he didn’t just text me himself.’

He sighed, wondering why his friends were so weird.

‘Cuz he’s a dumdum, that’s why.’

They chuckled together briefly, then they said their goodbyes and hung up.

He cupped his ear with his left hand, it was hot. His phone was almost burning up too. He went to his recent calls to see how long he’d been on the phone. Just before he clicked on his friend’s name he noticed the second most recent call was with his mum. How strange? He didn’t remember speaking to her.

He ignored it for now.

48 minutes.

According to his phone that’s how long he’s been talking to Soonyoung. No wonder the phone was hot and his ears hurt, he chuckled.

Then he remembered his mum, the fact that he definitely didn’t speak to her was now evident to him, he swiped back.

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Apparently, the call was from this morning at 11:32am.

He did some quick maths, so the clock in the kitchen read 12:03pm when he went for breakfast.

And according to his phone the call lasted 26 minutes, he woke up with his phone missing but it miraculously appeared just before he fell asleep again.

Add to that the fact that he heard HIM on the phone as he woke up and that he ran to the bathroom just as the call ended.

Also, that he spent roughly five minutes in there before walking to the kitchen at 12:03pm...

It all added up and all the signs were pointing towards that ONE possible outcome.

 

 

 

 

Mingyu.

Yet he struggled to come up with a single reason as to why Mingyu had his phone in the first place. Let alone, what business he had talking to his MOTHER for almost half an hour.

It made no sense, he wasn’t even sure he wanted to get an answer from him.

That was just plain weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's 2018, where did last year go?
> 
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> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	13. Chapter 13

The library –for him- was his haven. It has always been a place where his younger self sought refuge from the trials and tribulations of daily life –alone, in a strange city.

A safe place, where he could rest both mentally and physically. His sanctuary which shielded him from the world, offered him respite until he was ready to carry on again.

 

 

Wonwoo wasn’t ever suicidal –thank god for that, he really didn’t want to add that to his long list of issues.

Although, he was aware he could come across as such to others. Those that didn’t really know HIM personally, but he’d learnt over the years that their opinions didn’t really matter and stopped hearing them.

He was just a sluggish person, who also wore-out easily –both physically and psychologically. His mental state often weakened as he tended to overwork himself, due to his perfectionist trait.

Nonetheless, he knew how to look after himself well enough. If he was feeling physically exhausted, he’d take the day off and pamper himself with a long bath bomb soak, then he’d eat and drink warm things.

After he slept well enough, the signs of fatigue would be gone, he’d be full of life and energy again.

He might’ve overestimated his tolerance on a few occasions and gotten hospitalised as a result, but those times were very rare and often happened when he was under astronomical levels of pressure and unfathomable stress.

That’s when his hatred towards failure forced him to refuse losing –even if it meant suffering, for now.

And he ended up subjecting himself to more than his body could bear. He liked to believe he was getting better at reading the signs of physical exhaustion by now and he was always up and running after some brief TLC.

 

 

It was slightly more difficult when the exhaustion was psychological, for a time he didn’t know how to deal with it at all and he just let it rule his life.

He’d become irrationally irritant and hopelessly depressed, not knowing what to do with himself or how to get better.

The hardest, darkest times of his life were when his pillowcase was hardly ever dry of his tears and the panic attacks were more frequent than the number of times he ventured outside his dorm room.

That’s when he started frequenting his campus library.

 

 

  
Whenever he became overwhelmed with the fast pace of life, when he needed to slow down for a bit, take a rest and recharge before re-joining the highway of life. He’d go the library.

Wonwoo slowed down and rested his weak mind through his books, through reading, through exploring the lives of fictional characters and predicting their choices and futures. He loved the idea of knowing the fate of those characters so much, that he’d began writing his own stories when he was in university.

The ability to dictate someone’s entire story, steer them in the direction of their future with the tapping of his fingertips on a keyboard or the ink flowing through the tips of his drying pens. He was in control of all that, his words on the page that had the power to move people, to influence their emotions. Wonwoo really loved being able to do that.

So, when he began writing all those years ago, he never once looked back.

Soon however, he realised that words on a page had no monetary value in a world that was saturated with amateur writers –like himself. Thus, writing became less of a priority as he chased financial stability.

That, was pretty much how he ended up working at Pledis Inc. –a book publishing agency.

Because even though, he couldn’t give people joy through his own works at least he could help a more fortunate author achieve that dream. The job also allowed him to receive the joy of books through reading multiple drafts daily.

He’d found a way to mesh his hobby, his dream and make money while he’s at it.

Therefore, he was currently more than content with his life, much happier than his troubled and confused college-self –that’s for sure.

 

 

 

 

 

  
That was years ago, those bleak times were but distant memories now. So far detached from his reality that they felt like a hazy dream rather than the past sometimes.

Wonwoo was much older now, more mature and in control of his emotions rather than the other way around.

He didn’t have panic attacks any more.

He didn’t cry himself to sleep when life got hard any more.

He knew what to do now.

Now, he knew how to deal with his psychological stress.

He still hated losing and failure was never an option. But at least now, he knew his limits and was cautious not to damage his fragile mental state while he pursued success in life.

Jeon Wonwoo had come a long way and he was proud of himself. The fact that he smiled so much more these days was a testament to how much happier he was as a person.

Although, a small voice in his head told him that his recent happiness was caused by other variables.

Mainly, a tall, tanned, tender-hearted variable.

He smiled at the thought of the other boy, as strange as Kim Mingyu was. There was no doubt, that he made Wonwoo happy. He also made him feel other things that weren’t entirely unwelcome but they were foreign and exciting.

He wasn’t sure he was ready to get to know them yet, so he pushed them aside and focused his attention back on his current reading.

Wonwoo might have come a long way in the mental milestone sense, but he certainly didn’t come a long way to his local library. Where he was currently seated in his favourite position by the big window, finally reading the mysterious novel that he’d found at the bookstore.

The library was a very old building, it was a conversion of a five-thousand-year-old palace into a public library. It was ancient and the clash of eras made it an interesting place to read.

The centre of integration where the past meets the present. There were parts of the building such as the exterior and certain pillars, art and wall details that were kept unchanged.

The rest of the interior was modern and sleek, with all the amenities of the 21st century. Such as a super-fast internet connection, the latest technology in terms of computers as well as laptops and tablets that the library loaned its members for a given number of hours.

There was also a plethora of choice when it came to CDs and DVDs that were available for lending at no extra cost.

And every corner was filled with a wide variety of books.

Everything from novels, collections of short stories, poetry and plays as well as encyclopaedias, textbooks, instruction manuals and cookbooks. Resources dating back centuries and popular fiction novels of the current year could be found all in the same place.

On the inside, it was just one big space, divided by gigantic bookcases and rows of comfortable desks, armchairs and sofas, adding to the aesthetically pleasing décor.

Wonwoo knew no place where the old weaved itself so seamlessly with the new, as it did here. He was intrigued from the first time he stepped foot into the converted palace –And he remained intrigued to this day. Wonwoo thought himself lucky to be living a mere 15-minute walk or a 5-miunte bus ride away from such a magical place.

 

 

 

 

He adjusted his position, leaning more comfortably against the padded wall and stretching his long legs across the span of the window. The padded window seat wasn’t made of the softest material -it was quite tough and covered by a swampy shade of green leather. Thus, it wasn’t the most comfortable nor the most attractive seating choice.

But Wonwoo’s love for the quiet corner was due to the beautiful stretches of green scenery beyond the clear, glass ceiling-to-almost-floor window. It made for an amazing backdrop to his novels, resting and soothing his eyes with its natural beauty.

Sadly tonight, it was pitch dark outside, the world covered in a silent blanket of black.

The buses were no longer running this late at night –or rather early morning, so he had no choice but to trek in the freezing cold.

All the way to his apartment.

A whole 15 minutes away.

Wonwoo was NOT happy about this.

 

 

 

 

Earlier that evening when he made the split-second decision to go to the library, it was already late. He’d arrived at the library at roughly 8:30pm and it had been dark for a few hours before then.

Therefore, he had a good excuse for overextending his stay at the library –two good reasons, actually.

The first was that it was pitch dark outside –like he’d already mentioned- so there was no way for him to possibly gauge how long he’d been sat at his favourite window seat.

The second excuse was that the book was super addictive. One of those novels that with every chapter read, the desire to read the next one only grew. Until the readers found themselves at the bittersweet conclusion that was both simultaneously satisfying and insufficient.

The kind of book that made one jump for joy when they realised it had a sequel but also the kind of book that was underappreciated to the point, where there was no paperback copy of it available anywhere.

 

 

 

 

 

He’d searched it up on his computer the moment he woke up the following afternoon. Apparently, there was only 10 copies of the sequel that were ever made, most given away as gifts to the author’s family and close friends.

Upon further research, he learnt that the author who went anonymously by their initials of “J.H.”, was very good at keeping their identity a secret. He’d stumbled across a small online community who loved the series and it intrigued him. It was interesting how very little was known about the mysterious author.

Nothing at all, in fact there was a lot of speculation on their gender and even nationality.

THIS, was all he managed to deduce from hours of searching the dusty corners of the internet.

J.H. could be male or female.

They could be Korean or foreign.

And the most upsetting fact, no one knew where Wonwoo could get a copy of the sequel.

 

 

 

As he was wallowing in agony trying to come to terms with the fact that he’ll never know the fate of the main characters. An ill-timed notification pop-ed up on the top right corner of the screen of his MacBook Pro, reminding him that he had a real-life issue to deal with.

The fiction could wait, for now.

He was never more grateful for Apple products and their sync-ing features. His phone had been on airplane mode the past day because the vibrating was getting on his nerves and distracting him from his tasks. So, if the alarm he’d set on his phone for the studio meeting hadn’t sync-ed with his laptop, he’d be dealing with one very grumpy Jihoon.

Wonwoo will tell you, that wasn’t the most pleasant of Jihoons.

So, he was grateful for the reminder. As he dressed himself warmly in all black, he made sure all the lights were off and windows closed before he made the 10-minute walk to the subway station.

The air was chilly and a certain degree of frost lingered in the mid-December weather. Unfortunately though, it didn’t seem like it would be snowing again this year. Such a shame really, he liked snow.

He walked past the local highroad with its grocery and department stores, small businesses that offered useful services, like the pizza shop, laundromat and meat butchers.

He blocked out the noise pollution from the main road and the buzzing human activity around him. Focusing instead, on the green light of the walking man -that was yet to illuminate, signalling his safe crossing.

 

 

Wonwoo finally made it to his platform on the underground station, jumping in the carriage at the final second and taking up an empty corner seat just before the doors shut behind him.

A few people gave him looks, he sighed in relief –that was close.

Just as he caught his breath and began to relax into his seat, an ancient looking man boarded his carriage. He was wobbling unsteadily despite his walking stick, even before the train began moving. A quick glance around alerted him to the fact that there were no more available seats, everyone else seemed to be avoiding the old man –that way they could save face by claiming they didn’t see him.

Wonwoo stood up, catching the old man’s gaze and motioning to his recently vacated seat with a small smile. The old man’s wrinkled face lit up with gratitude and delight as he wobbled dangerously towards the seat, when the train jolted to a start.

Wonwoo was quick to steady the old man and help him into the seat, for which the elder thanked him profusely while holding onto his hand.

He kept talking to Wonwoo throughout the ride, but the deafening blare of sound made it impossible for him to catch what the elderly man was saying.

Whenever the train came to a halt at a new station however, he was able to appreciate the stories of the man’s youth. Wonwoo would’ve loved to hear the full autobiography more clearly but it wasn’t a feasible idea due to the noise level of underground trains.

When the train came up to his stop, he bowed his head respectfully to the senior with a polite smile and stepped onto the platform.

As he meandered his way to the escalators, avoiding collisions with the rushing commuters he hoped someone would help the old man get off the train safely.

 

 

 

Once he was over-ground again, he expertly navigated through the busy streets. His footsteps slowed down just around the corner from the studio, there on the opposite side of the main road was the site of a traffic accident.

Judging by the absence of smoke and lack of interest from passers-by, the crash took place at least a few hours ago –six, maybe seven. A few police officers in uniform and a bus with the front smashed in was all that remained. His heart ached, thinking that someone might’ve lost their life. Horrific scenes, such as the one before him, were precisely the reason he never bothered learning to drive. That and his inherent laziness. 

Wonwoo finally tore his eyes away from the scene and entered the studio. He greeted the middle-aged woman at the desk politely and she recognised him, due to his frequent visits in the past. The security then, immediately granted him access.

The refurbished building consisted of a ground floor, first floor and basement level. The walls were painted an off-white colour and the hallways were all white marbled floors and sparkling clean, he took the stairs to the first floor where Jihoon’s studio was located.

Standing in front of the closed door, he knocked –just in case his friend was with someone or in the middle of something important.

He couldn’t hear a thing from his position outside the door, since the room was completely soundproofed.

So, he was excused for being a bit jumpy when the door suddenly opened and a tiny, annoyed Jihoon sent him a tired frown.

‘You’re late, Wonwoo.’

‘Sorry, I kinda got distracted on the way.’

Not a complete lie, it was a half-truth. He didn’t think Jihoon would understand the importance of sequels to good novels.

‘Come in and close the door behind you.’

He followed the instructions, noticing a mint-haired guy bopping his head to a beat, which Wonwoo couldn’t hear since the other was wearing headphones –was he the “other” producer, Soonyoung was referring to?

‘Was it the accident?’

Jihoon asked, as he sat down on the wheel-y chair next to mint-head.

‘Yeah…’

Wonwoo took a seat on the nearby leather couch, after he breathed his sullen answer.

‘Terrible, wasn’t it? it’s all over the news, instantly fatal collision they called it.’

Mint-head said as he let his headphones hang around his neck, joining in their conversation, with the deep rumble of his voice.

‘Apparently, it was a drunk driver who hit the bus.’

Jihoon supplied helpfully, he might’ve been upset about the event but it was hard to tell –he always looked like this, grumpy and detached.

‘Wait, so who died?’

Wonwoo spoke for the first time since sitting down.

‘Bus driver did.’

The mint-haired boy chuckled, shaking his head. Wonwoo didn’t understand what was funny about an innocent bus driver dying, when the drunk driver was the one to blame.

‘That’s. hardly fair…’

Wonwoo trailed off, before mint-head replied. Quite bluntly.

‘Nah kid. That’s. Life.’

True.

How could he forget?

Life was cruel, it was never fair. He still didn’t understand why the innocent had to suffer though. That wasn’t justified, and it wasn’t just life that was cruel to people. People were cruel to people too.

Sometimes, completely inconsiderate assholes who didn’t value human life were the cause –thus devastating the life of a fellow human. That drunk driver would have to be held accountable and punished accordingly.

His thoughts were interrupted by the thunderous clap of Jihoon’s small hands, both boys turned to him.

‘Hyung, meet Jeon Wonwoo. He’s a close friend of mine and a great lyricist. Wonwoo, this is Suga-hyung. One of the top producers in the country, he liked your lyrics and wants to work with you.’

After the two shared brief greetings and a firm handshake, they got straight down to business. No dilly-dallying or small talk.

 

Wonwoo could live with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a REEEEEEALLY hard time writing the dark parts of this chapter, t'was sad.  
> I read it again today & I was like T-T
> 
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> It should all be rainbows & sunshine from now on... hopefully.
> 
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> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	14. Chapter 14

It felt like an eternity spent in silence. But realistically, Wonwoo knew it couldn’t have been more than a few hours. Nevertheless, he was getting tired, his pen only meeting the paper to doodle as his inspiration ran dry.

 

After discussing and agreeing on the concept and key themes for the song. It was up to Wonwoo to get it all down on paper, in a tasteful manner. One that would appeal to the two equally grumpy producers in the room -he would’ve thought it was the job that made them that way.

That’s if he hadn’t known Jihoon since childhood, his friend was ALWAYS grumpy. Suga -the other producer- although, older and taller than his friend had an uncanny resemblance to Jihoon.

 

The straight set of their eyes, rarity of words and smiles, small round pale faces and even the pattern of their tapping feet.

 

Those wore all things the two had in common. It was quite entertaining for Wonwoo to watch, it looked like they could easily pass as brothers. He smiled secretly at the coincidence, what were the odds that they’d be working in the same studio.

 

Then he inwardly flinched at the sudden loud pounding on the closed door of the studio. Jihoon mumbled curses under his breath as he stomped over and yanked the door open. An instant shrill noise filled the previously silent room, it was Soonyoung.

 

‘HEYYYYY GUYS. I come in peace, bearing gifts.’

The obnoxiously loud boy beamed, holding up the coffee carrier that contained three takeaway cups. Wonwoo didn’t like coffee, he didn’t hide his distaste for the bitter beverage either.

 

Scowling and scrunching his face in disgust as Soonyoung handed the producers their drinks.

 

‘What’s up with your face?’

Rude. But this was the happiest he’d seen Suga all afternoon, a quick glance to Jihoon told him the same was true for the smaller producer. Who knew that coffee was all it took to placate them? They really were alike.

 

‘HYUNG!....’

Suga shot Soonyoung a deathly glare, Wonwoo didn’t blame him -the redhead was way too loud.

‘Sorry. You see, Wonwoo doesn’t like coffee, that’s why he’s making the ugly face.’

 

The oldest turned to him with a questioning look, a bit of a judgemental undertone to his voice.

 

‘You don’t like coffee?’

Wonwoo nodded.

 

‘That’s... weird. Never met one of those.’

One of those? Wonwoo stopped himself from replying with something sarcastic. He had a feeling Suga was naturally brash and rudely blunt in his speech, he didn’t think he was deliberately trying to pick a fight with Wonwoo.

 

But it sure sounded that way, it took the younger a great deal of self-control to bite his tongue on this occasion.

 

‘BUT FEAR NOT. As your bestie, you know I gotch yo back. I GOT YOU HOT CHOCOLATE.’

It never failed to intrigue Wonwoo how happy and energetic his friend was, even when the mood was sombre -he’d still be that one kid who never lost his childlike smile. As much as it was annoying, he had to admit it was quite admirable.

Wonwoo accepted the warm cup with a small smile and a quiet “thanks”. Then, Jihoon allowed Soonyoung to stay, as long as he didn’t breathe a single word.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

With the help of his sweet drink, he tried to focus on stringing his words together for the next set of lyrics. Although, he wrote it all down on paper, he felt like he could do a better job with the arrangements.

As he went through the melody in his head, he began moving and changing some words around. After another 40 minutes or so, his lyrics were much more natural sounding and fluid. That’ll have to do for now.

 

He stretched, leaning back into the sofa. 

He bit back a laugh at the constantly fidgeting redhead by his side, he was surprised his friend managed being silent for this long.

 

It was an alien concept to be sat next to Kwon Soonyoung for 40 minutes and NOT hear his loud babbling.

 

Then Wonwoo noticed the black IPhone in Soonyoung’s hands -the redhead’s phone was pink. Upon closer inspection, he noticed that his friend was engaged in a battle with fruit. But the thing that really caught his attention -more than the high score, which was impressive- was a crack on the top left corner, eerily similar to the one on HIS phone.

He patted down his own pockets discreetly and sighed in frustration. When the hell did he pickpocket his phone? And why? When he had his own phone to mess around with.

 

Wonwoo must’ve been feeling generous today, because he simply turned away and let him be. He handed the notebook over to Jihoon and excused himself to the bathroom -not wanting to be present for the evaluation.

 

Staring at himself wasn’t something Wonwoo did often. He knew he was good looking but he wasn’t vain like that.

With that being said, this toilet had some very flattering lighting and he couldn’t help but admire the reflection of his God-given features.

The bags were hardly present under his eyes and his cheeks were looking fuller -two signs that reflected positively on his health.

He smiled -glad, as he moved his fringe away from his eyes.

 

He COULD do with a haircut but he kind of liked the longer hair. It allowed him to recreate his emo fringe from high school -which was always funny.

 

Once he was done washing his hands, he dried them with a paper towel and exited the men’s room. He was greeted with a stressed looking Soonyoung who began vomiting words at him the moment he stepped into the hallway.

He grabbed the shorter by the shoulders and shook him lightly, to get him to shut up. It worked. The redhead fell silent and met his gaze.

 

‘Slow. Down. You’re talking too fast.’

 

‘He called andIfreakedthefudgeoutandhunguponhiman-OHMYGAAADhekeepstextingyounow. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.’

 

Typical Soonyoung. He starts off normal then talks way too fast, that his words get jumbled and impossible to understand. Oh, and he randomly starts yelling too.

Wonwoo pinched the bridge of his nose to calm himself down, it wasn’t easy dealing with a stressed Soonyoung.

 

‘Who called?

 

He tried calmly.

 

‘MINGYU.’

 

Came his friend’s frantic shout.

 

‘So?’

Why was Soonyoung freaking out, people called people, it was normal.

 

‘What do you mean “so”? HE CALLED YOU AND I HUNG UP ON HIM’

 

‘Oh.’

Wonwoo’s face was blank as was his mind, he STILL didn’t get why Soonyoung was over-reacting.

 

‘Didn’t you hear ANYTHING I JUST SAID?’

 

‘You talk too fast and too loud. So no, I did NOT hear anything you said. Repeat it more calmly for me?’

 

The redhead took a deep breath, recollecting his limited sanity.

‘Mingyu called. I freaked out and hung up the call. He texted asking why you hung up. AND HE WON’T STOP. EVEN NOW THE STUPID THING IS VIBRATING, TAKE IT.’

He thrust the device into Wonwoo’s chest before storming off, thankfully he had quick reflexes and managed to catch it before it hit the marble at his feet.

 

True to his friend’s words, the phone was vibrating with incoming messages and now a phone call too. Wonwoo wondered Why Mingyu was being so persistent as he hung up the call.

 

He was going to ignore it for now and call him when he got home, but the latest message caught his attention and he instantly began typing a reply.

 

 

**-hyung, are you avoiding me?**

**19:26pm**

**-why do you keep hanging up on me?**

**-did I do something wrong?**

**19:27pm**

**-NO, I’m not avoiding you.**

**-AND NO, you did NOT do anything wrong.**

**-Whatever the fuck gave you that dumb idea?**

**19:28pm**

**-I’ve been trying to call you since yesterday but my calls wouldn’t go through**

**-I texted you at least a billion times and got no reply**

**-I call you today and you hang up on me**

**-TWICE**

**-I text you like crazy again and I can see you’ve read them but you DON’T reply.**

**-Now ask yourself what gave me that idea.**

**19:32pm**

 

Wonwoo’s heart painfully squeezed as he read each oncoming text. Small tears appearing on the surface of the throbbing muscle with every vibration of his phone. The thing was on airplane mode yesterday but that would sound too much like an excuse. His fingers hovered over the keyboard unsure how to fix this.

 

He was in the wrong, he knew that.

But it WAS a misunderstanding and he didn’t know how to clear the air. Apologising would probably be the best option.

 

**-Sorry.**

**19:37pm**

**-what do you mean, hyung?**

**-sorry you hung on me?**

**-sorry you ignored me?**

**-sorry you had me worried sick?**

**-sorry WHAT?**

**-if you’re gonna apologise for something, then do it properly**

**-or tell me you don’t care and I’ll fuck off for you**

**19:39pm**

 

Wow, his eyes widened at the anger and passion in those words. He hadn’t realised he was significant enough to Mingyu to elicit such a strong reaction.

 

**-Stop being dramatic.**

**-It’s a simple misunderstanding, I’ll explain tomorrow.**

**19:40pm**

**-don’t tell me what to do**

**-I don’t care if it was a misunderstanding or deliberate**

**-I’m still upset**

**-and call me now**

**-if you don’t, I’m not talking to you tomorrow.**

**19:42pm**

**-For real?**

**19:43pm**

**-I’M SERIOUS**

**-stop treating it like a joke**

**19:43pm**

**-I can’t call now.**

**19:44pm**

**-FINE, I see how it is**

**19:45pm**

**-Mingyu, calm the fuck down, I wasn’t finished.**

**-I can’t call you NOW but I can in an hour.**

**-Wait for me?**

**19:46pm**

**-ok**

**19:50pm**

 

His thundering heart slowed down after he finally got the younger’s reply. He realised how it appeared from the other’s perspective. It was easy to misunderstand his actions as him avoiding or ignoring -but he literally had no reason to do that, he was “in like” with him for goodness sake. But Mingyu didn’t know that, so he was entitled to his reaction.

 

**-Sorry, Jihoon.**

**-Something urgent came up and I have to go.**

**19:51pm**

 

He was already speed-walking to the station when Jihoon replied.

 

**-What is it for?**

**19:52pm**

 

Dammit, he couldn’t tell him the truth -it would sound silly. So, he told a white lie.

 

**-Work.**

**19:54pm**

**-I don’t really care.**

**19:54pm**

**-Tell Soonyoung And Suga-hyung, “sorry” for me.**

**19:55pm**

**-Whatever.**

**-Just be careful, I don’t wanna dead best friend.**

**19:57pm**

 

He smiled at Jihoon’s tsundere display of consideration, before shoving his phone in his pocket and descending into the underground.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The journey went by in an uneventful blur, probably because he was in his head most of the time. Mingyu’s behaviour was strange and he was having a hard time trying to analyse it.

Sure, they were friends and friends worried about one another, but he couldn’t help feeling like his concern was a bit excessive. Not least, because It’s been barely a day since they’d shared breakfast. In other words, way too early to freak out about a spell of radio-silence.

People could switch their phones off for various reasons, they could genuinely be busy and even the closest of friends sometimes went a couple days without contact. So as hard as he tried to make sense of Mingyu’s reaction, he couldn’t. At least not in the realm of plain friendship.

That’s when he stopped himself, he was approaching dangerous territory. His heart picked up speed and he felt a little faint, he wasn’t ready to broach that topic yet.

 

The time on his phone read 20:42pm, as he toe-d his trainers off and got rid of the warm layers. It hasn’t been an hour yet so he decided to take a quick shower to rinse away some of this tension. 

He brushed his teeth and changed into his comfortable clothes –AKA, oversized hoodie, fluffy socks and sweatpants. They were all black tonight, reflecting his solemn mood.

 

By the time he settled into bed with his phone it was 21:17pm, he’d taken longer than planned in the shower. But he hoped Mingyu wouldn’t mind too much.

 

After little deliberation, he pulled up his contact and pressed call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a cliff hanger cuz I'm E-vel.  
> I'll update again tomorrow.
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	15. Chapter 15

The receiver crackled and Mingyu’s drowsy voice filled his ear, after just two rings.

‘Wonwoo hyung?...’

His chest fluttered unreasonably at the way Mingyu said his name, he rarely got to hear it in that sweet velvety voice. 

‘Speaking...’

He fought back a yawn as he mumbled into his phone.

‘HYUNG, do you not like me?’

 

 

Well, that came out of nowhere. His mind blanked at the unexpected directness.

‘No?’

His voice sounded higher even to his own ears, he never knew how to answer questions when the syntax was backwards like that. 

‘Why do you sound like you’re guessing, then?’

‘Because you worded the question in a dumb way.’

The younger gasped, Wonwoo could tell he was only pretending to be offended.

‘So, you don’t hate me?’

With the way they interacted, it was obvious neither boy HATED the other. So why did Mingyu’s voice sound so small and uncertain? He hated it, he wanted the confident puppy back.

‘Of course, I don’t hate you, idiot.’

If only Mingyu knew how true that was, he mused in his head.

‘Tell me that you like me then?’

His tone was low and teasing, whispered into his ear like a secret. Wonwoo was thankful that this conversation was happening over the phone and not in person. Because otherwise, the younger would see his flaming face and hear his hyperactive heartbeat. Was he deliberately trying to get Wonwoo flustered? Or was it just him, fangirling again?

‘Fuck you, I’m NOT gonna say that.’

He whisper-yelled, hoping he made his point clear. Mingyu chuckled a little, there was some rustling in the background, Wonwoo gathered from the sound that the younger was also in bed.

 

 

 

‘So, what happened to you over the weekend?’

Finally, they were discussing something relevant.

‘My phone was on airplane mode yesterday.’

Mingyu sounded sceptical as he said.

‘Reeeally? The WHOLE day?’

‘Yes. And I was helping a friend with his work today, so I didn’t have my phone on me.’

‘Yet somehow you hung up when I called you.’

He continued in a suspicious tone, Wonwoo told himself to remain calm and focus on the facts.

‘That was my friend, he was playing games on it and accidently hung up.’

‘The friend you were helping?’

Genuine confusion was mixed in with the sceptical tone now, he hated it. Wonwoo was telling the truth, why wasn’t Mingyu believing it?

 

‘No. Another friend.’

Frustration was eating away at his resolve to be calm, this was hard.

‘What about the second time I called, another accident?’

‘No.’

‘Then. You DID hang up on me?’

‘Kinda.’

He grimaced at his own weak voice, he wanted to be honest but he couldn’t justify why he did that without sounding like a liar or an asshole, or a lying asshole.

 

 

The younger sighed, taking a deep breath, ‘So, what you’re saying is. Your phone was on airplane mode; therefore, my calls wouldn’t go through and you couldn’t see my texts. Then you were busy helping a friend and your other friend hung up on me? Then YOU did the same thing and STILL ignored my texts? But it’s all a misunderstanding?... Is that what you’re tryna tell me?’

Mingyu’s voice was getting more unsure the longer he spoke and Wonwoo was beginning to realise how messed up it sounded, now that he was hearing it from someone else. It WAS the truth though, so he felt wronged.

Wonwoo nodded.

 

 

Internally face-palming when he realised Mingyu couldn’t see him –Thank God for that- then hummed in agreement, not knowing what else to add to make the other believe.

‘Right. You DO realise this whole thing sounds like one shitty excuse, don’t you?’

‘It’s your fucking business if you don’t believe me.’

He snapped at him, tired of the double standards he continued voicing his thoughts.

‘Wasn’t it you that cancelled our lunch on Tuesday and then proceeded to ignore the fuck out of me till Friday?’

Wonwoo was so relieved to be able to finally say that, since the question had been nagging at his sanity all week.

‘If you hadn’t been so difficult when I asked you to eat with me on Friday, then you’d know that on Tuesday I broke my phone and only got it back that Friday morning.’

 

Fudge.

 

Wonwoo closed his eyes and focused on breathing calmly. Now, he sounded like a self-entitled bitch AND his secret was out. Mingyu –now- knew he was thinking about him this whole time. Dammit.

‘WHY ARE YOU ONLY TELLING ME THAT NOW?’

That was the sound of Wonwoo’s composed-front shattering. He was angry that Mingyu withheld such vital information –thus causing him to make a fool out of himself. So, he decided he might as well fully-freak out. Mingyu knew he cared now, so there was no point hiding it anymore.

‘Hyung, do you know how intimidating you get when you’re mad? Not to mention stubborn. YOU wouldn’t listen to me, when I tried.’

Mild static and extended silence. 

 

 

‘Hyung, are you… still there?’

Wonwoo bit his lip, he kept losing today. Mingyu always made sense whereas he ended up sounding like a crazy fool. He had to admit he WAS unapproachably hostile that day, he was surprised that Mingyu stood his ground –most people would be too scared to stick around.

BUT he was only being mean because he thought Mingyu was ignoring him, -now that he knew he wasn’t, he had no excuse. He didn’t want to admit defeat, though.

 

 

‘Hello?...’

If he didn’t speak up now, chances were Mingyu would hang up. He raked his brain for something to say.

‘Can we forget this?’

He murmured, hardly audible. That was the best he could come up with.

He flicked through the events that led them to this situation in his head. Mingyu “ignored” him for a few days, Wonwoo got mad, it turned out to be a misunderstanding. Then, Wonwoo “ignored” Mingyu for a little over a day, –for goodness sake- the younger got mad, it WAS a misunderstanding.

Technically, they were even. So, putting the past behind them is what they SHOULD do.

His voice had been barely above a whisper, yet somehow Mingyu heard him clearly.

‘Oh-Kay?’

The younger didn’t sound convinced, Wonwoo had to convince him to bury this.

 

 

‘Look, we both had our misunderstandings. Not one of us is free of fault, so let’s just forget it. Please.’

He added the last word for emphasis, he was borderline begging now. How pathetic.

‘You’re right, I guess…’

It worked. Wonwoo found it hard to accept it would be that easy, he waited for the punchline.

‘But only under one condition.’

And it came, eventually. Mingyu’s voice was playful, he caught an undertone of mischief. He didn’t like where this was going.

He groaned internally, as he sighed in answer.

‘What?’

‘Tell me you like me.’

 

Wonwoo blanched,

 

The nerve of this rascal, he thought they were over this already. Blood rushed to his cheeks once again, and he felt hot. This was all in a friendly context, right? Right. So why did he feel like Mingyu had an ulterior motive?

‘I’m not doing that, Mingyu’

He tried to sound assertive, but his voice wobbled slightly. He blamed his wildly thrashing heart and the rising temperatures, was he having a heart attack?

‘Then I’m not forgetting it, Wonwoo… So, you thought I abandoned you last week, huh? How cute.’ he cooed.

 

 

Wonwoo had to sit up when he almost choked on his spit. Goosebumps erupted all over his skin and it had nothing to do with the temperature. Call him delusional, but there was no denying the deliberate flirty tone that Mingyu’s voice took on. Was this his life now? Would Mingyu do this in person too? He shivered at the thought, he didn’t want to find out.

A small part of him was protesting his conclusion passionately, as he listened closer to that part of him. He realised just how much he enjoyed the way his name rolled off Mingyu’s tongue, he was jealous of his own name. He wanted Mingyu’s tongue rolling on him, too.

Woah. NOW he understood why that part of his brain had to be supressed, it was insane and Wonwoo was traumatised. He concluded that he wanted Mingyu’s tongue IN mingyu’s mouth and away from him, he had to stop this before it got out of hand. 

He swallowed his pride. He had no choice, this was blackmail and harassment. The only way to stop it, was to give the devil what he wanted. In this case he’d have to admit he “likes” him. 

His thrashing heart went into full spaz-attack mode. Was that sweat collecting at his brow? Shit. This would’ve been so much easier if it weren’t so close to the truth. He had to remind himself that this was a friendly “like” as far as Mingyu was concerned, and Wonwoo would hold on to that fact, unless the younger explicitly stated otherwise. Which he doubts will ever happen, but he didn’t want to be a Debbie-Downer so he held on to a tiny bit of hope.

 

 

Wonwoo cleared his throat, he was ready.

‘I-’

He choked on nothing. Dammit, he was NOT ready. He didn’t care that Mingyu was oblivious to the romantic feelings he harboured for him, because regardless of where Mingyu stood –the feelings were there and they were real. They were screaming at him, his heart was too loud and for a horrifying second, he thought that maybe his feelings for Mingyu had grown TOO much –he wasn’t sure he could handle them if they grew any bigger, it might just consume him.

To him this was basically a confession. He would be indirectly professing his undying lo- like for Mingyu. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t terrified.

‘Say it, Wonwoo.’

Mingyu’s earnest command and lower than usual tone were too intense for Wonwoo, his poor stressed heart was trying to literally break free from behind the bars of his ribcage. He was positively sweating now, he moved the collar of his hoodie to assist better airflow and even began fanning himself when that didn’t work. Why did he have to fall for such an effortlessly hot person, who was also so out of his league? He was so unlucky.

 

 

‘I l-like you’

 

 

Wonwoo had gathered every ounce of courage within his thin body, but he could only manage a whisper of the 3-lettered confession. His entire being was on fire, Wonwoo was burning away but he didn’t care. He felt lighter, because finally, he’d said it –the fact that Mingyu didn’t get it the way Wonwoo meant it was irrelevant.

‘What was that, did you cough orrrr?’

Mingyu’s teasing tone was as evident as daylight, he knew damn well that wasn’t a cough. In fact, Wonwoo was certain the other heard the confession loud and clear. The rascal was just messing with him now, did he think he was some pushover that he could play with?

 

 

‘Say that one more fucking time and I’ll hang up.’

He was surprised at how threateningly composed his voice was, especially after all the abuse his heart had suffered tonight. He was having none of that, not anymore.

‘Oh, look who finally decided to join me. Good to have you back, hyung. I missed your voice and your rudeness.’

Wonwoo was caught off guard –but only for a mili-second, before he composed himself. Was the younger always this brave? Sarcasm was something Wonwoo did, it irked him how much better Mingyu did it. But he had no time to compare whose snarky comments were better, he had a deal waiting to be sealed.

‘Listen here, you sassy rascal. I’ve given you your dumb condition. Now, keep your end of the deal.’

‘I’m a man of my word, hyung. You can consider it all erased, with no backup.’

There was no trace of the previous humour left in his voice, he sounded sober and serious.

‘Promise to never bring it up.’

Wonwoo wasn’t satisfied, he needed a guarantee the younger wouldn’t use the events from this past week to embarrass him in the future.

‘I promise. Trust me, hyung.’

 

 

 

Wonwoo did.

He trusted Mingyu enough to believe his promise.  
Enough to let him sleep in his home.  
Enough to ditch his friends just so he could call him.  
Enough to like him, with a bit more passion than he should.

He trusted the younger with all his heart. It wasn’t even a novel thought, he’d known it all along.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Personally, I like this chapter and I don't often say that about my own work. Because I'm a crappy writer who's only trying. BUT ME LIKEY LIKEY LIKEY THIS ONE.
> 
> I hope ya'll like it too. :)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	16. Chapter 16

Surprisingly, he didn’t feel like death when he stirred into consciousness the next morning, at 6:45am. Feeling confused, he yawned loudly and stretched and his eyebrows furrowed at his suspiciously peaceful heart –he normally woke up with a start, heart racing because he routinely overslept. But oddly, he managed to even beat his alarm by a whole 15-minutes today, despite having stayed up till nearly 1am the previous night. A lopsided grin lifted the corners of his lips when he remembered his long phone call with Mingyu.

Neither boy had noticed how much time was passing, as they whispered to one another into the darkest hours of the night. After Wonwoo got over his multiple Mingyu-induced heart-attacks and they agreed to leave the past in the past, the conversation took on a more light-hearted tone.

They talked about the family wedding the younger would be attending over the weekend and how excited he was to be his cousin’s best man. He told him how the fittings and other preparations were going -all good, thankfully.

They talked about work and fun childhood memories. Wonwoo finally got to set the record straight on his opinion about reading -no thanks to Soonyoung whom had misled the poor boy. He finally had somebody who liked books enough to understand the painful aftermath of knowing a sequel to a good book exists, but being unable to get his hands on it.

And he ranted to his heart’s content.

Mingyu didn’t even question the sudden change of opinion but Wonwoo could tell he wanted to.

 

Then, they talked about their hopes for the future and Mingyu finally hinted that he’d be moving out soon. Although, he didn’t specify where he was going to live when he got around to it.

 

 

 

By the time they ended the call, his phone was effectively drained of battery and he thought he’d put it in the charger before falling asleep. He realised he didn’t, when he checked the uncooperative piece of crap, just before leaving for work.

Only to find that the charger hadn’t gone in the whole way. Thus, it was dangerously running on 17%.

 

But he was running dangerously late to the last bus that’d get him to work on time and therefore, had no time to charge it. In a rare moment of sensibility, he grabbed the charger and shoved it in his bag, next to his lunch.

Then he was out the door and on his way to the bus stop.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He strolled into work 15 minutes later than he should’ve.

The editorial wing fell into silence and the burning gazes on his back were uncomfortably palpable, a discreet glance informed him that they were full-on openly staring at him. He blinked, they didn’t even have the decency to look away or hide it either -entranced, as if they’d seen a ghost.

Wonwoo stopped, fully turning to them with the harshest glare he could manage, in his offended state of disbelief. They really deserved it this time, with the way they paused to rudely gape at him the second he’d walked in.

As usual it fixed them, and they hastily focused back on their work, almost immediately. Although, He had no doubt they’d start whispering about him the moment he closed his office door.

 

What was their problem, anyway? So he was usually the first one to arrive in their department, already deeply engrossed in his work even before the work day officially started. So what? Things happened in life. People COULD be late sometimes.

Wonwoo was irritated. He swears they didn’t even see him as a human being, it’s like he wasn’t allowed to mess up.

 

 

 

A few very productive hours later and the time for lunch rolled around. There wasn’t really a set time for lunch when it came to employees in senior positions -like himself.

 

Basically, he was given the 8am-8pm time frame but apart from a few pre-designated meetings and events, it was up to him to decide his daily schedule, according to his workload.

The rest of the staff however, had a much more strict set of guidelines. Their lunch was between 12:30am-13:45pm, and Wonwoo chose to follow that timing as well. That way he wouldn’t be disturbed in the middle of his meal.

 

 

 

So at 13:00pm he took out his roll of kimbap -that he’d bought from the convenience store a few nights back. He also had an egg sandwich and an apple. It wasn’t anything special but it was an improvement on last time.

He wondered if Mingyu would approve of his meal this time, or if it would fall below his highly-tuned culinary expectations again.

 

After he was done with lunch, he got straight back to work. But because of his exceptionally productive morning he soon ran out of things to do. He was in the middle of doodling in his journal -where he normally jotted down ideas for new stories to write.

Although he was suffering from a particularly bad spell of writer’s block recently. Thus, he hadn’t written much in his ideas journal for a while now.

 

 

That’s when his phone began vibrating as it charged on a little side table to his right.

He stared unblinkingly at the phone long after it stopped vibrating.

 

 

 

Finally deciding he had nothing better to do, he walked over and removed the charger. A healthy 100% greeting him from the right corner of the screen. He smiled focusing on the new text.

 

 

**-meet me at the dining hall**

**15:21pm**

 

Wonwoo blinked once, twice. He was sure now, -no honorific. Mingyu was definitely getting brave with him. But since Wonwoo never really cared for that, he decided to let it slip. Just this once.

 

**-I’ve already had lunch though...**

**15:27pm**

**-then come watch me eat**

**15:28pm**

**-That’s you, Mingyu.**

**-I don’t do that creepy shit, lol.**

**15:28pm**

**-please**

**-I miss your face**

**15:29pm**

**-I’m working.**

**15:29pm**

 

He lied. But he had no business in the cafeteria and he’d rather not face Mingyu when he was sending him flirty texts.

 

**-no, you’re not**

**-you’re texting me**

**15:29pm**

**-I can stop...**

**15:30pm**

**-JUST QUIT PLAYING HARD TO GET AND COME HERE NOW**

**15:32pm**

 

 

He choked, gasping as he re-read the last message. Why was Mingyu flirting with him? -so causally at that. Wonwoo couldn’t even call him out on it, since he was being a subtle bastard about it.

 

 

 

After a whole 30 seconds of careful consideration. He decided to go, I mean why not, right?

Wonwoo left his coat since he’d be staying indoors -wearing just his thin yet warm grey turtleneck sweater, the cuffs stretching past his fingers, and a pair of dark skinny jeans that hugged his slim figure. He was dressed more on the casual side today, not because he couldn’t be bothered but because he forgot to iron his shirts. His lightweight black boots glided almost silently on the floor as he walked to the elevator.

He glanced at the staff -internally scoffing, of course they’d be working. Now that they knew he was watching.

When the elevator arrived, he rode it down to the second floor, where the company dining hall -also known as the origin of cancerous rumours- was located.

 

 

Wonwoo didn’t really fancy going there, it was obnoxiously loud and rarely clean. Which is why he’d hardly been there twice -even though, he’s been working here for over two years.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As he quietly entered the spacious hall, he spotted Mingyu near the windows. The hall seemed fairly clean and it was barely occupied, probably had something to do with it being way past lunch. It didn’t even really bother him that he’d recognised the younger instantly, despite the other having his back to him.

After doing his fair share of admiring, he marched over to the eating boy and dropped himself on the opposite bench, huffing dramatically as he crossed his arms on the table. The wooden surface acted as a barrier, separating their upper bodies. While their feet knocked together under it, Wonwoo scowled to hide his smile.

 

‘Geez. Did you really have to yell at me through text?’

The younger simply nodded, unable to speak through his mouthful of sandwich. He looked like a chipmunk with the way his cheeks were inflated.

It had Wonwoo’s nose scrunching up as he smiled -he didn’t mean to but Mingyu was just adorable.

 

 

Due to his own unusual behaviour, Wonwoo began to question things. What the hell was he doing with his life? Why did he even come down here?

‘Am I just meant to sit here and watch you eat?’, he asked after a short pause, Mingyu nodded again, taking another huge bite.

 

‘That is such an insult to my dignity and self-worth, I have so many better things to do. My ego is wounded’, Wonwoo huffed in mock-offence and the younger snorted ~~un~~ attractively, -because he knew there was nothing else he’d rather do more, than watch Mingyu’s face all day.

The younger picked up one of the three baguettes on his tray, cutting one in half then offering to an unamused Wonwoo. ‘Then eat with me.’ Mingyu purred, fluttering his long lashes.

They both laughed at his attempt to impersonate Wonwoo, -he was only fake-laughing though, pale cheeks flushed- from the other night with the cheeseburgers.

 

‘I already ate though’, he complained, still taking a bite of the sandwich and appreciating the combination of flavours. He didn’t remember the food here being this good, this just gave him incentive to maybe come more often.

 

Wonwoo voiced this opinion, causing Mingyu to almost choke as he laughed with his mouth full of food.

He handed the younger his water bottle with a confused expression and waited for the giggle-fest to pass so the other could explain what he found oh-so-hilarious.

 

‘H-hyung! I MADE these, the food here is still super crap.’, he managed to control his laughing enough to clarify, before he let himself go again.

Wonwoo pouted unintentionally, his cheeks colouring even more in embarrassment, ‘It’s really not that funny, Mingyu... How comes you’re so good at cooking though?’ he propped his cheek on his right hand, leaning closer to the table as he skilfully changed the subject.

 

The younger took a few more minutes to calm down. Then, he sat up straighter and started speaking, his face the picture of nostalgic bliss.

‘Well, my mum’s a professional chef -WAS, since she’s retired now. She’s still an amazing chef, though. Anyway, growing up I was super close with my mum, I always followed her around and hated being away from her, to the point that she used to joke about having two daughters.’

He paused his story to chuckle lightly, then continued with sparkling eyes.

‘So basically, I was always there and I was such a chatterbox asking about this and that, while she cooked... She ended up teaching me some things and I guess I learnt by watching her. I’m still learning, and I have a looong way to go, though. My mum’s tooo good.’

 

Wonwoo was genuinely curious when he’d asked and he listened intently to Mingyu’s explanation. He found the image of a tiny smiley Mingyu, learning how to cook, absolutely adorable.

 

The younger was smiling, reminiscent, as he spoke of his childhood and his mother.

Speaking of mothers, a bell started loudly bonging in his head.

‘You spoke with my mum Saturday morning, didn’t you?’

 

Mingyu swallowed down the last of the third and final sandwich, then he wiped his mouth with a tissue and nodded -looking straight at Wonwoo.

Wonwoo was taken aback, having not expected such a calm reaction. He imagined the younger would be caught off guard and stutter in embarrassment, maybe even apologise.

But he looked so calm, unbothered. So Wonwoo asked,

 

‘Why?’

 

‘Well, it kept ringing while you were fast asleep. I didn’t want it to disrupt you, cuz I knew how tired you were’

Ok, that made sense. It wouldn’t pan out well for Wonwoo to argue with such a logical answer, but-

‘You could’ve just hung up.’

 

Mingyu gaped at Wonwoo, then he leaned in close. Speaking in a hushed voice, careful not to let others overhear.

‘Ok, I know we agreed to leave this in the past, but you really need to get out of your habit of hanging up on people. It’s not nice hyung, makes others feel like they’re being ignored.’

 

The older narrowed his eyes and applied his poker face, pushing Mingyu’s head away with his right index finger. Too close.

‘Don’t. Ever. Mention. That. Again... Bottom line is, you did NOT need to speak with my mum for nearly half an hour, you don’t even know her.’

Fact. Wonwoo praised himself for being rational in his answer when all he wanted to do was scream and shake Mingyu for being such an annoying weirdo -maybe kiss him a few times while he’s at it, too.

‘Wow, I didn’t realise we were talking for that long, she’s such a fun, lovely person. Now I see where you get it from’

He had the audacity to actually WINK at him, as he cradled his own smiling face in his palms.

 

Wonwoo supressed his inner fan girl from crushing all over Mingyu, instead he shot the other a -convincing- disgusted look, thoroughly judging him.

‘Cut the bullshit. You KNOW I’m neither of those things.’

‘You’re right. You can be such a meanie sometimes, but...’ Mingyu paused,

His enchantingly beautiful brown eyes gazing deeply into Wonwoo’s own boring pair. He was weak, enthralled by their beauty he couldn’t look away.

‘I know that deep down inside you’re just a fluffy, sweet, adorable, squishy ball of sunshine!’ he exclaimed childishly.

 

Luckily for Mingyu, Wonwoo didn’t have anything in his mouth at that point, otherwise he would’ve spat it out right in his grinning face. A shame really, it would’ve been a fitting punishment for his cringe-worthy comments.

 

Instead he sent him a scandalised look and began to complain, ‘EWWWW. Not when I’m tryna eat. What the fuck?’

 

‘Sorry, I’ll leave you to it. Enjoy your meal, squishy.’

 

As he watched his towering figure exit the dining hall, he really hoped that name wouldn’t become a thing. He was already mortified at the prospect of having to hear that again, that he didn’t even notice how Mingyu successfully evaded the topic of the phone call with his mother.

 

 

 

Honestly though, -Wonwoo’s already given up, he decided he didn’t care enough to pursue that topic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some people don't think 17% is that low but I freak out when my battery hits 40%, am I the only one?
> 
> Also I don't know what this chapter was & I apologise to the lovely weirdos that actually like this story, I'm just hardly ever satisfied with my writing T-T
> 
> But I love meanie so I'm not giving up on this story, hope ya'll keep reading <3
> 
>  
> 
> ANYWAYZ,
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	17. Chapter 17

He switched off his monitor and stretched in his seat, the sleeves of his thick magenta-purple turtleneck sweater, sliding down his forearms at the movement. He replaced them -absentmindedly- over his palms when he felt sufficiently stretched out.

Due to his love of sweater paws people often misunderstood his intentions. They assumed he was hiding something –a tattoo, birthmark, too much hair. Believe it or not, those were all real questions he got from people.

But he knew exactly what people really wanted to ask, most suspected that maybe he was covering up something darker. Something that most people were ashamed of and thus didn’t want others to see -basically they thought he self-harmed.

To Wonwoo it was a ridiculous idea and a useless concern. Because to him, sweater paws were comfortable, it was something he’d always remembered doing. A habit -and that’s why he always wore his hoodies, sweaters and jumpers this way. The habit started off in childhood, he thought back to all the times his mother bought him clothes. How they’d always hang loosely on him, falling over his palms -due to his naturally skinny, lanky frame.

And since rolling them up was tedious work, young Wonwoo decided to let the fabric hang in its natural state -he didn’t need his hands out ALL the time anyway.

Now that he was older, he still had them because they kept his hands warm in the winter and he felt more comfortable being less exposed.

 

 

 

 

It was 1:26pm on a Thursday, the locked screen of his phone told him it was already the 21st of the month. It shocked him how fast time went by, he shook his head in disbelief when he realised the year was ending in only 10 days.

He was however, looking forward to going back home for the holidays, he’d missed his family and the excitement to go back was very real.

Wonwoo tapped his foot, impatient.

The time was now 1:32pm and he had yet to receive any new messages.

 

His group of friends usually met up the week before Christmas to hang out one last time and catch up on life. They’d agreed to do that today and Soonyoung promised to text him the details of where and when it was happening, by lunchtime.

In other words, he should’ve known by now. He was getting restless, his foot tapping incessantly because he needed to know before Mingyu arrived, so he could tell him he didn’t need a ride home today.

Getting a drive home from Mingyu was customary now as was sharing lunch with him. In both cases the younger insisted it wasn’t a problem, citing that he usually drove through Wonwoo’s neighbourhood on his own way home and that he typically made more food than he ate anyway so, he wanted to share with him.

Mingyu himself, became part of the norm for Wonwoo and they saw one another multiple times daily following that day in the cafeteria. And thus, the other boy was now an integral constant in his daily schedule.

They usually had lunch whenever Mingyu showed up around 1:30pm-ish. The boys would chat amicably about random things, sometimes they’d discuss work-related issues or talk about how their days went. Other times they’d share their inner thoughts and feelings about more serious real-life situations or they’d simply eat in comfortable silence.

 

One thing that always remained a constant during their shared lunches however, was the quality and impeccable taste of the food.

Mingyu really was a super talented chef -at least in Wonwoo’s opinion. The lunches he packed not only varied in types but also flavours, from Japanese to Italian and even French cuisine. There wasn’t a dish he could think of that he didn’t eat with Mingyu. Although, that probably had something to do with the fact that his knowledge of foodstuffs, didn’t extend beyond what they sold in his local convenience store. Therefore, his opinions might’ve been a tad biased.

He didn’t care though, he knew he’d rather eat Mingyu’s cooking, in place of convenience store food any day.

 

Speak of the devil, soft knocking sounded from the door at that moment, he smiled despite himself -was it weird that he could tell it was Mingyu by the knock pattern? Probably. Did he care? Nope.

‘Come in.’

He hollered pleasantly, his mouth already watering in expectation. Not at seeing Mingyu but at the prospect of delicious food... of course.

Mingyu closed the door behind him, smiling in greeting as he walked over to the seating area in the corner of Wonwoo’s office. He proceeded to unpack and spread the food on the glass coffee table.

Sometimes Wonwoo helped with this part, but most times he admired the younger’s work from a distance. Appreciating the way his eyebrows furrowed and a small pout formed as a result of his concentration.

He was wearing a fitted black suit today, dressed down with a teal collarless shirt instead of the normal button-down. It was a nice colour choice and it made his outfit all the more fashionable. His hair was parted off-centre and fell over his forehead in dark textured curtains, allowing a teasing glimpse of the younger’s forehead.

Wonwoo didn’t even want to START on the younger’s face and continued observing in silence. He always looked so perfect -effortlessly so.

 

‘Hyung, what’re you looking at?... Let’s eat.’

He was glad he didn’t have to answer that question, he grabbed his phone and sat down in the single armchair. Pulling up his sleeves as he picked up his chopsticks to begin eating.

‘That purple really suits you, hyung.’, Mingyu beamed at him from the middle of the 3-seater sofa where he normally sat. Wonwoo pulled his turtleneck higher to conceal his blush.

‘Thanks.’, he mumbled as he nibbled on some kind of seasoned meat, his eyes widening at the depth of flavour that exploded in his mouth, the more he chewed.

He hummed in approval, nodding his head and Mingyu chuckled. It was really good.

 

‘What time are you leaving today? I needed to talk to you about something.’  
The taller boy asked half-way through Wonwoo’s meal, the younger was already done. Wonwoo was stilled –yet again- by how shockingly quick Mingyu ate, he shook his head with wonder.

Then answered in an apologetic tone. ‘Actually. I was gonna tell you I won’t be needing a ride home today. Sorry.’

The younger was busy replacing lids on containers and gathering the leftovers when he paused to look at Wonwoo. His face smiling, but his eyes had a tiny hint of sadness masked by fake happiness. The older couldn’t look at him, so he pretended to be fascinated by the design on his plain chopsticks. He didn’t like upsetting the younger even if it was something trivial such as this, Mingyu should be happy –Disappointment and sadness had no place in his loving heart. 

‘Can I ask why?’  
Mingyu asked, failing to conceal the dejected tone of his husky voice. It was always hard when one had to tell the other they wouldn’t be with them, but he tried to convey that the situation couldn’t be helped. 

‘My friends and I have this yearly ritual where we make sure to hang out before we leave for the holidays. We’re doing that today.’

 

‘Sounds like fun. What do you guys normally do?’  
The younger nodded slowly, sounding genuinely intrigued –albeit upset- but his sincere voice told Wonwoo they were ok. Mingyu spoke like he cared about Wonwoo, enough to actually want to know what he got up to when they weren’t together. 

His face took on a thoughtful expression, he continued taking small bites of the food, thoroughly chewing before he swallowed. In between his eating, he re-told memories of the past gatherings with his friends.

 

 

Like the time they went ice-skating and Soonyoung fractured his ankle even before he stepped on the ice. Or the time Jihoon’s phone fell in the Han river as he attempted to capture the pretty lights in the distance on video, it was Wonwoo’s elbow that accidently caused that. He laughed when he recalled how he lived with Jihoon’s silent treatment for the next month because of that, and Mingyu laughed along too.

There was also the time Jeonghan and Soonyoung got lost in the mountains on the outskirts of another city, where they were meant to go camping. Wonwoo and the mountain rescue team found them in a cave 5 hours later. He still had the picture he’d secretly snapped of the tearful pair as they congratulated each other on surviving. Mingyu choked on his water as he laughed at Soonyoung’s blotchy, snotty face and Jeonghan’s ugly crying.

Another time Wonwoo had a falling-out with Jihoon, and due to his stubborn nature refused to attend. So, his friends had dragged the short boy over to his place and they stayed up all night eating, watching movies and laughing about their younger days. By the end of that gathering, Jihoon and Wonwoo were crying in each other’s arms as they apologised and made up.

Since that day, even if they occasionally argued, they never allowed themselves to fall-out like that anymore.

‘Wow, you must be super close with them… I can tell you really care for them.’  
Mingyu murmured thoughtfully, when Wonwoo put his chopsticks down to face him, he had his cheeks squished in his palms and elbows on his knees. And he was looking up at Wonwoo with the wondrous stare of a child listening to their favourite bed-time story. Cute, the older mused.

Then he sheepishly scratched the side of his neck, wondering how the younger saw through him so accurately.  
‘Do I?’, Wonwoo tilted his head in question.

‘Yeah. Your face, voice… it all changes when you talk about them. You get all loving, it’s nice to see.’  
The younger had his face propped up with one hand now, the other busy spinning and spinning a chopstick on the coffee table.

‘Oh. I didn’t realise, is it weird?’, he felt his own face scrunch up as he self-consciously pushed and pulled at his own cheeks.

Mingyu laughed with his whole body, at Wonwoo’s antics. Wonwoo grinned along, content to know the younger was comfortable enough with him to express himself without inhibition. Then the younger slid closer to the edge of the sofa and pulled Wonwoo’s left hand from his face.

Mingyu smiled at him then, showcasing his canines which were slightly longer than the rest of his gleaming set of dentition –he really resembled a puppy when he smiled like this. Something shifted in Wonwoo’s heart, he wasn’t sure whether it was indigestion or his inner Mingyu fangirl.  
Shaking his head lightly, he watched as the younger started playing with his pale fingers. Why was he so cute?

‘It’s not weird, hyung. You just look so happy and proud, like the love shines in your eyes. You’re not normally this… expressive. I like seeing you happy, like this.’

He blushed at Mingyu’s heartfelt tone and looked down at his dress shoes to distract his frantic heartbeat and give his flaming face time to cool down –he didn’t know the shoes were this shiny, nice.

But Mingyu was still playing with his hand, drawing patterns on the back of it, transferring his rings from one finger to the next and tapping it with own. This made it quite hard for the older boy to focus, the blush was still blossoming, so he hoped a subject change would help distract them both. 

‘Is it important?’, he voiced, a short while later.

The coffee table was all cleared, rubbish discarded and containers packed. They were sitting side-by-side on the sofa now, barely a hair-width of space between their sides. His hand was now in Mingyu’s lap, being laced and unlaced with the younger’s fingers. His heart fluttered each time it happened, but he didn’t know how to retrieve his hand without rousing suspicion. So, he let it be. His hand seemed to be having more fun over there than it ever did by his side, anyway.

Mingyu looked up from their laced fingers in his lap, and tilted his head with a confused expression. So wonwoo clarified.  
‘You said you wanted to talk to me about something, is it important?’

His eyes lit up in understanding, ‘Kinda… but you’re gonna have to wait till another time to find out.’, the younger fluttered his long eyelashes, sassy voice and all. It made Wonwoo both blush and pout, he didn’t like not knowing.

Mingyu unlaced their fingers and Wonwoo immediately felt the loss, he was about to frown but he ended up supressing a smile half way through. The other’s right arm was around his neck and the index finger on his other hand was poking his rosy cheek with a coo.

‘You’re super cute when you smile. Also, I’m going back to my hometown tomorrow morning to prepare for the wedding, so I won’t be working.’

“Already?” He wanted to ask, his smile faltered, it was hard to conceal his disappointment. The comment about him being “cute” slipping by unnoticed in his state of sudden emotional turmoil. He’d thought they’d still have Friday together before everyone broke up for the holidays. Now that he realised today was all they had before a period of separation, he felt despondent.

 

‘Oh, so when’re you coming back then?’, Wonwoo maintained a certain level of forced cheer in his voice, trying to look at the other’s face -even though it was hard with the arm around him and the lack of space.

‘Not so sure, probably next Wednesday.’

His heart stumbled, he was finding it difficult to come to terms with the idea of nearly a full week of no Mingyu, when they’d spent more time together this week than with anyone else. It felt like they were being forced apart, he didn’t want to be away from him for that long. But Wonwoo was also going back to his hometown so he convinced himself, he wouldn’t have time to miss Mingyu.

Surely, he’d be too busy catching up with family. At least, he hoped that would be the case.

 

 

 

Mingyu left after a brief hug and a dramatic farewell –he could be so extra when he wanted. But Wonwoo had a feeling the younger was doing this for HIM, to make him smile. Since he’s been choked up with emotion the whole time, that he’d hardly said a word –for fear that his voice would crack. He never handled good-byes well.

An hour of trying to work later, he stopped. He just couldn’t get over the feeling that he’d come across as cold, the thought that Mingyu might think Wonwoo wouldn’t miss him kept circling in his mind. Especially because when Mingyu hugged him warmly and whispered, “I’ll miss you, hyung” against his ear, Wonwoo’s body froze and he didn’t get to reply.

 

 

He face-palmed at his stupidity, then his phone began buzzing on the coffee table where he’d left it earlier. He rushed over and managed to pick up just before the phone stopped ringing.

Disappointment was evident on his facial features, he couldn’t help it. He sighed, mentally preparing himself for Soonyoung’s ear-splitting pitch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel crappy today, cuz I failed my driving test AGAIN this morning. T-T  
> Reading your kind comments & writing meanie actually cheered me up a little. Which is weird, cuz I was literally in tears (yes, I'm a dramatic, emotional b*tch) before editing this chapter. I hope it's good <3
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	18. Chapter 18

He blinked blearily, the low purple lighting and the moody atmosphere combining with the alcohol, to produce an artificial tranquillity. Focusing on his friend’s dramatically animated face, until his vision stabilised –albeit blurry, since he removed the contact lens earlier when his eyes felt incredibly dry. He couldn’t see too clearly, but he could hear well enough to know that his friend was unsurprisingly still talking. Tuning back into the one-sided conversation, he rocked gently in his seat as he placed his cheeks in his warm palms. Elbows propped on the table and a sleepy smile on his face, as he listened.

‘So I was like “Fuck off with your empty words and stupid questions” cuz I was in the middle of taking selfies for Instagram, you don’t fucking mess with that. Ya know?’

‘You didn’t think he was serious?’, someone asked in a dreamy tone.

‘Seungcheol is that one dickhead, that’s NEVER serious. Anyway, as I said that, HE FUCKING…’ He paused dramatically, gasping as he raised the audiences’ anticipation for the next part of his story.

‘…GOT. DOWN. ON. ONE. KNEE. Every dumb bitch in town KNOOOWS what that means. Even Soonie would know’

‘HEY’, the same person interjected, tone loud and offended.

‘SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH, I’m in the middle of telling a story. DON’T fucking disrespect like that or you’ll get it.’

The threat hung in the air, mixing with the tipsy and pleasantly warm mood.

A smiley-faced Jihoon put his short arm around a sulking and mumbling Soonyoung, while Jeonghan flipped his hair over his shoulder.

He’d heard of a “phantom limb” before, when people who lost their hand or another part of their body to amputation could STILL feel that limb. It was a creepy concept and he shivered at the thought of it, but he was sure hair didn’t count as a “limb”. So, he couldn’t understand why Jeonghan acted like he still had long hair, when it’d been almost a year since he chopped it all off. Then, he realised he shouldn’t be questioning such things, because ALL his friends were weird like that.

 

 

 

 

As Wonwoo finished his 4th or 5th can of beer for the night, he leaned back against the karaoke room’s booth and made an observation. Jihoon was positively drunk, judging by his flushed cheeks which were the same shade of vibrant red as Soonyoung’s hair. The two were in the middle of some disgustingly emotive mating ritual, staring into each other’s eyes and rubbing noses tenderly. Wonwoo cringed, the urge to get more drunk becoming stronger.

Earlier on in the gathering, when they met up for dinner at their favourite restaurant, Jihoon had revealed –with a less lifeless facial expression, than usual- that they were dating.

Which surprisingly, didn’t surprise anyone. It had always been obvious that there was SOMEthing going on between the two of them, although no one was sure EXACTLY what it was. Over the years, he’d questioned their behaviour towards the other many times –in his head, of course. Due to their unconventional relationship, that caused people to assume they were enemies from their outwardly harsh words and actions.

But, those were only superficial.

As their best friend, he saw what they were like behind closed doors. He was stunned -every time- at their ability to live together while they bickered and fought every waking second. He found it perplexing how they never had anything positive to say about the other even when they went out of their way to support each other. The way they said the vilest of things, picking at the other’s flaws just to get a reaction. Especially, when the love shinning in their eyes was clear as day.

These things all hinted at the fact that there was SOMEthing else, another factor that was influencing their strange dynamic. He just didn’t know what it was. Now though, as he looked at the pair, holding the other with goofy smiles on their faces. His throat clogged with emotion and he felt a surge of pride and happiness, at their loving exchange.

Delight filled his entire being at the image of his dear best friends.

Broaching the topic of love confessions and relationships was already hard enough. So, he could imagine how much more difficult it must’ve been to confess to someone you’ve known almost your whole life. Wonwoo was proud of them for bravely taking this huge leap of faith towards their happiness.

Admittedly, it was a tad awkward to suddenly see them go from glaring to kissing. It was also weirdly tough getting used to the unexpected change, when he’d witnessed them live as best friends for 17 years. He didn’t know if he’d ever get used to it but he DID know that he loved seeing them happy, like this.

With that being said, he knew he wouldn’t be able to do what they did. 

Well, at least everything made sense now, seems like he had good reason to suspect them. 

 

 

The oldest of the bunch chose that moment to clear his throat and Wonwoo’s gaze drifted away from the pair to focus his attention on the other boy in the room –he didn’t fancy getting scolded for being “disrespectful” as Soonyoung was earlier. He’d rather avoid conflict, no matter how harmless and loving Jeonghan really was. Jihoon passed him an open can of beer and clung it with his own, just as Jeonghan took a deep breath to continue telling his story.

The story of how his boyfriend of 4 years –Choi Seungcheol- proposed to him earlier that week. It seemed this year’s gathering was full of announcements of relationship milestones and everyone seemed to have found love and happiness with someone. 

Although, Wonwoo was truly the happiest person in the world at hearing the good news, he still couldn’t help feeling salty. Knowing that he was the only single one in his group of friends left a bitter taste in his mouth. Frowning, he tipped the can back, gulping down the contents to cleanse his palate.

He sat back and tried to watch as Soonyoung and Jeonghan attempted to sing a duet to some popular ballad. Although, he didn’t hear much with the fuzzy feeling that was slowly overtaking his tired body. He squinted at the table, his hand aimlessly feeling around for something to drink. Probably another can of beer -since that’s all they had, but his vision was swimming making him see double of everything.

That should’ve hinted at him to stop, which he would’ve -if he weren’t already drunk, that is. Jihoon passed him another can and he accepted it gladly, already way past the point where he could make rational decisions.

As the night stretched on and bled into the early hours of the morning, they finally decided to end their long gathering. The boys stood outside the karaoke place, hugging, crying and smiling like the drunk idiots they were as they waited for Jeonghan’s boyfriend to arrive. There was no doubt they looked like a real mess.

The new couple were the first to leave as they stumbled towards a taxi and a very drunk Soonyoung proceeded to shout their address at the driver, who recoiled from the volume. Wonwoo didn’t blame him, the kid was a 100x louder when he was drunk -therefore, the driver’s reaction was understandable.

What wasn’t understandable however, was his persistent rejection of Jeonghan’s offer to drop him off at his apartment. Even Seungcheol, who didn’t know him at all, had begged him to come with them. But as the couple insisted it wouldn’t be a problem, he insisted he’d be fine finding his own way home. After his blatant refusal, they just let it go. But not before a warm squeeze and some heartfelt cursing from his favourite hyung.

 

 

 

 

 

The early morning chill was almost paralysing as he shivered and stumbled down the long stretch of a deserted road. He had a vague idea as to where he was, but he was in that stage of drunk where everything looked familiar and nothing was wrong.

Past the point of pleasantly buzzed, he was entering the dangerous territory of almost blackout drunk. The streetlights flickered as he passed under them on unsteady feet and he turned left onto the next street.

To sober Wonwoo this was ridiculous because this wasn’t the way home, but drunk Wonwoo was in full control now so he had no say in the matter. The boy was irrationally happy and optimistic, not to mention clingy when he got this drunk -which was rarely.

He preferred being sober, knowing exactly what he was doing and being aware of his surroundings at all times. Wonwoo didn’t like being left in the dark, not knowing what was happening. He knew he’d hate himself in the morning. At the present moment though, all he could do was subconsciously hope he’d at least make it home safely.

As he navigated his way through the unfamiliar streets, blissfully ignorant to the fact that he was moving away from his home with every step, he began to feel increasingly unsteady on his feet. His body was starting to feel heavier and even his head was drooping lower, his neck no longer able to hold it up.

Somehow it was subconsciously ingrained in him to call someone when he was like this. He retrieved his phone from his coat pocket and speed dialled the first contact in his favourites list -believing it to be Soonyoung. The idea seemed sound and non-redundant at all to Wonwoo, he was too drunk to realise that calling his piss-drunk best friend would be pointless.

 

 

Wonwoo isn’t too sure what happened when the call connected, he couldn’t tell you what he’d said or what he was hearing. All he remembers is that he was feeling incredibly happy and running dangerously low on energy and time.

Black dots began to sporadically appear in his vision, he steadied himself by leaning against a brick wall for support. His weakened legs became incapable of holding up his weight, as they gave way under him, resulting in him sinking to the cold concrete below.

 

 

He vaguely recalled a voice that wasn’t his own, calling for him as his mind decided to take an ill-timed break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short one, but I'll upload again tomorrow & on Friday.  
> And it's gonna be very different, let's say like a... different perspective?
> 
> hehehe <3 hope you like.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	19. Chapter 19

**Mingyu’s POV.**

 

 

_It was a sunny day and he was enjoying the comfort presented by the warm sun rays as they kissed his golden skin, making him glow._

_He opened his eyes slowly, recognising his back yard almost instantly, as heard a deep-voiced male calling his name -he realised he wasn’t alone._

_Searching the garden for the owner of the pleasurable baritone, he stumbled across a dark-haired scowling boy._

_The boy had a feline-like gaze, defined jawline and strong chin. His pale skin reminded him of milk, pure and unblemished, his silky hair fell over his eyes slightly and his fingers itched to gently caress the strands away._

_He was tall, but still shorter than himself and definitely much smaller and slimmer in build. Contrary to his petite body his shoulders were very broad and wide, his cheekbones high and Cupid-lips pursed in determination._

_Despite the scowl on his face, Mingyu firmly believed he was the most handsome man to ever walk on this Earth._

_He almost resembled a fox with his sharp features and cunning gaze, everything about him screamed “sexy” to Mingyu. All he wanted to do was touch the shorter boy and make him his._

_Then, the sunny garden transformed into darkness. The sexy boy fell through his fingers into the dark abyss and his pleasant voice was replaced by a shrill ringing sound._

 

 

 

 

 

He woke up startled and slightly disoriented, then he slowly began to recognise his dark room and the ringing phone next to his pillow.

 

‘Hello?’, he answered groggily, voice heavy with sleep.

 

‘Gyu, dat youuu?’

A deep voice slurred into his ear, giving him the shock of a lifetime. He glanced at the contact name, then the time.

 

**3:17AM**

 

‘Wonwoo hyung?!’

Almost having a heart attack, he shot up to a sitting position. Sleep was long forgotten, he could recognise that voice anywhere. 

 

Wonwoo giggled, definitely not acting like himself.

 

‘Hyung, are you drunk?’

 

‘Juss a lil bit, I pwessed Kwon Soonyoung ba- you pic-ked up instead’

The boy was positively more than a “lil bit” drunk, a LOT more. But Mingyu was confused, didn’t Wonwoo go out with his friends tonight. That would explain the drinking but why was he calling him at 3am? Then he caught the faint, distant sounds of traffic, a horrifying thought materialised in his mind.

 

Was he not home yet? ...oh god. He forced his voice not to crack as he slowly asked with bated breath, ‘You don’t sound like you’re at home, where are you?’

 

Now that he paid attention to the background noises, he could tell Wonwoo was indeed not home. It sounded a lot like he was walking and “oh my god what if he got lost?”, was the prominent thought in his mind as he got more and more nervously anxious. Clearly, Wonwoo didn’t share his concern as he slurred deeply, ‘Hmmm, you have a nice voice, Gyu.’

‘Wonwoo, just tell me where the hell you are.’

Sighing he ran a hand down his tired face, drunk Wonwoo had the attention span of a goldfish and was a sexy-voiced flirt. Noted. And that nickname, why did it sound so good to him? He normally hated it when his family and friends called him that -but they weren’t Wonwoo, so that explains it.

 

Jumping out of bed he pulled his jacket over his pyjamas and began lacing his trainers, at the door. He had to find him. Clearly, the older boy was in no state to be roaming the streets at this ungodly hour, what if something bad hap-

His thought was cut off by Wonwoo’s drunken slurs and the younger boy got increasingly worried and restless.

‘I weally love it when you say my naaame.’

 

‘JEON WONWOO, for goodness sake. Where ARE you?’

 

He had a habit of raising his voice and using full names when the nerves got to him, he was really worried now.

Giggling, then rustling and a heavy thud. Sounded a bit like something fell to the ground.

‘HYUNG ARE YOU OK? DID YOU TRIP?’

 

He was running downstairs to his car, fastening his seatbelt and starting the engine in record time. If only he cared this much about other things in life.

 

‘Mingoo, I d-don’t fe-eel too g-goo...’

 

Silence.

 

‘HELLO? WONWOO HYUNG? ANSWER ME FOR FUCK SAKE...’

 

Loud static filled the silence on the other end of the line. He stared blankly at the white iPhone 8 Plus in his hand. Feeling the sudden urge to run it over with his car.

“Jeon Wonwoo literally just blacked-out on me, oh my freaking days.” He thought as he began to fully freak out.

‘FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK, WHAT DO I DOOO?’ It’s a good thing he was in his car as he had his mental breakdown, his roommate wouldn’t have appreciated it.

 

Suddenly he was hit with a thought, or more precisely a name. “Kwon Soonyoung”, he typed it into his Instagram app, there couldn’t be THAT many people on here with the same name, right? Wrong.

The search yielded at least 100 odd profiles and he groaned in physical pain at his predicament. Thinking that his beautiful baby was out there somewhere, cold and unconscious almost brought tears to his eyes. Scrolling through the DPs of those profiles, his finger halted on the screen.

 

 

He’d recognise that feline gaze and sexy face anywhere, clicking on it he glanced through the profile. “NeagaHosh” was the name of the individual who was pictured alongside his scowling baby, the unfamiliar face had a head of vibrant red hair and a bright smile. He couldn’t understand how the two came to be friends, but now was NOT the time to dwell on that. He typed a quick direct message and waited.

Luckily for him, the reply was almost instant and he thanked whoever was watching over him.

 

**-Who the fuck are you?**

**-Why the fuck are you dm-ing my Soonie at ass o’clock?**

**-And how do you know my best friend, that you’re asking about him?**

**-Are you a fucking stalker?**

 

 

**-I’m Kim Mingyu.**

**-Wonwoo and I met at work and we’re really close.**

**-THE Kim Mingyu?**

**-Cool.**

**-I still don’t understand what the fuck you want tho.**

**-Wonwoo JUST called me.**

**-He sounded super drunk then blacked-out on me.**

**-I need to know where he was last so I can bring him home safely.**

**-I understand you don’t know me.**

**-But I really care about him and I’d appreciate your cooperation.**

He held his breath as he waited for a reply. This must be Jihoon the other best friend -he was really super hostile.

 

**-Fuck, well shit.**

**-Hang on…**

**-The dickhead was meant to go home with our other friend. I was just on the phone with him and apparently Wonwoo refused.**

**-So he left him outside the karaoke place.**

**-Fuck.**

 

**-Can you tell me the address plz**

 

The moment he got the message with the address he was already speeding to the location. Apparently, it was only a 7-minute drive away -that might have had something to do with his blatant disregard for the speed limits as he prioritised getting to Wonwoo first.

 

Outside the venue -which was still open, as it displayed a 24-hour sign, he didn’t know whether to check inside or begin his search for his pale angel outside. Knowing what Wonwoo was like, he’d have probably walked down the road and taken a wrong turn somewhere.

Mingyu began lightly jogging down the road as he dialled Wonwoo’s number hoping he would hear the other’s ringtone. His heavy feet skidded to a stop at a crossroad, there were three possible routes but only one of them would lead him to Wonwoo.

Within a split second he’d made up his mind and continued jogging down his chosen route, praying that he wasn’t wrong. He couldn’t be prouder of his decision to continuously dial the other’s number. Because if it weren’t for the faint light and the even fainter vibrating, he would’ve missed him. He’d went past the incredibly dark tiny side road when he caught the faint light out of the corner of his eye.

 

It was just a glimpse, he wouldn’t think anyone would be there. But he had doubts, so he instantly froze then backtracked. Switching on his phone’s flashlight, he directed it at the road and that’s when he saw him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

According to his small build, Wonwoo shouldn’t have been this heavy. But he was knocked out cold so Mingyu hoped it was all dead weight. He struggled, especially when he had to open the car door but he needed both hands to hold the sleeping boy in his arms up.

Hoping to be forgiven for placing him on the cold concrete, he quickly picked him back up with an exaggerated groan and dropped him down on the passenger seat.

He leaned over him to fasten the seatbelt when the older boy’s head rolled to his neck, soft cushiony lips just left of his Adam’s apple. He gulped, the movement causing the other’s slightly parted lips to graze his pulse point.

 

Slowly, he leaned away from the still sleeping boy, a bit dazed. Wonwoo’s eyelids were delicately shut, eyebrows relaxed and pale face calm with tranquillity. It was strange seeing his usually furrowed, frowning face so peaceful and stress-free.

The passenger door slammed shut with a bit more force than he originally intended, then he had one hand on the spot where Wonwoo’s lips had been and the other palm over his mouth, to stifle his scream. When he’d expressed his feels adequately, he shook his whole body as if he was a phone on vibrate mood.

He was aware that if someone were to witness his questionable de-stressing methods, they’d probably call the police. Mingyu didn’t care though, he needed to do this. Loosen up a bit and calm down or he’d end up doing things with a very drunk Wonwoo. Things, that he’d definitely never forgive himself for doing.

 

From the very first day that they met and every time after that, he never failed to notice how effortlessly sexy the older was. With his harsh words and affinity for rejecting and pushing everyone away –it gave him a hard time trying to control himself, sometimes he even wondered why he was holding back in the first place.

As he began the careful drive to Wonwoo’s apartment, he tried really hard to focus on the clear road ahead and abide by the traffic laws. But his head had other ideas, turning to glance at the other boy every two seconds, a small smile never leaving his face. He could feel how foolishly sappy he was being, but he couldn’t stop it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Killing the engine, he brainstormed a plan of action. His arms ached so there was no way he was carrying Wonwoo to his apartment, no matter how much he liked him. With regret, he circled the car and opened the passenger door, unbuckling the seatbelt –careful not to lean too close and repeat his earlier mistake.

He gently shook the sleeping boy by the shoulder,

‘Hyung?... wake up.’

 

A cute whine was his reply, he watched as Wonwoo curled up into the seat, away from him.

He leaned closer to his ear and took a deep breath, filling his lungs with air, then...

 

 

 

 

‘JEON WONWOO, RUUUN!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow's one will be a teeny bit longer. I don't like short chapters but this is the only way I could divide them up. ENJOY (I hope)
> 
> Btw, ANOTHER freaking comeback in Feb. I'm so FREAKING HYPED AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  
> I hope they take time to rest as well though. Here's to more meanie CHEERS!  
> I need to stop now. BYE.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	20. Chapter 20

The mentioned boy shot up with wide, wild eyes at the shout of his name, frantically looking around until his eyes settled on Mingyu. The latter found it extremely difficult to stifle his chuckles, he really didn’t think that would work –Clearly, he was wrong. At that moment, the older began to sway in his seat as a goofy smile overtook his features,

‘MINGYU!’ he shouted drunkenly, suddenly throwing his entire body on him. Skinny arms tightly wound around his neck, they were cheek-to-cheek and the older boy was giggling and humming –definitely still drunk then, but so cute.

Mingyu stumbled slightly at the force of the hug, but he managed to drag the older away from the car, steadying him with an arm around his thin waist. He closed the door and locked his car with the other arm.

 

Then, they both nearly toppled to the floor when the smaller boy decided climbing Mingyu was a good idea. Thankfully, gravity did them a solid and they stayed upright, albeit barely.

 

‘Gyuuuuuu... you smell sho gooood’

The shiver inducing sentence was slurred breathily into his ear and he forcefully squeezed his eyes shut. He still wasn’t used to the nickname and he needed to concentrate on getting this drunk, filter-less flirt to bed. But part of him wanted to enjoy the affection -he was 100% sure sober Wonwoo wouldn’t be caught dead saying or doing any of this.

 

‘Can you get on my back, hyung?’

Deeming piggybacking, a better idea than dragging him along, he turned around and knelt on the ground. Waiting.

 

‘I like it more when you call me Wonwoo’ the boy mumbled from behind him, a pout in his deep voice.

 

Mingyu face-palmed, really? Why was this happening to him? But more importantly, was the alcohol talking or did normal Wonwoo also share the sentiment? And did drunk Wonwoo have the same preferences as Sober Wonwoo?

His father had once told him that alcohol made people more honest, inhibited their choice to lie and conceal the truth, gave them the courage they lacked to do and say the things they wanted. It sounded about right, even though both him and his father were drunk when they were having that conversation, so he doubted the credibility.

But he really wanted it to be true, so he ignored that insignificant piece of information. This meant that Wonwoo really DID like it when he dropped the honorific. Well, that was strangely -kinky.

 

‘Please, just get on’

He sighed, not expecting the force with which Wonwoo jumped on his back, or the tightness of the other’s arms around his neck. Mingyu could tell he was just excited, with his non-stop giggling -he wasn’t really trying to strangle him to death. Or at least he hoped so, because it sure felt that way.

Standing up, he loosened the arms around his neck so that they were less taut and sighed in relief when he could finally breathe again.

 

Once on the elevator, they began their ascent to the 17th floor. Wonwoo switched strategies from nuzzling the side of his neck, to blowing raspberries on the sensitive skin just under his ear and he nearly dropped him on the metal below on several occasions.

It wasn’t like he could tell him to stop, or explain that his actions were turning him on. Because he’d come to realise that drunk Wonwoo was quite stupid and cutely giggled his way through every situation. So instead he prayed the elevator would go faster. Just as it was coming to a stop, he felt wet smooches on his right cheek. His mouth fell wide open and he’s pretty sure one of his knees wobbled -although he wasn’t sure which one.

Not only were the kisses tightly bruising but they were also very loud. Mingyu really needed a break, he couldn’t take this abuse anymore. He deposited the boy next to his front door, as gently as he could.

Next, he watched amused as the drunk boy slid down the wall slowly, until he was spread like a starfish on the floor. The pinkish tint to his cheeks and the uncontrollable dumb giggling, reminding him of Patrick from SpongeBob.

He shook his head -albeit, smiling uncontrollably himself, and he wasn’t even drunk. So who was the dumb one? -turning his attention to the electronic code lock, he blanked.

What was the passcode, again?

 

Granted, he only saw it once but he prided himself in his intelligence and ability to pick up information quickly. He wasn’t a full-scholarship Harvard graduate for nothing. But for the life of him, he couldn’t remember what the passcode was.

Thinking back to Friday night, the memories began rolling in. A sleepy Wonwoo leaning into him as they walked to the door, then Wonwoo typing the passcode. He vividly remembered hearing the beeping of the lock.

As hard as he tried to see that moment though, he couldn’t. All his distracted brain supplied him with, was Wonwoo’s angelic side profile. Pursed pink lips and a pretty softly angled nose.

 

He realised with wonton embarrassment that he never saw the code, because his eyes were busy seeing something much more appealing. Dammit.

 

‘Hyung, what’s the code?’

He sighed heavily, already not expecting a straight-forward answer.

 

‘Call me Wonwoo, if you really WONWOO know’

The younger turned to the cackling boy, horrified yet amazed at his ability to tell such a bad joke. But he WAS drunk so Mingyu would refrain from judging him too much.

 

‘What’s the code then, Wonwoo?’

 

‘I love the way you say my naaame, Mingyu.’

Then, he was being back-hugged or in a more accurate term, crushed alive. Drunk-Wonwoo was affectionate -violently so. Noted.

 

Ripping the older’s arms from around his waist, he swapped their positions so that the smaller was now at the front.

‘Type it in, Wonwoo.’

He unintentionally growled into the other’s ear, he was just tired and it was super late. The boy in his arms unexpectedly shivered and gasped, nimble fingers pressing buttons on the number pad until he heard the click of the door unlocking.

 

The earlier reaction was unexpected but he had a good idea what caused it -he’d have to do it again when Wonwoo was sober, just to make sure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Peeling a clingy Wonwoo off his body and ordering him to change and brush his teeth was a real struggle. The boy just wouldn’t cooperate, so Mingyu had no choice but to threaten him with leaving -surprisingly, it worked.

While the older was changing, he managed to quickly cook some hangover porridge for the morning, using the good part of an almost blackened carrot and the last of the milk. It was a real struggle to scavenge for edible ingredients, but he improvised with what he could find. He remembered Wonwoo mentioning not being able to cook at all, but the lack of food in his kitchen was simply heart-breaking. Mingyu could only hope the other boy’s fridge and pantry weren’t _always_ this empty.

When Mingyu knocked on his bedroom door 20 or so minutes later, Wonwoo was all changed and fast asleep on _top_ of his covers. The younger sighed -yet again, attempting to move the other boy under the covers without waking him, but alas.

 

Wonwoo giggled at him the moment their eyes met and then proceeded to raise his arms for a hug. Mingyu sighed under his breath, shaking his head in disbelief and chuckling as he pushed the arms back down and helped him wear his hoodie the right way. He was sure Wonwoo was the cutest drunk ever, or just the cutest, period. The boy was wearing his hoodie backwards and Mingyu knew he wasn’t meant to die over it as much as he was. 

After helping him into bed properly, he force-fed him a bottle of water and some painkillers. Making sure to bundle him up well in his blankets. 

But unexpectedly, every time he tried to leave, Wonwoo’s eyes would shoot wide open and he’d cling onto him, whining.

Coaxing the older to sleep was much harder than he thought it’d be -he contemplated just staying over and going back in the morning. According to the wall clock in the kitchen it was already 4:57am anyway, was there really a point in even sleeping?

 

The lights were off in Wonwoo’s room and from what Mingyu could tell the older boy seemed to be finally asleep. He gently began freeing his limbs from Wonwoo’s tight grip and had the bedroom door almost completely shut, when he heard a small yet deep voice mumble.

‘Please, don’t leave me, Gyu’

Wonwoo sniffled, was he crying?

 

The younger was by his side instantly, and the smaller boy was sat upright in his bed, throwing his arms over him the moment he came over.

He pulled back and held Wonwoo’s soft face in his palms, wiping the tears and speaking in a hushed voice once Wonwoo’s crying slowed down,

‘I need to leave, Wonwoo and you need to get some sleep.’

‘S-sleep wi-th meee.’

 

He looked around the dark room with raised eyebrows and a disbelieving face as the older pulled at his jumper with both fists. What the actual hell was happening?  

 

Of course, he knew he didn’t mean it sexually, but rather “sleep” in the sense that he wanted them to lie down and close their eyes together. However, as tempting as that offer was, Mingyu had to decline.

There was no guarantee the drunk boy would remember any of this -and even if he did, it still wouldn’t be right. As the sober one of the pair, he would have to disappoint both of them.

 

‘No, I can’t. I... have to feed my cat.’

He tacked on the white lie, when the other’s face crumbled at the rejection. He was trying to get Wonwoo to fall asleep -without him- and save himself from ruining their budding friendship, not upset him.

 

‘Cat?’, Wonwoo sniffled tilting his head cutely,

The younger nodded his head vigorously, hoping the drunk boy would believe him so he could finally leave.

‘Yes. Cat. She needs food, Wonwoo. I can’t let her starve.’

‘You can’t let her starve.’, Wonwoo whispered, looking down at his long pale fingers.

Mingyu could almost see the cogs turning in the older’s head -painfully slowly- and he nodded encouragingly when their gazes finally met.

 

‘Then, you have to go feed her, Gyu’

There was a certain innocent urgency to his tone, and his heart effectively turned to gooey, melted slush at the pure adorableness.

 

‘Lie down and go to sleep first, then I’ll leave.’

He wasn’t about to abandon this cutie for an imaginary pet, just yet.

 

‘Ok. But Gyu?...’ Wonwoo sounded like a young child, who didn’t want his mum leaving him -in case a monster came out. It was endearingly captivating, he couldn’t look away.

 

‘Yes?’

 

‘Come closer’

 

He obeyed immediately, leaning over the older and waiting for an explanation. When none came, he asked.

 

‘What is it, Wonwoo?’

 

‘I think I have something in my eye. Blow on it for me?’

 

Just as he leaned in the rest of the way and pursed his lips to blow, something soft, warm and plush met his own lips. It was gone as quickly as it had come and the heart shattering silence was replaced with quiet giggles.

The smooching sound had registered belatedly in his head, his eyes widened as he realised what just happened. The cheeky bastard had just kissed him -ON THE FREAKING LIPS.

His brain short-circuited and he breathed a quiet “Fuck” as he turned his head to the side. Drunk or not, Mingyu had to ask him.

 

‘Did you really just... k-kiss me?’

 

‘Yeeeah and I wanna do it again’

Mingyu pushed the hoodie clad arms back on the bed as they attempted to grab his face. What the fuck? Was this real life? Was he dreaming? He realised he might as well have been -dreaming, that is. Since only HE was sober enough to remember this exchange or the night as a whole.

‘No. You’re not kissing me again, Wonwoo.’

 

‘Then I’m not going to sleep either.’ He pouted, his catlike eyes twinkling in the darkness as he glared at the younger with determination. As if he could compel him to kissing if he stared hard enough.

Mingyu sighed -he found that he was doing that a lot today, gluing his brain matter back together, Surprisingly it took a lot of courage and nerve to do what he about to, he couldn’t believe he was doing this.

‘Wonwoo, if you go to sleep now, like a good boy. Then, you can kiss me as much as you want, later.’ His voice was bold and even as he purred in the older boy’s ear.

He didn’t see the harm in lying since it was highly unlikely that Wonwoo would remember it. And even if he did, it wouldn’t matter because HE was the one that kissed him, not the other way around.

 

The pale boy shuddered underneath him, his breath hitching. His voice sounded dazed when he next spoke up.

‘Promise?’

Mingyu simply nodded, wishing for it to be true. But he knew better, so his smile was bittersweet.

 

‘I promise.’

 

‘Ok. You can go feed the cat now, Mingyu’

Wonwoo turned on his side, folding his arm under his head as he yawned.

‘Good night, hyung’

The younger mumbled from the doorway as it finally clicked shut, hearing a soft voice sing-song,

‘Night night.’

 

Then, he was out the door and on the elevator, before he changed his mind and ran back to Wonwoo.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back in the familiarity of his apartment, he sighed in relief. Dropping himself face first into the sofa, he checked the display of the digital clock under the flat-screen TV.

 

**5:31am**

 

He was supposed to start the drive to his hometown at around 7ish, to make it in time for breakfast with the family. There really was no point in sleeping now, it’d make more sense to get there earlier than planned, _then_ rest.

With his decision made, he grabbed his suitcases and bags that he’d packed the previous night and went back down to his car.

 

En-route to Anyang, he was grateful for the holidays because he didn’t think he could face Wonwoo knowing the kind of night they shared. Especially, because the other boy wouldn’t have a clue.

 

 

 

 

He decided he’d take this time to reflect on their relationship and figure out what he really wanted to do with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer from yesterday's chapter. I've never had Instagram so I don't even know how it works, I hope that wasn't obvious.
> 
> I think I like this chapter, what do you guys think?
> 
> Also follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono) if you're interested. I do nothing on there but we can chat & stuff. I'm gonna go now >_<
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	21. Chapter 21

He woke up Friday morning, A: feeling like he never went to sleep. And B: feeling like he needed to throw up.

The latter of the two more urgent, as he shot out of bed and ran to the bathroom, heaving and heaving until he feared he’d lose a lung. His mouth tasted vile, throat dry and scratchy like sandpaper, he aggressively scrubbed it clean. Admittedly, with more toothpaste than necessary, but he honestly couldn’t live with that nasty feeling in his mouth, anymore.

His head was pounding, it felt like his skull had cracked open, right down the middle and the pain was almost too much to bare. God. How much had he drunk last night? He didn’t recall ever being this hungover.

 

He carefully sat at his desk with two water bottles, popping the painkiller pills in his mouth as he started his laptop. He drained the entire bottle. _Thirsty bitch_ , the thought randomly crossed his mind and he laughed at himself -perhaps he was feeling crazier than usual, today. Must be the hungover, he thought.

He nodded, agreeing with his latest thought. Then he drank half of the second bottle, while writing an e-mail into work to let them know he wouldn’t be coming.

He did however, attach very specific instructions and a list of things that needed to get done, so hopefully, there shouldn’t be too many problems.

 

Then he was faced with a dilemma, sleep or food. He groaned in pain, he wanted both and he needed both, urgently. But his bed was closer, looking so warm and comfortable. He took a step towards it, but then his stomach was growling. Wonwoo made the spilt second decision to bolt into the kitchen before he could change his mind.

It was ok, he’ll just eat something small and simple then sleep the rest of the day, sorted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was already dark outside by the time consciousness pulled him out from his drunken dreams. Drunken, because his dreams were definitely NOT sober. He’d dreamt of kissing Mingyu and it felt so real, his lips tingled at the memory, even when he’d been wide-awake for a while, now.

He was working through his e-mails methodically, replying where necessary, when he came across one from the boss himself. What really caught his attention was that it was specifically sent to only him and five others. He frowned and clicked it open.

 

 

 

“Dearest employees,

 

As you should all be aware by now, the company’s yearly award night is coming up. This is a night to recognise and reward the efforts of our most hardworking members.

 

Personally, there have been a few staff members that have caught my attention and so I write this e-mail to them, in person. As a thank you but also to make an announcement.

 

On the 16th of March 2018, our company’s 50th anniversary event will be held. This year will be more special than the previous years, due to us reaching this huge half-century milestone.

 

On the night, our main investors, advisors, lawyers, associates as well as officials from affiliated companies and even some of our competitors will be in attendance. Therefore, for the presentation portion of the evening I have hand-picked some of our top employees, whom I believe will go above and beyond my expectations, as they always do.

 

As much as this is an important event, I trust that you will deliver.

 

I’ll leave the topic of discussion up to you individually, and would appreciate if you e-mail me a draft by the middle of February. Of course, my e-mails are open if you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to ask.

 

I look forward to being blown away by your innovative ideas. Happy holidays!

 

 

 

 

Yours truly,

 

CEO of Pledis Incorporated,

Hong, Joshua.”

 

 

  

The colour drained from Wonwoo’s face, his hand trembled on the mouse and his vision blurred with tears at the force of his shock. Wonwoo worked hard, he knew that. He _did_.

But _enough_ for him to be noticed out of 200-odd employees? he didn’t think so. 

 

Honestly, he was flattered, it felt like a massive compliment. All his sacrificed sleep and overtime were suddenly justified. It was nice to have someone acknowledge that, but he couldn’t help it when he viewed the reward as more of a punishment.

Of course, all these experts and officials were powerful people, to be given the opportunity of presenting to them would be an honour -to most people. Not Wonwoo, though.

He despised public speaking, he didn’t even know why, just that he felt faint at the thought of it. It’s not like he had a terrible public speaking experience in the past and now suffered the trauma.

In fact, he had no plausible excuse, just that he always remembered avoiding situations where he’d have to speak in front of an audience. His stomach dropped, as he re-read the e-mail, this didn’t seem like something he could avoid. Joshua’s decision was final, the tone of the e-mail voiced to him that it wasn’t up for discussion and the fact that important people were attending made him sick to his core.

 

 

 

 

 

He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he emptied the sparse contents of his stomach, yet again. No longer hungover, this was caused by a different kind of unsettling feeling. However, he did realise that he had no problems with actually doing the research and putting together a killer PowerPoint presentation. He decided to focus on that, for now. He still had almost three months to worry about the part where he’d have to actually present it. That was ages away and people changed every day, he might not even be terrified of it when the time comes.

After giving himself a pep-talk in the mirror and scrubbing the foul taste off his tongue, he was feeling much calmer. He dropped by the kitchen on the way to his bedroom, searching through the cupboards for something to satiate his stomach. In the corner of one cupboard he found a can of tuna, half a bag of oats and a bottle of olive oil. Scowling at the depressing sight, he hoped he’d find something better in the fridge.

Nope, aside from three slices of expired cheddar cheese and some ancient takeaway at the back of his fridge, it was similarly depressing. Closing the fridge, he leaned back on it, unable to believe that was _all_ the food in his apartment. As he stood there, deep in thought, debating whether to go to the convenience store -in the cold- or sleep hungry, he noticed something odd, his head tilted in the direction of his stove.

 

There was an orange pot on the stovetop, he didn’t remember even owning such a pot, let alone actually using it. He cautiously lifted the lid, it was cold to the touch, he noted. It was also, definitely not something he made. As he used a ladle to scoop some and let it fall back into the pot, he noticed the thick consistency, creamy colour and the perfectly cubed vegetables.

Confused and a bit overwhelmed that one of his friends cared enough to do this, he decided to heat it up and try some. While he waited for the vegetable porridge to heat up, he prepared a green bowl and a clean-looking spoon. It had a tiny smudge of something, but his paranoid mind got the best of him and he rinsed it off, just in case. He sat down in front of his TV with the steaming bowl, watching the weather report on some news channel, he didn’t care much.

The porridge smelt pleasantly flavourful, and he took deep inhales enjoying the scent –he was vaguely aware of how strange he looked, but he was alone, so it was okay. After the first spoonful, he knew it wasn’t Soonyoung or Jihoon who made this.

Another six spoonfuls later, and he’d successfully convinced himself that the mystery chef was Jeonghan. They were the only people aside from his parents that knew the passcode to his apartment, he was also with them last night. So, his conclusion was the only sensible one.

Although, Jeonghan’s cooking was never this good, but people got lucky sometimes, so he gave him the benefit of the doubt.

 

He continued eating, commanding his brain to not think about it anymore, when terrifying images of some kind of stalker, -cooking hangover porridge- flicked through his head. Shivering, he hoped he’d remember to thank the older boy at some point.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At 9AM the next morning, he was at the train station. Gloved fingers laced and scarf almost covering his nose, to combat the cold. He was sat on the uncomfortable metal seats with his luggage between his legs, as he lazily eyed the stressed-looking travellers, around the busy station. He raised the scarf higher on the right side of his face, feeling the uncomfortable weight of a persistent gaze. It was the young female sat on his right, she looked to be about a few years younger than him.

He scowled, the girl kept ogling him, then pretending to be texting when he glared her way, he didn’t like her, at all. Her skirt was too short and her perfume too strong, most importantly –his brain supplied- she wasn’t Mingyu. He frowned at the last thought, why did he have to pop up in his thoughts uninvited _again_? It was stressful.

The middle aged balding man to his left, startled him, as he began talking too loudly on the phone, Wonwoo didn’t pay attention to his words, he was busy nervously tapping his foot. Ahead of him the display informed, that the train to Changwon would be departing in 5-minutes, yet his friends were nowhere to be seen. His phone vibrated.

 

**-I’m on the platform**

**-where you?**

**09:01AM**

 

He stood up, his eyes scanning the length of the platform. But he couldn’t see the other boy. Granted, it was crowded, with a lot of people going home for the holidays but Soonyoung had bright red hair, he was impossible to miss. He had a feeling they weren’t on the same platform, such a Soonyoung thing to do.

**-Which platform, Soonyoung?**

**09:02AM**

**-I’m on 4**

**09:02AM**

 

Wonwoo face-palmed, He was right.

 

**-Come to platform 9**

**-And quick**

**-Train’s leaving in 2 minutes**

**-RUN**

**09:03AM**

**-FUCK**

**09:03AM**

If he missed this train, he’d have to wait another 2-hours for the next one, he didn’t fancy doing that. He pocketed his phone, putting on his backpack and wheeling his suitcase to the closest carriage, because friend or not, he was getting on.

 

‘WAIT!’ He had one foot in the carriage, before he was yanked back by his bag, he wobbled dangerously but the suitcase managed to break his fall.

Wonwoo scowled deeply at the redhead, ‘was that necessary?’ He spat, gaze venomous.

‘YOU were gonna leave me’ he stated matter of fact-ly, and Wonwoo deadpanned. The final call for their train rang out and the boys jumped in before the doors slid shut. Luckily, they managed to find two vacant seats towards the back, Nice.

Their luggage went in the compartments above, before they sat down. Wonwoo slyly slid into the window seat, ignoring Soonyoung’s whining -serves him right for almost tripping him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The constant hum of the train and elapsing scenes of the mountainous land with its sparse greenery, were a soothing sight to Wonwoo’s tired eyes. He found his head drooping and his eyelids getting heavier, then he was elbowed harshly in the side, he screamed out in pain and a lady from two rows ahead, turned around to glare at him. In turn, he glared at Soonyoung who was pretending like he’d done nothing wrong, he twisted and pulled the redhead’s ear sharply. His friend was writhing in anguish as he mouthed apologies, but Wonwoo only let go when his face and hair were the same colour -red. 

He grinned in satisfaction, ‘where’s Jihoon?’, the thought suddenly crossed his mind, ‘studio.’ Soonyoung answered begrudgingly, ‘Oh.’ He nodded slowly, looking out the window again.

Then the shorter spoke again, hand still cupping his red ear with an angry pout, ‘Yeah… they used your lyrics, by the way. Suga hyung, liked them, apparently.’ He mumbled uninterested.

‘Wow, really?’ His eyes widened and he clapped his sweater paws in excitement.

Soonyoung threw him a dirty look, ‘you look dumb.’, he teased, arms crossed, ‘says the dumb one’ Wonwoo retorted childishly, then they stuck their tongues out at each other and made ugly faces. In the end though, they just laughed it off and started discussing more serious topics.

 

Like which power ranger was more superior -obviously red- and who’d look better in a dress -obviously Wonwoo. Now, they were arguing over height.

 

‘No, when you’re small, like Honnie, you can easily go around people, like through their legs and stuff, you’ll never be stuck in a human-jam again.’ Soonyoung stated his point enthusiastically.

‘Tall people can actually reach the top shelf.’, the taller boy countered, feeling proud of himself.

‘Short people are excellent hide-and-seekers, they can fit in the tiniest corners and spaces, no one will ever think to look there.’ The redhead fought back.

Wonwoo nodded, that was a good point. He raked his brain for something to counter with,

‘Well, tall people can go on all the rides at amusement parks and... and their feet actually touch the pedals in a car’

 

Silence. The redhead fought back a laugh,

 

‘Wonwoo, you’re _so_ running out of points, we’re talking short people not ones with dwarfism. That’s different.’ Soonyoung chuckled loudly at his friend's affronted expression,

‘I’m not running out, I’ve got plenty more points.’ He lied, crossing his arms and cursing at his brain to think.

‘Let’s hear ‘em’ Soonyoung mirrored his movements, crossing his arms as he waited,

 

Wonwoo blanked, he didn’t want to lose but Soonyoung was right, he had no more points.

‘Tall people are hot.’ He blurted the first thing that came to mind, then he held his chin up and looked away with mock-arrogance.

 

A pause, then came Soonyoung’s prodding tone,

 

‘Is Mingyu tall?’

 

Wonwoo nodded absently, then his head whipped to the side as he realised what he'd just admitted, greeted by a smug Soonyoung, wiggling his eyebrows.

‘Shut the fuck up.’ He spat with a glare, the redhead threw his hands up in surrender, ‘I didn’t say anything’ but the look in his eyes and the way he bit back a smile were already saying enough.

Wonwoo gave up the glaring, realising it had no effect on his best friend, -probably because he was so used to it by now- and looked at the passing trees, instead. From the placement of the sun in the centre of the sky he deduced it was around midday, they’d be home soon.

 

Thoughts of seeing his family after such long months, flooded his brain. He felt giddy at the thought, he couldn’t wait to hug his bratty brother, listen to his dad go on and on about politics and laugh at his mum’s bad jokes as he ate one of her warm home-cooked meals. He sighed, feeling nostalgic, only an hour or so left now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The boys parted ways at the station. Soonyoung walking off in the direction of the bus stop, while Wonwoo began wheeling his suitcase in the opposite direction. He was lucky his family home was only a 5-minute walk from the station, thank god.

A happy family reunion, full of hugs and kisses and pleasant conversations later, and it was already time for dinner. He argued with his brother over his ex-seat, which the brat claimed belonged to him now, since Wonwoo was no longer living with them. They fixed it peacefully, with a game of rock-paper-scissors, which Wonwoo won with a triumphant smirk. His brother was clearly sulking but didn’t squeak a word in complaint, rock-paper-scissors never lied, after all.

After feasting on dinner, the family sat down to watch some random Christmas themed movie. Mugs of hot chocolate, snacks and candles laid out on the coffee table, lights dimmed and curtains drawn. Both boys were cuddling with their mum on the sofa, since they couldn’t agree on who deserved it more. Their father was smiling at their silly, childish antics as he sipped on his tea from the single armchair across the room. It felt like he was back in his oblivious childhood days, surrounded by the warmth and love of his family.

Wonwoo was blissfully happy, a goofy grin painting his face as fell onto his galaxy themed bed covers in his galaxy themed old bedroom. He smiled as he recalled his galaxy phase, when he read books on astronomy and studied constellations. It was very short-lived, but it consumed him for a while.

 

Wonwoo got over it, eventually. Unfortunately, it seemed like his bedroom was still stuck in that era. Oh well.

 

 

 

 

 

On Sunday, Soonyoung and Jihoon asked him to join them for a Christmas party that one of their old high school classmates was throwing, but he opted out. Since he was still recovering from all the drinking on Thursday, instead he spent the day gift-shopping for people that he procrastinated on. Either because he forgot about them or he wasn’t sure what to get them.

His little brother decided to tag along, Wonwoo didn’t mind at first because he’d missed the trouble maker and thought it’d be fun to have some bro-time.

That thought, only lasted the first 30-minutes, ‘Oh My God!! Hyung remember that ONE time you peed your pants in public, sooo embarrassing. And the time you called Seulgi noona “oppa”, that was sooo—‘ his brother continued blabbing, he could’ve simply tuned him out and focused on browsing the shelves of candles.

But his brother’s voice was a touch too loud, a couple in the next isle snickered at him as they overheard the stories, that was the last straw.

 

‘OKAY!...’ he straightened his back towering over his chuckling brother, he put on the iciest glare he could manage, ‘Bohyuk, I’m gonna need you to shut up now.’

‘But hyung, YOU? peeing your pants is so funny, it’s even funnier cuz it’s YOU.’ He slapped Wonwoo’s chest as he laughed uncontrollably, the older boy scowled uncomfortably, ‘You weren’t even alive back then.’ Wonwoo himself, was barely two when that happened. His pregnant mum had attempted to train him out of diapers, but he was only a toddler and didn’t know any better.

‘It’s still funny, hyung. A-and the “Seulgi oppa” thing. I’m NEVER getting over that’ he continued to laugh, Wonwoo didn’t understand how people thought they looked alike. This crazed young man in front of him, with the joker-like grin, looked nothing like him. He was offended. 

‘You weren’t even there when it happened’ he mumbled embarrassed, as he brushed his brother’s hand off and grabbed the mango-scented candle. ‘Yeah, but Soonyoung hyung told me how it all went, is it true that you nearly peed yourself again?’ He shot him another glare and raised the candle threateningly.

 

Thankfully, his brother got the message and stopped telling the public embarrassing stories about him, instead he kept talking about other stuff.

 

Growing up, Bohyuk was always the chattier of the two, making new friends every day and never running out of things to say. Wonwoo on the other hand was unsurprisingly, the quieter brother, not bothering to speak unless spoken to. He didn’t care much for socialising and having a million friends, why would he, when there was so many interesting books to read.

Despite, their opposing personalities, they always got along well and cared deeply for the other. In a moment of reminiscent bliss, he ruffled his little brother’s hair and threw an arm over his shoulders. The younger complained, but then they both started laughing at nothing in particular, when they looked at each other.

 

It’s funny how little has changed over the years.

 

Tired from all the shopping, he was fast asleep even before 9PM. Before that, He’d wrapped up the gifts, putting away the ones that he’d be taking back to Seoul. Then came time for a pleasant family dinner. Granted, it wasn’t a feast like the previous night, it was still filling and delicious. 

He volunteered to do the cleaning and his brother kindly helped him out with it, while their parents talked about random relatives they should call. Wonwoo grimaced, he’d rather not be present for that.

After mumbling out some believable excuses, he went up to his room. Falling asleep as he read, just before 9PM. The knight from his book embraced him into the darkness, his brain retiring as his dream-world came to life.

Strangely, he subconsciously recalled the vague feeling of safety as he melted into the strong tanned arms of the canine-smiled knight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have writer's block. I've had this chapter ready for a least a week but I'm just not feeling it, you know?
> 
> BTW, I was really overwhelmed with the nice comments from the previous chapter, I appreciate all of you lovely readers (even the silent ones). You & my love for meanie are the only reason I haven't given up on this fic...
> 
> ANYWAYZ,  
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	22. Chapter 22

Monday morning hit him in the back of his head with the force of a speeding truck driver, or maybe that was Bohyuk who was currently lying on top of him. The younger boy was heavy, –even though, he didn’t look it- the weight crushing his lungs as he rudely screeched Christmas songs into his ear, while wiggling his whole body like a worm.

Wonwoo deeply scowled, this is NOT how he wanted his Christmas day to start. He shoved the excited kid off, walking to the bathroom as he ignored his brother’s cry of pain when he fell flat on the floor. He brushed his teeth and washed his face absentmindedly, hoping his day would get better.

 

 

 

 

 

When he came back up to his bedroom, it was already hours later and the sun looked about ready to duck under the horizon. Thankfully, his day had improved tremendously from the rude wake-up by Bohyuk. He began packing his barely unpacked suitcase again.

 

Earlier, the small family of four gathered around the laptop after a filling breakfast to Skype the grandparents. It was a heart-warmingly pleasant call and seeing them after so long filled him with a sense of joy and content, causing him to smile until his cheeks hurt.

However, his smile faltered a bit, when his aged grandparents expressed their excitement at seeing them later that day for their yearly family reunion. It was somewhat of a ritual at this point, having been a thing in his family since Wonwoo was a small child. He remembered how all the aunties, uncles and cousins would gather at his grandparents’ place on the outskirts of Busan. They’d spend anything from a few hours to a week with the extended family, reconnecting with relatives and meeting new ones, it was a good time.

At least to young Wonwoo it was, older Wonwoo didn’t think it was fun because now he’d have to socialise with cousins that he barely knew. He blanched when he realised he’d have to play nice with that one obnoxious auntie that painfully pinched his cheeks every year, while screaming “Wonho”.

It happened every year, she’d kiss and pull at his cheeks, disregarding how she always got the name wrong, and the fact that he was an adult now -one who didn’t appreciate such things at all.

Wonwoo truly loved his family, especially his grandparents. However, he despised loud social events and crowds and that’s exactly what this was. So although, he was looking forward to spending some time with his grandparents, he was also very much dreading it all.

He’d initially planned to come up with an elaborate excuse to avoid it all, something about an important work-related thing going wrong, he knew it would’ve worked too. But as he watched them through the screen of his father’s laptop, smiles on their wrinkled faces and delight shinning in their eyes at the prospect of seeing each other soon, he couldn’t bring himself to say it. It seemed selfish of him to satisfy his own introverted needs while upsetting them in the process.

 

Wonwoo couldn’t choose his own peace of mind over their happiness, especially when he’d be lying.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He seriously considered burning his brother’s birthday gift after seeing what the younger got him for Christmas. But he reasoned that his kid brother was a dumbass and that he wouldn’t stoop to his level. Which is why he settled for hiding the younger’s birthday gift at the back of the kitchen cupboard, behind the cleaning supplies –AKA the last place on earth that his sloppy brother would ever look in.

Then he went back upstairs to carry on packing, he gently placed the boxed Hogwarts mug, beside his brother’s dumb gift of underwear –he counted at least 20 and he didn’t even want to know how Bohyuk got his size spot on. The mug from his mother was definitely the highlight of his day, he’d been an avid fan of the book series since he could read –although, he thought he was over that phase.

Apparently not, since he remembered squealing and bouncing around when he opened the box, it was a really nice mug. The Hogwarts school crest stretched across the smooth surface in gold, while the maroon finish and the stylish handle had him itching to use it, immediately. It was embarrassing to admit being excited about Harry Potter at the age of 24, he shook his head and bit back a smile.

 

His phone vibrated from under a pile of laundry, after wrestling with the clothes he unlocked the phone and his shoulders deflated when he realised it was just spam. Then he frowned at his own reaction, what was he even expecting?

He threw himself on the galaxy bed covers and rolled onto his stomach, face buried into the pillow as he pouted. A thumb scrolling through his chats, as he desperately sought a distraction from his impending demise, at the thought of the reunion. With his thumb hovering over the latest chat, he slowly scrolled lower to the fourth chat and clicked it, uncertainly.

The last message was sent on the 20th, that was five days ago and Wonwoo really wanted to change that. But he wasn’t too sure whether to initiate a conversation, he didn’t even know how people did that, since his friends always messaged first. Deep in his conflicted thoughts, he typed the first thing that came to his head and pressed send, before his brain even reached a conclusion.

**-Why are you ignoring me?**

**17:49pm**

 

Too late to change his mind, he just closed his eyes and laid still on his bed.

 

**-I’m not.**

**17:55pm**

**-You SO are.**

**-Why haven’t I heard of you since Thursday, then?**

**17:56pm**

**-I’ve been busy**

**17:59pm**

**-that’s what they all say**

**-busy ignoring me, huh?**

**-like last time...**

**18:01pm**

**-my phone was BROKEN last time**

**-it wasn’t on purpose.**

**18:02pm**

**- & I’m supposed to believe that crappy excuse?**

**18:03pm**

**-it’s the TRUTH**

**18:03pm**

**-So was my excuse**

**-But SOMEone wasn’t believing it**

**18:05pm**

**-I thought we agreed to put this behind us**

**18:09pm**

**-Sorry…**

**-Got carried away**

**-SOOO, why’re you ignoring me this time?**

**18:11pm**

**-I TOLD YOU I WASN’T.**

**18:14pm**

**-And?**

**-Usually normal people explain at this point...**

**18:16pm**

**-Are you saying I’m abnormal?**

**18:17pm**

**-Isn’t that synonymous with Kim Mingyu?**

**-And stupid.**

**18:19pm**

**-okay**

**-I’m ignoring you from NOW**

**18:24pm**

**-No, you’re not**

**-You’re gonna call me right now**

**-I need to ask you something**

**18:25pm**

 

Wonwoo sent the last text and threw his phone on the bed as he finished packing the rest of his belongings, since he’d be heading straight to Seoul after the family reunion.

 

 

 

 

He definitely wasn’t expecting his phone to start buzzing with an incoming call, less than 5-minutes later. Could it be Mingyu? One glance at his screen told him it was. Why didn’t he call him straight away? He didn’t even really have anything to tell him, though.

 

‘So why were you ignoring me?’

He fought back a laugh as he sat on his bed, back resting against the head board. Mingyu groaned over the phone, he sounded tired and slightly irritated -exactly where Wonwoo was trying to get him.

 

‘I did NOT ignore you, Wonwoo. STOP saying that.’

 

His heart fluttered at the sound of his name on Mingyu’s tongue, he missed that.

‘Since when did you start calling me by my first name, also what makes you think you can boss me around?’

 

‘Sorry, HYUNG. Happy now? Geez’, the younger seemed incredibly sulky at this point, but Wonwoo was salty about being ignored so he kept pushing.

 

‘I never said I disliked you calling me by my first name’

 

‘Well, you never said you like it either, so make up your mind. Do you wanna be called Wonwoo or hyung?’

Damn, when did he get so brave with him? He never demanded things in such a commanding tone before -Wonwoo had to admit it was kinda hot.

 

‘I don’t fucking care. Call me whatever you want.’

Wrong choice, apparently.

 

‘Cool... squishy.’

 

‘Except that.’, he wished he could erase that name from existence but alas, it seemed Kim Mingyu was hooked on it. He only hoped the other wouldn’t use it in public.

Mingyu’s chuckles were so heart-warming and he didn’t realise how much he’d missed hearing it, until now. Then, the younger sobered up. ‘How’re you feeling?’

‘Umm good?’ Random. That kind of threw him off guard, who asks that in the MIDDLE of a conversation?

‘You sound unsure. Should I be worried?’

 

‘Would you come running to me if I said yes.’ Wonwoo decided to troll a little, thrown off guard again at the unexpected answer.

‘If only you knew.’, Mingyu mumbled humourlessly.

 

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

 

‘Nothing.’ It was NOT nothing, but the younger didn’t sound like he wanted to elaborate so Wonwoo let it go, for now.

 

‘Okayyy... so why were you ignoring me?’

 

‘For goodness sake, Jeon Wonwoo. I. was. not.’

Dang it. Even his full name sounded good, coming from him -he had a Mingyu bias, sue him.

 

‘Then EXPLAIN, you fucking moron.’

 

‘You’re such a sweetheart.’, the younger retorted sarcastically. ‘I was busy with the wedding, if you must know.’

‘For nearly 4 whole days?’, he didn’t hold back the suspicious tone in his voice.

‘On Friday. Believe it or not, I slept through the whole day after I got to my parents’ place… I kinda had a… long night, before that.’

Mingyu. The early bird, who went for jogs at dawn and cooked breakfast before 8am. Slept the whole day? Wonwoo called bullshit. He felt like the younger boy was lying to him, or at least not telling him the whole truth. But he didn’t want to pick a fight so he kept his thoughts to himself. He listened intently as the younger calmly continued.

‘Saturday, my cousin and I spent the whole day making sure everything was going to be perfect for the ceremony. And on Sunday, it was the wedding itself. That’s like a whole day event, so yeah.’

 

‘And today?’

For some reason, Mingyu’s answers weren’t satisfying him -it didn’t take that long to send a text.

 

‘It’s Christmas Day, Wonwoo. I was busy doing family stuff. Merry Christmas by the way. What did you get up to?’. Leave it to Mingyu to side-track him successfully, every time.

‘Woke up, opened gifts, ate food. Now I’m meant to be packing to head down to my grandparents’ place.’

Wonwoo’s day in a nutshell. Although, he made it sound boring, he was very much pleased with how the day went. He liked all the gifts –except the lifetime supply of underwear, but it could’ve been worse- and he enjoyed the family time, his mum’s cooking was always great too. He even got to hear Mingyu’s soothing husky drawl, so he had zero complaints about the day thus far.

 

‘What’s happening there?’ The younger sounded interested, Wonwoo’s tone was dead in comparison.

 

‘All the relatives and extended family chill there for a day or so. It’s a yearly thing.’ He sighed, not looking forward to all the chitchat and backchat, he didn’t appreciate being made to talk with people. Regardless, of how much DNA they shared.

 

‘You have a lot of “yearly things”, don’t you?’ He could be wrong, but the younger boy sounded kind of sad -a hint of jealousy tucked away in his tone.

 

‘I guess.’, he mumbled with a shrug, then quickly changed the subject.

‘How did the wedding go?’

‘It went... fine. Until the top part of the cake toppled on the bride’s mum. Other than that, I think everything went according to plan.’

 

Wonwoo’s laughing fit began with a few harmless chuckles, then quiet snickers until he couldn’t hold it in anymore and burst out laughing.

‘OH MY GOD… So was there no cake?’

He barely managed to collect himself, as he felt a tear roll down his cheek at the image of a shrieking woman covered in cake. It was so funny -or maybe he had a strange sense of humour.

 

‘I can’t believe you’re laughing at such a tragedy.’, the younger sounded genuinely surprised at his reaction.

‘It’s fucking hilarious, wish I was there to see it.’, Wonwoo defended his opinion.

‘You wouldn’t find it funny if it happened at your wedding.’, the younger pointed out seriously. Wonwoo contemplated for a millisecond then he voiced his honest opinion,

‘Nah actually, weddings are usually too serious and emotional, I think it’d be funny if something like that happened.’

‘I would HATE it.’, Mingyu immediately countered with the opposing thought.

 

‘That’s why we’re not getting married.’

 

A pause. Then Mingyu’s strained voice.

‘Why would you even say that?'

 

‘Haven’t you noticed how much we disagree on things? Usually people like us don’t get along well.’

Wonwoo didn’t even realise how true that statement was until he’d said it. He struggled to recall an occasion when the two of them didn’t bicker and disagree on something. But they also smoothed things out pretty quickly and had some really amiable moments too. 

 

‘But we DO get along.’ Mingyu sounded almost confused as he said that. Like he wasn’t sure whether they were on the same page.

‘You’re not wrong.’, the older of the two admitted, very quietly. 

‘Why can’t you just say I’m right?’, he whined. Wonwoo could imagine his adorable pout and he bit back a smile.

‘Fuck off.’

 

A slapping sound, it sounded like Mingyu face-palmed himself.

‘Did you just literally face-palm?’ Wonwoo snorted.

‘YES.’, Mingyu sounded just about DONE.

‘Idiot.’

 

‘Hyung, my grandfather once told me that opinions are important because not everyone thinks the same way. He said differences make people stronger. Because it teaches empathy and open-mindedness.’

He felt that. It sounded a lot like Soonyoung and Jihoon, the pair literally never agreed on anything yet their relationship was stronger than most people’s.

‘Being different and disagreeing is only a problem when you don’t listen.’, Mingyu finished thoughtfully.

‘Your grandfather is a wise man.’

 

‘Was. He passed away when I was 10.’

 

‘How do you even remember that, then?’

 

‘Most people would say something like “Awww, I’m sorry for your loss”, but not you, I guess.’ Mingyu chuckled, Wonwoo felt bad.

 

He really did, he wasn’t trying to be rude. But he guessed it came out like that, anyway.

‘Oh... I’m really sorry. I wasn’t trying to be insensit-‘

 

‘SHHH. I meant it in a good way. You’re different from others, it’s refreshing. I like it.’

BOOM. BOOM. The deafening sound of his heart banging in his chest, he was blushing as he felt his face heat up -and not for the first time during this conversation, either.

‘Ummm thanks?’

 

‘You’re welcome.’

 

There was a lull in conversation and he suddenly remembered something.

 

 

 

‘My mum kept mentioning you...’

Wonwoo voiced his curiosity, remembering how she’d sneakily mention the boy on every little occasion. Like how she’d strolled into the kitchen this morning after breakfast and randomly said, ‘I’m so happy you seem to be putting on weight, you’ve been eating better?’ He nodded as he placed the final mug on the drying rack. It was true that he’d been gaining some weight, looking much healthier and more alive than he did in a while, and he was also happy about that. But he couldn’t understand why she added the next part, ‘How’s that lovely boy, Mingyu, doing these days?’. ‘Good’ he’d muttered confused, escaping the kitchen.

 

‘Really? Send her my well wishes.’

 

Both his mum and Mingyu were acting like they were super close. Wonwoo was so confused, it was literally ONE phone call -what the hell did they talk about to warrant acting like this?

 

‘She usually doesn’t take such an interest in my friends, though. So it’s weird.’

 

‘Awww, we’re friends now, yaaay' 

Of course, the younger wasn’t being serious –it seemed side tracking Wonwoo was his favourite pass time, but this time the older boy wouldn’t allow himself to be easily swayed.

 

‘No, you’re my bitch and I need to know why my mum keeps asking about you.’

 

The younger’s muffled giggles, then his sweet husky voice. ‘Why don’t you ask her yourself?’ He teased, cheeky.

 

‘I TRIED. She won’t tell me anything. So WHAT did you two talk about that day?’

Frustration was building up in him, he could feel it. What’s the secret? He hated not knowing.

 

‘Wonwoo, you’re a great guy and I really like you.’ The younger began in a regretful tone. The fuck was this coming from?

 

‘Why are you suddenly telling me this?’

 

‘Because if you keep asking what we talked about, then I’m gonna have to end this call.’

 

His mouth gaped open at the threat. Wow, it was that deep?

‘Whyyy? I just wanna know’

 

‘Shhh. You’re not a 2-year-old, stop acting cute.' 

Mingyu might’ve just been making fun of him, since he had the upper hand. But that didn’t mean his heart didn’t go crazy for the “cute” part.

 

‘And you say I’M the meanie.’

Sarcasm leaked into his voice, he was aware that he was whining and being bratty. But he had the right to know, he was sure their conversation was about him -he couldn’t think of anything else a 56-year-old woman and a 23-year-old man could have in common.

 

‘I’ll tell you... someday.’

Wistfully hopeful. Were the words he’d use to describe Mingyu’s tone right now. How strange.

 

Wonwoo was just about to whine some more, when his mother’s shout from downstairs stole his attention.

‘YEEES MUM?’

He shouted back, hearing a grimace in his ear when he forgot to move the phone away. Whoops.

 

‘DONE PACKING YET? WE HAVE TO LEAVE NOW.’

 

Already? he glanced at the time. **19:33pm** , they were on the phone for almost an hour. Damn, it didn’t even feel that long.

 

‘GIMME 2 SECONDS, I’LL BE RIGHT DOWN.’

 

He stood up, putting the phone back to his ear and sighing.

 

‘Did you really have to scream like that? I think my eardrum popped.’

 

‘I’ll warn you next time.’ Wonwoo answered, distracted.

 

‘I’d rather you don’t scream in my ear at all. You sound like a choking banshee.’

The younger giggled at his own joke, Wonwoo finished zipping up the last of his bags and took it to the door. He scanned his childhood bedroom one more time -in case he forgot something- as he waited for Mingyu’s giggles to die down.

 

‘You do realise that wasn’t funny, like at all.’ 

More giggling, then a deep breath. ‘Well _I_ think it was… Anyway, you leaving now?’

‘Yeah, just getting my things in the car.’

He replied as he toe-d his trainers half-way on, his little brother helping him load his luggage into their dad’s car. Wonwoo leaned against the side of it, putting his shoes on properly as he let them handle the loading.

‘When’re you coming back to Seoul?’ was the younger’s next question, Wonwoo paused to think for a moment before he replied slowly, ‘Tomorrow night. My train leaves at 6:15pm. You?’

 

‘I miss you, Wonwoo.’ A shiver ran down his rigid spine at the younger’s words. Where was that coming from? Why was Mingyu so bloody random all the time, did he not know how he was nearly putting Wonwoo into a cardiac arrest with his sporadic flirting. Probably not.

 

‘Mingyu, why do you always avoid questions? It’s not even a hard one, you don’t make sense.’

His mum’s head shot up at the mention of the boy’s name and she stopped organising the luggage as she tiptoed next to her son, trying to hear the conversation.

 

‘I’m not avoiding. I was suddenly overwhelmed with feels, I just had to say it.’

The kid sounded... genuine. Wonwoo wanted to believe, but there was always something stopping him from reading too much into the younger’s words. Probably his brain, trying to protect his heart.

‘Hold on, I think my mum wants to talk to you.’ 

‘Nice, give her the phone then.’

Wow. Really? Why does he sound so excited? He handed his mum the phone with a frown and even _she_ looked excited. This was too weird, at least he could figure out what they talk about if he listened in.

 

Or not. 

 

His father chose that exact moment to call him into the house. Great, he thought as he rolled his eyes.

The scowl on his face deepened as he stomped back inside, leaving his mum and Mingyu on the phone together.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was a long Chapter... phew.  
> I love meanie <3
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	23. Chapter 23

Wonwoo loved sleep, he could just never get enough of it. No matter how many hours he spent in bliss, wrapped around the dark blanket of unconsciousness. The more he dreamily dove into the depths of sleep, the more he wanted to delve deeper.

Sleep, in certain situations was his closest ally but it could also be his greatest downfall. Often times it dictated his mood and directly correlated with his patience and demeanour. Depending on how much sleep he managed to get, he could be either amiable and forgiving or snappy and harsh. The difference in his moods was so tangible that even he noticed the change.

 

Therefore, Wonwoo valued his sleep, sleep was precious to him, sleep was very important.

 

That feeling of melting into a soft mattress as his heavy lids slipped shut, was something he could always count on and look forward to after a long day. It was also one of the sweetest things he’d ever felt. He was lucky in the sense that, he never had too many issues with falling asleep, despite insomnia, being something half of the Jeon family suffered from.

Unfortunately, when faced with unfamiliar conditions the insomnia surfaced. Especially, when he was surrounded by people that he didn’t really feel comfortable with and on top of all that, forced to share a bed with one of them. That night Wonwoo knew he wouldn’t be getting a wink of sleep. 

 

Slipping out of bed quietly, he sat out on the garden swing seat and lost himself in thought as he gazed at the night sky. Last time he checked his charging phone it was an hour or two past midnight and no matter how much he tossed and turned, sleep evaded him.

The sky was clear tonight, twinkling with tiny bright stars, they looked like precious gemstones. The breeze was cold, even under all his layers, he pushed his round glasses back up the bridge of his nose. Suddenly grateful for his decision to wear boots, instead of his slippers.

He traced random constellations in the starry sky, finding some shapes but not quite remembering what they meant. His tired eyes kept observing the unpolluted rural skies, it was so different from the city views, which he was used to. Back there, beautiful starry nights like this one were only mythical, they simply didn’t have a place in reality. So even when his craning neck started to cramp and his runny nose began to feel numb, he still continued to stare up at the night sky.

Enthralled. So much so, that he failed to hear the creak of the swing seat as it protested the extra weight. Failed to smell the pleasant floral scent as it wafted into his nostrils. Failed to notice the warmth by his side until it was leaning into him.

 

Wonwoo startled and flinched back, eyes wide and limbs drawn into his chest in an almost foetal position, he heard a small giggle and his shoulders instantly deflated. It was his mother, he slowly relaxed into her side as she gently began carding her warm hands through his long locks. 

‘Don’t you think it’s time for a haircut, sweety.’ Her soft voice travelled to his frost-bitten ears, soothing his mind with its sweet tone.

‘Maybe, I don’t really know if I want to though’ he mumbled his answer as the fingers started massaging at his scalp and he closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling. ‘How’d you know I was out here?’, his voice sounded distant, his mother scoffed light-heartedly.

‘It happens every year, darling.’ True, it did happen every year, because he wasn’t comfortable enough to fall asleep around others, his brain wouldn’t let him. –The only exception to that rule, was family and the closest of friends.

He huffed lazily, slightly irritated at his self for having this discriminatory insomnia, that caused his inability to fall asleep in uncomfortable situations. It was such an inconvenience.

 

His mother’s easy tone, pulled him out of his self-loathing. 

‘Remember when you started kindergarten, the teachers would always complain that you never went to sleep at nap time. And the babysitter could never get you to bed either, you’d be up until your father or I got back home.’ 

He smiled, recalling how he’d stay up playing video games or reading books until his parents got home. He was the reason his mother was forced to finish work early, until he reached the age of 16 and no longer needed a babysitter, because he just refused to sleep with a stranger in the house.

‘I’d come home at 10 or 11 sometimes, Hyukie would be fast asleep and this determined kid would be sat next to him, glaring, pouting, wide-awake.’

His nose scrunched up as he laughed at the image, 7-year-old Wonwoo was one weird kid.

‘You know what’s really strange though?’ she continued, sounding intrigued as she cuddled her adult son. Wonwoo hummed, signalling for her to continue. 

‘Really strange, the moment I got home, you’d get in your bed and I’d kiss you both goodnight… and you’d be out cold, scarily fast. Isn’t that strange, Wonie?’

 

Wonwoo chuckled at the memory, it WAS weird. But he couldn’t help it either, it’s how he felt. Having his mother come home after a few long hours with a stranger, put his paranoid mind at ease and made him feel safe, which is why he fell asleep as fast as he did. He verbalised those thoughts and his mother giggled, as he named the people that made him feel safe enough to fall asleep, less than 10 in total.

‘… then there’s you and Soonyoung. That’s it.’

‘Aren’t you forgetting someone, Woowoo?’ She teased, he swears his mum had the weirdest nicknames for him, what was a “woowoo”. He frowned sitting up and pushing his hair back to expose his forehead –quite pointless since the strands fell right back down, at least they weren’t in his eyes anymore.

 

His features furrowed in thought, and he went through the names again in his head, ‘Nope… I don’t think I’ve forgotten anyone.’

 

‘Sure?’ Wonwoo looked to his mum with a tilted head, her eyes were twinkling knowingly and he was beginning to feel a little bit terrified. ‘Who am I forgetting?’ he stuttered, unsure whether he even wanted to know.

If the mischievous smile on his mother’s face was anything to go by, he wasn’t going to like it. ‘Why that lovely boy, you spent the night with a while ago…’

Wonwoo frowned, the way his mother said, “spent the night with” made it seem like he’d been doing non-platonic things, how would his mum know anyway. Sure, she knew of his sexual orientation and supported him fully, but he never told her about the guys he was with, not that he’d “been” with anyone worth mentioning in the recent half-decade.

The puzzlement was clear on his pale face, as his mother gave him a smile, that could only be described as an evil smirk. ‘I’ll give you a clue, then. The name starts with M and ends with -ingyu. Any ideas?’

‘MUM!’ she was full-on laughing now as he sported a scandalised expression, why was she talking like that about Mingyu? And why was everyone he knew, including his mum, so damn weird.

 

‘What do you mean? I don’t get it. What about him?’ he asked in his best bored tone, arms and legs crossed as he faced his still smiling mother. A look he’d seen before, yet couldn’t quite identify was shining in her dark eyes –almost as if she knew something very obvious that he didn’t.

‘He told me some things, while we had our lovely chat and I-’ He knew it was rude as he cut her off -but he was close with his mum, so she didn’t mind.

‘What did you two talk about? –actually I know it was about me, just tell me what you said about me.’ he demanded, frowning. His mum feigned innocence as she looked down, inspecting her purple nails.

‘Sorry sweety, no can do. I promised to not tell you, ask Mingyu.’ She shrugged, blatantly disregarding the rising frustration in her son’s voice.

‘Muuuuuuuuum, come on… Mingyu’s a little bitch, he’s not saying anything.’ He hugged her arm and curled into her side, his mum loved hugs and affection so it usually worked. But as it seemed, luck wasn’t on his side tonight, because all he got was a light-hearted slap to his arm with an amused ‘Language.’

Wonwoo couldn’t believe he was being babied at 24 –Mingyu really was a bitch for causing this, he made a mental note to let him know.

 

His mind wandered back to that night, he remembered being incredibly sleepy, knocking out-cold while the younger boy showered. He also remembered that he slept very well and woke up fairly rested. Pouting, he realised with little shock that his mum was right, there was no way he’d have fallen asleep so peacefully if he didn’t feel safe with Mingyu.

Which was absurd, because it’s been barely a month since they even started being friendly. Since when did he trust people so easily?

Kim Mingyu isn’t “people”, he found himself answering, subconsciously.

And honestly, he found the thought to be true. Mingyu was different from the beginning, so caring and lovable, he’d been nothing but kind to him, even when Wonwoo mistreated him. It didn’t even take Wonwoo that long to come to terms with the fact that he liked him. So really, it’s no wonder he trusts him as much as he does.

 

The icy wind suddenly picked up, blowing directly on his frosty face and he shivered. His mum gently stroked his hair as she began talking in a concerned voice, ‘Wonwoo, let’s go to bed, sweety’ he whined, eyes closed as he mumbled, ‘You know I won’t be able to sleep unless you’re there.’ 

‘My bed is quite small, darling.’ His mother voiced regrettably, ‘We can squeeze?’ he suggested hopefully -Despite his extreme exhaustion, he didn’t fail to cringe at how childish he sounded, even to his own ears.

‘Well, I’m sharing a room with your aunt and her 2 daughters, so I’m not sure if they’ll appreciate a grown man being a mama’s boy but-’ He cut her off again, blaming it on the sleepiness this time.

‘Muuuuuuuuum, pleeease.’ He pouted and looked up at her with his practised crestfallen expression. She sighed and ruffled his hair, ‘Go on, then.’

 

Shaking her head, as she watched a wide smile stretch over her son’s face, she started talking in a loving tone, ‘sometimes I forget you’re older than Hyukie’. Wonwoo pulled a mock-offended look as he immediately sprung up, pulling at his mother’s arm, to hurry up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He was on the edge of consciousness, approaching the end of his sleep cycle, when a pair of hushed voices registered in his barely waking brain.

‘You do it’ a girl’s voice whispered, the sweet tone sounded familiar but his half-asleep brain, was useless at the moment.

‘Nooo, you’re older so you do it’ another girl whined, sounding much younger.

He mentally furrowed his eyebrows in thought, he knew this high-pitched slightly nasally voice. He relaxed his face, cracking an eye open to spy on the girls. That’s when he realised he was lying on his side, facing a large window, curtains only half drawn.

Fortunately, the natural light streaming in through the big window wasn’t blinding at all. But rather glowing gently in the way the receding afternoon light did. It made him wonder how long he’d been asleep.

 

‘Ok, let’s do it together’ 

‘Eonni, I’m scaaared. What if he gets mad?’

He could clearly hear their bickering voices from behind him, but since they weren’t in his line of vision he couldn’t figure out exactly who they were.  

‘I’m scared too, but auntie said we have to wake him.’ The less whinny girl stated. Sounding more mature than the younger one.

‘You do it.’

A huff of irritation followed by a firm order, ‘Somi, we’re doing it together, come on’

 

Somi? A light-bulb switched on in his head, when he eventually learnt their identity. Somin and Somi, the cousins that his mum mentioned she was sharing a room with.

He was shocked at how much they’ve changed, just by their voices, it sounded to him like they’ve grown up a lot. Last time he’d heard the younger’s voice, she was barely 10 and that was almost seven years ago now. So he could be forgiven for not being able to recognise it.

 

‘Ok ok, so how are we doing this?’ It was Somi’s voice, much closer this time.

‘Well, there’s a spider-’

‘OH MY GOD, WHERE?!’ He internally cringed at the shrill volume, the girls had moved to the foot of the bed. He continued pretending to sleep, as he listened closely.

‘Shhhhhhh... it’s an imaginary spider, you dummy’

‘Ohhhhhh, phew. You should’ve said, eonni.’

‘You freaked out before I could.’ There was an eye roll in Somin’s voice, he could hear it clearly.

‘So you need to freak out, like you did now but louder-’

‘How much louder?’ The younger interrupted, ‘Much much louder, like much louder. Then I’ll freak out too and we’re both gonna jump on him, hard.’

 

Not a bad plan, he mused. He was sure he’d wake up scarred and thoroughly shocked, if he hadn’t already been up.

 

‘How hard?’

‘Hard hard, like hard.’

‘Ok, hard. But When?’ Somi asked and Wonwoo perked up, he needed to hear this too, so he could avoid being crushed.

‘We’ll jump at the same time, I’ll do a silent countdown-’ the younger cut her off, again, ‘Eonni, how do I hear it, if it’s silent?’

‘You have a point there. Ummm... I’ll use my fingers to count down.’ The older girl sounded very proud of herself at the solution and Wonwoo had to fight to keep a straight face.

‘Good idea, eonni.’ Her voice sounded impressed.

‘I know, I got all the smarts from mum and dad.’

‘And I got all the looks.’

 

These girls were weird, he couldn’t even imagine having such a weird conversation with his brother. They just wouldn’t.

 

‘As if, clearly you’re blind. Everyone can see who the prettier sister is.’

‘Yeeeah, and it’s ME, eonni.’ He almost snorted at the sass in the younger’s voice, her sister gasped, ‘It’s NOT and the world knows it too, now shush, you’re getting distracted’

‘So were you...’ she mumbled, a hint of bratty-ness to her tone, that told Wonwoo the younger was used to getting her way.

Then, the older sister went through their elaborate plan of waking him up again, ‘Any questions?’ She asked once she was done.

‘Yeah, why is Wonwoo-oppa still asleep at 3pm?’ The judgmental tone was very evident in her voice, he scowled as her voice took on a more serious tone, gasping, she whispered, ‘Do you think he died in his sleep?’

‘Don’t be ridiculous, Somi.’ He heard a slapping sound and a whimper of pain, before the younger spoke again.

‘What?! It’s possible, I read about it and it even has a name -sleepeenar or something like that’

 

Sleepeenar? He had a good idea what Somi was referring to and honestly, he was surprised she even knew about it, but the mistake was hilarious and he let slip a quiet snort. Thankfully, the pair were engaged in yet another bicker-fest so they didn’t seem to notice.

 

‘Oh yeah, and what does it mean then?’

‘I dunno, I forgot.’

‘You don’t even know what it is, yet “it’s possible”? Stop being silly.’ The older girl sounded just about done, as she shut down her sister’s claims. 

‘But I swear I read it somewhe-’

‘Can you even read?’ Harsh.

‘Of course I can rea-’

It was the younger’s turn to be cut off, ‘Then how come you don’t know what you “read”?’

 

‘It meant... something to do with tissues and biology stuff’ she stuttered, Wonwoo felt sorry for her, she sounded so down.

Somin scoffed and the younger girl huffed in annoyance. Wonwoo decided he had no time to waste waiting for the siblings to wake him up, so he shot up in bed with alarming speed. An ear-splitting shrill noise followed, the girls both stumbling over each other in their effort to get away. They were now staring wide-eyed at him from a tangle of limbs on the floor.

They resembled his editorial team back in Seoul, with how shocked and terrified they were at seeing him. He shook his head with a low chuckle and Somi visibly flinched, accidentally elbowing her sister in the gut.

The older sent her a murderous glare and an argument ensued between the pair.

He was glad him and Bohyuk weren’t this hostile towards each other, but then again, these girls had a much bigger age gap so it was understandable. He just had one thing to say to them, something he’d been itching to say since he stopped pretending to be asleep.

 

‘Hey, Somin...’ he voiced clearly, the older girl stopped terrorising her sister and turned to him, face taking on an innocent smile. Which quickly turned sour, when he voiced the next part, ‘Sleep Apnoea IS a real condition, it happens when the throat muscles relax, stopping the person from breathing in their sleep and people actually die from it.’

The younger girl’s eyes widened comically, ‘SO I WAS RIGHT!!’ Her expression was bright and her small face full of animated life and energy. He nodded at her with a small smile and left the sisters to their bickering, ‘thank you, oppa.’ He heard the younger’s sugar-coated, cute tone before he took the stairs down to the kitchen.

 

If he was asked to describe the Jeon sisters, -his father’s brother’s daughters and therefore his first cousins. Then, two words would instantly come to mind, loud and energetic, that summed up the sisters.

Somin was the same age as Bohyuk and Somi was 8 years younger than himself. He remembered the long summers they used to spend at their grandparents place every year. Playing together and having slumber parties with other kids. He remembers being relatively close with them, until the girls moved to Canada when he was 11 years old. Then, he remembers only occasionally seeing them at weddings and some yearly reunions.

So really, he didn’t remember much, but he still felt a pang of something akin to sadness when Somi hugged him tightly on the way to the train station. He realised he’d miss the lovable cousins and the rest of his family, emotion rose to his throat and he focused on the scenery beyond the train’s window.

 

 

 

When the train finally arrived back in Seoul at 10:30pm he was feeling sleepy again. Despite having woken up at 3pm, he’d still managed to spend some quality time with his extended family. After a small meal, he joined in to play his grandfather’s favourite board game, naturally losing every time since he never really understood how the ancient game worked. He was paying more attention to his grandfather, as he re-told intriguing stories of growing up during the Korean war.

Then he spent about an hour or so with his mum and grandmother in the kitchen, being utterly useless as he watched them cook. But he did enjoy the conversations, although, some were quite embarrassing recollections of the past. Soon, it was time for him to leave his childhood memories and beloved family for a journey to the north.

Thankfully, there weren’t any tears on his part, he couldn’t say the same for his mother, whom had always been the emotional type. As the coastal city shrunk away in the distance, skyscrapers and modern industrialisation giving way to coarse mountains and sparse vegetation, he finally heaved a sigh in relief. Wonwoo had successfully avoided that one obnoxious auntie, for the first time in years and he couldn’t believe his luck.

 

 

Knowing the lack of anything edible in his apartment, he went on a mini convenience store raid. Hauling his suitcases as well as bags of shopping back to his apartment, proved to be a difficult task and a dumb idea. His purchases of random snacks, decently-sized stack of instant ramen as well as similarly unhealthy things, weren’t exactly heavy. However, they made walking harder as they did take up a lot of space both in the plastic bags and in his diet, since he hardly ate “normal” food. Not because he enjoyed harming his body, but because he lacked the culinary skills required to do anything beyond heating things up in a microwave.

Maybe he could try taking a few cooking lessons in the new year, eat healthier, be more social and become a better person. He snorted at his unattainable thoughts, the whole “new year, new me” trend, never really worked for him. He always ended up eating ramen, sitting on his ass for most of the day and avoiding humans like the plague, anyway.

 

 

 

That night, as he fell asleep on fresh sheets, freshly showered and in his comfiest velvet-lined brown hoodie, he wished next year would be different from the rest. Not that he hated his life or anything, it just felt like the right time for things to develop.

 

Wonwoo wanted change, and he had a pretty good idea where he could get just that, if only it was that easy to have a whole human being to himself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some serious progress will happen in the next few chapters, this one's a bit of a filler chapter tbh. I think the girls are cute & I love how Wonwoo has this soft spot for his family even though he's not a big fan of socialising, so coot.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	24. Chapter 24

**-What’s up?**

**11:37am**

**-Nothing.**

**11:40am**

Wonwoo typed back, his answer just as simple as the question. Putting his coat on and heading to the elevator. His phone buzzed as he got on.

 

**-Ok, lemme try that again.**

**-What are you doing?**

**11:43am**

**-Just deciding whether I should ditch my friend or not.**

**-It’s too cold outside.**

**11:44am**

 

The reply was almost instant, but he put his phone away as he crossed the road and began walking to his destination.

 

**-You’re meeting someone?**

**-For lunch?**

**11:45am**

**-Yeah.**

**11:49am**

**-Wonwoo, I thought that was OUR thing.**

**11:52am**

**-LMAO.**

**-Stop being dramatic, you’re not even here.**

**11:56am**

 

The pedestrian light turned green, he pocketed his phone again, weaving his way through the rushing crowd of people, he was finally on the main road.

 

**-I AM though.**

**12:03pm**

**-You are?**

**-You didn’t even tell me...**

**12:07pm**

**-Sorry, I only just got back**

**-you were the first person I wanted to see too**

**12:08pm**

Honestly speaking, he didn’t know whether Mingyu meant it or whether he was just being his normal flirty self. But he sure as hell wanted to believe the sweet words.

 

**-LIAR.**

**-I can’t anyway, I’ve got plans.**

**12:11pm**

**-You never believe me**

**12:14pm**

 

He could almost hear the whine and he giggled unintentionally, as he finally made it to the meeting point he’d agreed on with his college friend. Realising he was the first to arrive, he took out his phone to reply.

 

**-Cuz you’re always lying.**

**12:17pm**

**-No, it’s because you’re such a meanie.**

**-Who are you meeting anyway?**

**-They can’t be more important than me.**

**12:22pm**

 

If only he knew how true, that was. It’s scary how quickly the younger boy wormed his way into his heart, becoming more important than most others, in such a short period of time. The truth scared him, so he stuck with his tried and tested method of rudeness.

 

**-None of your business.**

**-BYE.**

**12:23pm**

**-Rude.**

**12:25pm**

 

Just as he read the latest message, he recognised the smiling figure walking towards him. Looking all smart and professional, -which was a joke, considering this guy used to be the class clown- was his college friend that he hadn’t seen in over a year.

Im Changkyun -or Kyun as he liked to call him- was one of the few friends he’d made in college and managed to keep in touch with over the years. Although, their meetings were incredibly rare -since he worked for some hotshot company in Hong Kong and hardly had the time to fly over to Seoul. Hence, making it impossible for the college friends to meet up more regularly. 

 

‘Wow, Jeon Wonwoo. You keep getting more sexy every time I see you, man.’ 

They did their elaborate bro handshake that they’d come up with back in their uni days. Wonwoo didn’t even bat an eye to the other’s easily misinterpreted greeting. Knowing that it was just friendly banter between them, it also helped that he knew Kyun had always been the kind of guy that came with a broken filter and a knack for hysterics.

‘You’re not looking too bad yourself, did you stop drinking your milk, though? I don’t think you’ve grown since graduation’, Wonwoo painted on a mock-concerned look as he patted the shorter boy on the head.

‘Good one.’

Kyun shot him heart fingers as he winked at him, and he looked so ridiculous that they both ended up laughing at the other.

 

After They were done laughing, they fist-bumped and walked down the road together, -to this really good beef place that they frequented in college- all while playing verbal catch up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘You think?’ He asked with a tilt of his head, the hat he was trying on sliding right off.

Kyun caught it in one hand before it hit the shop floor, ‘Yh bro, it totally looks great on you.’ Wonwoo didn’t believe it for a second.

His friend’s usually low toned voice tended to get higher when he was lying or trying to hold back a laugh. He raised an eyebrow and scoffed at him as he put the ugly moss-green hat back on the shelf.

The shorter snorted, slapping his own hands in mock disappointment. ‘Kyun, you’re a terrible actor.’ Wonwoo stated seriously, keeping the emotion out of his poker face. While his friend dramatically gasped, a hand on his chest, faking a hurt expression at Wonwoo’s comment.

‘What about this one?’ He picked up a red leather Snapback and dropped it on an unsuspecting Wonwoo, ‘Damnnnn Woo, you look like a bad ass rapper.’

He glared at his reflection in the mirror. The hat would’ve probably looked fine if he weren’t dressed so smartly, in a button down and slacks with a classy overcoat. Right now, it just looked silly and he was sure it was breaking some kind of unspoken fashion rule.

‘Yeah, I don’t think so...’ his voice trailed off as he put the hat back in place. Kyun whined and the sound was super childish and loud, startling the female worker at the register. He couldn’t help but laugh at the exaggerated pout.

‘It looks weird. Besides, what kind of “bad ass” rapper reads books and dreams of becoming a world-renowned author?’ He questioned, Kyun must’ve imagined it because he burst out laughing.

‘It could be cool though, you’d be super articulate and get the crowd melting with your deep voice, genius bars and sexy hat.’ The excitable boy explained, putting the hat back on a scowling Wonwoo, who took it off immediately, ruffling his hair in the mirror with a displeased expression.

 

Finding nothing that was worth buying, he began walking out of the hat store and slowly strolled down the busy Hongdae streets. There were more people out and about, now that it was officially lunchtime, queues forming in front of food places as the hungry customers impatiently waited for their turn. 

He was glad they decided to have an early lunch, or they’d be stuck in one of those queues themselves. The cloudless sky was pale blue and bright, deceivingly, so. You’d be fooled into thinking it was a warm sunny day, but his breath was forming visible puffs before him and his fingers were freezing off despite being shoved in his deep pockets. As he was considering buying earmuffs for his numb ears, Kyun fell in step with him. Then he began speaking again, in a reminiscent tone. 

‘Remember that one time in college when you entered that poetry competition?’

He DID remember, they chuckled at the memory. It was their first year at University, and Wonwoo wasn’t too sure which clubs he wanted to join. One of his classmates had praised his poetry skills in assignments and recommended he try it out. He ended up surprising even himself, by winning the whole thing. Despite only learning about the competition a few days prior.

And that’s pretty much the story of how Wonwoo was appointed as the president of the poetry club for the next two years. He smiled slowly, nodding his head in answer.

 

‘Basically, it’d be the same -except there’d be a sick beat and you’d obviously spit harder.’

‘Spit?... gross.’ Wonwoo scrunched up his nose in disgust, he’d rather not do that.

Kyun lightly shoved him with a loud laugh, ‘Not literally. You already have the deep voice and the cold look going on, it’d be great.’ Wonwoo rolled his eyes, he didn’t get why Kyun kept insisting. At some point, it started sounding genuine and less like an elaborate joke, as if he was really considering a rapper Wonwoo. What a joke, he chuckled, shaking his head.

‘No kyun, It’s super weird. I need you to stop.’ He informed in a stern voice, and Kyun fake shivered, pretending to be scared.

They went in a few more shops and in cheesy-Kyun style, bought matching friendship bracelets. They were simple thin silver chains that had unique links and Wonwoo didn’t think much of it since he didn’t even pay for it. After they were done with their random window shopping, the shorter boy hopped in a taxi and went off to a meeting.

 

Wonwoo walked back to the office, feeling giddy and satisfied from the break, it was always nice reconnecting with an old friend. When Kyun had first informed him of his visit to Seoul, Wonwoo assumed he’d be staying for at least a few days. So, you can imagine his shock when he learnt that the other would only be staying for a mere few hours. Apparently, he was only here for quick business reasons, then he’d be boarding the plane back to Hong Kong. It warmed Wonwoo’s heart to know that his sociable friend chose to spend his free time with him, rather than his many other friends.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo leaned back in his chair, ignoring the vibrating phone on his desk as he continued watching his presentation slideshow. He’d made some serious progress on it and had a good feeling about where it was going. The fact that it was due in over two months was irrelevant, because when Wonwoo set his mind to something, it was all he could think about. Therefore, he wanted it finished ASAP, but the fatigue from last night’s Busan to Seoul train journey was getting to him. Should I just go home? He deliberated as he picked up his phone.

His lock screen read **19:55pm** when he unlocked it, to check his new message. Switching off his monitor and organising his desk as he prepared to call it a day, he stared at the capital letters and exclamation marks on his screen.

 

**-HYUNG!**

**-WHEN’RE YOU GOING HOME?**

**19:52pm**

 

Kim Mingyu.

 

A broad smile stretched over his face. He bit his lip as he typed back.

 

**-What’s the significance of the capitalisation?**

**19:55pm**

**-BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT**

**-So when?**

**19:56pm**

 

Wonwoo was sure it wasn’t just him being delusional again, because Mingyu definitely sounded excited. He pouted at the messages. Why?

 

**-Why?**

**19:57pm**

**-Wanna drive you home.**

**19:57pm**

**-That’s it?**

**19:58pm**

**-What?**

**-Was there something specific you wanted to hear…**

**20:00pm**

 

It was that strange feeling again, like he wasn’t being told the whole truth.

 

**-No, it’s just that you seemed so enthusiastic**

**-Using capital letters & replying SUPER fast**

**-I was kinda expecting something more exciting**

**20:03pm**

**-You’re such a diva, honestly**

**-We haven’t seen each other in almost a week**

**-This IS exciting**

**20:04pm**

 

Fair enough, Wonwoo shrugged on his cream-coloured coat over his black buttondown, draping his grey chequered scarf over his broad shoulders. He was excited too, but that’s because he was crushing on the other boy. What was Mingyu’s excuse?

 

**-Hmmm… Sure.**

**-I just finished**

**-Wanna take me home now?**

**20:05pm**

 

He typed his question, switching off the lights and closing his office door on his way out, when he knocked into someone, hard. 

He stumbled back –fortunately not falling over. Unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for his phone or the stack of papers strewn around him. Geez, didn’t people know what a stapler was? or a file for goodness sake, he thought as he knelt on the floor to help the terrified female employee pick them up.

That’s when he realised he’d been glaring, -in his defence, no one would really smile in such a situation. Still, he smoothed his features over and the girl looked a little less terrified as she apologised in a small voice. He handed the papers over and wished her a good night, picking up his phone on his way to the elevator, reading the latest messages. He scowled deeply at the widened crack in the corner, crap – he’d have to be more careful with it.

 

**-HELL YEAH!**

**20:05pm**

**-Why aren’t you down yet? It’s freezing out here.**

**20:13pm**

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo locked the phone and pocketed it as he stepped off the elevator onto the ground floor, he strolled slowly to the exit, his heart beating a little faster with each step. But his brain was overthinking again, why was Mingyu sounding so eager?

The first thing he noticed or rather felt, when he stepped out of the building was the frozen chill in the night air. The second thing he noticed was the distinct lack of a giant named Mingyu, he frowned, confused. The boy wasn’t exactly someone you could easily miss. Slowly turning his head, he lifted a hand to push his glasses back up his nose bridge, but his finger collided with frozen skin, instead of a round metal frame. This happened way too often, he’d forget that he wore contacts and feel the ghost of a weight on his nose bridge, strange. 

Scanning the pavements, his searching eyes collided with a dark figure across the road. He paused, eyes narrowing in confusion as he did a double-take, the figure was bathed in shadows at the corner of the road and his all black outfit made it difficult for Wonwoo to be completely sure of his identity. He was stupidly tall though, at least that matched. But he was also wearing sweats, a hoodie and a black baseball hat -that’s not something a fashion-conscious young man would wear, least of all to a well-off corporate establishment such as Pledis.

He squinted in the darkness, attempting to catch a glimpse of his features, his hand busy retrieving his phone and unlocking it. The guy across the road was unmoving, body positioned to face him, but the hat hindered his ability to identify him, as it obstructed his face.

 

Wonwoo’s gaze shifted to the lit screen in his hand, heart beating fast, not due to excitement this time, but paranoia. It didn’t help that the road was completely desolate, no one was around. A shiver that had nothing to do with the temperature raked through his body, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t a tiny bit terrified. Dialling Mingyu’s number, he waited for the call to go through, what if it was a serial killer? His head whipped up in shock, but it was already too late.

 

The guy was gone.

 

In a split second, strong arms were wrapping around his torso from behind and SNSD’s Gee was suddenly blasting, the shrill sound echoing loudly down the empty dark roads. In his shock, he dropped his phone on the concrete below as his brain went hey-wire. Was he being kidnapped? He didn’t want to die yet.

Just as he made the decision to scream for help, a large hand covered his mouth. He inhaled deeply through his nose, biting down on the hand.

The familiar musky scent registered a second too late and his eyes widened at the husky voice of his dreams.

 

‘Mingyu?!’

 

Turning on his heel, he faced him. From this distance, Wonwoo had no doubts that it was Mingyu.

The taller was pouting down at his hand, his eyes twinkling adorably, ‘it hurts, I can’t believe you bit me.’ He complained, as he extended the hand to Wonwoo. The older couldn’t help but gape, utterly shocked. It was hard to believe that it was Mingyu all along and how could a grown man be this cute?

‘Sorry...’ he mumbled awkwardly taking the hand, he didn’t know what to do with it, though. Upon closer inspection, he felt dumbfounded.

He couldn’t see any bite marks, but he wasn’t the one who got bit, so he wouldn’t belittle the other’s pain. An idea struck his blank brain, as he recalled hurting himself as a child and there was this one thing his mother always did.

Wonwoo gingerly lifted the hand to his mouth, then he gently pressed his soft lips on Mingyu’s slightly rough skin, not once, not even twice but three whole times. His excuse? He didn’t know _exactly_ where he bit, so he had to cover the general area, or it wouldn’t work.

‘Better?...’ he asked, looking up with furrowed eyebrows and a concentrated pout. Mingyu smiled down at him, very cheerily. Then he was being pulled into solid arms, not an inch of wasted space between their bodies, as they stood chest to chest, long limbs in contact even down to their feet.

 

The sudden influx of Mingyu’s heady scent, was sweetly suffocating him. As the warmth of the younger’s embrace engulfed his being, setting the suppressed feelings within his dormant heart aflame.

Wonwoo was dazed, muscles relaxed and face slack, broad shoulders deflated, and smile deranged in the best way. All the built-up adrenaline from earlier seeping away, this was the first time he truly felt unstressed in a long time and it was all down to Mingyu.

The younger’s palm on the small of his back, pulled him out of his trance and he felt his body suddenly stiffen at the next series of disconcerting thoughts.

The way Mingyu held him was beyond caring, he felt safe and loved here -but he also knew that their physical proximity would be misleading to others. He was sure it wouldn’t be good if one of their co-workers saw them like this. The lack of space between their bodies, among other things such as their level of intimacy as well as length of embrace, made them a prime target for gossip. It all sounded exactly like the type of tea that Pledis’s many gossipers thrived off of. Wonwoo didn’t fancy being de-famed like that, especially since Mingyu and him were only bros.

He prayed no one they knew from work would see how much he was enjoying himself, he sighed. Unable to believe he was willingly leaving heaven -AKA Mingyu’s arms. But as he pushed away, he was pulled back in, this time Mingyu’s palm was Caressing the short hair at the back of his head. While his other arm tightly encircled the centre of his back, squeezing him to his hoodie-clad chest. 

The younger hummed contentedly, nuzzling into Wonwoo’s neck and the latter felt his heart expand almost to the point of explosion. This had to stop NOW, he was much too weak for this boy and felt like he’d never have the heart to stop if this went any further.

 

‘Mingyu?...’ He started, his wildly thrashing heart betraying his collected tone, the younger hummed to let him know he was listening, so he continued.

‘I’m freezing, can we get in the car already?’ His voice came out all soft and cringe worthy, he winced in internal pain. Why was he such an embarrassment to himself? He didn’t know why he was being so soft-spoken and just overall soft, all of a sudden. But before he could even consider regretting his words, Mingyu was pulling away from him, smile wide as he gently tugged at Wonwoo’s red cheeks.

‘So cuuute, Wonwoo.’ He cooed, a bit too loud for his liking but Mingyu’s husky voice was his guilty pleasure and hearing his name was the next best thing. So, he couldn’t even complain about being called cute or having his cheeks pulled. Actually, he didn’t even WANT to complain, which was strange -considering he always avoided that one auntie for this precise reason. He shivered as he saw her red lipstick smudged smile in his mind’s eye.

Thankfully, Mingyu had misinterpreted the cause of the shivering, as he attempted to unzip his thin hoodie -to give to Wonwoo. At least, he assumed that was the reason, because he would seriously be forced to re-evaluate his entire crush, if Mingyu was feeling hot in the sub-zero winter weather. His eyes widened, and his pale hands darted to stop Mingyu’s tanned ones, ‘NO!’

Mingyu stopped, looking to him with a questioning pout, as Wonwoo vigorously shook his head. ‘Are you sure?’ The younger’s tone was laced with concern and Wonwoo turned to pick up his cracked phone instead of wasting his breath in replying to the stupid question.

 

Without checking the extent of the damage, he shoved the phone in his coat pocket, he’d save the heart-ache for later. Right now, he needed to get far away from their work place, so he started dragging Mingyu along by the sleeve of his hoodie. Hoping the car was in the same place as usual, or he’d be slightly mortified, to say the least.

Seeing how the younger was following without any complaints, Wonwoo was able to relax a little -assuming he was going the right way. The sleeve in his hand was yanked harshly from his grasp and he turned around, feeling shocked and hurt.

He wondered if he was suffering from severe mood swings, his heart filling with warmth and pink fluffy marshmallows as he witnessed Mingyu gently take his cold hand in his own. The younger then laced their fingers tightly, dropping a feather-light kiss on the back of said hand. Next, he proceeded to put their interlocked hands in his hoodie pocket.

The thing that Wonwoo found most difficult to process, wasn’t the non-platonic nature of the exchange or even how publicly they were doing it. But the pointed way in which those beautiful brown orbs peered into his soul. His body stiffened as he involuntarily gulped, the younger didn’t break the eye-contact once, not even as he went through all those steps. Staring shamelessly, at Wonwoo’s noticeably reddening face.

The latter looked away first- scanning the road for the black land-rover, he tugged at their joined hands when he spotted it nearby. Needing a break from Mingyu’s intense stares and questionable actions, his brain was having a hard time figuring out their meaning and his heart wasn’t taking it too well either.

 

 

As they parted ways to enter the car, he wondered if this was even healthy? Then he remembered how he lived on a diet of instant ramen and kimbap and decided that Mingyu’s adverse effects on him were the least of his concerns, since there were far more unhealthy things in his life. He wisely told his brain to shut the fuck up as he entered the car.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii :))) <3  
> Dunno what to say... what do you guys think?  
> I'm updating on WEDNESday next, then FRIday. But like some people said they check daily for updates and I choked on nothing because that's like the best compliment and I'm NOT even good at writing.
> 
>  
> 
> Follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there but we can chat & stuff :)
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	25. Chapter 25

Once they settled into the warmth of Mingyu’s car, the smooth drive to his apartment began.

Was it weird that he missed this car almost as much as its owner? Okay, he might’ve been a tad over-exaggerating on that one –that was simply impossible. But it was just so cosy and it smelt nice, he wanted to ask what the big cardboard boxes were doing in the back seat, but all thoughts evaded him as the feel of the luxury vanilla-toned leather coaxed him into relaxation. In that moment, he decided that he would gladly fall asleep in it, any day.

He recalled his mother’s knowing smile, as she added Mingyu to the short list of people that made him feel safe, loved and comforted. It was strange how everyone else on that list were either people he’d known his entire life, or most of his life- when Mingyu and him didn’t even know of each other’s existence until a few months ago. Not to mention the pair not having had the best of first impressions, it really made no sense how they got this close, this fast.

 

Staring at the younger’s long fingers as they tapped to a soundless beat on the steering wheel, he suddenly remembered something,

‘Your ringtone’s SNSD?’ He questioned, fighting back a laugh, the younger kept his eyes on the road, nodding slightly. Wonwoo snorted, ‘Wow...’ he’ll admit he sounded slightly judgemental and Mingyu seemed to catch on, ‘Jeon Wonwoo, are you tryna fight me now?’ The younger narrowed his eyes, attempting to sound harsh but Wonwoo saw how the corners of his full, plump lips turned up.

‘I’d totally win if we fought.’ He answered light-heartedly but Mingyu scoffed at his answer, ‘Hyung, if I hit you, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t even be able to hit back.’ Mingyu’s tone was cocky, a barely detectable hint of amusement to his sexy voice, Wonwoo turned to him completely offended.

‘You’d hit me?’ He knew _not_ how he managed to sound so convincingly innocent and disheartened. Shocking both himself and the younger, how was he only discovering his hidden talent for the theatrics now? This would’ve come in handy when he was having a rebellious phase -aged 13, it would’ve gotten him out of so much trouble.

He decided to just roll with it, rearranging his facial expression to suit the tone of his voice. Jutting out his bottom lip and opening his eyes wider, to peer through his lashes at Mingyu’s conflicted side-profile, the older sniffled convincingly.

 

Mingyu looked torn between focusing on the road and turning to him, -Wonwoo thought he’d be able to decide much quicker if their roles were to be reversed. But then again, he wasn’t the one with the driving license so.

‘Nooo, I would never hit you, baby. It was just a joke.’ Mingyu said and Wonwoo blanched, unintentionally flinching away from Mingyu’s touch as the latter reached out for his hand at a red signal.

“Baby”? What the fuck? Mingyu definitely called him “baby”. Colour rushed back into his face in a mixture of frustration and mortification, and he hid his face in his palms. He tried to make sense of the word, but he was older than Mingyu and they were “friends” so really, what the fuck?

‘Hey, are you crying?... Oh my god, I didn’t mean it. Honest.’ Concern and alarm bled into his usually bright tone, he must’ve misinterpreted Wonwoo’s actions as him crying when he was simply attempting to conceal his flaming cheeks. He shut his eyes tightly, biting his lip as he felt Mingyu pull his hand by his skinny wrist to reveal his red face.

He might’ve dramatically turned his head away, opening his window slightly so the cool air could aid in calming down his thriving blush.

 

‘Hyung, please stop breaking my heart. I can’t drive and hug you at the same time.’ Mingyu was still holding onto his wrist, rubbing soothing circles on the pale skin and his dejected tone was truly heart-breaking.

Wonwoo had half-a-mind to demand he stop the car so he could get his hug, but he was quick to reprimand himself for having such thirsty thoughts, he had more self-control than that. Rolling the window back up when his face was significantly frozen, he cleared his throat and Mingyu glanced to him with a troubled expression.

‘Hug me when we get there.’ He stated indignantly, witnessing with barely concealed awe and endearment as a blinding grin blossomed on the younger’s handsome face, he nodded –the older boy bit back a smile of his own, this was more like Mingyu. He watched mortified as he allowed the sneaky flirt to kiss each of his knuckles slowly, too shocked to do anything else. The older boy retrieved his hand even slower, staring at it as if it were some new alien species. He would never be able to look at it the same again or un-feel Mingyu’s luscious lips on his knuckles.

Something shifted slightly in the air around them, Wonwoo felt it but Mingyu was still smiling, his eyes on the road. Maybe, he was the only one feeling the awkwardness but he changed the subject either way, having wanted to address this issue from the moment he got in the car, anyway.

 

‘What’s with all the boxes?... And did you really go to work like this?’ he added as an afterthought. Because he couldn’t think of a single good reason why Mingyu would come to work just to pick him up, but he couldn’t think of any as to why he’d go to work dressed like he was headed to the gym, either.

 

‘Guess.’

 

‘First question or second?’ although, he had no idea, he decided to humour the younger anyway, since he felt bad about upsetting him earlier. Dammit, he was getting soft again.

 

‘Both’

 

‘I don’t think you went to work like this...’

 

‘Why?’

 

‘People always gossip about how “well” you dress... now you just look like a...’ he gestured vaguely to Mingyu’s outfit, ‘ ~~handsome~~ hobo.’ He finished. Truthfully the younger looked amazing -as per usual- the simple tracksuit being upgraded to model standards with his breath-taking visuals. So, the look of distaste on Wonwoo’s face was as fake as his college professor’s wig.

He looked away then, missing the injured expression on the younger’s face, ‘As for the second question, no fucking clue... are you volunteering to transport shit for the company?’

‘Is that seriously your best guess?’ Mingyu sneered as if to say, “that all you got, stupid.” But it wasn’t his fault he was a terrible guesser, Wonwoo didn’t even understand why he was trying.  

‘I’m not bothered. I don’t get why I have to when I have YOU here, you can just tell me.’

 

‘I want YOU to figure it out. You’ve got until we get to your apartment, any longer and I might just have to delete your number, leave the country and never see you again.’

‘You wouldn’t do that...’ He was slightly taken aback by how confidently sure his statement sounded. Leaving no room for arguments, it came out as simple and factual as “2x2=4”. He hadn’t registered the look of blind determination on his face and his balled fists as he pouted.

‘So cute, hyung. How’re you even so sure?’ the taller fussed, but Wonwoo’s heart was panicking at the thought of a Mingyu-less future. That couldn’t happen, he wanted the younger in his life, regardless of their relationship status.

‘Mingyu, you wouldn’t do that. Say you won't...’

 

The younger sobered up at his unwavering tone, ‘I would never. It’s not like I have a choice now, you’re stuck with me forever… BUT if you don’t figure out why I have boxes in the back, then I would be forced to ignore you for a while, cuz it'd be super uncomfortable and embarassing.’

Wonwoo blushed, stopping his brain from dwelling on the “forever” and no “choice” parts, he turned back to the cardboard boxes in the back seat and frowned. It looked slightly messy, a distinct non-professional aura about the way they were taped shut. It reminded him a lot like how the back of Jeonghan’s car was, when Soonyoung and him first moved into ~~their~~ his apartment.

 

He gaped at Mingyu’s angelic side profile, suddenly alarmed, ‘YOU’RE MOVING?’ 

Wonwoo flinched at his own volume and the younger looked scared as he lost control of the car for a short second, the steering accidentally pulling to one side.

The car behind beeped them as it whizzed past.

Mingyu stayed calm, driving ahead silently, until they were just turning onto Wonwoo’s road.

Meanwhile, the older boy had continued to stare wide-eyed at him. Wounded and confused, he felt the former because the younger hadn’t informed him of this big change in his life, until the night of. And the latter, because Why was he here, driving him home, when he should be settling into his new home. There was also a large part of him that was utterly devastated because Mingyu hadn’t taken his (Soonyoung’s) offer and ended up deciding to live elsewhere. But Wonwoo agreed he never wanted to address that part.

 

 

 

 

‘I AM moving... but guess where.’ he sounded sheepish, a hint of a smile on his face as he carefully parked the car in the underground parking of Wonwoo’s building.

The older shook his head lightly, dazed. This was having more of an impact on him than he originally thought.

Mingyu chuckled softly, unbuckling his seatbelt as he started with a grin, ‘does that mean you can’t guess or that you won’t guess? 

The younger’s grin was adorable, his bubbly tone endearing and Wonwoo looked away, his heart screaming but his face sombre.

 

‘You’re upset?’ The younger deduced accurately, despite his unsure tone, ‘Why?’

 

‘Why am I only finding out now? I thought we were closer than that, Gyu’ he kept both his voice and gaze level, unbuckling his seatbelt and reaching for the door when he got no reply.

He was feeling a hurricane of emotions, uncoordinated and wildly chaotic. So much so, that it didn’t even occur to him how over-dramatic he was being.

A click resonated through the car, just before he reached the handle.

That was the lock, Mingyu locked him in.

He turned to the younger with silent rage and a questioning gaze.

 

‘Listen to me first, you can’t just say everything YOU want, then leave like that.’ That’s precisely why he wanted out, he could imagine the younger’s creeped-out tone as he told him he’d overestimated their relationship, and that he didn’t need to report his life to him because he meant nothing significant to him. Hot emotion rose to his throat and his eyes stung, why did it feel like he was being rejected?

‘We’ve barely known each other four months, talking for even less, yet you-’

 

He blinked his eyes furiously, fighting to keep the tears at bay. His wounded brain filling in the gaps, “yet you… think we’re close? think I have to report everything to you? Think we’re more than just friendly co-workers?” little did he realise what Mingyu was about to say next, had nothing to do with thinking. It was more factual than abstract thoughts,

 

‘-you mean so much to me already, hyung. I care about you a lot and although, we might not know everything about each other, I know enough, to trust that I won’t regret wanting to be closer to you.’

The words were said with such passion, that even his own sceptical brain couldn’t refute the sincerity in the younger’s tone. Now, he was fighting back tears for a whole different reason –why was he such a mess?

 

‘Why are you telling me this?’ His voice came out raspier and harsher than intended due to his endeavour in keeping his emotional turmoil in check.

Mingyu sighed, exasperation clear in the way his lanky frame slumped into his seat and the way his pointed look fixed on a reeling Wonwoo,

‘Are you seriously that du- I mean… you know what, I’ll spell it out for you and if you _still_ don’t get, then you’re more than welcome to leave.’

 

Wonwoo didn’t even get the chance to react because Mingyu took a deep breath and resumed talking immediately, ‘I have a million boxes in the backseat and more in the trunk... I picked you up from work even though I didn’t go to work today.... I’m HERE, at YOUR building when I should be moving in to my new place right now.’

Wonwoo nodded after each point, watching with furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips as Mingyu seemed to be getting more and more worked up. After a minute or so of trying to read the situation, he gave up, slowly shaking his head in confusion.

 

‘So?’

 

That one word of pure puzzlement was the trigger, Mingyu sighed, the hat coming off at some point as he aggressively pulled at his own hair –so sexy, his eyes followed the movements, long tanned fingers brushing through dark -almost black- silky hair. He unintentionally licked his lips, biting back a smile at the younger’s adorable pout of frustration -fangirling aside, he was still beyond perplexed. What was Mingyu trying to tell him?

he heard the lock of the car doors opening, watched as the younger’s arms hugged the steering wheel, forehead placed on top of the folded arms, ‘Sorry, for wasting your time, hyung. You can leave now.’ The usual chirpy boy sounded weary, a tinge of regret laced into his words.

Wonwoo’s eyebrows shot up, both in confusion and in a general feeling of stupidity. A large utterly devastated part of him, -that he decided he’d never talk about- kept nagging at him, begging to be addressed. He really didn’t want to, but looking at the clearly upset younger, he decided anything was better than ending their first night after the holidays on such a terrible note.

 

 

He cleared his throat, ‘Hey, Gyu?…’ the younger groaned, a cute whine resonating from his giant body, king of contradiction.

Wonwoo gulped, preparing to finally address that part, ‘Are you moving in with- with me?’ 

He had to take a deep breath, pausing in between his question. The hand furthest away from Mingyu was balled into a fist, so tight that his blunt nails dug painfully into the soft flesh of his palms, he wasn’t prepared for what came next.

 

‘It’s too late for that now, so get out.’

‘WAIT! You were seriously gonna do that?! With me?! Why?...’

‘DIDN’T YOU HEAR ANY OF THE SAPPY CRAP I’VE BEEN SAYING? I. LIKE. YOU. I’ve thought a lot about this and I want to get to know you better… Don’t forget it was you who suggested we move in together in the first place.’ The younger huffed petulantly, an actual toddler and Wonwoo’s heart did three perfect backflips before it dove head first into an ocean of feels.

 

 

 

He’d never reached such a peaceful conclusion on such a critical matter, this fast before. But he already knew what he wanted, his mind being made up for a while now, so the words came out with expected ease,

‘Let’s get your shit upstairs, then. Roommate.’

 

‘Hyung! I- I said I changed my mind.’ He mumbled, but his voice lacked resolve, like the younger was only saying that for the sake of it. Wonwoo bopped him on the head and was already opening the back door to start shifting things, when his world filled with Mingyu.

The boy was all his biased-brain could register, Mingyu’s voice murmuring into his ear as he nuzzled his neck. Invigorating.

 

Mingyu’s arms around his waist as he hugged him to his chest, his sweet manly scent overpowering the smell of cardboard, making him lean back into the taller boy. Insinuating.

 

Mingyu’s fingers lacing with all ten of his, preventing him from grabbing for the boxes. In fact, his brain seemed to have overdosed on the boy, as it chanted the younger’s name on repeat, intoxicated.

 

‘Mingyu…’ his own voice sounded strangely foreign to his hot ears, as the breathiness bordered on a moan, thankfully it was barely a whisper. Unfortunately, the younger’s face was literally not even an inch away so of course, it didn’t go unnoticed.

 

 

 

When Wonwoo turned to face the younger, his knees nearly buckled. A smirking Mingyu from this close proximity was definitely not good for his health, on a frantic whim he broke the contact, stepping away.

Successfully untangling their fingers as he grabbed the closest box to him and stomped off to the elevator, finally calming down as he filled his lungs with much needed Mingyu-less air.

After the second box, he decided he was done. They were heavier than expected and Mingyu seemed fine, anyway. The younger had already moved almost three times as many things next to the elevator than him, despite Wonwoo getting a head start. 

But his arms ached, and his back protested the unfamiliar strain, so instead of carrying more he sat on them. Sighing contentedly at his genius idea. His back leaning against the cream wall next to the elevator as he sat on the first box and stretched his legs out on the second one, he closed his eyes and tried not to think at all.

 

 

His head was a dangerous place right now, full of fluffy thoughts that were so unlike him, yet he found himself biting back cheesy grins. Wonwoo didn’t like grinning much, especially if they were the cheesy kind, but apparently, that’s what thoughts of Mingyu in an apron, cooking him breakfast did to him.

Granted, it wasn’t just his wild imagination since it actually happened before, but now it’d be happening on a daily. The cheesy grin won over and he watched on, helplessly horrified as it stretched his lips, scrunched his nose and exposed his pearly whites.

Wonwoo was quite proud of his straight white set of teeth, most people would need braces and whitening procedures to achieve his natural results -they were precious, part of the reason he didn’t want them exposed like this, he’d rather keep them hidden behind his lips.

 

 

‘Should I be concerned about your mental stability? I don’t wanna be moving in with a psycho.’ It was Mingyu, probably showing off that he can carry more boxes than him, big deal. He forced himself to scowl, fighting to keep his eyes shut.

‘Shut up, bitch.’ Wonwoo replied nonchalantly, because being rude and self-righteous was much easier than explaining his inner thoughts and outwardly crazy actions.

A few minutes later, his eyes were wide open and definitely alert, taking in the younger’s indecent exposure as he demonstrated his superior strength. He couldn’t possibly miss _that_. If it were any other person then he would’ve probably judged the hell out of them, passively showering them with hate for being so douche-y.

But it was Mingyu, so he was instead, very busy almost drooling at the rippling muscles under the form-fitting, thin material of his t-shirt. He wasn’t bulky in the sense that he was some crazy, steroid-taking, body-building hulky maniac, but rather in the sense that it was obvious he worked out regularly. Muscles lean and defined enough, to add to his sexy masculine charm.

He gulped, indulging in the way his biceps strained against the fabric of the shirt as he moved his things into the elevator. His skin had a healthy golden glow to it as if he’d bathed in angel dust, -how was he not sweating yet? Not everyone is an unfit couch potato like you, Wonwoo. He must’ve pulled a strange face as he questioned why the voice in his head sounded like his red-haired friend. The fuck?

 

‘Hyung, are you ok? You’re scaring me.’ The younger seemed to have emptied out the car as he began stacking the boxes in the elevator, he looked concentrated on his task and not scared at all. Wonwoo scoffed,

‘That’s cuz your slow ass is taking forever.’

‘You lost the right to complain when you stopped helping me, so my ass will take as long as it wants.’

‘You’re not supposed to keep using the ass analogy, it sounds disgusting.’ Wonwoo fake-gagged as he lazily kicked and shoved the final box into the elevator, he hoped he wasn’t breaking anything.

‘You started it.’ Mingyu grumbled as he pressed the button for the 17th floor, the doors sliding shut while he crossed his arms and pouted. Wonwoo internally gaped at the paradox that was Kim Mingyu, -surely, he knew how hot he looked with his arms flexed like that, yet he still had the audacity to pout, on top of that. As if being this hot wasn’t already a crime against humanity, he was offended.

 

Wonwoo stood with his foot in between the doors so it wouldn’t close, while Mingyu moved all the boxes and the suitcases to _their_ front door. His foot was getting tired and he realised just how emotionally drained he was, all because of him. First, he gave him a fright, with the whole unintentional serial killer spectacle, then he made him blush till his face blazed, then he got him all emotionally worked-up and irrationally upset, over nothing. Then he proceeded to melt his heart with his sweet words and gave him the best news he’d heard since he learned of his promotion.

Mingyu did all that in the span of 20 or so minutes, eliciting more emotion out of him in that short time, than anyone else could in a lifetime. Watching as the younger wheeled the last suitcase out, he wondered if everything was a dream.

Having an existential crisis as he simply stared at him, his crush was living with him now, this would either be the best thing he’d ever agreed to or the dumbest idea ever. The beeping of his code lock, followed by a click as his front door opened, hauled him into the present. He froze, how did Mingyu know his passcode? He _did_ come over, that _one_ time, but it was _one_ time. Did he really remember that?

 

‘I’m going to bed, make yourself at home.’ Wonwoo was aware that not helping him settle in, might’ve been a little bit harsh but Mingyu was the one that kept it a secret from him. So Wonwoo had to do this, to teach him not to do that again and also, he just really hated lugging heavy things around, so he decided he was okay. 

‘Okay. Good night, hyung.’ The younger mumbled, surprisingly genuine.

‘Night night.’ He could’ve sworn Mingyu snorted a laugh at his reply, but he just let it go.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A muffled thump, followed by a shocked gasp as his phone hit his carpeted bedroom floor. The “crack” from Mingyu’s surprise attack earlier in the night, turned out to be more of a brutal smash. It stretched across the length of it, no longer just a tiny speck in the corner. The device’s screen was now positively shattered, he picked it back up the screen lighting up immediately. 

Wonwoo breathed a sigh of relief, at least it worked –although, he had a feeling that wouldn’t last long. He ignored most of his messages and e-mails, resolving to check through them in the morning, when staring at the battered screen didn’t hurt as much. Next, he checked through his calendar, plugging his phone into the charger. He smiled, making a mental note to give his brother a call.

The younger was turning 22 in a few hours and the brothers always made sure to have a long phone call on the other’s birthday. A long-lasting tradition, ever since they stopped living together, they never skipped out on it. As he changed into his pyjamas, he debated whether to shower now or after their phone call. Laziness won out in the end and he settled for brushing his teeth, he suddenly remembered he’d need to tell him where he hid his birthday gift too.

Was it the abandoned shed in his grandparents’ garden or that conveniently placed crack at the back of their home? Maybe it was in the kitchen cupboard, behind the cleaning supplies.

He didn’t exactly have the best memory and those days were a hectically busy time for him. Therefore, he was -by his own jurisdiction- excused for being so scatter-brained.

 

 

 

‘Happy birthday, Jeon Bohyuk. It’s great watching how much dumber you get as the years go by.’ He spoke lovingly into the tattered device a short while later, smiling as his brother laughed from the other end. And thus, began, the customary “long” phone call. They didn’t have a set number to define what qualified as “long”, but it was safe to say that this exceeded their usual call times.

 

Neither brother realised just how _long,_ it was getting until sleep crept up on Wonwoo, dragging the older sibling into its dark clutches. He had no idea what time it was when he’d finally fallen asleep, did he even hang up?

 

The final conscious thought he’d had before completely blacking out, was the gnawing feeling that he’d forgotten to do something, it seemed important. But it slipped away before he could catch it, so he was none the wiser.

 

Oh, well, he could always deal with it in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ^^ My answer to everything.
> 
> Please don't procrastinate kids, not a good habit. My friend told me that the best way to get over writer's block is to keep writing, so I'm trying. Sorry if the quality is crappy, if you're not clear on anything just drop me a comment. haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah -_-.
> 
> I love meanie, & all of you nice readers <3  
> Follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there but we can chat & stuff :)
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	26. Chapter 26

Ever had those days when you woke up, feeling frazzled and freaked out for no reason. Only to discover that it was for very good reason. Well, that was Wonwoo the next morning, waking up next to an almost dead smashed up phone wasn’t ideal, but discovering that he’d missed his alarm twice was plain disastrous. How did this happen? 

He shot up in bed panicked, grabbing a change of clothes and rushing into the bathroom. He remembered how Bohyuk kept him up on the phone, whining that he needed to wish him a happy birthday past midnight for it to actually count. 

Somehow, they ended up staying up way past that time as they recalled old childhood memories and conversed in hushed tones into the early hours of the morning.

 

Wonwoo scowled at his reflection, he’d already brushed his teeth and washed his face. He even combed his hair, which was very rare for him since he liked the natural waves and only ran his fingers through them on most days. But something was still off, he felt like he was forgetting something very important. 

His eyes widened as he tentatively lowered his head to his armpit and instantly recoiled in disgust. Shower. He’d forgotten to shower last night because his stupid brother kept him up and now he didn’t have time, dang it.

He weighed out his options. All two of them, it was either stink like a wet rat and eat or smell nice and starve. Both were extreme, and he’d rather not have to decide between such vital basic needs.

But he had no time, so he stripped down and began lathering mango-scented soap all over his body, even before the freezing water hit his back.

By the time he finished, he suspected having a mild case of hypothermia as well as a rejuvenated pain, bounding in his skull. But at least he was clean and smelt exotic as opposed to toxic.

 

Physically shivering, he utilised his amazing multitasking skills, pulling on socks, drying his hair and putting things in his bag, simultaneously. His skills turned out to be pretty amateurish as the back of his knees hit the armrest and he fell backwards on the sofa. 

It could’ve been worse, he thought as he finally registered the quiet snickers from directly above him, that’s when he noticed how much firmer and less soft his couch was.

Wonwoo looked up, Mingyu meeting his gaze, the boy’s face was red despite the tan, probably in an effort to control his laughter.

 

‘It’s not funny, Gyu. We’re gonna be late...’ Not making any move to get off, despite his complaint. I mean why would he? Why would anyone? Especially now that he realised he’d landed with his head in the younger’s lap. Nope. He’s staying put, for now.

That explained the firmness below his head, he wondered how much harder his thighs got when he flexed if the relaxed muscle was already this firm. His head was literally laying on his crush’s lap and it felt amazing.

Mingyu kept laughing, presumably at his embarrassing tumble earlier. He was hitting Wonwoo’s shoulder as he cackled. Although, they were gentle hits, so he didn’t feel the need to stop him. Finally, the hysterical laughter seized, calming down to suppressed giggles. His hand found its way to Wonwoo’s slightly damp hair and the younger’s husky voice sounded shaky after his outburst,

‘S-sorry hyung, I should’ve told you sooner... We’re not leaving for at least another 20 minutes.’

 

Wonwoo’s eyebrows furrowed, tone perplexed, ‘but by then it’ll be 7:50am, the bus takes at least 25 minutes so by the time we get there, we’ll be like half an hour late.’

‘Hmmm... that’s IF we take the bus, but how long does a car take?’ Mingyu sounded like he was wiggling his eyebrows but Wonwoo’s eyes had long been shut to enjoy the pleasant pressure on his scalp, so he didn’t see him.

‘Oh.’ His eyes shot open instantly, realisation bestowed upon him, about time. Mingyu lived with him now, he didn’t need to take the bus anymore. He allowed himself a relieved sigh, not so gently slapping the younger’s chest. It probably did more harm to his own hand than Mingyu’s hard chest anyway.

‘... You bitch, why didn’t you tell me?’

‘It was so funny watching you run around like a headless chicken, thinking you’re late.’ Mingyu laughed, and Wonwoo frowned, crossing his arms and pouting up at his roommate.

‘Glad you find amusement in my demise.’

‘You’re super cute.’ The younger cooed, poking his pouted lips and Wonwoo blushed, slapping the hand away and hauling his body up on the armrest so that his back was facing Mingyu’s front.

‘Stop insulting me.’ He huffed, not really offended at all, just embarrassed.

 

Mingyu didn’t get the hint, or he did but didn’t give a hoot. He shuffled closer, his long arms encircling him from the back, tanned cheek to Wonwoo’s reddened one, while the younger squished their bodies together. ‘My little adorable squishy.’

‘I’m older than you.’ Wonwoo deadpanned, was he sweating? Crap.

Mingyu chuckled, ‘Go have breakfast, we’ll leave after that.’

 

He hummed in reply on his way to the kitchen, grateful for the break but also weirdly upset that Mingyu wasn’t clinging onto him anymore.

 

 

 

Wonwoo ate his breakfast at a record-breaking pace, which may or may not have had something to do with him wanting to be next to a certain Kim Mingyu, ASAP.

It wasn’t very hard to guess the reason, because he joined the younger on the sofa less than 10 minutes later. 

Whipped, his brain quipped, “yup.” Wonwoo replied. Then stopped.

Because was he really having a whole conversation with _himself_ , in his _own_ head?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The TV was on the news channel and the time on the screen read 7:43am, the reporter’s lips were moving but all he could hear was the sound of blood rushing in his ears with every loud heartbeat. Mingyu put his arm around him, cuddling him to his body and Wonwoo just melted into the touch. Suddenly, remembering something as he noticed the lack of cardboard boxes in his living room.

‘Did you unpack everything already?!’ His tone was hesitant, disbelieving. 

‘No. I’d say I got like 30% of it done... The boxes are in my room if that’s what you’re asking.’ Mingyu’s hand snuck into his hair again, and he felt the now mostly dry strands at the back of his head, being ruffled by the long fingers.

‘Do you need help with it after work.’ He asked, eyes almost drooping shut, it wasn’t his fault he liked getting his hair felt up, it also wasn’t his fault that Mingyu was so good at doing _precisely_ that. But his eyes decided to fly open in disappointment when Mingyu spoke next.

‘About that... I have a seminar.’ The younger’s tone sounded regretful, like he wasn’t too happy about it either. But the hand still in his hair did a great job in pacifying him. Was he doing it on purpose? Did he know how much Wonwoo liked it?

 

Pledis organised the so-called seminars regularly, either for training or business purposes. Wonwoo remembered having to go on a few in his first year of employment, always finding a way to avoid going after that. It was either a rural location, somewhere in the mountains surrounded by nature for training and discussions. Or a hotel room in a different city, where they had to attend back-to-back meetings and a conference or two.

Apparently, they had a purpose too, a crucial one as they were told.

Usually higher-ups would select a few people from different departments and send them to attend seminars, in order to strengthen teamwork or build trust or some crap like that.

Naturally, he hated it, but he was Wonwoo and he hated a lot of things. In his defence, he had every reason to hate seminars, though. He remembered how those seminars usually lasted for at least two nights and a day, he didn’t fancy being in the middle of nowhere with people he didn’t know. Nor did he appreciate the experience of sleeping on a strange bed and being expected to socialise.

It was hell, and now the damned seminars would be taking Mingyu away from him as well. It was safe to say that if a “seminar” were a tangible being and he had a loaded gun, he wouldn’t hesitate to put a few fatal holes in its body. He kept the dread and murderous thoughts to a minimum, as he sighed.

‘Where is it? And do you know what you’ll be doing?’

 

‘Yup. it’s a 3-day, 3-night seminar in Incheon. First, we’re attending a couple meetings in the morning. Then we have a few team building and training exercises on Friday afternoon and on Saturday there’s an all-day conference… not too sure about Sunday morning, though.’ Contrary to his earlier regretful tone, he sounded much better now, excited even. Wonwoo would never know what that felt like, he grimaced, asking a different question,

‘So you’re leaving when?’

 

‘Today, probably before lunch.’

Wonwoo nodded, although it felt more like he was snuggling closer to the younger since his head was on the other’s chest. He stopped, voice trailing off as he prompted, ‘Coming back on...’

‘Sunday around 5 or 6pm, but that could change.’ Mingyu was definitely excited about this, perhaps it was his first time and he didn’t know what he was walking into. But he was generally friendly and outgoing so maybe he’d actually enjoy himself there.

Hopefully, Wonwoo would be able to enjoy himself as well during that time. Maybe, meet his friends after a while or read a new book at the library or try to get some work done. He was beyond disappointed though, he’d hoped to spend the first weekend of them being roommates, together.

‘Okay.’ He sighed, mumbling.

 

‘That all you have to say?’ Mingyu’s tone was teasing, gently tugging at the strands between his fingers.

‘Ummm, good luck?’ He didn’t know why it came out sounding like a question, but it was too late to change that now.

‘Thanks, baby.’

 

Was that a joke? Did he hear that right? He sounded serious, but he was probably just messing around. Wonwoo’s brain turned mushy and he lost himself in the feeling of utter bliss as heat flooded his being. Then his brain-matter regrouped and snapped him out of his trance. 

‘I’m not a baby.’ He pushed the younger away, cheeks burning as he spat his sentence, irritated. 

‘You’re so cute.’ He was ignored as per usual, the younger cooing as he pulled at a red cheek instead.

‘I’m not that either.’ His sentence came out muffled and barely intelligible, since his cheek was still being tugged around by an amused Mingyu.

‘Adorable squishy.’ Both Of his cheeks were getting squished around simultaneously now, and he was beyond mortified. That’s it, he thought. In a swift movement Wonwoo grabbed both of the younger’s wrists and removed them from his face. Then he painted on a deep scowl, that was entirely not based on his true feelings. He glared and Mingyu giggled, hugging him tightly.

Wonwoo didn’t want to hug back, but he ended up doing it anyway. Completely out of instinct, unaware of his own treacherous actions. 

‘Don’t miss me too much.’ The words were mumbled into his ear and it took a great deal of self-control not to shiver at the sweet tingling sensation that engulfed him.

‘Is this a goodbye hug?’ He hadn’t realised he’d let his thoughts slip out, until Mingyu replied.

‘No, it’s a “see you soon” hug and also an “I promised to hug you last night” hug, remember?... don’t replace me while I’m gone, baby.’

 

‘Whatever. Let’s leave now.’ He sighed, eager to get the taller boy away from him and his red cheeks, due to a mixture of embarrassment and abuse. Also, the sweet-smiled, puppy-like boy, was still calling him the “b” word and it was really not okay. He _did_ remember how he made Mingyu promise to hug him as an apology, while the younger naively fell for Wonwoo’s cunning acting, the previous night, he was surprised the younger remembered that, he wasn’t even really serious about that. He hoped that today’s overdose on Mingyu would keep him satiated until he came back home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A firm knock sounded at his office door, it was almost four hours past midday, the sun’s brilliance dimming as it prepared to retire for the day. He yawned, tired as always.

‘Come in’ he voiced robotically, not looking up from the monitor, until he heard the visitor speak.

 

‘So you and Mingyu, huh?’

He looked up faster than ever, startled, as anxiety racking through his veins,

‘W-what do you mean, Vernon?’

 

The blonde smirked, ‘I saw you “hugging”, you two seemed… _very_ close.’ He invited himself to sit down opposite Wonwoo, folding his arms on the desk that was separating them.

 

He glared at the younger boy, ‘Stop wasting my time. Mingyu and I are JUST friends.’

Vernon nodded, his expression told Wonwoo that the younger didn’t believe him at all, like he was already convinced of their relationship even before he came to ask.

‘Hyung, I could understand him driving you home, but now he even drives you to work… You nearly hit him the first time you met, so why the sudden change?’

 

Wonwoo coughed, flustered, as his face began to heat up. ‘Since when were you so into gossiping?’ His mind was frantic, tone barely even. How many people saw that? What if they started a rumour? Oh god. 

‘I wasn’t really interested at first, but seeing your reaction, I’ve changed my mind... Are you and Mingyu together?’ He asked seriously, charismatic gaze searching his face for any signs of lying.

‘NO.’ Internally, Wonwoo praised himself for keeping his face expressionless, he couldn’t expose his feelings. Then he nearly lost it as Vernon spoke next,

‘Seungkwan has pictures from Wednesday night, he’s convinced you’re dating.’

 

Why did it feel like he was being drilled for a confession, to a crime he didn’t even commit? It felt like a police interrogation and the worst part was that Vernon wasn’t even lying, his receipts were accurate. They had every right to suspect him and Mingyu, but it was pointless, since they _really_ were just friends.

‘Seungkwan? the loud one? From Junhui’s department?’ Vernon nodded, his hair bouncing with the head movement.

‘Oh my god, whyyy?!’ He ran a hand down his face, frustrated. He knew since that day in the elevator that the loud kid, couldn’t be trusted.

 

‘Chillax hyung. It’s just for a bet, are you sure you’re not dating?’

 

People were betting on him, he was furious. Did he even want to know what they were saying?

‘I think I’d know if I was in a relationship with my roommate. We’re _just_. friends.’

 

‘And Kidney function is not a right it’s a privilege.’

It was about time the younger said something strange and entirely irrelevant to the conversation. He _was_ expecting it, but that didn’t mean Wonwoo wasn’t momentarily taken aback, though.

‘What?’

 

Vernon went back to his interrogating after the strange statement,

‘So you LIVE with him. You “hug” so... sensually in public for 6 whole minutes-’

‘Wait, how do you know it was 6 minutes? 

‘5 minutes 57 seconds, Soekmin was timing it... BUT, if you’re _not_ dating? Then, you _must_ be doing things together.’ Vernon smirked, looking quite proud of himself.

‘Things?!’ he asked tentatively, dreading the answer.

 

‘Yeah, you know friendly blowjobs and platonic sex, that kinda thing.’

 Wonwoo blanched, ‘WHAT THE FUCK?!’

 

‘I really didn’t take you for the fuckboy type, but damn hyung. You literally snatched up the hottest guy in Pledis so easily, do you know how many people hate you for that.’

 

He took a deep breath, he never asked for this. Why can’t people just mind their own business. He needed to end this, assertively.

‘Firstly, I’m NOT a fuckboy. Secondly, I snatched no one, he chose to live with me and thirdly, I don’t give a fuck what they think. Mingyu is my friend. Full. Stop.’ His balled fist hit the table with his final point and Vernon flinched back, probably not having expected that.

Slowly the blonde boy began smiling and nodding his head. ‘Okay.’ He sing-songed, hopping out of his chair and already by the door,

‘That’s it? You’re leaving?’ The ill-concealed shock in his voice was quite audible. Was Vernon really done? Does he believe him now? Will Seungkwan start a rumour? Why was his life so hard?

‘Ummm Yes, have a nice day, Wonwoo hyung.’ And with a small wave he was gone. His office was now shrouded by a dark cloak of silence, crap. What would Mingyu think when he got back?

 

Wonwoo shook his head, refocusing on his monitor where he was proofreading a fantasy novella by a first-time author. It had its fair share of errors and the plot needed polishing, but he saw potential in it. Which is why he chose to go through it. Losing himself in the fiction, he lost touch with reality, allowing his brain a much-needed break from his anxiety-ridden thoughts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Later that night, he took the bus home for the first time in a long while. He frowned, already missing the younger’s car. The next morning, he woke up late again, he was convinced his phone was bugging out at this point, because he normally heard the alarm, but he swore it didn’t even ring this morning.

He rushed to get ready, but sadly there was no Mingyu to drive him, so he was late.

 

Joshua called for a last-minute meeting in the auditorium, which most of the staff attended. Once they settled down, he announced the award ceremony would be moved from the end of January to the 12th of that same month, citing that the venue had an overlap with another event. Wonwoo didn’t care much, he wouldn’t be attending anyway, just like he hadn’t attended for the previous two years.

 

Wonwoo swallowed down his lunch, convinced that it was the worst thing he’d eaten in a long while. The bread was most likely stale, and the lettuce was browning and slimy instead of fresh and crispy. But it was the most edible looking thing in the cafeteria and he couldn’t starve. He realised how he’d been taking Mingyu’s incredible cooking for granted, he’d have to remind him how amazing he was.

 

On Saturday, his mood was a bit brighter as Soonyoung came over and they spent the day lazing around, playing video games and re-watching old movies. Wonwoo told him about the situation with Mingyu, not forgetting to include his weird talk with Vernon. His best friend laughed at him and told him to just confess.

But Wonwoo knew life wasn’t that simple, he was _smart_ , Soonyoung was _not_.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday morning came around and he was yet to receive any form of communication from Mingyu. At this point he knew it wasn’t the younger to blame, either he was somewhere with no signal or Wonwoo’s phone was royally fucked internally, as it was on the exterior.

He pushed Soonyoung’s big head off his dead arm and grabbed the redhead’s phone as well as his own, before padding to the living room quietly. His best friend had decided to stay over for the night to keep Wonwoo company, since he’d been feeling a little confused and annoyed at everything ever since Thursday. The reason being way too obvious. 

Sitting down on the plush cushions, he pulled up Mingyu’s number, copying the digits into Soonyoung’s pink iPhone and dialling. Wonwoo shook his head with a tiny smile, the redhead hadn’t changed his password since high school and he wished he could fuck up one of his relationships, like he did to him. But A: Wonwoo was too nice, and B: Soonyoung was an idiot so he really needed _no_ help in eff-ing things up.

 

The call dialled and dialled and dialled but it didn’t seem like anyone was picking up, he frowned lowering the phone to cancel the call and try again, when he heard a distant muffled voice.

‘Hello? Mingyu?!’ He’d put the phone back on his ear so quickly that it hurt. But the pain was secondary to the pure feeling of elation when Mingyu’s groggy morning voice filled his ears.

 

‘Wonwoo? Baby, is that you?’

 

He rolled his eyes, wanting to berate the younger for even questioning it, of course it was Wonwoo. He was offended that Mingyu was asking when he should know already. He decided to drag out some sarcasm,

‘No. It’s Patricia from the psychiatric ward, they want you back.’ 

Mingyu’s chuckles healed his weary heart and he smiled along with the angelic sounds, ‘who’s number is this?’ 

‘Soonyoung’s.’

‘Oh, did your phone break?’

Instead of replying, he countered with a question of his own, ‘Did you call me, since you left?’

 

‘At least 13 times, they didn’t go through, though.’

Of course, Mingyu called and he didn’t get it. His phone must’ve really hit the grave early, he felt betrayed. The thing cost a fortune and he barely had it for 6 months, life was annoying.

 

 

‘I wasn’t ignoring you.’ They said simultaneously, after a short pause. Then they were laughing together for a while after that, probably recalling how they’d had many similar situations before.

Wonwoo was the first to calm down, ‘I think it’s broken, buy me a new one.’ He whined, it was honestly a joke and Mingyu laughed not taking it seriously, just as he expected. Good.

 

They talked for a good hour or so, about the seminar, about the last-minute meeting for the award ceremony and about buying new blinds and curtains since Wonwoo never changed them before. Later, they hung up after Mingyu wished him a happy new year and said he had to get back to work.

He couldn’t believe it was already 2018, at least in a mere few hours, it _would_ be. why was time so fast? also why did Pledis employees not get Monday off. Surely, New Year’s Day counted as a national holiday, that was annoying.

 

After breakfast, Soonyoung rushed out of his apartment, almost forgetting his phone after a one-sided, three second hug. Citing how he had a lunch date planned and completely forgot about it till now.

He was happy for his friend’s blooming romance, but he wouldn’t sit here and act like he didn’t envy them. Because he did.

He wanted to have _that_ with Mingyu, he wasn’t even sure if it was possible, though. Sometimes the way the younger acted towards him was quite gay, giving him the impression that he saw him as a potential love interest. But he hadn’t known Mingyu that long and he had a feeling the younger was naturally flirty and had that kind of loving, affectionate personality.

Though, at some points Mingyu’s actions, were a bit too excessive and seemed too intentional for it to be put down to his “affectionate” personality. Now, a mild ache was beginning to blossom at the back of his head, his mood was sour, and he still had no clue what to do about his crush.

He ignored the loud thoughts in his head and tried to watch TV, but the dry channels quickly bored him. So, he tried to play video games instead, but it stopped being fun when he remembered how much better playing with Soonyoung was. Next, he tried to write a new short story, but inspiration must’ve skipped his dull brain because it never came.

After hours of aimlessly lounging around, he decided to just go to bed, sleep was always good. He would do that for a few hours, then wake up just in time for Mingyu to come back and then he’d be happy. He didn’t even doubt that last point, it was a fact he could always count on.

 

 

 

 

 

He fell asleep feeling content and confident about his plan, but sometimes, things just didn’t go according to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder when this'll end. I have a feeling it'll hit 100k words & that's a terrifying thought. Can ya'll believe I initially planned for it not to exceed 10k? Not long left to go though... I hope.
> 
> MEANIE, MEANIE, MEANIE <3 Did I mention I love them?
> 
>  
> 
> Follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there, but we can chat & stuff :) Don't be afraid to hit me up (do people even say that anymore?), one of you already has & she's lovely ;D
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	27. Chapter 27

His body was vibrating pleasantly, a blazing trail of finger and palm prints, sweetly burning him, wherever they connected with his sensitive, pale skin. He was floating on a bed of clouds, everything was blindingly white, rays of light surrounding his body.

Then the vibrating intensified, and his eyes slowly peeled open, feeling puffy and well rested.

He blinked once. Twice, then his eyes widened, body stiffening up instantly as if he’d been electrocuted.  

 

‘Morning hyung, it’s 7:20, you should get up.’

 

Mingyu was sitting cross-legged on the floor by the side of his bed, their heads almost level.

Wonwoo was speechless, not due to shock or nerves but mild surprise. How long had he been asleep? His barely awake state rejected the math, but it must’ve been at least 15 or 16 hours, damn.

Another reason for his lack of words was his own toxic breath, he’d forgotten to brush his teeth before bed, thinking it’d be a short nap, and Mingyu was too close. So, he nodded instead, resolving to keep his mouth clasped shut.

 

‘I made breakfast, eat after you freshen up...’ the younger’s husky whispers made him feel some type of way and he ignored the rising temperatures as he nodded again.

He thought that was it. the end of their awkward exchange, that the younger would leave him to it and go about his own business, but he couldn’t have been more wrong.

 

Mingyu’s face was getting closer, alarmingly fast.

But everything in Wonwoo’s world was trailing behind in slow motion.

His eyes widened, and his jaw almost fell slack, a small gasp almost falling out, as he felt the firm pressure of soft lips on his warming cheek, the heat upgrading to scalding levels right after.

Then the younger pulled back, a self-satisfied grin overtaking his handsome face as he tugged at the abused cheek, murmuring ‘cute.’

 

Wonwoo gulped, utterly shocked and Mingyu was already closing his bedroom door with a soft click.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dazed. That was probably the most accurate word to describe his current state of mind. Due to that, he’d nearly slipped in the shower twice, dropped the toothpaste in the sink, instead of on the toothbrush, then nearly poked his eyeball out as he tried to wear his contacts.

That near-death experience was quite sobering, so he put the contacts back in the container. Finished getting dressed and wore his round glasses instead. Fuck contacts, it was a new year and Wonwoo would stop poking his eyes every morning, it wasn’t fun.

Then, his nose led him into the kitchen where a colourful plate of mouth-watering cuisine awaited him. He wasted no time in grabbing his fork and taking a syrup drenched bite of incredibly fluffy pancakes. Then, popping in a forkful of an assortment of sweet fresh berries. His eyes rolled into the back of his head at the heavenly combination of flavours, he might’ve also moaned in bliss -but that wasn’t important. The firm arms that snaked around his middle as he ate however, were _very_ important. So important, in fact, that he didn’t even mind how it interrupted his delicious meal. 

‘You like it?’ Mingyu’s chin rested on his right shoulder as he deliberately snuggled closer to his face and neck.

 

He hummed in affirmation, ‘It’s sooo good.’ He swallowed the food, ‘I missed your cooking, you’re seriously one of the best cooks I know. Second, only to my mum.’

‘Aww baby... that’s so sweet. I’ll make it for you more often, then’

 

‘Would you really? Just for me?’ He narrowed his eyes, for two reasons.

One, to convey the sceptical tone in his voice better, why would Mingyu do that JUST for him?

And two, he’d taken off the glasses to eat, so he needed to squint in order to see.

 

Mingyu nodded enthusiastically, head bopping on his shoulder, their cheeks sliding against each other at the movement. His skin was so soft and warm, Wonwoo wanted to put his lips on it. Then Mingyu spoke up, ending his internal stream of thirsty thoughts,

‘Of course, hyung. For you, I’d gladly do so much more… Pancakes aren’t even hard.’ Mingyu cuddled closer to his back, nuzzling the side of his face. He sounded like he was pouting, a glance out of the corner of his eye confirmed it

 

‘You tell other people the same thing too?’

 

‘Just the special ones’ His heart stopped.

Then started again, skipping beats and going much faster than before.

 

Wonwoo smiled, ‘Who’s that?’

 

‘Hmmm let’s see, Jeon Wonwoo, Squishy, baby and that good-looking rude guy from the editorial team.’ The smile widened into a grin, nose scrunching up and he craned his head backwards to look at the younger’s face. His healthy tan and radiant smile were making him glow. He looked beautiful, effortlessly so, in a way that was almost too ethereal for this world. Could someone like that possibly find him attractive?

Not that he felt ugly, Wonwoo knew he wasn’t bad looking, but when it came down to it he recognised that he wasn’t anything special either. Sure, he was quite tall, well proportioned, had a symmetrical face and nice teeth. But he felt that he was too skinny, not enough meat on his bones and that he was too pale. Which coupled with his fatigue, made him look like the walking dead sometimes. Wonwoo knew he was plain, especially compared to someone like Mingyu, hence why he found the compliment hard to believe. 

So was the younger sweet talking him for fun again, or did he actually mean it? only one way to find out.

‘You think I’m good looking?’

‘I’ve got eyes, hyung. Don’t act like you don’t know you’re handsome.’ Wonwoo blanked for a second, answer unexpected, the younger’s certain tone more so. He knew him well enough to know that on this occasion Mingyu was simply being honest. His entire being leapt with ill-concealed joy, the elated tone seeping into his voice,

‘Wow, I’m handsome as well now?’ Wonwoo was only joking around at this point, so technically he deserved what happened next.

A big red strawberry was forced in his mouth as he laughed, nearly choking on the sweet fruity juices,

 

‘Yes, now stop being cute and finish your food.’

‘You’re always calling me that...’ Misplaced, mild frustration leaked into his tone. He loved that Mingyu was blatantly saying all these sweet things to him, though at the same time, he was beyond frustrated that it was happening this way. If Mingyu really liked him like that then why was he holding back? Why was he hiding behind the mask of friendship, surely the confident boy would’ve swooped him off his feet by now, if he was into him like that. Right?

But as he turned to look at the tall boy by his side, smile blindingly bright. His eyes stung, he hoped he wasn’t right. 

 

‘Calling you what? Cute?’

Wonwoo nodded, chewing on his mouthful of fluffy pancake, he’d literally bitten off more than he could chew, while he was lost in thought. It made him resemble a chipmunk with his stuffed cheeks.

‘Because you’re adorable, look at your cheeks.’ He extended a hand to pull at Wonwoo’s cheek but the older managed to grab it by the wrist before it did. Then he just held on to it as he swallowed the last of his breakfast.

 

‘Finished.’ He proclaimed, even though Mingyu could clearly see it for himself.

It was just an old habit from his younger days, one of those things that he never grew out of. He remembered how his mother used to watch him closely during meals making sure he ate everything, since he was a super picky eater growing up. The habit resurfaced occasionally whenever he was in similar situations.

He blushed at the childish slip-up and Mingyu squeezed their laced fingers with a soft chuckle. He glanced at their joined hands, a ghost of a smile on his lips, he’d forgotten to let go of that. But he didn’t regret it at all.

‘That’s good, baby. Let’s go now.’ Mingyu gently ruffled his dark hair, kissing his cheek and Wonwoo fought back the heat that was threatening to spread.

 

Twice. Mingyu had kissed him _twice_ now, in less than an hour. What in the world was happening?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apparently, a lot was happening in the world. There had been a serious, multiple-car collision earlier, forcing them to take a longer route to work since their usual route was partly blocked and suffering severe delays. Thus, they arrived to work quite late, as did a noticeable number of other employees for the same reason.

A _lot_ , seemed to be happening at work as well. It promised to be one of the busiest days of the year, understandably, since it _was_ a new year. Many old projects required urgent conclusion and dozens of new ones were due to begin, the editorial staff were all frenzied, _actually_ working on their own accord. _That_ was a first.

Wonwoo allowed himself a full second of shock before he shook his head and got to work on his own tasks.

 

Just as he’d predicted, there was way too much that needed doing. Including an ill-timed conference call, which wasn’t even meant for him, initially, it took up almost an hour of his time. The employee in charge of that project had been off sick, forgetting to reschedule or inform him in the least, resulting in the daunting predicament. He made a mental note, to rant professionally and reprimand him smoothly for his incompetent error.

However, the call had ended on a good note and Wonwoo managed to skirt around the details and pretend he understood the topic inside-out when in fact, he was hearing it all for the very first time. He prided himself in remaining professional and effectively saving the project from going up in flames, nevertheless, there was no time for celebration or anything of that sort. Wonwoo had a whole mountain of work that he needed to conquer, and the call didn’t even amount to a few pebbles at the very bottom.

 

 

 

Hours of diligent work and a missed lunch later, he was only starting to feel like he’d scratched the surface. He would’ve honestly appreciated if it wasn’t dumped on him all at once, but complaining was pointless now, since it’s already been done. He’d have to do his best, and endeavour not to compromise on the quality and standard of finish, in his rush to get it done.

In order to do that, however, Wonwoo needed to manage his time, effectively, he needed to pace himself, accordingly. Basically, he needed to eat, rest his eyes by looking at something less blindingly bright than his monitor and he also needed to buy a new phone.

The fact that he’d been carrying -what was now rendered- a piece of ugly decoration, only just dawning on him. Apparently, the “incompetent” employee _had_ informed him of the conference call via text, three hours prior to the actual terrifying event. Which was a far cry from professional, but it would’ve given him more time to read up on the topic and hold a better conversation, he would’ve been slightly better prepared, having expected it beforehand.

But Alas, the rage-inducing piece of useless technology hadn’t alerted him to that fact, therefore it needed to go, ASAP. 

 

 

 

 

It was just past 3pm when he’d shrugged his cream coat over his royal blue turtle neck, fixing the lapels and the tiny pieces of stray hairs around his forehead. He wasn’t exactly obliged to check up on Mingyu, but the younger always took such good care of him. He convinced himself that it was strictly friendly concern, a quick stop by his office shouldn’t hurt, the younger must’ve been similarly swamped with work if he hadn’t come down to him yet.

He swung by the toilet before heading upstairs, and after a final check in the mirror of the public restroom, he nodded his head in approval and made his way to Mingyu. He only realised the reason for his unusual behaviour the moment he walked into the younger’s office, he couldn’t believe that he was subconsciously trying to please and impress him.

In hindsight, it made perfect sense and the principle was sound, Mingyu _was_ his crush after all. But this was Wonwoo, he’d never done that for anyone before, not even when he was genuinely dating.

 

‘HYUNG?!’

Wonwoo jumped out of his thoughts, flinching at the volume, he fixed his gaze on the owner of the alarming tone. His eyes connected with Mingyu’s and they both smiled, despite everything, then Mingyu asked,

‘Did you eat yet?’

 

‘It’s half past three, why’re you only asking me now?’ the words might have been harsh, but his light tone made up for it, he knew Mingyu wouldn’t take offence to that.

‘Oh shit, really?... that was a five-hour meeting then…’,

‘Fuck.’ The younger slumped back into his office chair and groaned.

 

Wonwoo invited himself in, shutting the door behind him as he moved a small chair from the corner and placed it adjacent to Mingyu’s. Then, he propped an elbow on the messy, paper-work ridden desk, staring at the younger’s face, almost regarding him in a new light, since he was sure he hadn’t heard the younger swear before.

It was strange, Mingyu was always so well-spoken, smart and respecting in his speech, like the kind-hearted angel he was. This was, _interesting,_ to say the least. But he liked the old Mingyu better, the kind sweetheart who always spoke cleanly.

‘Mingyu, please stop, that really doesn’t suit you.’ A tremor to his deep voice, because sometimes change was uncertain and sort of creepy.

The younger glanced around, a genuine look of bewilderment staining his handsome face, ‘what?’

 

Wonwoo deadpanned, did he really not realise?

‘The swearing?...’

‘Oh... Yeah, that happens sometimes…’ he ruffled his own hair, sweeping the silky strands back and away from his face as he sighed heavily. Rarely, did the younger ever look like this, stressed and tired, he wanted to see him smile.

‘When you’re stressed?’ he asked in a small voice.

‘And tired. But yeah… do you know what time I got home last night?’

 

He blushed, remembering how he’d completely slept through the entire evening and all the way to this morning. He had no clue, ‘You said you’d be back around 5 or 6pm, was it later?’

Mingyu nodded, chuckling -albeit dryly- in disbelief, rather than actual humour, ‘Almost 3am, babe. Can you believe it?’

A harmless snort escaped Wonwoo’s mouth, he didn’t mean to be unsympathetic, but he tended to laugh at tragedies, some called it rude an insensitive. He simply liked to think that he was making the best out of a bad situation. And because of that, he could no longer hold back his laughter, he placed his forehead on the cool surface of the glass desk and let it rake through his body, shaking his shoulders and adding unwanted colour to his previously blushing cheeks. As if he needed more on there, ‘Oh MY fucking days… did your car break down or something?’ he managed to say between giggles.

Mingyu was just watching him calmly, brown orbs following his every movement, a small smile etched on his rosy lips, ‘Not mine.’

 

‘Tell me.’ Wonwoo folded his arms flat on the desk, cushioning his head on top as he faced the younger.

‘Okay so, there was eight of us in total, driving in two cars. Mine and Chanyeol’s- do you know Chanyeol?’ Wonwoo shook his head, ‘Really loud, friendly, good-looking guy? Nice smile, freakishly tall, toned body… No?’ Wonwoo tilted his head, why was Mingyu describing himself so seriously, as if he wasn’t describing _himself_? He was genuinely confused as he asked.

‘Since when did you change your name to Chanyeol and clone yourself?’

 

Mingyu blinked, then a slow smirk graced his tired features, he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, ‘glad to know you hold me in such positive regard, hyung.’

‘You can’t deny that it sounds _just_ like you... So, he’s real?’ he mumbled, his face wanted to blush harder, but there was no more skin to pigment, since his face was as red as the blood beneath it.

‘I’m surprised you _don’t_ know him, _every_ one does.’

 

‘I bet he’s cooler than you.’ Wonwoo clearly meant that as a joke, the kind that people ignored and swept under the carpet. But it seems, Mingyu was intent on dissecting it in broad daylight. 

‘He’s cool. But _I_ know _you_ know that _I’m_ waaay cooler. Besides, he’s got a boyfriend.’

Wonwoo pouted, eyebrows furrowing in confusion, ‘I said he was cool, not express a desire to date him.’

‘I’m just letting you know, in case you were interested.’

Okay, but Wonwoo didn't even know this Chanyeol guy, why was the younger shutting him down? He decided to poke at the subject, experimentally,  ‘I can be a home-wrecker, if I wanna be.’

 

He had the audacity to chuckle, Wonwoo was offended, ‘It wouldn’t work.’ Mingyu easily shut him down, with a breeze. Was he that easy to reject, so undesirable to the extent that he couldn’t seduce someone if he wanted? He frowned, sitting up from his comfortable position to fight him. He glared at the younger, making his tone sound as menacing as possible. Which was _pretty_ menacing in his opinion,

‘Why? Am I lacking in some way? Not “hot” enough for him, or something?’

Mingyu didn’t look like he was being “menaced”, his face remained clam, and his eyes never lost their gentle nature as he bored into his own, ‘No. you’re more than “hot”. It’s just that they’ve been dating for over 8 years now, soulmates, they call them. Nothing can break them apart.’ He stated calmly.

Wonwoo didn’t know what to say, he was ready for a fight. Clearly not having expected to be indirectly complimented by his crush, he let his thoughts fall through, instead, ‘Wow, that’s a pretty long time.’

 

‘How long was your longest?’

The older answered the question, absentmindedly, his brain not yet able to process where that random question was coming from, let alone analyse its meaning, ‘Two years…’

Mingyu nodded understandingly, then Wonwoo remembered that conversations were a two-way thing, ‘Ummm, and you?’

 

‘5 months.’

Wonwoo physically blanched in shock, how was that even possible, someone as hot and perfect as Mingyu? How? he voiced his thoughts, leaving out the parts where Mingyu was "hot" and "perfect", but making sure his tone conveyed his feelings of scepticism. 

‘So you know how I moved to the states at thirteen, right?’ he didn’t. But he nodded, anyway. ‘I kinda had a hard time trying to fit in, learning the language and the culture. So mostly, I kept to myself…’ that was hard to believe, considering his current personality was particularly bright and outgoing.

Mingyu continued, ‘I focused all my energy on school instead, and only had my first relationship in the second year of university… but you know what it’s like, I had no time and I felt guilty about that, constantly. So, we broke up. Never dated after that.’

 

Mingyu mirrored his actions on the desk, so that their folded arms were touching at the elbows, heads close and aligned. He blinked lazily and Wonwoo tried to figure things out. He knew that relationships in university were almost impossible to maintain, sometimes even the strongest of bonds and truest feelings of love couldn’t withstand the sheer amount of stress, temptation and responsibility. Thus, he knew that most couples didn’t survive the brutality, he could also imagine that it must have been much worse for a student of Harvard. What he couldn’t understand however, was the part about it being Mingyu’s last time. Why? Did that person mean so much to him, that he couldn’t move on? Was he completely wasting his time, hoping to be with someone who was still hung up on their previous love?

 

With bated breath and a raging heart, he asked,

‘Why haven’t you dated after that?’

 

Mingyu pursed his lips, seemingly in thought, then he fixed his ardent gaze on him,

‘I stopped looking. Because I believed love would come to me in the end.’

 

‘So, you’re just gonna wait around?’ He really didn’t understand, things didn’t just come, you had to go get it. He decided to shut his thoughts and bury them at the bottom of the ocean, when he realised how hypocritical he sounded. Wonwoo didn’t have the right to advise anyone when he couldn’t even follow his own advice.

‘I‘ve stopped waiting now, I feel like it might’ve come to me.’

A sharp crack appeared in the centre of his heart, he kept the hurt tone at bay, ‘Oh. You- met someone? Recently?’

‘I might have… Anyway, did you need something?’

 

Well, _that_ was totally cryptic, did he mean yes or no? Wonwoo was side-tracked though, he lost count on how often Mingyu did that to him.

But this time, he was grateful for the distraction, ‘I need a new phone. I was gonna go buy one now.’ He told him what happened earlier with the conference call and the “incompetent” employee who was just an unfortunate guy, that couldn’t really be blamed. The true culprit in this scenario was his phone and the thing couldn’t even be punished for the mess it’s caused, because it was _already_ dead.

‘I’ll go with you.’ Mingyu was already out of his chair and across the room, before Wonwoo could even begin to find his voice, then he realised if Mingyu wanted to come, then that was entirely his decision to make.

 

 

He wouldn’t stop him, nor would he pretend like he didn’t want him here, there and everywhere. Because he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, the reason for this incredibly late update, is because I'm dumb & lost half of this chapter today. So I had to re-write the whole thing & THAT was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
> 
> On a good note, I like this version better than the one I lost, sorry it's late but I hope you enjoy. I'll try not to lose half of my chapter next time >_<
> 
>  
> 
> Follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there, but we can chat & stuff :) Don't be afraid to DM moi, I like talking with you guys ;D
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	28. Chapter 28

‘Yes, that’s fine.’ He rolled his eyes when the employee was no longer facing him. 

Finally, after over 40 minutes of negotiations he’d reached a deal that worked both for his technological needs _and_ his wallet.

It still wasn’t cheap by any means, but it was the cheapest he’d get for a decent phone with a decent monthly plan. Wonwoo hated spending money and shopping, making choices and seeing his hard-earned money evaporate, was heart-breaking, not to mention tedious.

 

‘Alright sir, that’ll be 650,000 Won, please. Would you like to pay cash or by card?’

He _had_ expected a large sum but that still didn’t stop him from flinching away at the price. The knowledge that he wouldn’t get anything better and that he really needed this, was the only thing forcing him to shoot a gaping hole in his finances. Not that he was a Scrooge, but he kind of was. Wonwoo really and truly despised spending, he hated to see his balance dwindle and disappear aimlessly. He was a saver and this unforeseen expense was eating into his precious savings. There was no way he could possibly be happy about that.

Reaching into his left coat pocket, he felt around for his wallet, fingers skimming the broken phone, some tissue and what felt like a 500 Won coin. He frowned, right hand going in his right coat pocket, he pulled the inner lining inside out, his eyes widened.

Nothing, it was empty.

Wonwoo panicked, did he not bring his wallet? This was so unlike him; how did he not remember that.

 

He grimaced searching for the brown wallet in his trousers instead, already knowing that it wouldn’t be in there, he would’ve felt it, if it was. Nevertheless, he began frantically tapping himself down, nothing, he tried the back pockets, also nothing. Fuck.

What a complete waste of time this turned out to be, finding the cheapest serviceable iPhone, haggling on the monthly costs and fighting for the lowest prices on everything, it was now all for nothing. 

He sighed, apologising to the helpful lady employee and stomping over to where Mingyu was stood by a wooden counter, messing around with an iPad.

He huffed, leaning with his back on the counter and his hands in the pockets of his cream coat. Wonwoo was scowling quite deeply, but he was that mad at himself that he didn’t even notice how creepy he looked. In hindsight, he felt sorry for causing the innocent shoppers unnecessary fright.

 

Mingyu noticed it though, poking a tanned finger into his cheek and keeping it there. Wonwoo didn’t bother looking at him, or even removing the finger, gaze firmly fixed on the ground. ‘What’s the matter, Squishy?’ His voice was teasing, but there was a subtle hint of concern hidden behind the playful tone.

‘Forgot my fucking wallet.’ He spat angrily, sometimes he really hated himself.

Mingyu grabbed his smaller hand and began walking back the way he’d come.

 

He had no time to comprehend what was happening, as he was being dragged via a hand entwined with his own, towards the same female employee that he’d embarrassed himself in front of.

The shorter tugged at their hands, dug his heels into the floor, in an effort to slow them down. But the floor was polished marble and his dress shoes just slid on the smooth surface instead of coming to a stop, like he needed them to.

He resorted to hitting the younger, when they stopped at the counter and he finally realised what he was planning, but before he could, Mingyu was already chatting to the lady.

His husky drawl and charming smile surfacing as he spoke, he could tell she was enjoying it too. Her face had been blank and fake cheery when he’d been talking to her, now she was all giggly and shy. He didn’t like that.

But more importantly what was Mingyu doing? He decided to ask, as the lady got preoccupied with typing something in her tablet.

 

He craned his neck, hissing into his ear, ‘what are you doing?’ Mingyu pulled him closer by the waist instead of answering, palm flat on the small of his back as he rubbed small circles there with his thumb. Making him lose his composure with every full round.

But he continued speaking to the girl as if he wasn’t doing any of that, Wonwoo squirmed trying to subtly create some distance between them. They were in public, and the last thing he wanted were more eyes on him. 

‘Mingyu, stop that.’ He whisper-yelled, tone harsh. The said boy tightened his arm around his small waist and Wonwoo rolled his eyes, completely annoyed and self-conscious.

 

He was being ignored again. Wonwoo glared up at the younger, just in time to witness Mingyu’s smooth-talking methods in action. The older boy gaped internally, watching how Mingyu’s husky tone lowered, his normally intense eye contact becoming more attentive on their target, then a subtle flash of canines as he shot the blushing lady an inherently charming smile. He couldn’t even blame her, he fell for the same tricks too.

Scowling, he stepped on his foot, deliberately. How dare he do that, then ignore him, then smile so charmingly at her?

 

The younger flinched, smile faltering as he hissed in pain. Wonwoo grinned satisfied with the reaction. That is, until his jaw literally dropped because the younger’s following actions were _that_ shockingly startling.

 

Mingyu pulled him impossibly closer, his body jolting in surprise at the sudden force, a small gasp escaped his parted lips, ‘Behave.’ He growled into his ear, pinching his side lightly.

Wonwoo did. Behave, that is.

Not because of the younger’s order, but rather due to the way in which he’d growled it, right by the shell of his ear, which was now glowing red with embarrassment. Safe to say, it wasn’t the only red thing on his body, his face was blazing, and he swore he was about to break into a nervous sweat.

 

He licked his lips, biting the inside of his cheek to keep calm. His body was tucked in Mingyu’s side, in this position he had no choice but to face him, while the younger looked forward, still chattering with the employee.

By this point, Wonwoo had no idea what the hell they were discussing, but he had bigger things to worry about. Like his frantic heartbeat, for instance. Could Mingyu feel it?

 

Ignoring the uncomfortable strain of his neck, he continued to observe the younger’s face, he was so close that all Wonwoo needed to do was purse his lips and they’d be grazing Mingyu’s tanned cheek. His breath came out slightly jagged as his lungs filled with Mingyu’s dizzyingly heady scent, the younger’s Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed, and Wonwoo’s pupils darted to the movement, drinking in the moment.

He swallowed thickly, the world around him receding into the background, reduced into insignificantly ambiguous static, which didn’t feel real at all. But the heat from Mingyu’s strong body, his arm around his waist and his own heartbeat were very real and it was all he could feel. Entranced, he felt completely dazed.

So much so, that when a touchscreen stylus appeared before him and Mingyu’s husky whisper of ‘sign it’ seeped into his sensitive ears, he did as he was told. His vision still adjusting and mind reeling from the hot breaths of air that hit the side of his face as Mingyu slurred into his ear. He hadn’t realised anything yet, weakly accepting the pen and almost scribbling his signature, when he froze.

 

 

 

Turning to the younger with an affronted expression, ‘why would I do such a thing?’ his own loud voice startled him, no longer dazed and fully in the here and now.

Reality came hurtling in, almost knocking him off his feet by the force of his shock. Mingyu was paying for his phone, that much was obvious, and he needed a new one so that was _also_ obvious. At least if it happened this way, then he could pay the younger back, he didn’t fancy the thought of carrying the old one around for a minute longer. Not only was the screen completely smashed up but something major also definitely went amiss internally. Since the device, no longer registered calls or texts. It served him no purpose and it didn’t even look pretty, he had to this sort this now. So, did he really mind paying him back later?

 

Mingyu smiled at the bewildered lady, holding up a finger as he muttered ‘Give us a minute…’ and she blushed, why was he such a charismatic bastard. This whole deal wouldn’t have slipped by him unnoticed, if he hadn’t been physically and emotionally harassed by him the whole time.

His glare intensified at their exchange, then Mingyu turned them around, so their backs were to the counter. Leaning in, he spoke in a soft tone, and Wonwoo shivered, then glared some more when the words actually registered,

‘It’s _your_ phone, hyung… If I sign it, then I’d have to pay for your monthly contract as well. I mean I don’t mind, I can do that if yo-’

‘Shut up.’ He snatched the pen from Mingyu’s loose grasp, turning around at the speed of light and jotting his full name on the dotted line. Then he gawked at the screen, his electronic signature was made now, and impossible to take back as the lady confirmed it with a smile and pushed the new device into his frozen palm.

 

He blinked down at it, feeling lightheaded all of a sudden, he thought Mingyu had asked for the phone that he’d previously ordered but couldn’t pay for. But if that was the case, then what the hell was the latest IPhone model doing in his palms? he looked to the lady with wide eyes, shaking his head. He was about to explain how there must’ve been some kind of mistake, he wanted an IPhone 6 not a fucking 10.

 

But that didn’t work out, because Mingyu shoved the phone in Wonwoo’s coat pocket, covered his mouth, smiled at the alarmed lady and basically manhandled him out of the store. It all happened so quickly that he nearly had whiplash, but Wonwoo wasn’t having any of it.

He punched at the younger’s arm and even considered biting the hand over his lips, but then he got intense flashbacks to the night Mingyu moved in. How cute the younger’s pout was as he complained about the pain in his hand and how he was made to kiss it better, then there was that hug which felt more like Mingyu was trying to ingest him, in the best way possible.

Wonwoo shook his head, no biting today, he wouldn’t be able to handle the consequences. He was so lost in thought -he really needed to stop doing that- that he didn’t realise when Mingyu allowed him back on his feet and freed his mouth, instead he was being led via a tanned hand on his forearm down an unfamiliar road, the phone store nowhere in sight.

 

Alarmed, he felt around his pockets. Heart sinking as his cold fingers came into contact with smooth, sleek glass. He groaned in frustration, whining as he pulled at his arm. He didn’t want this, nor did he need it. Was it too late to return it?

Mingyu just held on tighter, and continued walking. Completely disregarding his efforts to get away as he kept his gaze forward, not even looking back to him.

‘Mingyuuuuuu, I don’t want a 10, I can’t afford i-’

The said boy cut off his complaint, all the while dragging him by the arm, to wherever the hell they were going. He didn’t know, and he didn’t care.

 

‘You get paid just as much as I do, you can buy one every month and still have money for everything else.’

Mingyu was infuriating, it wasn’t even his money, what gave him the right to dictate how it was spent.

His footsteps halted on the pavement, he wrenched his arm free and closed his eyes. Taking a deep breath, then his eyes shot open, feeling the determination in his own gaze, ‘That is _not_ how I want to spend _my_ money.’ 

Mingyu looked back at him, gaze gentle. Then smiled, as he turned, looking forward again,

‘Then consider it a gift. You don’t have to pay me back.’ With his back to him, he continued down the road, leaving Wonwoo with nothing to do other than gape at his broad back and tall frame as he strode away with confidence.

 

A gift? Did people randomly give out a 1,600,000 Won gift? No, he didn’t think so.

Unless it was a _very_ special occasion or a _very_ special person.

 

He struggled to think of a single person that he’d willingly do that for, not that he was a mean person, or anything. But he could think of a million other things to do for the people he cared about, things that didn’t involve spending over 65% of his monthly pay-check on.

In this scenario, it was neither a special occasion nor was he a “ _very_ special” person, because friends didn’t qualify for that, nor did roommates. Why would Mingyu do that?

He recalled how his mother had always told him that it was rude to reject gifts, but this was just ludicrous. It was a ridiculous amount of money and he couldn’t accept it, it was simply not an option. Returning it was also off the cards, since he realised that’d be quite a rude thing to do.

He’d have to pay him back, _somehow_. Would Mingyu accept his money? Even if he did, he’d probably find a way to spend it all on him again, anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He caught up with the infuriating boy, but only because the younger was waiting for him at the end of the road.

‘Burger king or fried chicken?’ the question was thrown at him, the moment he was within hearing range,

‘Burger king.’ his answer was immediate, nothing could beat cheeseburgers. But then he glanced at the younger, confusion clear in his eyes, why was he suddenly asking that?

The smile that took over Mingyu’s face at his answer, was brighter than the undying rays of the late afternoon sun. Something akin to fondness sparkled in his eyes, the kind of look one gave to a particularly adorable child, full of affection and pride. Wonwoo wasn’t given much time to analyse the look, because Mingyu threw his arm around his shoulders and steered him in the direction of the main road.

 

Belatedly, he deduced that’s where they were going to eat, of course.

It all made sense now and he felt stupid for his earlier confusion, then a thought materialised in his brain and he felt the need to verbalise it immediately. Injecting his words with a noticeable amount of firmness and warning, he was serious, 

’Don’t even try to pay for this, as well. You will literally be a dead man.’

 

The younger bit his lip, clearly smiling, ‘Sure, babe. You can handle this, I’ll stay out of it.’ Something in the younger’s tone gave him reason to doubt the credibility of his words, but they had a verbal contract now, so he hoped Mingyu wouldn’t try to pay for his food as well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mingyu was humming happily as he bit into his food, almost nearly done, _already_. While, Wonwoo was still picking at his fries, cheeseburger yet to be touched. His pride was hurt, ego destroyed, he was reduced to a pouting, embarrassed child. ‘I’m paying you back, Mingyu.’ He repeated for at least the fifth time in the last 10-minutes.

 

 

They’d arrived at the nearest Burger King joint around 15-minutes ago, ordered their food and Mingyu stepped back, whistling. Wonwoo couldn’t believe his eyes, the younger was _actually_ keeping his word.

Little did he know, that Mingyu _knew_ something _he didn’t_ and was simply waiting for the right moment.

The cashier rattled off their total, and Wonwoo’s hand instinctively went to retrieve his wallet from his left coat pocket, that’s when he realised it. He took a deep breath, steadying himself, he _will_ remain calm, he did _not_ want to get high blood pressure at 24.

 

Mingyu’s sly smile and dubious promise, made sense now. He turned to glare at him with narrowed eyes and the younger shrugged, feigning innocence. Internally, he wanted to scream at Mingyu for deliberately choosing not to remind him that he _couldn’t_ pay, since he had no wallet. Instead, he tricked him and watched him make a fool out of himself.

Wonwoo stormed past a red-faced Mingyu with clenched fists, purposefully bumping into his shoulder. He heard the younger’s muffled laughs as he greeted the bored cashier and proceeded to pay. What an annoying piece of shit.

 

 

 

 

Ten or so minutes later and much of that anger has now dissipated, pure mortification all that remained. The younger found it all very entertaining, the amusement still, clearly shining in his eyes as he attempted to conceal his smiles with the food.

Wonwoo looked away with a huff, crossing his arms on the table as he stared blankly out of the second-floor window. The sun was receding, falling behind the horizon and painting the sky in pretty hues of orange, gold as well as various shades of dark blue and violet. The world beyond the glass was rapidly darkening and he wondered how long they’d been out, hoping it wasn’t too long, since he still had a lot of work to do, that’s when Mingyu cleared his throat,

‘Hyung?...’

 

He turned to the younger so quickly that he would’ve been embarrassed at how eager his body was to appease the younger, if he weren’t already drowning in the feeling.

Mingyu didn’t wait for him to say anything as he continued, ‘What do we do about the food I packed?' 

Wonwoo didn’t mean to, but he scoffed, ‘Since when do you consult me on anything?... You’re always doing what you want, you don’t even care to ask what my opinions are.’ his tone was accusatory, voice full of irritation. Not at the boy himself, because that was simply impossible, but at the younger’s actions and his own reactions.

 

‘Awww, baby… is that how you felt.’ Mingyu cooed, reaching for his hand over the table and sandwiching it between his own, patting it consolingly, as his face scrunched up adorably.

Meanwhile, Wonwoo’s eyes narrowed infinitesimally, doubtful of the younger’s tone. It didn’t sound like he was being sincere at all, it sounded like he was still teasing him, and he didn’t like that. Why wasn’t Mingyu scared of him? he could’ve sworn he was at some point, but now he was out here disrespecting him in broad daylight. When did this happen and most importantly how had he _let_ it happen?

 

‘I promise to ask from now on, so what do you wanna do?’

Oh, right. The food. In his passionate rant, he’d forgotten about that entirely, they’d already eaten, so maybe they could save it for dinner.

Or… a light bulb switched on in his head, Mingyu just promised he’d ask for his opinions and act less on his own accord, he wanted to _test_ that.

 

‘Let’s have a picnic after work.’ He didn’t know what possessed him to say those exact words, but it was a senseless idea, regardless. So, there was no way Mingyu would agree to this, just for the sake of his earlier promise.

 

Mingyu blinked, taken aback, ‘We’re finishing work late, though.’

‘I know that.’ He replied dismissively.

 

‘And it’s still cold outside.’ He reasoned, an adorable hint of confusion in his voice as his eyebrows furrowed below his bangs.

Wonwoo nodded, ‘I know that too.’

 

‘But… but we don’t even have a mat.’ Mingyu looked slightly horrified, tone pleading with Wonwoo to change his mind but the elder simply smiled sweetly. ‘Doesn’t matter, we can sit on the grass.’

 

‘Hyung, are you sure that’s what you want?’

No, no, no. NO. This is _not_ how it was meant to go, Mingyu was meant to freak out and refuse, that way he’d break his promise and Wonwoo would finally have _one_ reason to dislike him. He was _not_ meant to be actually considering this. What the fuck was he supposed to do now?

‘Positive.’ His sizable pride won over in the end, if Mingyu wasn’t backing down then he wouldn’t be either. He wasn’t no wuss.

 

‘Okay. I guess we’re having a picnic tonight, then’

Wonwoo was startled, he clenched his teeth stopping his jaw from falling to the dirty restaurant floor. He loved their food, but he had to admit, their hygiene wasn’t on point.

The smile that he plastered on his face was clearly fake and his tone noticeably strained as he spoke, ‘Good. I’m excited.’

He wasn’t, they’d freeze if the temperature fell any lower. There was _nothing_ exciting about that.

 

‘Hangang park is only a 15-minute walk from work, we could go there later.’ This wasn’t good, Mingyu was taking this very seriously, while Wonwoo was panicking because the younger was doing this for _him_ , but he didn’t even want it.

 

He bit back his words, ‘Sure.’

 

Wonwoo hated how impulsive he was sometimes, but it was too late to take that back now. So apparently, he was having a night picnic, in sub-zero temperatures later.

The _joy_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO pacw0man! I hope you've had a lovely day today and I wish you health & happiness always. Thank you for reading my story & always telling me nice things <3
> 
> SO PEOPLE, I like this chapter, but I like Friday's chapter a lot more. I think it wouldn't be too bad if you got a little excited for it. Huhuhu,
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to talk to you guys <3
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	29. Chapter 29

At 27 minutes past 9pm, Wonwoo was waiting.

Drumming a mindless beat on his thigh, eyes closed in a feeling of dread for all the work he _still_ had to do tomorrow. He huffed internally, scowling outwardly, all whilst leaning against a wall, adjacent to the elevator on the ground floor.

 

The ground floor of Pledis Inc. comprised of a reception area, where visitors and business partners, normally sat on the modern furniture, waiting to be seen by the reception staff. The place served its purpose well, having an overall welcoming atmosphere, but this late at night there was hardly much to welcome, seeing as he was currently, the only occupant.

It was quiet and clean for the most part. Industrial ceiling lights lit up the lobby, reflecting on the shiny light-coloured floors. Providing a nice contrast to its’ glossy finish were the matte walls, painted a muted tan colour. Pleasant decor in the form of framed A1 print outs hung on the walls, featuring bestsellers published by Pledis, or random artwork that fit the aesthetic. It was all very visually appealing, and he was surprised every time at how well presented it was.

 

His appreciation of the workplace was cut short when his brand-new shiny phone vibrated in his pocket. Opening his eyes, he held the device with both hands, careful not to drop it as he read the new message.

 

**-Come to the studio**

**-I’ve got work for you**

**9:29pm**

**-How did you know I got a new phone?**

**9:29pm**

**-Soonyoung told me**

**9:30pm**

**-Who told him?**

**9:30pm**

 

The elevator doors slid open, the previously quiet lobby filling with the loud chatters and laughter of its new occupants. Their receding footsteps, heading for the general direction of the large glass doors, as they most likely went home for the day. He didn’t look up from his phone as he received Jihoon’s reply.

 

**-How the fuck would I know?**

**-When can you come?**

**9:30pm**

 

A shadow fell over him as he mentally went through his schedule, he glanced up from the bright device, eyes connecting with the owner of the shadow. His presence much brighter than the light of his phone, despite engulfing him in darkness as he blocked the light with his ridiculous height. He looked back to the device in his palms as he typed back.

 

**-Some time over the weekend.**

**9:31pm**

 

Mingyu stood directly next to him on the wall, “directly”, meaning that their shoulders were practically glued together and the younger was leaning into him. Arm snaking around his waist and head lowering on his shoulder, he was bombarded with Mingyu’s scent and the warmth radiating off his body made him want to dissolve into a puddle of slushy mess. When his phone vibrated again, he was very grateful for the distraction.

 

**-Come on a weekday, I can’t do this weekend.**

**9:33pm**

**-Wednesday, after work?**

**9:33pm**

**-Cool.**

**-Don’t be late.**

**9:34pm**

 

He locked the phone and placed it in his pocket as soon as he read the replies, stepping away from the wall, he extended an arm to the younger, ‘let’s go.’

Mingyu looked to the outstretched hand and back up to Wonwoo’s expressionless face. The older fought to keep it that way as Mingyu’s face lit up with a blinding grin, linking his long arm with Wonwoo’s and pulling him along.

The shorter boy bit back a smile, he couldn’t help it, Mingyu made him feel things.

Nevertheless, he couldn’t believe they were actually doing this, a picnic at almost 10pm, in the freezing cold, mat-less, for goodness sake. The ridiculousness of the situation didn’t stop him from leaning his body into the younger as they began the pleasant 15-minute walk. Arms linked and identical giddy smiles on their faces, which neither boy could see, since they were both looking ahead, as trees and vast green spaces replaced concrete and glass buildings.

 

Nearing the entrance of the huge public park, Wonwoo’s wistful tone mused out-loud, ‘We should come back in daytime.’ his own voice startling the calmness between them. Mingyu hummed in reply and Wonwoo hadn’t a clue what that meant.

He grimaced, having not meant to say that sentence out loud. The words just slipped out as he imagined how much prettier the greenery would look under a bright blue sky. Sun overhead, with fluffy white clouds and birds flying freely in intricate formations.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Under the vast, seemingly void abyss of the night sky. Stretching on for infinity as it cloaked them with its unfathomable blackness, he couldn’t help but wish for a smattering of sparkles; a star or two, to offset the depressing darkness above them.

The stretch of moist grass was as isolated as before, except for the two young souls that occupied it. Beyond the grass and as far as his eyes could see was the Han river, the artery of the city, more skyscrapers and dazzling city lights, blinked distantly in the horizon.

He smiled softly, turning to his left where Mingyu’s eyes twinkled brighter than the city. Humour shining in his warm brown orbs, as he retold him the story of how Chanyeol’s car refused to start after their short rest stop, half-way to Seoul yesterday.

‘You didn’t have to give up your car, though.’ He mumbled through a mouth full of kimchi fried rice, watching as Mingyu watched him eat. Since the beast was already finished.

‘As the team leader, it made sense to stay back. Besides, the younger ones and ladies should go first.’ 

Wonwoo hummed thoughtfully, the younger really was incredibly kind and considerate.

 

He tried to think what he would’ve done in such a situation, but his mind raised a blank because he couldn’t even drive, so why would he own a car.

Either way, he knew he wouldn’t have displayed the degree of gentleman and selflessness that Mingyu had. It was truly admirable, and his heart swelled with pride, because could he get any more perfect?

‘I can’t even trust people with my phone, let alone a whole car. What if they crashed it.’ Wonwoo shuddered at the thought, his statement even truer now that he had the IPhone X, he definitely couldn’t trust anyone with that, not even himself if he was being very honest. But he had no choice apparently, so the phone was staying.

 

Mingyu tapped Wonwoo’s nose with a tanned index finger, ‘Don’t be a meanie. You have to trust others sometimes and look, my car’s still good isn’t it?’ he wiped his nose with the back of his hand in fake irritation.

The younger was right, but he just didn’t like the idea of a stranger taking over what was _his_. The night breeze was softly tousling his fringe and gently blowing on his pink cheeks -that seemed to be their default colour around Mingyu.

The weather was still much too cold for a night picnic but when Mingyu shuffled closer to him, arm over his shoulders and palm gently guiding his head to lean on him, the frost was suddenly bearable.

With his face in Mingyu’s warm chest, he allowed himself to smile and snuggle closer, Mingyu couldn’t see him anyway.

Or so he thought, but he was forced to rethink that statement when his cheek was pinched, ‘Owww... that hurts.’ He slapped Mingyu’s hand away and rubbed at his flaming cheek. It didn’t actually hurt, but he couldn’t think of anything else to say.

 

‘Sorry babe, you’re just so cute.’ 

‘I’m not cute, you are.’ He blushed crimson, pretty sure he hadn’t meant to say that last part aloud. Shit.

 

‘I’m pretty sure you’re the cutest thing that ever lived, don’t argue with me on that.’

He groaned, his heart galloping in delight, ‘Whatever.’

 

 

 

 

There was a lull in conversation, during which they were enveloped in a comfortable silence. Wonwoo got preoccupied picking the tiny lint off Mingyu’s woolly black jumper, when the younger’s voice startled him, his head on the younger’s chest feeling the vibrations as he spoke,

‘Wonwon, Woni?’

 

‘What’re you doing?’ His tone was half-confused, half-irritated, because he hated those nicknames.

‘Your mum calls you that, right?’

Wonwoo’s eyes narrowed into slits, head shooting up at the mention of his mother, ‘why do you know that?’

 

‘She told me.’ Tone nonchalant and gaze fixed upwards at the night sky, Wonwoo huffed and went back to snuggling the younger’s chest.

 

‘You talk to my mum?’

‘Last time we spoke, you were the one that gave her the phone.’

Right, he remembered how he wanted to know what they talk about, he wasn’t interested in that anymore, but it was still strange. He’d been getting his luggage in the car, that night during Christmas break, preparing to head down to his grandparents’ place.

Wonwoo nodded in understanding, ‘Maybe I should talk to your mum as well. Since mine seems to be telling you things.’ He wasn’t even serious, it was a joke. But the humour was lost on Mingyu as he answered seriously,

‘I don’t think it’d work, you don’t enjoy small talk and anyway, time zones would totally mess it up.’

 

‘Time zones? I thought your parents lived here.’ Wonwoo was very confused, very obvious by his tone.

Mingyu’s answer was very simple, not giving anything away, ‘They live in the states.’

Wonwoo sat up, legs crossed as he blanked, ‘Oh.’

 

They lived in the states? Then where was Mingyu over Christmas break? How did he end up living in Seoul alone? Why didn’t he stay there with them? He had so many questions and it suddenly dawned on him how very little he knew about his close friend, roommate and crush. He lowered his gaze, suddenly finding the dewy grass below him very interesting as embarrassment clawed at his being.

 

He looked up when he heard Mingyu’s low chuckle, ‘You know if you want me to tell you, you can just ask.’

His eyes widened, mouth gaping open. Was he that obvious, he rushed to deny it, ‘But I- No, I mean I don- FINE. Tell me.’ After stuttering and stumbling over his words he gave up, dropping his red face in his palms as his eyes stung with mortification.

 

‘Cute.’ Mingyu ruffled his hair and pulled him closer again, he tried to relax and pay attention to the melodic timber of the younger’s voice as he explained his family situation to him. Starting with why they moved to America in the first place.

 

 

 

Mingyu’s father worked for a car dealership and his company placed him in New York, the other side of the globe. After years of going back and forth between seeing his family and work, he decided he couldn’t bare the distance any longer. But it was a good job and paid really well, so the family was faced with a dilemma. Somehow, they arrived at the conclusion to move there, after weighing out all their options.

That’s how naive, friendly, 12-year-old Mingyu found himself in an unfamiliar country, with an unfamiliar language and unfamiliar customs. He was no longer the funny, outgoing kid that was everyone’s favourite, now he was just the new lanky Asian kid. The language barrier was by far his biggest struggle, he couldn’t communicate effectively in English and that took a large bite out of his confidence, he resorted to existing peacefully and focusing all his time and energy on school. In his second year of high school he’d finally made his very first friend in the states, a Chinese exchange student by the name of Xu Minghao.

Now there was a new lanky Asian kid, the situation was so reminiscent of his own, that he chose to take him under his wing, showing him the ropes and saving him of some of the lonely times that he’d been through.

Little did he know that his impulsive decision would lead him to almost a decade of beautiful friendship, filled to the brim with delightful memories.

 

The two soon became inseparable, doing everything together, from matching their schedules to eating the same foods. They stayed over at the other’s place so often, that their families always prepared an extra serving of dinner, even before they showed up.

 

 

 

But then Mingyu had a dream, he wanted to go to Harvard and Minghao wanted to dance, so the summer following their high school graduation they shared a heart-breaking goodbye. Mingyu heading up to Massachusetts for a business degree at Harvard, leaving behind his best friend, whom would be starting a degree in dance at Juilliard. Although both boys got into their prestigious schools of choice and followed their adolescent dreams, their farewell was incredibly bittersweet.

They thought they’d drift apart, being a four-hour train journey away from your bestie wasn’t easy, but the pair made it work. If anything, it strengthened their friendship and Mingyu came home at least three times a year to visit, so it worked out in the end.

 

Four tough, rewarding years later and it was graduation day for both of them. They’d done exceptionally well, Minghao top of his class and Mingyu not far behind, an endless sky of opportunities and doors upon open doors of options awaited them. But even then, Minghao’s long distance boyfriend wanted to finally meet him and Joshua, Mingyu’s older college friend kept pestering him with job offers at his father’s company in Seoul. The pestering intensifying, when Joshua became the CEO himself, as his father thought his son competent enough and went into early retirement.

When Mingyu discovered that Minghao’s boyfriend also lived and worked in Seoul. The decision became clear to them, quite straightforward, the high school besties would be moving to Seoul together.

No one understood why they did it, even their own families opposed to the idea at first.

“You’ve worked so hard to get such prestigious qualifications, why throw it away?” Became a familiar overused sentence, that they heard daily. But both boys were adamant, they knew what they wanted and refused to back down until their families finally gave them the green light.

 

 

 

‘...And here I am. Living with you, because Minghao and his boyfriend are too loud at night.’ Mingyu finished with a chuckle.

Stars twinkled -albeit, very faintly- in the dark sky. Too faint to be noticed easily, but he’d been staring at it for as long as Mingyu spoke and detected the weak glows. The combination of the younger’s hushed husky tone and the peaceful darkness, cloaking him in relaxation and easing away the tension of his hectic day.

 

‘Wow...’ It was barely a whisper, but it was all he could manage. He’d assumed the younger’s life was just as dull and unexciting as his own, but hearing the dynamic life story, he was proved utterly wrong.

Mingyu had been through a lot, his caring, determined nature shining through the story even as a young child.

 

 

Wonwoo fell for him a _little_ harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's not the longest thing ever... but let me know if you like it, plz  
> ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) 
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to talk to you guys <3
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE MUTHAFATHAS!!!
> 
> I think you can tell that this was meant to be part of 29 BUT it would've been almost 5000 words & I felt that was waaay too much for just one part.
> 
> Still, I didn't wanna keep you waiting till Monday, so here it is. 2 updates IN 1 day. Thanks to Val for helping me reach this conclusion <3
> 
>  
> 
> ENJOY!!! I hope...

‘Wow...’ It was barely a whisper, but it was all he could manage. He’d assumed the younger’s life was just as dull and unexciting as his own, but hearing the dynamic life story, he was proved utterly wrong.

Mingyu had been through a lot, his caring, determined nature shining through the story even as a young child.

 

Wonwoo fell for him a little harder, Mingyu’s voice dragging him in _that_ much deeper as he spoke up again,

‘I’m glad I moved here, I wouldn’t have met you otherwise.’

 

At some point in time, somehow, he ended up lying down with his head in Mingyu’s lap again, the younger’s gentle fingers combing through his soft hair. He closed his eyes enjoying the feeling. The next words slipping past his relaxed brain and pouring through his parted lips, before he even realised he was speaking,

‘I’m glad you did. I like having you around.’

A spell of silence followed, he hoped it wasn’t because of his cheesy slip up. In his defence, Mingyu’s earlier words were even cheesier so it couldn’t be that. He kept his eyes clenched shut and tried to relax.

 

‘Hyung?...’

Mingyu’s dreamy voice was the first to break the silence.

 

‘Yeah?’ the hint of caution in his tone was betraying the false calm which he failed to embody.

 

‘...You really like the sky huh?’

 

‘Yeah.’ He breathed and would’ve nodded too, but his head was in Mingyu’s lap and he wasn’t 4-years-old so he decided against it.

 

‘Hyung?...’ Mingyu’s voice was uncharacteristically small and uncertain.

 

Wonwoo tensed, ‘Yeah?’

 

‘...umm... I-’

His heart picked up the pace, Mingyu was always confident in his speech and Wonwoo was feeling paranoid at the sudden change. Was it something bad?

 

‘Just say it, Gyu.’ His paranoia must’ve leaked into his impatient tone, because Mingyu seemed startled at his order. ‘What?! No. I-I don’t- it’s not like tha-’

 

 

Wonwoo sat up, their crossed legs side-by-side, then he deadpanned to conceal his curiosity, fixing the younger with a bored expression.

‘Since when do you hold back, Gyu? You’re always spewing all kinds of bullshit.’

 

‘This is kinda serious, though.’ He looked and sounded sheepish, which was a sight to behold, because Mingyu was never sheepish. It was adorable.

‘Just. Say. It. Cuz, I swear if you “umm h-hyung” me _one_ more time, I _will_ kill you.’

 

Mingyu looked offended now, holding up a hand as he frowned, ‘Okay first of all, my voice is _not_ that high-pitched and secon-’

Wonwoo cut him off, ‘It SO is, you sound like a screaming bitch.’ He giggled and Mingyu pushed at his chest light-heartedly, feeling calmer at the simple exchange.

‘As I was saying, before I was rudely interrupted. I need advice. Kinda... not really. Actually, I guess I just want your opinion on something.’ The younger looked quite indecisive, a myriad of expressions filtering across his face as he spoke.

 

‘6 meals and 7 coffees’ Wonwoo placed his elbow on his crossed knee and cradled his face in the palm.

Mingyu turned to him, face the picture of confusion, ‘What? Why? You hate coffee.’

 

Fact. But he wanted to tease the younger, especially after he’d been on the receiving end of the younger’s relentless teasing all day, ‘You think my advice is free? Do I look like a bitch to you?’

‘Yes.’ Wonwoo was surprised at Mingyu’s ability to keep a straight face.

‘Damn, wasn’t expecting that... And you’re not supposed to answer rhetorical questions, you fucking stupid idiot.’

Mingyu gasped, hand on his heart in mock hurt, ‘That’s harsh. But I know you don’t mean it, so it’s cool.’ Then he was back to smiling again.

Wonwoo wanted to smile along, instead he sighed and tried one last time to get a fun reaction out of the younger, ‘Sure, sweetheart.’ But that backfired.

Mingyu winked, and made kissy faces at him, Wonwoo outwardly scowled in disgust while his insides rejoiced.

 

‘So... what is it?’

Mingyu took a second to compose himself, smile replaced with a tone of caution as he cleared his throat, ‘Ummm, it’s... about a friend.’ Wonwoo sat straighter, nodding encouragingly to the younger,

‘He... got really drunk one night and I had to carry him home...’ Wonwoo couldn’t relate already, he hated alcohol and only drunk a maximum of 3 or 4 times the whole of last year. Alcoholics were the worst, he didn’t know this guy, but he hated him already.

‘So he’s normally kinda reserved and doesn’t enjoy socialising much. He’s got this cold, edgy look but he’s really a lovely guy under all that pretence... And… he hardly smiles, even though he should definitely do it more.’

The fondness that shone in his chocolatey eyes and dripped off his loving tone, was very much palpable. Whoever this was, it was obvious they meant a great deal to the younger. Maybe not just a “friend” as he claimed, Wonwoo knew he had no right to be jealous but that didn’t change the fact that he was.

 

‘Sorry, Gyu. But, your friend sounds like an asshole already.’ Mingyu snorted, his eyes shining with amusement and Wonwoo stared, blank and serious, as the younger continued.

‘So he changed completely when he got drunk. Hugging, acting cute, he kept clinging onto me and even kissed my cheeks.’

 

‘Woah! The “cold” guy that hates “socialising” did that?’

Mingyu nodded aggressively, it seemed like Wonwoo wasn’t the only one having a hard time believing it.

‘That’s so weird. You must’ve been so scared.’ Something akin to admiration blossomed in Wonwoo’s heart, he doubted he could put up with such a shock, friend or not.

‘I wouldn’t say I was scared. Maybe a little... taken-aback that he could be like that as well... But, Imma tell you something else he did, and I want you to tell me what you truly think.’ Wonwoo nodded his head understandingly, laying back down, head resting on Mingyu’s thigh as the latter combed his fingers through the silky locks.

Some of his jealousy evaporated at the affectionate head rub, ‘Feels good, Gyu. Keep doing that’ He hummed in content,

 

‘Are you even listening to me? You seem to be too busy being a cutie.’

Blushing fiercely, he fought to remain calm, ‘I’m a great multitasker. Doing both right now, so carry on...’ he trailed off, listening as the younger went on,

‘He kissed me...’

 

‘Tell me the other thing he did, you’ve mentioned that part already.’ He pointed out briskly, closing his eyes in bliss, as the heavenly pads of Mingyu’s fingers messaged his scalp.

‘On the... lips.’

 

 

Wonwoo was stunned to silence, even his heart stopped beating for a second. The feeling of complete shock intensifying, because all his fried brain and silent heart could come up with in that moment was,

‘His breath must’ve fucking stank.’

 

It was silent for a while after that, Mingyu also probably shocked at how dumb that statement was. Then the younger replied, unable to hold back a small series of laughs.

‘I- honestly, I don’t remember if it did...’ his fingers got to work again, doing blissfully delightful things, that melted some of the pressure away.

‘So? What do you think I should do?’ The younger continued, sounding genuinely curious,

‘About?...’ Wonwoo’s brain was yet to return after the shock and he was feeling genuinely lost, the asshole put a “what” On Mingyu’s lips? He couldn’t remember.

‘The kiss?’

‘Oh... why would you need to do anything about that?’ Now he chose to pretend that he didn’t hear it. Did Mingyu like this guy? Was he asking for Wonwoo’s advice, so he could make a move on that asshole? Did this have anything to do with his cryptic words about not having to “wait anymore for love” to find him? Is that what this was?

 

‘Because.’

‘That’s not a fucking answer, Gyu... Do you like him?’ Wonwoo steeled himself, what would he do if Mingyu liked this guy? What would he do if he didn’t? he didn’t know what to do either way nor did he think he had the courage to risk what they currently had.

‘Of course, I do. We’re close friends.’

 

He gave up the magical fingers. Sitting up on the dewy grass only to slap the back of the younger’s head. He deserved it too, for saying such stupid things. The latter hissed in pain as he cradled his head. Wonwoo laid back down on the muscled thigh, satisfied with the reaction,

‘You know what I mean.’ He spat at him, not even knowing why he was suddenly feeling angry.

‘Romantically?...’ Mingyu voiced, unsure and Wonwoo nodded, waiting with bated breath as he watched the younger’s thoughtful expression, while the younger looked straight into his eyes.

 

Suddenly, Mingyu looked away but Wonwoo caught a faint pinkish tint to the boy’s natural bronzed cheeks. He ignored the slight jab of pain and forced himself to smile when he heard the younger’s small voice mumble.

‘Maybe... but I don’t know if he likes me like that?’

Wonwoo was too worked up to catch the questioning tone in the younger’s statement, blinded by jealousy and rage. Not a good combination.

‘I thought you were close with this guy?’

‘I... am. But we haven’t known each other _that_ long.’

Then why’re you so hung up on the asshole. The question was fighting to be voiced but Wonwoo had enough rational sense to deny it of ever leaving.

‘Does he remember the... kiss?’ He asked instead,

‘I haven’t... talked to him about it. I don’t think he remembers though.’ Wonwoo sighed dramatically at the younger’s answer, scowling in pure disdain at Mingyu’s crush.

‘Such an asshole, your “friend”.’ Mingyu let out a loud laugh, snorting midway through and the world looked brighter thanks to his melodious laughter. Wonwoo didn’t know exactly what he’d said to elicit that reaction, but the tall boy seemed happy, so he’d take it.

 

It was Mingyu’s turn to sigh, the young boy leaned back, hands on the grass supporting his weight as the shinning lights in the sky reflected in his beady eyes. He murmured lovingly, ‘He’s an amazing guy, I wish he knew that.’

He sounded sober, all traces of the previous giggly outburst gone, his eyes twinkled with emotion, too intense for Wonwoo’s own to handle when that gaze was directed from the sky back to him, so he broke the contact again.

 

‘Why don’t you tell him that.’ Wonwoo blurted, sounding irritated and flustered as a hint of jealousy slipped into his tone. In his defence, he was trying to be civil and happy for the younger boy, he deserved to be loved. But it was hard listening to your crush rave and rant about _their_ crush -especially, when it wasn’t you.

 

‘I’ll tell him... someday.’ His voice turned whimsical and his smile broadened into a grin.

‘Cool.’ Pretending not to care, when his insides were being torn apart and ravaged by a vicious war, proved to be very difficult, his eyes stung with tears, so he closed them.

‘Hyung?... what would you do?’

 

Wonwoo collected his mind and his voice, finally opening his eyes after a while, ‘If my drunk crush kissed me?’

Mingyu blushed deeply, then nodded while biting his plumb bottom lip. Too hot.

 

He imagined a drunk Mingyu. First of all, he wouldn’t be _as_ shocked since the younger was naturally quite affectionate. Secondly, he would most certainly die young, if he attempted to carry him. Not only was Mingyu freakishly tall but he was also packed full of lean muscle. He didn’t have a death wish, thank you very much. Finally, he had a hard time imagining how he’d change as a drunk. Would he be even _more_ clingy? Or turn rude and aggressive? Either way, if Mingyu kissed him, he’d probably die and go to hell.

Heaven, if Mingyu remembered, but since the younger’s question implied not remembering, then he’d be in a personal hell.

Just the thought of locking lips with his handsome friend and then have the other fail to remember it, was a daunting image. Particularly due to the fact that he’d be sober and thus be able to recall the events with superior detail, it had him feeling simultaneously lightheaded and severely depressed. He didn’t know how he’d live with himself, knowing he’d missed all that.

 

‘I don’t know... I don’t think I’d do anything.’ He replied honestly, he didn’t know what he’d do. Part of him would probably want to tell Mingyu, but part of him would be too scared to mention it.

Just in case, it was taken the wrong way, or he’d misread the signs and actually, the other wasn’t even interested. He also didn’t want to give his full opinion, since he’d hate to influence the younger’s decision.

Imagine knowing your crush was dating someone else because you told him it’d be a good idea, that’d be _so_ dumb. If Mingyu chose to be with that asshole-ish guy, then he could personally make that choice.

Wonwoo wanted _nothing_ to do with them, if they ever got together he’d try to move on happily as he watched from the side-lines. He pursed his lips in determination, deciding he wouldn’t be meddling in their relationship, if they ever started dating, he hoped not.

However, as jealous as he was, Mingyu wasn’t his, so he knew where to draw the line.

 

Deep in thought, he naturally had no clue what was happening around him, so he wasn’t ready for the warm lips that settled on his exposed forehead. His eyelids fluttered shut as the icicles around his cold heart melted, drowning the overwhelmed organ in the unexpectedly sweet warmth.

 

Fuck Mingyu’s crush, he’s with me now.

 

The triumphant thought rampaged through his mind, wrecking his organised decisions and flipping all his predetermined opinions upside down. Did he say, “he’d move on happily” and “watch” not “meddle”? Because was he even thinking straight?

 

Mingyu’s fingers were back to playing with his hair and he had to hold back from moaning in bliss. How could he possibly even consider giving all of this up so easily? In that moment he decided he wouldn’t go down without a fight.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sure, he’d be heartbroken and depressed if it didn’t work out, but he’d be the happiest man alive if it did. That’s why risks were so scary because the outcome was unknown, but he’d take a risk this time.

Because his crush was worth it.

He was worth it.

Mingyu was worth it.

As he closed his eyes, listening to the rhythmic beat of his contended heart, fingers stroking through his hair. He was lulled to sleep by the distant sound of footsteps as people walked by and the softly flowing Han beyond. Under the cloudy dark Seoul skies, in the freezing weather, he was feeling warm, safe and comforted.

Wonwoo could only hope the risk pays off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, see yall Monday. Adios.
> 
>  
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do anything on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to talk to you guys <3
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	31. Chapter 31

Wonwoo woke up the next morning feeling like he was incredibly late to work. He felt around his night stand for the new phone, hand carelessly slapping around the table, hitting his glasses. He wasn’t worried though, those things were surprisingly durable, surviving his frequent accidents and negligent placements.

His undeterred hand continued roaming, next, he smacked what felt like a pen, which by the sound of it, rolled off the stand, hitting the carpeted floor with an incredibly faint thump.

Whoops, he paused for a second, then resumed. Eyes still closed, since he was determined to keep them that way, what could he say? He loved his sleep.

Taking more care, he developed a new strategy. Now, calmly systematic in his search rather than haphazardly frantic, his fingers unintentionally caressed the cool perimeter of a glass, most likely containing water.

He avoided that area, then he came in contact with something smooth, his eyebrows furrowed, eyes still clenched shut. He knew this feeling, fingertips sliding on the surface, it was more spongy and cushiony rather than hard and unimpressionable.

It strangely felt like- like leather. His hand flinched away as if he’d been burnt. It couldn’t be that, could it? His mind was reeling so he decided to ignore it for now.

 

Keeping his eyes firmly closed, he felt around the surface some more, index and middle finger walking along, until his middle finger landed on something, he knew immediately, that it was that overpriced piece of technology. Grabbing the sleek cool device, he laid flat on his back and cracked one eye open to check the time. Then he rolled out of bed, careful not to tumble over the edge, sighing dramatically -it wouldn’t be the first time. _Still_ not looking towards his night stand as he made his way to the washroom, he needed to make sense of things before he confirmed his suspicions.

 

On the bright side, the feeling of being late, which he’d woken up with was thankfully just _that_. A feeling.

 

He finished buttoning up his white shirt with the thin baby-blue vertical strips. He liked this shirt, it was a graduation gift from his mother and he only ever wore it on special occasions. Although, he was well aware that today was nothing special, he wore it, regardless. Using the fact that it was the first thing he’d grabbed on autopilot, as his excuse.

Mentally, he became preoccupied with retracing the events from yesterday, which led to the thing on his night stand. How did it get there?

Showered, dressed and still deep in thought, -he even managed to style his hair, somehow- he walked back to his room.

 

Sitting on his made bed, he stared at the object, unblinking. Just to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating or imagining it there. Wonwoo was completely certain he hadn’t put it there, he’d turned his office upside down yesterday looking for the damned thing but had no luck.

 

He’d searched in his bag and generally everywhere that it _could_ be, there was no way he’d left it here yesterday. He usually kept it either in his bag or his coat pocket, so this wasn’t his doing. But it also didn’t do _it_ self, so he mentally compiled a short list of possible doers.

 

Either, a fucking crazed demonic spirit.

In which case he’d have to move out ASAP, or the more logical option,

 

_Kim Mingyu._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thumbs caressing the smooth leather, he exhaled loudly. Thundering heart stalling, as a pensive expression painted his face, furrowing his features.

He honestly didn’t know which of the two was worse at this point, the younger boy was always doing crazy shit and the effect he had on Wonwoo was bordering on black magic and sorcery, maybe he _was_ the demon.

 

Rationally speaking though, why would Mingyu go through with something like this, stealing his wallet just to pay for an overpriced phone. He couldn’t figure out what the younger was getting out of doing this, what was in it for him?

Wonwoo didn’t even know what he was feeling right now, but confusion, uncertainty and a hint of fear were definitely part of the mix. Despite that, he felt relatively calm, not like he was about to burst a vein at any point, which scared him more than anything. Because shouldn’t he be going mad with rage right now.

He glared at the brown wallet, slowly opening it and confirming its contents, his cards, small family photos, little bit of cash and even that Starbucks coupon that he never used, (because he hated coffee) were all there. Everything in its original place, as if it hadn’t even been opened.

Welp, there goes his theory that _maybe_ he got robbed, but the robber had a sudden change of heart and returned it somehow. He groaned out loud, fingers massaging his temples, then he shot up on impulse, the wallet in his tight clasp as he walked into the living area.

The demon was lounging around on the sofa, not a care in the world as he flicked through random channels,

 

‘Kim Mingyu.’ The name was dripping with venom, despite that though, the younger boy turned to him, fluffy haired and face glowing with a cheery smile. Wonwoo’s expression faltered, Mingyu looked so angelic in the early morning light, that he momentarily forgot about his true identity as a demonic entity. His tone was chirpy as he spoke, ‘Oh, you found it.’

He had the audacity to point at the wallet, his face lighting up with ill-concealed amusement.

The bastard. _Nothing_ about this situation was funny. _Nothing_.

Wonwoo was torn between ripping his own hair out in frustration or ripping Mingyu’s. In the end he decided that ripping hair probably wasn’t the best way to sort this issue. He clenched his jaw, stomping over to a thoroughly entertained Mingyu, he was feeling quite enraged by this point. Maybe he’d spoken too soon. He _definitely_ felt like popping a vein now.

 

Taking a deep breath, he got straight down to business, no sense in beating around the bush, ‘As if I fucking found it. You and I both know how it got there. Why’d you do it?’

His voice was deceptively calm, contrasting with the storm that raged within him.

Mingyu was taken aback, but only for a millisecond, because almost immediately he’d leaned his elbows on the armrest, cupping his own face in his tanned palms. Smiling up through his long lashes, at a discombobulated Wonwoo,

‘Do what?’ The younger boy oozed confidence and sex appeal and he was hardly doing anything. A single flutter of lashes and Wonwoo lost it, red hot anger pumping in unhealthy quantities through his body.

 

‘YOU STOLE MY FUCKING WALLET, JUST TO PAY FOR AN OVERPRICED PHONE. THATS FUCKING WHAT!’ He had half a mind to check the pulsating vein in his neck, did it pop?

 

‘Babe, calm down. It’s not what you think.’ Although, he sounded marginally sober, it was still very obvious that he wasn’t taking him seriously. He launched the wallet at him, with the intention of bruising that perfect face of his. But the younger caught it with ease and lightening reflexes, Wonwoo would’ve gaped in shock, if he weren’t so angry.

He huffed in pure irritation, ‘Oh really? EXPLAIN THEN, you fucking dipshit.’

 

‘Sit down first.’ He pacified, tone gentle and coaxing as he patted the space beside him.

Wonwoo’s scowl deepened, fiery gaze clashing with Mingyu’s noticeably cooler one. He clenched his fists as hot blood rushed in his veins, he saw red. ‘No. I don’t wanna be anywhere near you, right now.’

 

‘Babe, I’m sorry Okay. I promise it’s not as bad as you think.’ Wonwoo took a step backwards, keeping his hands firmly clasped behind his back when Mingyu made a move to grab it. ‘Baby please.’ the younger sighed, brown eyes pleading with him as he stood up and Wonwoo turned his back to him. Now you feel bad? He scoffed internally.

 

‘I can explain.’ Puffs of hot air hit the side of his neck and muscular arms snaked around his middle.

Oh no, he wouldn’t last a second if they stayed like this. He steeled himself, successfully breaking free of the embrace in one try and facing the younger with his unwavering gaze. Surprised himself, at how easy that was, probably more so due to the fact that it was unexpected, rather than him actually possessing any form of commendable strength.

‘Don’t. Fucking TOUCH ME... talk like a normal human, why the fuck did you pull that shit yesterday?’ He crossed his arms, mentally praising himself for having enough self-control to push him away.

 

Mingyu let out a small groan, rubbing his own face and frowning as he mumbled, ‘I didn’t even do anything...’ Wonwoo heard it, ‘What the fuck was that?’

 

‘You heard me. I did nothing, nothing at all... so I won’t tell you anything, until you stop being mad at me first’

 

The older boy scoffed in disbelief, barely spitting his next words through gritted teeth, ‘I’m not mad. Talk.’ Wonwoo hoped all this jaw clenching to restrain his anger wasn’t damaging his teeth. He’d be _really_ angry if that was the case.

 

‘Why’s your neck vein about to pop then.’ Mingyu mirrored his actions, crossing his arms. Wonwoo was certain he didn’t look half as hot as the younger, even though they were doing the same thing.

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo sighed, fight draining from his body, this was getting ridiculous and he didn’t have the energy to maintain being so high strung. ‘I’m not mad.’ _He was_ , but he wanted it over and done with, so he lied.

 

‘Can I get a hug then?’ the cheeky tone nearly had him screaming out in frustration and the younger’s fluttering lashes gave him the sudden urge to pluck them out, one by one, using nothing, but his bare hands.

“NO, you cannot. You fucking wallet thief.” The reply was on the tip of his tongue and he bit it back, instead opening his arms and gesturing for Mingyu to come in.

He hated how his body melted into the younger’s the moment they touched, hated the way he made him forget his anger and frustration as he gently brushed his fingers through his combed hair.

Absolutely _despised_ the effect Mingyu had on him, but it was a fact he couldn’t change.

One he didn’t even _want_ to change, actually.

 

‘How did the wallet disappear when I needed it, then magically materialise out of nowhere on my nightstand this morning?’ He asked, tone painted with disdain and sarcasm in ample amounts.

 

‘You dropped it as you got in the car. I saw, but I didn’t do anything I swear.’ Wait, what? He dropped it in the car. Well that made fucking sense, why did this kid always make sense in the end.

Now, he was speechless, he had a lot to say but the words dodged his brain. So they continued to hug in silence, the hand that wasn’t in his hair, rubbing soothing circles on his back.

 

Then he found the words and some fight returned to his voice,

 

‘You didn’t do anyth- do you not realise that’s the fucking problem. If you saw it, you should’ve fucking told me.’ He pulled away from the hug, poking the younger’s chest.

 

He was tugged back into the solid chest again, 

‘Hyung?... remember when you called me from Soonyoung’s phone on Sunday?’

‘Yes...’ the younger was still at the seminar then, but why was he asking?

‘You asked me to buy you a new phone...’

 

‘Oh my fucking god, Mingyu... that was a JOKE.’ Wonwoo pulled away completely this time, head reeling in disbelief, as he covered his face in his hands.

Mingyu held onto his wrists, gently exposing Wonwoo’s red face. Next, he intertwined all their hands together, smiling softly while Wonwoo huffed in frustration.

‘I _know_ that was a joke. But you put the idea into my head and I wanted to do it for you. So, when you dropped your wallet, I thought it was me getting lucky and I didn’t wanna tell you... it’s not my fault that you didn’t see it, nor is it my fault that I saw it. Don’t blame me for that, just accept it.’

He rolled his eyes, it might’ve made sense, but he was still salty. How could he accept such an expensive gift without feeling guilty? He couldn’t. He sighed, detangling their fingers and walking away to the kitchen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mingyu must’ve followed him there at some point, because he appeared out of thin air, all smiley and puppy-like. Or maybe Wonwoo was too focused on his breakfast and too much in his head to notice. He scowled, leaning away as his line of vision filled with the younger.

 

‘Hyung, try it with this.’

Wonwoo looked from the item in Mingyu’s palm to the boy’s face, the scowl deepening, ‘I’m not putting cheese in my cereal, Gyu.’

‘I promise it’s good.’ He looked sceptically back and forth, but he started to feel ill just by the thought of it, so he shook his head aggressively. ‘I’ll pass. Thanks.’

‘You’re missing out.’ The younger shrugged, as he folded the cheese slice in half and threw it in his mouth. Chewing and swallowing the whole thing in one bite. Wonwoo gaped with his mouth wide open, literally.

 

‘What? Want me to feed you?’ Mingyu leaned closer, murmuring the suggestion by his ear,

‘N-no, go away... I’m not accepting the phone as a gift either. I can’t.’ He focused his attention back on his food, deliberately stuffing his mouth with more than he can chew, just to avoid conversation.

 

Mingyu clearly didn’t get the memo, ‘why not? It’s my money, if I wanna spend it all on you, I will.’

Wonwoo’s heart fluttered so much, it literally grew wings and threatened to fly away.

 

He bit his lower lip, unable to hold back the bashful smile and blossoming blush, Mingyu leaned in impossibly closer and Wonwoo blinked furiously, almost cross-eyed.

‘W-what?’

 

‘Nothing... just that you’re such-‘ The younger cut himself off when his lips decided they’d rather be aggressively smooching Wonwoo’s cheeks than talk. ‘A cutie.’

He rubbed his cheek, face blazing. Then he remembered something, swiftly changing the subject and distracting the younger, he asked in a small voice, afraid it might crack if he spoke any louder. ‘What time did we get home last night?’

 

‘Almost midnight. Why?’

Wonwoo internally sighed, relieved that it worked as Mingyu leaned back slightly, head tilting with a questioning tone as he told him.

‘I couldn’t remember.’ He mumbled honestly, tracing invisible patterns on the stone countertop.

‘Of course, you wouldn’t. Sleepy head.’

Mingyu pinched his abused cheek and Wonwoo pulled painfully at the younger’s hair, maybe he should’ve ripped it out earlier.

 

‘AH, AH AH!’ The younger complained loudly, freeing his hair and grabbing both of Wonwoo’s wrists in one hand, in a blindligly swift motion. Expression darkened, as he intruded on the elder’s breathing space. Wonwoo tried to tug his wrists free, but Mingyu wasn’t messing around this time, firm clasp on the thin wrists, there was no hope for escape.

He didn’t like where this was going and apparently, he had every reason to.

 

Because right then, Mingyu pecked the same abused cheek again and Wonwoo’s eyes widened hysterically, he whipped his head to the other side and Mingyu smooched that cheek as well. He squirmed, a spine-tingling shiver wracking through his mind and body as he looked down, all the while fighting to free his hands.

He heard Mingyu’s chuckles from directly above him, puffs of air hitting the crown of his head as he laughed, then a pair of soft lips in the same place.

Words just wouldn’t form in his caramelised brain and he whined, burying his head in Mingyu’s chest, the latter spoke again after some more chuckling, what the fuck was so funny anyway?

 

‘You fell asleep at the park. I don’t know how you managed that, it was freezing cold.’ He was glad he still had his head down, because the blush grew a few shades darker. Wonwoo knew _exactly_ how he managed to sleep so soundly in sub-zero temperatures. It began with an “M” and ended with an “ingyu”, but he couldn’t say that out loud, so instead he groaned, asking, ‘Did you carry me?’

‘Yes. Just to the car and on the elevator, though.’

Wonwoo looked up then, ‘Thank you.’ He allowed the sincerity to drip off his tone and emanate from his eyes, Mingyu blinked at him, then his pupils darted around the kitchen, avoiding his gaze.

‘You don’t need to.’ Was he flustered? He’d have to thank him more often, if that was the case.

 

‘Awww, but I’m heavy as fuck and you didn’t have to’ he knew he was just teasing now, slowly removing his wrists from Mingyu’s loosened grip and chasing his eyes.

‘Was I meant to leave my baby in the cold, alone and vulnerable?’ Something flashed in the younger’s eyes, it was a lightning quick shift, gone as soon as he realised something was there. But it left him feeling hot and bothered as yet another shiver ran down his spine, filling him with a deliciously mind-numbing sensation all the way from the hairs at the top of his head to the tips of his toes.

 

He groaned involuntary, standing up to hug the younger boy. Strong emotions of embarrassment, gratefulness, happiness, helplessness and pure admiration, mingling together and confusing the living daylights out of him. Why was Mingyu so good at pushing all his buttons?

‘You could’ve simply woken me up, like a normal human.’ Tone playful, as he tugged at a fistful of the younger’s soft strands with the final word and Mingyu laughed, ‘Are you calling me abnormal?’

 

Wonwoo’s grin widened as he realised Mingyu was quoting one of their text conversations, ‘isn’t that synonymous with Kim Mingyu and stupid.’

Mingyu pulled away, appraising him at an arm’s length, then he smirked, cocking an eyebrow, ‘Wow, so you remember that… Yet you don’t remember more important things.’

The hands on his shoulders began slowly snaking down his back, drawing him in, so that their faces were way too close for comfort. Thankfully Wonwoo didn’t notice, or he’d be dying in embarrassment. Instead his eyebrows furrowed, and lips pursed in thought, as the words “more important things” rampaged through his head.

 

His breath hitched, as he fixed Mingyu with a wide-eyed gaze, ‘Like what?... WAIT, was it your birthday recently?’

Mingyu rolled his eyes, it looked hilarious from this proximity, but Wonwoo was too worried about a possible missed birthday, to find the humour in that action.

‘Of course not, dumbass.’ The younger was smiling despite his death wish, Wonwoo raised his strong chin and his eyes narrowed into slits,

 

‘Call me a dumbass one more fucking time, and I promise they’ll drag your dead body out of here tomorrow.’ His threat was dark and laden with evil promise, he got pretty good at the whole threatening thing for survival reasons. You needed it if you interacted with a Kwon Soonyoung often enough. But Mingyu still looked relaxed and happy, biting his lip to hide his smile before he asked,

‘Tomorrow? So you’ll keep my dead body for a whole day?’ his tone was mocking and the threat didn’t seem to be working at all, but the shorter persisted.

‘Keep going and there’ll be no “body” to drag. Cuz I’ll burn you alive.’

 

The younger blinked, clearly shocked at the graphic description, ‘No Babe. I’d rather live... my birthday’s April 6th by the way. Mark your calendar.’

He said after a short pause and Wonwoo slouched in relief, he didn’t miss Mingyu’s birthday, good.

Then, he was deep in thought again, what is this “important thing” that he allegedly couldn’t remember,

‘What is it then?’ he gave up on thinking and just asked. Genuine curiosity painted his tone, coupled with a head tilt and a small frown, Wonwoo didn’t even realise he was doing that.

 

‘You’re so cute.’ Mingyu groaned, throwing his head back and the shorter flinched, not expecting the volume or the words,

‘Are you trying to make sense, or can I just ignore your bullshit?’ Wonwoo was blushing despite his own harsh words and Mingyu invited his warm palms to squish the blazing cheeks. Would he get wrinkles? Or acne? Did he even want to stop him, when he was loving the attention?

 

‘Why’re you asking me for permission?’ Good question. He was getting more well-mannered and less like his brash self, a sign that he was enjoying himself a bit too much in the younger’s arms. He quickly redeemed himself with a question of his own.

 

‘Why does your breath stink like cheese?’ Mingyu pouted, pink lips glistening and enticingly soft, he had the cute act done perfectly, even down to the slight wobble of his chin. Wonwoo wanted to kiss him, then the younger’s eyes lit up with mischief and he opened wide, breathing all over his face. His face scrunched in disgust, the smell was quite pungent, he wasn’t the biggest fan of cheese, out of sheer necessity he forced himself into the younger’s body.

 

 

 

 

 

 

He couldn’t believe he was doing this, _again_. But it was real, and it worked. He’d voluntarily walked into Mingyu’s arms and nuzzled his flaming face into the younger’s neck. His reasoning, cheesy breath stank and simply that if Mingyu could do similar affectionate things to him, then he could as well. Also, because he couldn’t face him with a face this red, not yet.

‘Stop calling me that, I’m neither cute nor a baby’ the whinging tone, was entirely unintentional, but it couldn’t be undone so he grimaced in pain.

 

‘Baby...’ the younger singsong-ed against his ear, soft lips on his hot skin. He could tell Mingyu was back to teasing him again, but his mind was clouded with vividly inappropriate thoughts and he clenched his eyes shut. Grip tightening on the material of Mingyu’s shirt from the back, as the younger’s arms pressed him closer and closer, by this point not even a single hair strand could squeeze between their bodies. He was sure even air couldn’t flow through the non-existent gap, they were that suffocating-ly close.

 

‘Grown men don’t fall asleep at a public park, when it’s minus 5 degrees. Especially, when they’re getting their hair stroked.’ Mingyu began stroking his hair, probably to prove his point, but Wonwoo had no intentions of denying it, seeing as he never attempted to hide it in the first place.

He had a good point. An embarrassingly indecent moan escaped his lips and he blushed crimson. Wonwoo found that he was blushing a lot today and the day has barely even begun yet.

 

‘You like getting your hair played with, Don’t you?’ Mingyu sounded dazed, like he’d just gotten off a rollercoaster and lost his sense of direction, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice that didn’t go undetected by the older.

He sighed, mumbling against Mingyu’s strong neck, ‘It’s a habit, Gyu. Don’t tease me about that.’

‘That’s an adorable habit, and you’re a cute baby squishy.’ Wonwoo covered both his cheeks so fast, eyes widing in horror as he stepped away from the embrace. Mingyu didn’t even get the chance to do anything as Wonwoo ran out of there, knowing from experience, that the customary cheek abuse would soon follow such comments.

Fleeing for his life, he went about gathering all his things for work instead.

 

He heard the younger’s cackling from the kitchen and chose to tune out the soothing angelic sounds, in favour of pulling on his socks and shoes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The feeling of being incredibly late that he’d woken up to, might’ve been just a feeling earlier, but it was a lot more than just a feeling now, it was a fact. It didn’t even surprise him that he failed to regret his morning with Mingyu, he may have been burning with the desire to murder him a mere half an hour ago. Now, all he desired to do was keep him close, preferably all up in his personal space, he found that he liked that very much. 

So as Mingyu parted with him on the elevator, he naturally felt upset. Their final hand squeeze and silent eye contact in farewell, not quite what he’d wanted. It never even struck him that he was a tad over-dramatic, since they’d be together again in a few hours. He just wanted him close, always.

 

 

The next thought crashed into his conscious like a train wreck and his brain stumbled in shock at the resolve.

If he wanted Mingyu, he’d have to do something about it. Preferably sooner, rather than later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently basically dying over their comeback & that one THANKS fancam where meanie are wearing leather jackets aghsfajdgnvgsabalksj
> 
>  
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do much on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to talk to you guys <3
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	32. Chapter 32

The sun was shining, blinding in its level of brightness that lit up the world through the unstained ceiling to floor glass. Wonwoo was almost blinded by it as he squinted far beyond the glass, to the sparkling azure horizon. The world outside the windows was uncharacteristically bright today, small fluffs of sporadic clouds occasionally travelling past. But unlike their thick, dark-grey counterparts, these seemed innocent and well-boding.

It was probably still cold outside though. Early January weather, albeit snowless for the most part was just as brutally remorseless in its depleting temperatures as the former month. Wonwoo didn’t mind the cold that much, he preferred it to the scorching heat of the summer months and the relentless boredom that came with it. But even _that_ would be better than being stuck in this seemingly endless meeting, the constant drone of dull voices, about even duller topics was almost unbearable. He tapped his feet impatiently, he couldn’t wait for this to be over.

 

Sadly, Mingyu hadn’t been part of these regular meetings since the first one, as their departments hardly had any overlaps that required them to attend the same meetings. And as such, he’d been forced to brave the last few alone, surviving for the most part but finding it incredibly difficult to stay focused beyond the 20 minutes mark.

 

 

The booming voice of his boss cut through his daydreams,

‘Right gentlemen and ladies, that concludes today’s meeting. Some good work from you all, keep it up. And Wonwoo...’

 

He startled, almost choking on his own saliva, ‘Yes sir?’

 

‘Can I have a quick word? In my office, if you please.’ Wonwoo nodded and stayed back as the other employees left the room, Junhui threw him a strange glance and he glared back. What the hell was he looking at?

Just as he gathered his things and began to follow Joshua to his office, he suddenly felt nervous. Was this about the 50th anniversary presentation? Did he not like his idea? Or did he change his mind and want someone else to do it? He was so much in his own head, that he hadn’t realised Joshua stopped walking, barely avoiding a likely awkward collision with the shorter man.

 

‘Wonwoo, is everything good?’

He looked up, stunned and stuttering, ‘Yes, everything’s great.’ The knuckles around his file, turned pale with the force of his grip and his smile was anything but natural. Joshua seemed convinced though, either that or he just didn’t care.

The older boy simply smiled, soft and sweet as he invited him in and sauntered to his seat. Crossing his legs and keeping his back straight, while he sipped on some water.

Wonwoo couldn’t relate, he was always slouching and couldn’t remember the last time he’d sat so proper.

Carefully lowering himself on the opposite armchair, he waited for his boss to speak.

 

‘So Jeon Wonwoo... how’re you finding the new position?’ Arms crossed over his immaculate suit, he spoke in a curious tone.

 

‘It’s good.’ It took him three seconds of intense staring for him to realise how dumb his answer was. Clearly Joshua was looking for more specific, detailed answers. Mentally face-palming, he opened his mouth to correct himself but the gentle voice that spoke up next wasn’t his. His eyes refocused on Joshua,

‘The reason I’m asking. I assume you wish to know...’ Wonwoo nodded, ‘Well, I got your presentation draft yesterday, your department has had one of the worst few days, workload wise. Yet you managed to submit everything on time, if not early. It’s never happened with the editorial team before. I have reason to believe you might be over exerting yourself. I hope you aren’t?’

It was true that he’d submitted a draft, fully aware that the deadline was months away. But this was important, and he figured some preliminary feedback wouldn’t hurt. Maybe he’d rushed it and the quality wasn’t good enough. He cleared his throat, anxiety bubbling in his chest, ‘Is the quality low? Is that why you think I’m overexerting?’

‘No. On the contrary, actually the work you’ve submitted is polished almost to perfection, I can’t fault it. It’s just that we’ve never had this level of productivity in that department. You could say it, caught my eye.’

 

‘Oh.’ Wonwoo knew how to fight people but he had no idea how to accept compliments and his face began to warm up as he lowered his gaze.

He was counting down the seconds, stringing together a coherent sentence to convey his gratitude and let his kind boss know that he was fine.

 

Three.

 

Two.

 

One.

 

Wonwoo took a deep breath, ‘I’m happy the wor-’

His sentence was cut short when the office door opened, and confident footsteps strolled in, halting just before the armchair which he occupied. Joshua rolled his eyes with a sweet smile,

‘Mingyu, how many times now? Knock before you enter.’

 

Mingyu? His Mingyu? He shook his head, keeping it low as he placed the file over his face. Obstructing himself from view, he didn’t know why, but his natural reaction was to hide.

‘Sorry sorry, I just need you to confirm this again.’

Yup. That was definitely his Mingyu. He’d recognise his distinct tone and drawl anywhere, he kept himself concealed and closed his eyes.

 

‘What happened to the one I signed from this morning?’

‘Spilt coffee all over it.’ Mingyu’s sheepish tone, had him biting back a smile, cute.

‘You’re so clumsy sometimes, and drink water not coffee... Don’t you sleep well at your new place?’ Wonwoo frowned at the way his boss was fussing over his crush. Almost like a mum would over her child, it reminded him of his relationship with Jeonghan and he suddenly missed the boy.

The older had been so busy with wedding preparations, that they’d hardly had any time to keep in touch, he’d have to call him soon. Right now though, Mingyu was speaking so he halted the thought, filing it for later use,

 

‘I think I _do_?’ His tone rose at the end, making it sound more like a question than a statement. Did the younger have a hard time sleeping at their apartment. Wonwoo frowned, he had no idea.

‘You don’t sound too sure... Here.’ It sounded like a paper of some sort was being handed between them, then Mingyu spoke again,

‘Thanks... I just slept late last night and woke up earlier than usual for the gym.’

‘Are you trying to be the hulk or something?’ Wonwoo swallowed, mouth dry as he listened in. He knew why Mingyu slept late, from the stupid night picnic, to carrying his sleepy ass home, of course he’d be tired.

But he’d also always wondered how the younger had time to work out, so it made sense that he woke up early. This explained how he was always up and ready, even before Wonwoo returned from the depths of sleep. He blinked, carefully tuning into the conversation,

 

‘I like working out hyung, helps me destress.’

Joshua laughed, there was a thudding sound, like someone getting hit, ‘What’s stressing you out so much these days?’

Mingyu sighed dramatically, he imagined him running his tanned fingers through his hair in frustration, even though he couldn’t see it. ‘I can’t stop thinking, should I just tell him everything, hyung?’

 

‘Do you have any lunch plans?’ Wonwoo scowled in confusion, Joshua’s tone sounded frantic and rushed all of a sudden, what was that all about?

Before he could think further, a shadow fell over him and a familiar hand lowered the file from his face using a tanned index finger.

They locked gazes and Wonwoo’s robotic smile was back, ‘Hi.’ He blurted on autopilot.

 

Mingyu ruffled his hair and tugged his earlobe playfully, ‘Hi? You’re only saying that now? Really Wonwoo?’ The younger shook his head in disbelief as the older looked everywhere but at him, shrugging in reply.

The tall boy looked back to Joshua and the younger’s sharp jawline had him thinking less than appropriate things, he wanted to cut himself on it.

‘Hyung? Are you done with him? …We’re having lunch together.’ He watched the bobbing motion of his Adam’s apple as he spoke and the muscles in his face as they tensed and relaxed, then he was smiling again and Wonwoo found himself smiling back dumbly. Until a call of his name grabbed the attention of his disoriented mind.

‘Oh sure. And Wonwoo, you’re doing great. Just make sure you’re not putting too much pressure on yourself.’ He took Mingyu’s offered hand and bowed his head slightly in thanks to his boss’s kind words.

‘Don’t worry hyung, I’ll look after him.’

Wonwoo glowed in embarrassment and Joshua giggled, shooing them away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Outside the office, Wonwoo tugged at their joined hands and Mingyu turned to him, ‘Yes babe?’

 

His eyes widened at the name, ‘Don’t. We’re at work.’ He blushed, whispering in mortification.

Mingyu raised a brow, tone sceptical, ‘So holding hands is fine but calling you “babe” isn’t?’ His eyes twinkled with humour as he bit back a grin,

Wonwoo fought not to blush harder, he made a fair point, but nodded his head anyway.

 

‘I fail to see the logic in that. What are we even hiding?’

 

 _That_ hurt. Of course, “they” weren’t hiding anything. Wonwoo was hiding a crush on him and Mingyu apparently had one of his own on someone else.

So, he failed to understand why Mingyu initiated any of their skin-ship moments. Still, he wasn’t one to deny free candy and Mingyu was the best kind, yet at this moment, he felt too salty to continue their handholding as he ripped his out, folding his arms over the file.

‘Stop being weird.’ He hissed at him, looking forward at the steel elevator doors.

 

He heard the younger huff, ‘You started it.’ Suddenly, the thought that Mingyu had someone who was allowed to hold and kiss him, made him feel incredible resentment and his mood turned very sour.

‘Stop whinging, bitch.’ Wonwoo spat with ill-directed venom, he made a mental note to avoid thoughts involving that “asshole”.

 

The taller boy was behind him in a flash, arms around him in a tight back-hug. He blanched and tried to shrug him off,

‘Mingyu, what the fuck? We’re in public... Don’t.’

‘Shut up.’ 

‘Did you just tell me to shu-’ the younger clamped his hand over Wonwoo’s mouth, so he _had_ no choice but to shut up.

He rolled his eyes, hoping no one would see them like this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The rest of his day passed by uneventfully, and he drowned himself in a pool of work after a quick lunch, which surprisingly kept him fairly focused and extremely busy. So much so, that Mingyu had enough of waiting around aimlessly and came to pick him up, a whole two hours after they were meant to finish.

He hadn’t noticed the time, but he definitely felt how tired he was as a result of his unceasing exertion. As an apology, he allowed the younger to hold his hand, while they walked to the car. The younger was busy ranting about puppies and the adverse effects of deforestation, but honestly Wonwoo had no clue.

He was fighting to keep his eyes open and focusing on putting one foot in front of the other as Mingyu dragged him along.

 

He fell in bed that night and slept like a corpse, barely managing to change clothes and opting to completely skip anything hygiene related. Because when Wonwoo wanted sleep, that’s what he did.

Maybe _over_ did slightly, as he’d woken up rather drowsy and pretty late the next morning. Missing his five alarms and almost dropping the phone in shock at the time, thankfully it landed on his bed. And he would’ve left it there too, if it wasn’t for Mingyu’s casual reminder by the door,

‘Hyung, got everything?’ the younger blinked at him as he called the elevator to their floor,

Wonwoo nodded his head absently,

‘Ye-’ he paused, eyes widening as he ran back inside, not even taking his shoes off.

Mingyu’s laughter in the background the perfect backdrop to his tragic morning, he could only hope it got better.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was meant to be up yesterday, but I was super stuck with writing for some reason. Tomorrow's chapter will be uploaded on time, since it's ready now as well. Sorry about the delay & I hope you like <3
> 
>  
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do much on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to meet you guys :D
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	33. Chapter 33

After the less than perfect start to his day, he compiled a short to-do-list, partly to feel better about himself but also because there was a lot that needed to be done. Hopefully, it would allow him to focus on one thing at a time and keep his thoughts organised.

 

**Shit that needs to be done by 11:59pm on Wednesday 3rd Jan 2018:**

  1. **Proofread articles.**
  2. **Authorise orders.**
  3. **Amend & analyse various documents.**
  4. **Get back to HR about last week’s meeting.**
  5. **Have lunch with Mingyu.**
  6. **Try to be calm and professional around him.**
  7. **Don’t allow him to kiss/pinch my cheeks.**
  8. **DON’T let my crush show.**
  9. **REMEMBER to go to Jihoon’s studio.**
  10. **Re-edit the presentation.**



 

Cracking his neck, he saved the list in his notes and kept it in the dock at the bottom of his screen, for later reference. Satisfied with the points, he got straight to work, ticking them off as he went along.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Stretching dramatically in his seat, he yawned and blinked blearily at the bright screen. It was now 18:55pm, a small smile appeared on his pale face, he’d managed to complete most of the tasks successfully and he was very proud of himself for that. Although, he failed at 7 and wasn’t completely satisfied with 10. But he’d tried his best and he’d done so much already, so he didn’t exactly feel the need to be harsh on himself.

He switched off the computer and grabbed his things, not bothering to wear any of it as he took the stairs up to Mingyu’s office. An unintentional smile pulling at the corners of his lips, at the thought.

 

He walked in, forgoing the knocking and similar formalities, he just needed to tell him not to wait up, since he’d be going to the studio. It would take a minute at most, so he didn’t see the point in doing anything elaborate. Granted, he could’ve simply sent him a message, but they were literally in the same building and he might’ve wanted to see his beautiful bronzed face one last time before he left. Could he really be blamed?

 

‘Mingyu, I’m going to my friend’s studio. He wants me to help with some lyrics.’ He informed from the doorway, watching as the younger typed away busily on his computer. He was beginning to doubt whether Mingyu even heard him, but then he finally replied,

‘Jihoon?’ The younger hummed absently, Wonwoo found it a tad strange that he knew the “friend” he was referring to. With that being said, it was possible that he may have told him at some point, so he didn’t think much of it. He nodded his head, slightly sceptical as Mingyu finally looked up from his screen, radiant smile in place.

‘Come in. Close the door.’ Wonwoo’s heart skipped a beat, naturally. Mingyu was just so effortlessly in control of his heart like that, he didn’t even know it.

 

‘I need to leave. I only came to tell you that I don’t need you to be my chauffeur tonight. You’re free.’ Unbeknownst to him, he’d ended up doing exactly as he was told. He was in, the door was closed, his coat and scarf carelessly dropped on the sofa. Then he was standing in front of Mingyu’s desk, it didn’t look like he was in any hurry to get somewhere at all, actions completely contradicting his own words.

‘I don’t wanna be free, though…’ The younger boy whined, then he looked up at him with a serious expression. ‘I’ll drop you off there.’

Mingyu shot up from his seat and was walking past him, when the shorter boy impulsively grabbed his arm, ‘You don’t have to.’ Wonwoo rushed to decline, he seemed busy and he felt guilty about always receiving from him, he felt ungrateful.

The younger briefly glanced to their hands, squeezing gently, ‘I want to.’

Wonwoo shied away from the intense gaze, heart raging, ‘Let me rephrase, it’s not up for discussion. I’m going alone.’

 

Mingyu took a step closer to him, almost cooing in his ear, ‘but it’s so cold outside…’

Wonwoo shuddered involuntarily, ‘You’re not taking me there, Mingyu.’ He tried to sound stern, but his resolve shattered the moment their eyes connected, he wasn’t even sure what he’d been saying.

‘I am.’ The conviction in the younger’s tone was reinforced by the steely resolve in his darkened eyes, like he genuinely wanted to take him there. The sight warmed his heart and he felt soft, so he rebelled in the only way he knew how when he felt emotionally attacked like this,

 

He whined, pouting at the floor and firmly stomping his foot, ‘Nooo, you’re always doing things for me. It’s not fair.’

Mingyu cooed, cradling his cheeks gently in his warm palms and squishing the heated flesh, ‘Baby, it’s okay. You do things for me too.’

‘Like? I dare you to name one.’ Wonwoo’s voice came out all weird and his words were barely intelligible, as he allowed the younger to mess with his cheeks. Yup, he’d definitely failed at 7, strangely though, he didn’t even feel like stopping him.

 

The taller chuckled, humming in thought as he let go of his cheeks.

Instead, pulling him closer by the waist with one hand and ruffling his hair with the other. ‘Well, you always do the cleaning...’ the shorter scowled, probing Mingyu’s hard back, where he kept his arms secured around his middle, feeling the grooves and bumps of the muscles every time he moved.

‘Don’t lie to my face. It’s not always.’ He mumbled petulantly.

The taller boy pulled him even closer, kissing his cheek. Wonwoo’s reaction was a whole second too late, he was starting to get used to this affectionate treatment. But he realised he should at least act like he wasn’t enjoying it, so he wiped at his cheek, concealing his smile with a disgusted expression.

Mingyu chuckled at his reaction, eyes twinkling with amusement as he nuzzled his cheek briefly, before speaking, ‘Okay, but you... ummm. You’re right, you don’t do much.’ He finished, genuine and serious, as if he’d only just realised it himself.

 

‘Bitch.’ Wonwoo’s tone sounded just as offended as he felt, he really thought Mingyu would’ve said something sweet and cringe worthy as he always did, but that was just plain rude. He wanted to hit him.

‘But hey, at least you’re cute, right?’ Wonwoo was convinced this guy wasn’t human.

How else would he know he’d planned to hit him right then, hands snaked slowly down his arms, to grab his wrists as he spoke. Well there goes his plan of hitting him, he settled for glaring instead.

‘I hate you.’ There was no real bite to the words, every last atom in his body refuting the idea.

 

‘You don’t... Remember that time you said you liked me?’ The younger leaned into him, wiggling his perfect brows. He wrenched his gaze away, feeling disoriented as his merry heart sung of pecks on cheeks and late-night picnics. His face coloured despite himself and he bit his lip.

‘I don’t recall.’ He lied through his teeth, vividly recalling their late-night phone call from weeks ago.

‘You don’t seem to recall any of the important stuff.’ Mingyu murmured closely, lips grazing his ear as he sighed. His eyes fluttered shut, full body shivers barely kept under control as the events from yesterday morning flashed in his mind.

‘Your birthday’s on the something of April.’ He blurted on a whim, finally opening his eyes and accidentally brushing lips with Mingyu, he stumbled back.

Fingers flying to his tingling lips, eyes wide in pure shock and horror. It was clearly an accident, but did that qualify as a kiss? Did he just kiss Kim Mingyu? Fuck.

Somehow, he’d gotten the feeling they’ve been that close before. But they’d shared a lot of questionable moments, so he chose to file it away for now and explore at a later time.

Thankfully, Mingyu walked back to his desk and fell in the office chair, rocking lightly from side to side as he fixed his intense stare on him, ‘The “something of April”? I literally told you yesterday morning, you forget already?’

‘6th.’ He blurted, swallowing the emotion down and drowning out his loud thoughts.

 

‘Thank god, I was about to disown you just now.’

Wonwoo sighed in relief after hearing the younger’s answer, partly because he couldn’t remember whether it was the 6th or 16th for some odd reason. But also, because Mingyu wasn’t addressing the lip-brush incident, and for that, he was grateful.

‘You’d have to own me first.’ His post-relieved brain was too lax to catch that one before it escaped. He held his breath, would Mingyu play along?

 

‘I already own you.’ His shoulders deflated, tension seeping away, Mingyu was obviously just messing around with him. That fact didn’t stop him from fighting back, he wasn’t about to lose this, he bit back a grin,

‘Bullshit. You’re literally like my slave, always doing things for me…’ He turned his head away, the truth behind his words hitting him full force. He blinked rapidly, eyes roaming around the dark walls and interesting choice of paintings, to distract the sudden flood of sentimental thoughts.

Abstract in nature yet surreal in appearance, the colours were vibrant and layered beautifully without mixing. He felt like it all had a meaning, but his knowledge of art reached its limit and stopped at identifying different shades of colour and knowing what looks good and what doesn’t.

Scanning around the paintings in Mingyu’s office, his eyes were very much pleased. A hum of appreciation escaped through his lips and he cleared his throat,

‘I’m giving you the rest of the evening off. Have fun without your master.’ He said, when he felt sufficiently put together and not like he’d start crying.

Then he refocused his attention back on the main art piece, the most beautifully complicated one in the room and he felt slightly faint at the combination of deadly visuals and even deadlier words. ‘But I can’t live without you, babe.’

 

Inside he was dying, the beating of his heart too loud in his own ears, he hoped it wasn’t obvious, ‘Stop being fucking dramatic, it’s just a few hours... talk to your crush or some shit.’

His words came as a surprise to both himself and a gaping Mingyu, it was amazing the crap his brain forced out when he wasn’t paying attention.

 

‘M-my what?’ His voice sounded strained, stressed, as if scared, but what of?

‘That guy you keep talking about. The asshole drunk.’ Wonwoo deadpanned, the thought of him, left a bitter taste on his tongue and he scowled. Whoever he was, Wonwoo really disliked him.

Mingyu had the audacity to roll his eyes, ‘I can’t. He’s busy and doesn’t want me around.’

 

‘See, told you he’s an asshole.’ How dare he reject such an adorable puppy? Was he even sane?

Highly unlikely. Wonwoo answered himself in his own head, because here Mingyu was in “love” with some asshole who didn’t even want to hang out with him.

Wonwoo would do anything to be in that guy’s place, he’d never deny Mingyu of being close to him.

 

The younger’s next comment startled him, ‘You’d know, it takes one to know one.’

Did Mingyu just indirectly call him an asshole? The little bitch,

‘You’re a bitch, maybe that’s why you like an asshole.’ The words were spat harshly, before he could organise his thoughts and he simply shrugged at the younger’s horrified expression.

 

Mingyu groaned in mock pain, ‘Just leave, already. You’re killing me.’ He dramatically clenched at his shirt, throwing his head back on his office chair.

‘Fine. See you at home.’ It was Wonwoo’s turn to roll his eyes, buttoning up his charcoal coat as he looked around for his scarf. He found the purple woolly thing peeking out from under the sofa and went to retrieve it.

 

Mingyu spoke, tone tentative and hopeful, ‘Can I at least pick you up?’

‘No.’ His answer was brisk, not even sparing a glance towards the younger as he looped the scarf around his neck.

Then he paused halfway through pulling his black sweater paws out, completely taken aback by the sincere tone, ‘I can’t sleep till you get home anyway, and it’s gonna be cold and late, I wanna bring you home, at least... just text me when you’re done, please?’ Combined with the heart-warming words and the gentle eyes of the younger, he sighed. Having no choice but to comply.

 

Biting the inside of his cheek, he thought for a whole three seconds before he huffed an answer,

‘Fine.’

Mingyu beamed, Wonwoo didn’t even know why he tried, the younger always got his way with him in the end.

But as he walked to the underground station, he couldn’t seem to regret any of it as his lips refused to stay together, stretching out over his teeth, instead.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The chill in the night air, had him shivering as he walked to Mingyu’s car, it was a few minutes before midnight, when he’d texted the younger to pick him up, as promised. He was speed walking out of the studio in shock, after sharing a rushed goodbye with his friends, because Mingyu had texted back, saying he was here, not even 10 minutes later.

They exchanged a short greeting, warm smiles and sweet words from Mingyu, which Wonwoo appreciated but couldn’t indulge in. Instead, he closed his eyes and sunk into the leather seat. Claiming that he was too tired to talk, which he was, but the real reason, had less to do with fatigue and more to do with his emotionally draining and confusing conversation with Soonyoung and Jihoon.

No matter what he did, he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about their words, especially Jihoon’s confident face when he told him to “have fun with it” and that “everything will be great in the end”. The words made no sense, not least because they were meant to advise him on his Mingyu dilemma, he’d even told them that Mingyu liked someone, yet Jihoon’s reply didn’t change.

 

Aside from the weird conversation, the rest of the evening was quite uneventful. Seeing his friends again and simply hanging out, was a welcome and very much missed sight. Laughing, joking and snacking on various less-than-healthy foods, brought back happy memories from his past.

The simple times _before_ Mingyu, when it was just the three of them, friends hanging out, without the cloud of angst hanging over them and the unrequited love, tainting the gathering.

The good old days, that were stress and heartache free.

 

Despite all that, Wonwoo wouldn’t change his love for Mingyu, nor would he trade it for anything or anyone else. Because as much as he caused him stress and heartache, Mingyu also gave him an immeasurable amount of happiness and his entire world was lighter, brighter and healthier, now that the younger was part of it. Therefore, he was certain that meeting Mingyu, would remain the best thing that had ever happened to him, regardless of what the future had in store.

They’d also had some progress with the lyrics and Wonwoo promised he’d try to write more of them throughout the week. But after their Mingyu talk, he lost inspiration and couldn’t focus on writing anymore. He just wanted to go home, hug Mingyu and sleep Jihoon’s cryptic words away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo was the first to step out of the lift on the 17th floor, the younger following closely behind him. His mind was still scattered, Jihoon’s calm expression and knowing smile, kept popping up in his head.

Captured by the deep thoughts, he’d miscalculated his steps and nearly tripped over a small mountain of clothes, yelping in surprise as he failed to notice them on his way to his room.

In a heart stopping moment, his foot hooked under the clothes and tangled, gravity tried to pull him lower and his arms flailed on instinct.

Miraculously, he survived, but that had less to do with his balancing skills and more so due to the fact that he was being held up by a strong arm around his middle.

 

‘Careful.’ The soft lips whispered the word against his ear, he groaned internally. Did he have to be _that_ close? Why was he trying to kill him?

 

‘What is this?’

‘Laundry.’ The younger sing-songed with an adorable tiny lisp, he failed to contain the next groan and pulled away from the younger’s embrace.

 

With a frown, he turned to him and sighed, ‘I know, idiot. I _meant_ why is it here and not in the basket, _again_?’ Mingyu’s smile was sheepish and he rubbed at his own neck, ‘I forgot?' 

The older boy huffed, ‘Mingyu, I’ve told you before, put your laundry in the fucking basket… it’s not even that hard.’ It had to be at least the 5th or 6th time that he’d lectured him about leaving random things where they didn’t belong, all in the span of a few days. The younger pouted and Wonwoo turned his head away, biting his lip. He’d upset him again and he didn’t know how to fix that.

Apparently, he didn’t even need to, because Mingyu hopped over to him, still pouting and immediately wrapped his arms around his body. Wonwoo stumbled back, but the younger steadied them and began mumbling apologies in his sensitive ear,

‘I’m really sorry, hyung... Forgive me?’

 

‘I’ll think about it…’ Mingyu whined into his neck at the illusive answer and Wonwoo pinched his side. Using it as his chance to escape from the tight hug, as the younger rubbed at his side. The tall boy was clearly feigning hurt, because he didn’t pinch him that hard at all.

‘meanie.’ The younger voiced petulantly, the older tried to control his smile as he shook his head. Moments like these were incredibly rare, the younger boy always seemed confident and mature, so when he got all cute and whiny, Wonwoo didn’t know what to do with himself.

 

Of course, pretending to be angry wasn’t an option, especially since this wasn’t much of a big deal and it was obvious he wasn’t _really_ angry at all. Plus, he’d already forgiven him, even before he knew he had anything to forgive. So Wonwoo wasn’t angry, just a bit irritated that this kept happening, he simply liked his living space super clean and organised. And thus, dirty gym clothes had no place in his hallway, he needed him to understand that, but the younger was too cute for him to stay mad at. Not that he’d be telling him that, instead he told him to pick up his shit and went to bed.

Wonwoo fell asleep, feeling exhausted, perplexed and content all at once. His mind still fully awake, as it busily conjured up various images and scenarios involving the main thing that occupied his brain.

 

 

 

It seemed he couldn’t escape Mingyu, _even_ in his dreams.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All the recent meanie stuff is killing me. They're so cute & they make it impossible to stop shipping them. <3 I LOVE MEANIE <3
> 
>  
> 
> *drum rolllllllllllllllllllllllll*  
> HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO TINA!!! ;) Thanks for always talking to me & helping me figure things out. I hope you have a great day tomorrow <3<3<3
> 
>  
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do much on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to meet you guys :D
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	34. Chapter 34

Sharing an apartment with Kim Mingyu certainly had its perks, like the mouth-watering warm meals he was fed every day -bad eating habits, where? Not here, that’s for sure.

 

There was also the constant supply of hugs and he always had someone who’d listen to him when he needed to rant. Someone to tell him to stop, when he didn’t realise he was pushing his body too far. Someone who was unconditionally on his side and instantly brightened up his day just by a soft smile.

When mentioning perks, one couldn’t possibly leave out “luxury’s lap”, AKA Mingyu’s car. Which to him was basically a free-of-charge, first-class, instant taxi service. What more could he wish for? So yeah, definitely had its positives.

 

But Wonwoo was just about losing his patience with the other’s surprising lack of hygiene as he tripped over yet another crumbled pile of Mingyu’s dirty laundry. Not the most pleasant of things to happen first thing in the morning of a work day.

He stomped angrily to the younger’s room, banging his fist on the wooden door until Mingyu finally opened it -looking far _too_ happy for Wonwoo’s liking.

‘How many FREAKING TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT, HUH?’

He gave up on being calm half way through his sentence letting his anger rule freely over him.

Then he clamped his eyes shut, reigning it in when he realised it might’ve been a tiny bit uncalled for. ‘We literally talked about this the night before last, Gyu. STOP. IT.’ Irritation and anger still coloured his tone. Although it was much calmer than before, his scowl deepened. 

Mingyu had the audacity to look sheepish, ‘Is this about my dirty gym clothes, because I swear I was planning to do it tonight.’ The younger rushed to explain himself.

 

Wonwoo trusted that Mingyu was telling the truth. He’d realised after living together for a little over a week, that their cleaning habits were starkly different.

Whereas, Wonwoo preferred to clean up little by little as he went along to quickly get rid of any obvious things. Such as, doing the dishes right after every meal and making sure the laundry was in the basket before stepping into the shower or wiping away any spillages before they even had the chance of leaving a stain.

Mingyu was the opposite, he preferred to wait around for a few hours or sometimes even days, before he did something. He just watched unbothered as the dirty laundry, the unwashed dishes from once upon a time and the general clutter, collected dust around him. Only when he felt like things have piled up enough, did he deem it necessary to clean up.

And he always did it all in one go, and when Mingyu got his apron and cleaning hat on -best believe, it’d be a super long spring-cleaning session. From the smelly fridge to the ancient cupboards, the grey floor tiles that were actually meant to be white and the air conditioner filled with dust, the boy cleaned everything thoroughly. He was so meticulous in fact, that Wonwoo couldn’t fault him or annoyingly point out that he’d missed a spot. Because he always cleaned so perfectly that he literally left no corner untouched.

The feeling of utter bliss and calm brought by his exceptionally clean surroundings, would always wear off after a few days. It would start off slow, with a random sock on the kitchen counter or a half-full cup of juice under the sofa. Before quickly snowballing into whole piles of laundry and dirty dishes where they shouldn’t be.

 

Wonwoo was frankly, sick and tired of cleaning up after him. He knew it hadn’t even been that long, but Mingyu’s behaviour seemed ingrained, like a nasty habit that he couldn’t unlearn. It’s a shame Wonwoo couldn’t learn to tolerate it though, it went against his nature, he simply couldn’t focus in an unclean apartment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Later that evening, after hours of gruelling work in the office, they were finally back home. The older boy scowled from his perched position on the sofa, watching as a focused Mingyu embarked on his first spring cleaning session in the last four days. 

He glared at the younger’s back, trying and failing not to ogle his rippling arm and back muscles as he mopped the kitchen floor down with bleach.

Wonwoo ripped his eyes away, refusing to think about how muscular the boy was, and how good it felt to be held by him. Instead he flicked through channels on the tv, only stopping when he found something he deemed interesting enough to occupy his Mingyu-filled brain.

 

 

 

‘Hyung, I’m going grocery shopping. Need anything?’

 

The time on the TV read 10:21pm, as he blinked his eyes, bleary with sleep. When had it already gotten so late? And was that drool he felt dried up on his chin? gross. He must’ve fallen asleep for him to miss the transformation that his apartment underwent, it was a literal glow-up. Mingyu even went as far as burning incense, which made the place smell so pleasant.

 

‘Are you driving there?’

He asked upon recalling the younger’s question and noticing that he was already dressed -looking super attractive in what was, admittedly super casual clothing. Wonwoo should really not be finding that attractive, but it was already established how whipped he was, so he was in the clear. 

‘Yeah, we’re out of rice and laundry detergent, I don’t really wanna carry that all the way home.’

‘Oh, is it?... Cool.’ Wonwoo didn’t know what else to say, grocery shopping wasn’t really something he did either. He’d just let Mingyu naturally fill that role when the latter moved in with him.

 

Mingyu did that cute giggle-thingy, that meant he found something Wonwoo said or did particularly entertaining. ‘Sure you don’t want anything?’ His voice sounded from the door, Wonwoo could tell by the jingle of the keys that he was almost leaving.

‘Actually, wait.’ He shouted on impulse, he didn’t know what possessed him to say that or what to do next, as Mingyu’s head popped around the corner with a questioning gaze. 

‘Yes, hyung?’ the younger urged, after Wonwoo’s continuous silence.

He blinked back twice, he just felt like he didn’t want him to leave just yet, he was mad at him for not cleaning up before things piled up, but he also just wanted to hug him and forget that they weren’t more than just friends.

If only Mingyu wasn’t already interested in someone else, this would’ve been so much easier.

‘I- I wanna come with you.’ He sighed,

 

Mingyu raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow at the unexpected answer. Wonwoo never joined him grocery shopping -and the one-time Mingyu suggested it, he got a glare so severe that he felt like Wonwoo was trying to literally burn him alive.

 

So, he was thoroughly amused as he watched the smaller boy padding out of his bedroom with a big yellow hoodie -that was actually Mingyu’s- over his black t-shirt and black sweats. He pushed his dark hair away from his pale forehead and threw on a black beanie, putting on his white trainers and grabbing his round glasses before walking -right past a grinning Mingyu- to the parking lot.

 

 

 

Wonwoo remained outwardly silent, while his thoughts screamed at him in discord. He wondered if Mingyu could sense his troubled aura. But if he did, he didn’t show it. Walking silently beside the older boy all the way to the car. It was only after they’d both buckled up and were preparing to move off that Mingyu spoke up, albeit uncertainly.

‘Hyung, if you’re still upset about the laundry thing, then I’m really sorry. I’ll try to be more considerate of your wishes next time.’ 

Wonwoo laughed, he couldn’t help it. Here he was, having a crisis while trying to figure out the best way to deal with his detrimental crush on his friend, co-worker and flatmate. When the said object of his affections was innocently going on about a pile of insignificant laundry.

 

It was painfully endearing how clueless Mingyu was about Wonwoo’s feelings. Which made the latter feel even worse about the whole situation, especially when it was clear that Mingyu didn’t pick up on them nor did he seem to return them -or at least it felt that way.

He blamed the “asshole.”, he would’ve had a chance, if he wasn’t in the picture.

‘Just shut up and drive.’

 

Mingyu complied, like he usually did with most of Wonwoo’s commands and requests -you’d think he was a trained lapdog with the sole purpose of serving Wonwoo.

With that new information, he wondered if Mingyu would date him if he ordered him to, there was a possibility. But the last thing Wonwoo wanted to do, was project his feelings onto the younger and burden him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘Are you done yet?’

Wonwoo droned for the nth time in the last 20 minutes, he didn’t go grocery shopping for good reason -shit took forever.

‘Aaaalmost... Hey, if you’re bored why don’t you go get the kimchi. The big one, ok’

He quickly added the last part when Wonwoo started moving away to search the maze-like aisles for the sour side dish.

 

In all his 24 years of life, he’d never felt so overwhelmed. Living on a supply of convenience store bought items was so much easier and less time-consuming in his humble opinion.

 

Like seriously, who even needs all these different types of kimchi and for the life of him he couldn’t remember which brand they used.

He felt a mild pounding in his head and cursed how sensitive he was in unfamiliar or uncomfortable situations -it always led to headaches and he really didn’t need that right now.

He scanned the aisles again, walking slowly and even crouching when necessary -making sure to look both at the frozen and Chilled section as well as the normal display. He reached the end of the aisle, hoping that at least one of the large variety of kimchi would look familiar to him. 

But nothing.

 

Mingyu had mentioned “the big one” but that was so vague -there are so many big ones. He closed his eyes and chose one at random, the idea of going back empty handed making him feel inferior in some way -and Wonwoo _hated_ losing.

 

 

 

 

 

He found his roommate in the meat section, normally people didn’t even have to bend much for this section -but Mingyu was ridiculously tall so he was an exception to the rule. He seemed so preoccupied with all the meats that he didn’t even notice Wonwoo’s return.

Again. Who the hell needed all this meat anyway. They literally filled up an entire aisle by cutting up different parts of the animal and displaying them separately as if it were a completely new thing. He was pretty sure leg beef and arm beef were exactly the same thing -a cow.

 

The smell was making him nauseous and the kimchi was heavy, so he thought it would be his chance to feel if Mingyu’s round butt was just as firm and muscular as the rest of him. He poked him right in the left ass-cheek with his foot, wishing that he wasn’t wearing shoes, so he could really feel.

Mingyu just hummed, not moving away from studying the two types of bacon in his hands.

Of course, the cart was right there and Wonwoo could’ve easily just dropped the 5kg kimchi in there himself -but he really just wanted some attention.

He poked him, more firmly this time and right in the asshole, Mingyu fell over, a mock-scandalous look on his otherwise handsome features.

 

‘Jeon Wonwoo!’ He mock-gasped from his position on the floor, the older boy scowled at him and Mingyu nearly had a coughing fit with how hard he laughed.

Trust Mingyu to never take Wonwoo seriously, ‘Hyung, wha-what is that?’ He barely managed with all his wheezing, his face red with the effort of holding back more chuckles.

 

‘Kimchi.’ Wonwoo replied in a deadpan tone -channelling his inner Jihoon, years of friendship with the definition of nonchalant came in handy after all.

The younger boy looked like he was about to say something, he must’ve changed his mind, though. Seeing as he bit his lip and wordlessly transferred the heavy bag from Wonwoo’s tired arms to the cart. He picked up both varieties of bacon that he was previously scrutinising and dropped them in as well.

Then he stood up in all his six foot one -and a half inch- glory, and pulled a sulking Wonwoo to his side by throwing his long arm over the older’s broad shoulders.

 

How Mingyu managed to still decently drive the full cart with one hand was beyond Wonwoo. Not that he was particularly curious anyway, his crush had his arm around him in public -the moon could turn green and he’d still not be interested in anything else.

 

They played SNSD songs all the way back home. Wonwoo seemed to be particularly enjoying himself as he sang along with child-like enthusiasm. Mingyu just tried not to crash the car as he stole intermittent glances at Wonwoo with a fond smile.

 

When the time came to unload the shopping, and put everything where it belonged, Wonwoo was nowhere to be found. Mingyu shook his head, already used to doing all of it on his own, anyway. If anything, he was grateful that Wonwoo came along, since he enjoyed having him around.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo loved being able to read to his heart’s content. His apartment was quiet, spotlessly clean and it smelt incredible. Therefore, despite the late hour, he chose to do just _that_ , grateful that it was already Friday, which meant that he’d be able to sleep in tomorrow.

Because, he’d be a total square if he didn’t take advantage of these ideal conditions. So, he used a strawberry scented bath bomb and got comfy in the warm water with one of his favourite novellas in hand. If he were asked to describe this moment, then one word would suffice -heaven.

 

He was about a third of the way done when a delicious scent seeped through the cracks under the door, causing him to hum in excitement and appreciation. Five minutes later and the water was beginning to feel cooler, so he drained the tub, threw on a loose stripy, thin sweater along with a fresh pair of underwear and some grey sweats. He didn’t bother fixing his hair as he launched himself into the kitchen,

‘Whachu making? It smells ridiculously good’ 

Mingyu chuckled at his enthusiasm and adorable pronunciation as he continued to stir some kind of vegetable-meat dish. There was another pot cooking alongside it and also something in the oven. But due to his lack of culinary knowledge, Wonwoo had no idea what any of it was. Just that it smelled good and he couldn’t wait to get it in his mouth.

 

‘YOU smell ridiculously good, another bath bomb?’

Strike Mingyu the casual flirt, the words rolled off his tongue so naturally that all Wonwoo could do in that moment was nod.

The taller boy seemed to be done with the food as he turned off all the knobs and took a few casual steps towards Wonwoo. Except there was nothing casual about the distance between them -or lack thereof. As they were now almost chest-to-chest and Wonwoo’s pupils were darting around in sheer panic.

He didn’t know whether he should push him off or indulge himself.

 

Mingyu’s head began leaning down into Wonwoo’s breathing space before the older boy could make up his mind.

Freaking out to the point where he was almost hyperventilating, he managed to turn to the side -just in time for Mingyu’s face to land on the exposed skin where his collarbone met his shoulder.

The collar of his loose shirt had fallen off long ago and he didn’t know whether he should be happy or angry about that.

Strong arms wrapped around his tiny waistline, rubbing soothing circles into his lower back. Mingyu’s nose travelled higher up his neck, filling up on his scent with the enthusiasm of a deprived crackhead snorting in a batch of pure cocaine.

 

‘Hmmmm...’ he hummed, Wonwoo didn’t even know why that simple sound felt so sensual to him,

 

‘Strawberry?’

Mingyu lifted his head up a fraction so he could look at Wonwoo while he awaited a confirmation.

The older boy gulped, ‘Y-yeah. Strawberry.’

 

Smiling he went back to burying his face in the shorter’s neck. Wonwoo thought “screw it” as he brought his arms around Mingyu’s waist and hugged him back tightly.

 

 

They broke apart eventually, when both their empty stomachs simultaneously growled at them to be fed.

 

 

 

 

 

After a satisfying meal, Wonwoo did the dishes and went to sleep. Startling, on the way to his bedroom as he was ambushed with a warm back-hug from his flat mate. He couldn’t help but smile as the younger wished him “sweet dreams” before leaving him alone with his loud thoughts.

 

Feeling physically relaxed while his heart remained stressed and his mind constantly looped Mingyu-related thoughts in his brain.

Specifically, his conversation with Soonyoung and Jihoon this past Wednesday. After he’d confessed his thoughts on the messy Mingyu situation, that he’d found himself in.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_~~~flashback~~~_ **

 

‘Woah, that’s like, a real-life love triangle.’ Soonyoung’s eyes widened into the size of actual saucers as he spoke.

Wonwoo deadpanned, he wanted advice, not silly remarks.

‘It’s not.’ He sighed, laying down on the couch and just reviewing what little of the lyrics he’d managed to write, before the need to vent got too strong.

 

‘It is. There’s 3 people involved.’ Soonyoung argued back incessantly, that wasn’t even the point. The taller sat back up, narrowing his eyes at the now dark-purple haired boy. He appreciated the change up, red was just too obnoxious for a hair colour and he was glad it was gone. 

‘That doesn’t make it a triangle, it’s more like a straight line. I like Mingyu, Mingyu likes that awful guy and I don’t think that devil likes Mingyu back either. It’s just a line of unrequited love.’ As he got to the end of his explanation, his voice got smaller and his face lost some of its light, it mirrored his inner sadness perfectly.

 

Jihoon must’ve picked up on the heartbreaking tone as he removed his headphones and wheeled his chair closer to them. ‘A love triangle implies that each of the three-people involved have romantic ties with the other two, although sometimes it’s also used to refer to two people that are independently fighting for the love of a third... So in Wonwoo’s case, it’s not a love triangle.’ 

‘Thanks for clarifying Jihoon, but that’s not really what I need to hear.’ He rolled his eyes, sighing dramatically.

Jihoon looked at him seriously and Wonwoo thought he’d finally be getting some advice. But he must’ve thought too soon because at that exact moment the short boy rolled his eyes at him and said, ‘Wonwoo, we can’t really tell you what to do. If Mingyu’s told you he likes someone else, then it means he’s not interested in you’

 

‘Orrrrrrr, he could be tryna get you jealous.’ Both boys turned to the purple-haired boy with deadpan expressions, Soonyoung simply shrugged and continued smiling.

 

‘Jealous?...’ Wonwoo repeated with a confused scowl, ‘why would he do that? ...Mingyu would say something if he liked me.’

The idea was ludicrous, and his fist clenched involuntarily, he wanted to hit Soonyoung for putting thoughts in his head.

Mingyu didn’t like him, Wonwoo wasn’t that lucky.

 

‘Do you know much about Mingyu’s crush?’ Jihoon asked seriously after some silence. Wonwoo tilted his head in confusion, why was that even relevant? Were they even trying to help?

‘All I know is that they’re “close”, he got super drunk, Mingyu took him home, they kissed, the dumbass doesn’t remember and ummm... he’s an asshole, but Mingyu loves him.’ He shrugged at the last part, all facts so he couldn’t even feel wronged by it. 

Jihoon looked up so fast from his coffee, that he swore he heard his neck crack, Wonwoo grimaced at the sound.

‘Did he tell you when that happened? After Christmas or before?’

the short boy asked slowly.

 

The tall boy scowled deeper, slouching in place, ‘Why does that even matter?’ He complained.

‘It’s important, tell me. Was it before or after?’ Wonwoo’s face scrunched in utter confusion, his short friend was rarely ever this persistent. So it must be important, but he failed to understand it.

‘I’m pretty sure it was before, I think...’ it definitely didn’t happen after they moved in together, he would’ve known if Mingyu was out all night, looking after a drunk asshole, so this made more sense.

 

Jihoon leaned back on his chair with a thoughtful expression, then a creepy smile took over his face and he began nodding slowly. ‘You said you two are close right?’ 

Nodding in answer to Jihoon’s question, he turned back to the lyrics on the notepad. The younger boy asked another question, ‘You said he confuses you with all the skinship and how he takes care of you and buys you things and just stares at you while you eat, always asks to be around you and take you to wherever you need to go.’

 

He slammed the pen down on his notebook and fixed the short boy with a pointed look, ‘That’s what I said Jihoon, What’s your fucking point?’ He spat in frustration, this wasn’t helping at all, it made him regret ever telling them.

 

‘Don’t worry Won, I’m confused too.’ Both boys turned to the new voice, Wonwoo blinked at his purple-haired friend, ‘I thought you left since I couldn’t hear your screaming.’ He stated truthfully.

Jihoon chuckled at Soonyoung’s affronted expression,

‘That’s mean. I was thinking...’

‘Don’t hurt yourself.’ He replied, and burst into laughter with the shorter boy while the purple-haired one, made a show of being angry,

‘No wonder why Mingyu doesn’t like you, you’re rude as fuck.’ Soonyoung huffed in mock-anger while Wonwoo fake cried.

But he felt actual physical pain at those words. Of course, he knew that wasn’t the reason, but it was a fact that Mingyu didn’t like him. And he couldn’t help but wonder why. What did that asshole have that he lacked?

Jihoon’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts and he listened, completely confused,

 

‘Everything will be just great in the end. Don’t stress too much and have fun with it.’ 

Sighing at Jihoon’s calm words and relaxed expression, he looked up with a small pout, ‘how do you know that?’

 

‘Don’t worry, just trust me on this.’

Wonwoo was very sceptical to say the least but that seemed to be all the advice the pair had to offer. So, he took what he got and forgot the rest.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now it was Friday night, a whole 48 hours passed and Wonwoo was still confused about that night in the studio.

As he slept peacefully, he was interrupted by a familiar dream. It was the same cat dream, from a few nights ago and it replayed in his unconscious brain. Following the same exact confusing sequence.

He’d probably not remember any of it when he woke up, but he wanted to at least be able to recall some of it.

All Wonwoo could do in his current, subconscious state was hope because, the human brain was an enigma, an unsolved mystery and sometimes things happened up there which had no place in reality.

 

 

Things such as the incidents from his recurring dream, which left him a little bit hot and a lot confused.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting kinda busy with work these days, so I'm not too sure how long I can keep updating regularly. But I'll try as much as I can. Thanks for sticking around, I really appreciate all of you <3
> 
> As always, follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono), if you're interested. I don't do much on there, but we can chat & stuff :) It's always a real pleasure to meet you guys :D
> 
> Thank you for reading, please leave kudos and comments (good/bad, & why).


	35. Chapter 35

Wonwoo was at his desk at home, typing, erasing and re-typing again. Adjusting his punctuation, fixing his paragraphs, rewording his sentences, only to erase everything and begin typing all over again. He was in the midst of combating his writer’s block, trying to stick with his new year resolution to write more. So far, it wasn’t going too well, he wasn’t liking any of what he wrote, and he felt like it was lacking something he couldn’t give. Wonwoo didn’t even know what that was, it wasn’t good enough.

There was a time when Wonwoo was a fountain of inspiration, new thoughts and ideas pouring from him without fail, the moment he began to type. At some point in time he thinks that fountain has ran dry, the final drip falling, before it seized to flow altogether.

He was no longer inspired now. He felt like all his recent attempts had managed to do was poke at the blockage that stopped the water from flowing through his fountain. He wasn’t however, successful in removing it yet, but he promised his past self that he’d keep trying -and that’s exactly what he intended to do.

 

He groaned out loud, staring at the ceiling of his bedroom while he violently spun around in his desk chair. Weekends were meant for relaxing, yet here he was giving himself unnecessary stress, to add to his already stressed brain.

He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he failed to hear the tentative knock and light footsteps of his flat-mate.

 

He did however, catch his attention with his sweet husky tone of voice -asking if he was okay.

‘Leave me alone, Mingyu. I’m busy thinking.’

 

He heard rustling and lowered his gaze to check what the other was doing. He sighed once he caught Mingyu’s bright smile, while the puppy-like boy sat on his bed.

Of course, he wouldn’t leave.

Since when did Mingyu leave as told, without having his way with Wonwoo first. The answer was never, he knew already. But he always hoped the younger would surprise him by actually letting him be for once.

‘Hyung, I just need a few minutes. I wanna give you something.’

 

He looked bashful as he stared at the ground, avoiding eye contact with Wonwoo. The latter tilted his head, trying to gauge the meaning of the sudden shyness. This was so unlike the casual, confident flirt that he’d gotten acquainted with over the past few weeks.

Mingyu had his attention now, and he wasn’t about to miss the chance to tease the hell out of the younger. He began speaking in a teasingly suggestive tone, not bothering to hide his suspicions.

‘What? Is it another one of your “gift”s?...’ Mingyu looked up so quickly at the question, that Wonwoo was surprised he didn’t get whiplash. He'll take that as a "yes", but he wasn’t over the phone thing yet.

 

 Their gazes clashed and Mingyu spoke in a surprised voice. ‘HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?!’

 

Wonwoo shrugged, looking away when he couldn’t handle the intensity of the other’s gaze. He mumbled his answer.

‘I only guessed. Stop giving me shit, Mingyu… Keep your money. _Please._ ’

‘Well... You guessed correctly. It’s not something I can return, and it didn’t cost much either. So, you can accept them without feeling guilty. _I_ want to give you things, _you_ can’t stop me.’ The younger crossed his arms with a determined pout and Wonwoo rolled his eyes. Honestly, there wasn’t much flaw in what the younger said, it wasn’t even the first time he’d told him that.

It seemed as though, he really couldn’t stop him from getting him things, the only thing that was within his control was whether he accepted or not. But it’s not like he had much choice there either, because he’d be the bad guy if he rejected, especially if it didn’t cost much, as Mingyu claimed.

 

‘Wanna check them out?’ The younger sounded excited as he hopped off the bed and waited for Wonwoo’s reply.

 

‘Them? there's more than _one_?’ 

Wonwoo looked up to Mingyu in what could only be described as child-like awe. Now that he decided to accept the younger’s gifts as long they weren’t ridiculously overpriced, his inner child was rejoicing. His entire body buzzed with excitement, barely stopping himself from vibrating in his seat.

 

‘I’ll explain in my room, let’s go.’

He glanced at the empty word document on the screen, his lack of inspiration making him feel lazy and unmotivated. Wonwoo groaned, ‘I don’t wanna move though. Can’t you bring “them” here?’ He fluttered his eyelashes and pouted slightly, he knew he looked cute but somehow Mingyu didn’t fall for it.

Instead he poked his protruding bottom lip, his smile almost fond. Wonwoo flustered, immediately swatting the intrusive hand away, to glare at him.

 

The younger shrugged, ‘If you don’t come with me, I’ll just throw them out... You said you don’t want them anyway.’ strong arms crossed over his broad chest, Mingyu looked serious with his threat.

 

Wonwoo gasped in pure shock. ‘You wouldn’t.’

Then he gulped uncertainly,

 

Mingyu half-smirked.

‘Watch me.’

 

Wonwoo was out of his chair and speed-walking towards the door, even before Mingyu fully turned around to exit the room. He heard the younger’s chuckles but ignored it.

 

 

He sat cross-legged on the taller boy’s bed. The covers crispy white with teal-coloured leaves printed on the soft material, he’d seen the unusual colour pop-up randomly in their apartment since the younger moved in.

He wondered if this was the other’s favourite colour, just as the man himself finally strolled into the room with a knowing smile, hands arrogantly placed in the pockets of his black slacks.

‘Someone’s eager.’ The taller slurred, but Wonwoo didn’t take offence. In fact, he beamed because he was too excited to care if Mingyu knew the outcome all along.

The younger lowered himself onto the floor right beside the bed, positioning himself so that he could see Wonwoo clearly.

 

The latter was fidgeting, unable to sit still due to the excitement. Mingyu placed his palm on the older’s thigh, causing him to still and look down at him expectantly. 

‘Don’t have high expectations, I don’t want you to feel underwhelmed when you open them.’

 

In a moment of bravery, the older boy covered the hand on his thigh with his own and bit back a grin as he sincerely confessed.

‘I’m happy enough to know you got me a gift, the nature of that gift is irrelevant. It’s the thought that counts.’

His own face heated up at the truth behind the confession. Obviously, he wanted the gift to be something he’d enjoy receiving. But honestly, he loved the gifts already just because Mingyu was the one giving them. And Wonwoo was very biased. 

‘Did you bathe in grease this morning?’ Mingyu pretended to gag. Scrunching up his face in amusement, his eyes were twinkling. The older boy could tell he was touched by the words.

The hand under his own moved to lace their fingers together.

 

That’s when Wonwoo found his voice again. Unfortunately, his humour seemed to have evaded him.

‘I don’t even have the time to get to Greece, let alone bathe there.’

Mingyu tried really hard not to laugh, Wonwoo could tell. But his attempted poker face was red and quaking, he burst into uncontrollable laughter -not even 5 seconds later.

 

When he calmed down enough, he shook his head at the older boy, who shrugged innocently in return.

He got poked in the cheek, Mingyu’s lanky limbs somehow reaching up there. 

‘Jeon Wonwoo. You. Will be the death of me.’

 

Something within him fell hard at the sincerity in those words. But he was still in a jokey mood, so he didn’t take it too seriously.

‘Give me my gifts before you die then.’

He extended both his palms towards Mingyu, and the younger slapped them playfully.

 

‘You’re still such a meanie, hyung.’

Wonwoo crossed his arms over his dark green hoodie and shrugged. ‘I’ll take that as a compliment.’

‘You’re impossible.’ The younger sighed -albeit grinning widely. Wonwoo felt a sarcastic comment bubbling in his mind and didn’t try to stop it.

‘Wooow. So very observant.’

Mingyu chuckled lightly, then he sobered up, seeming like he’d just remembered something important.

 

‘I wanna say something before I give you the gifts.’

‘Say it, then.’ pulling his hood up, he leaned his elbows on his knees. Mingyu shifted under his intent gaze and Wonwoo tilted his head, at the continued display of uncharacteristic shyness from the younger.

 

‘Read the cards properly, or it won’t make sense. Cuz I’m not gonna talk at all from now on.’

It seemed the younger was really back to being shy again, Wonwoo noticed the pink on his cheeks, despite the tan. He had to restrain himself from kissing the soft flesh.

‘Let’s hope your handwriting is legible then.’ He only half-joked, because he didn’t know what Mingyu’s handwriting was like. In fact, he’d only seen the other type before.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, then he pulled a medium sized box from under his bed and handed it to Wonwoo.

 

Looking expectantly at him as the older analysed the box. The wrapping paper was glittery green and a wide red ribbon was expertly tied around it, forming a beautiful bow in the centre.

 

‘Can I ask a question?’ he voiced suddenly,

The younger had said he wouldn’t be speaking but he just wanted to know if Mingyu wrapped it himself.

‘You can, but I won’t answer’

Wonwoo chuckled pointing an index finger at Mingyu.

‘You just answered though' 

Mingyu closed his eyes, opened them, held a hand up and began folding one finger at a time. Just before folding the final one he said,

‘Startiiiiiing NOW’

Then he proceeded to imitate a zipper being pulled shut over his lips and crossed his arms as his face took on a mock-serious expression.

 

‘Dramatic idiot.’

When he got no reaction. He sighed and began to undo the pretty ribbon, gently unwrapping the green paper, to reveal a baby pink coloured box with a Christmas card on top. Well, that explained the colours at least. Was he meant to receive this at Christmas?

The card was small, fitting nicely in his palm as he opened it and cleared his throat. He decided that in order to maximise the embarrassment for Mingyu he’d read the cards out loud. His voice was at least an octave higher as he exaggerated an imitation of Mingyu.

“ _Dear Wonwoo-hyung._

_We only met recently & got off on the wrong foot. But strangely I feel like I’ve known you for much longer than I have. You’re a really funny, sweet person even though you try to hide it._”

 

Well, he definitely hit the nail on the head there. Wonwoo liked Mingyu, so obviously he had to hide it. Unbeknownst to him, his voice had lowered from the dramatically high pitch and at some point, he found himself reading in his normal deep baritone voice. Wonwoo paused, taking a breath and glancing at Mingyu who was hiding his face in his palms -probably embarrassed. Cute. He continued reading,

 

“ _This is just me hoping that we’ll grow closer, because I really wanna get to know you better. I wasn’t sure what you liked but this reminded me of you so I had to get it._

_Wishing you a very Merry Christmas,_

_Lots of love, Kim Mingyu._ ”

 

He pursed his lips and looked down, blushing at how pure-hearted and sweet that was. Also, he noticed that Mingyu’s handwriting was quite neat, easy to read and pretty to look at. Much like the writer.

Mingyu was peeking at Wonwoo through a gap in his fingers, since his pretty hands were still covering his face. The gap was gone and the younger ducked his head when he realised Wonwoo was staring. 

The older chuckled under his breath, then he lifted the lid of the box after a deep inhale.

He removed the paper and bubble wrap slowly -it must be fragile, he mused- his fingers finally grazing a smooth, cool object.

 

He lifted it cautiously, it was rounded and made of glass. A snow globe. Did Mingyu know how much Wonwoo loved snow?

Intricate designs swirled around the base of it in a deep purple -was Mingyu aware that was his favourite colour?

He wished he could ask, but Mingyu said he wouldn’t reply so he didn’t -ask, that is. Instead, he shook the globe and the softly floating snow captured his attention.

Inside the globe there was a mini-Christmas tree, a sledge being pulled by four reindeers and in the middle of it all, stood a slim boy.

His hands were in the air and his head facing upwards, at the glass sky. He was dressed in all black clothing, black jacket, black pants, black boots, black hat, black scarf and even black gloves. He felt himself shiver at the coincidence, unable to deny how much the boy in the globe resembled HIMSELF.

 

‘Wow...’ the word slipped out unintentionally, he was awed into captivity. Then a bright grin stretched over his face and he had to bite his lip to control it, before it split his face in two. He was _that_ happy, he loved it.

But since the younger wasn’t talking, he decided to keep his thoughts to himself. For now.

Carefully putting the snow globe aside, he extended his hand for the second gift, speaking up only when Mingyu started looking confused.

 

‘I’ve decided I'm not telling you what I think, until you wanna answer my questions.’ It was pretty obvious how much he loved it anyway, it wasn't like he was keeping the younger in the dark or being mean, the happiness was written all over his face.

Mingyu’s pout was adorable, but he was still avoiding Wonwoo’s gaze. He looked so much more his age like this, all cute and shy.

 

His hand disappeared beneath the bed once more and he pulled out a much smaller rectangular gift. It was wrapped in purple this time and Wonwoo seriously considered kissing Mingyu just because of his choice of wrapping paper. The gift was the appropriate size and shape to possibly be a book. The card was taped to the surface of the gift this time so he removed it, first.

It had red roses and kisses, in the centre was a simple “miss you” printed in flourishes of black ink, he could be wrong but it eerily resembled a valentine’s card. Weird, it wasn’t even February yet.

He opened it and instantly regretted his decision to read aloud. Not least, because there was so much writing, filling up both sides but also because he glimpsed some words that he’d rather not say with his own mouth.

Nevertheless, it was a choice he made so sadly, he had to stick with it.

 

“ _My Dearest Squishy,_

_If you’re reading this, it means we live together now._

_Congratulations! For having the very awesome ME in your life. I know you like me, since you’ve already said it ;) but I wanna let you know that I like you a lot too._ ”

 

This is where reading got hard, his voice became clogged with emotion. He realised this must've been written much more recently, at least according to the use of that insufferable nickname. Clearing his throat he continued on,

 

“ _In such a short amount of time, I’ve come to trust you greatly and you’ve become so important to me so quickly. I might be a friendly, excitable kind of guy, but I take a while to warm up to people. So this is a first for me._

_I honestly think we were destined to be close, but I want us to be even closer in the future._

_Hoping this gift makes you smile because you deserve all the happiness in the world, and I wish I could give it all to you. But I can’t yet, so accept this piece of my heart, for now._

 

_You are the cutest, funniest, sweetest, handsomest most squishiest person I know and even that is an understatement._

_I really wasn’t going to give this gift away to anyone. But you’re special, so you better enjoy it._

_P.S. DO NOT ask me how I got it, I can’t tell._

_Thank you for being you,_

_With love, Kim Mingyu._ ”

 

Wonwoo’s voice was barely audible as he reached the end of the message. As much as it was sweet and caring, it was also confusing.

Especially because Wonwoo had romantic feelings for the younger. All this message served to do was pour gasoline on the softly burning flames of those feelings, causing them to instantly grow into a wild, scorching flash-fire. The only person able to tame it was Mingyu, but he had no idea what Wonwoo was feeling.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and suppressed the rising emotion, he couldn’t even look at the younger as he tore the wrapping paper off. Just as he’d predicted it was a book, more precisely a fiction novel.

However, the book slipped out of his hands the moment he read the title, he realised just what this was.

 

“ _Lightening & Silence, the sequel by J.H._”

 

The novel that he’d fallen in love with, finished reading in just a day and searched restlessly for the second instalment of, was _right_ in his lap. 

And he gaped in shock, he couldn’t believe it.

How did Mingyu get his hands on this? And more importantly why would he give _him_ such a rare book?

 

‘Oh my god... M-Mingyu, I don-don’t know what to s-say’

A single tear somehow escaped his right tear-duct and trailed down his cheek, he wiped it harshly. Why the hell was he crying? He hated crying.

Mingyu silently climbed beside the emotional boy on his bed and wrapped his arms around him, hugging him to his chest.

Wonwoo covered his face, angry and ashamed that he couldn’t get the tears to stop flowing.

The younger held him gently, his nimble fingers softly caressing his hair -as he began to rock them lightly, from side-to-side.

 

‘I’m sorry, hyung. I didn’t mean to make you cry.’

A whisper against the crown of his head, a thought suddenly hit him and he sobered a bit -did his hair smell ok? Judging by the way Mingyu was snuggling him, he assumed it did.

 

‘D-don’t... ap-pologise.’

There was no need for it. It wasn’t Mingyu’s fault that he was born so perfect nor could he be blamed for Wonwoo’s soft heart. He was crying out of pure joy, anyway.

 

‘But I made you cry.’ Mingyu’s tone was so clueless and confused.

‘Ha-ppy tears.’ He managed, between the hiccups and the sniffles. 

‘Really?!... Still though, I’d rather see you smile than this.’

He sniffled, the tears finally seeming to have stopped. Lifting his head from the younger’s chest with flushed cheeks, he scowled at the younger’s cringeworthy confession.

‘Shut up.’

‘Can I have the cute, emotional Wonwoo back. This one’s rude.’

They both smiled softly at one another, then Wonwoo’s humourless sarcasm made a comeback.

‘Sorry, we don’t do exchanges or refunds here. You’re stuck with me.’

 

The younger threw his muscular arm around Wonwoo and beamed, ‘Nice.’

‘Nice?’ The older boy repeated with a raised eyebrow. He thought Mingyu liked the “other” Wonwoo.

‘VERY NICE!’ Mingyu said with a nod, his grin full-on curing illnesses and lighting up the darkness in the universe at this point.

 

‘I thought you liked the “other” Wonwoo.’

Mingyu continued to smile, listing off his thoughts as he folded a finger after each one.

 

‘I like squishy-Wonwoo, smiley-Wonwoo, happy Wonwoo, excited-Wonwoo, serious-Wonwoo, cringeworthy-Wonwoo, Rude-Wonwoo, unfunny-Wonwoo, shy-Wonwoo, scary-Wonwoo, stupid-Wonwoo, drunk-Wonwoo, smart-Wonwoo, cute-Wonwoo, sleepy-Wonwoo, clingy-Wonwoo and all the other Wonwoos. BUT my favourite is you, Jeon Wonwoo.’

The younger bopped him on the nose when he said the final one, Wonwoo was too shocked to react, how did the younger manage to say all that without pausing to think. More importantly when had Mingyu seen some of those other Wonwoos, especially the “un-funny” one, he didn’t even exist.

 

He belatedly slapped the younger on the chest, his face instantly turning red. His pectorals were firm under his hand and much more defined that he initially thought -he wanted to rip through the younger’s white button-up shirt and really feel him. He shook his head internally and locked that thought away.

‘As if the cards weren’t creepy enough, now you’re even saying creepier things aloud.’

He shook his head in disbelief. The only reply he got was Mingyu pulling him back to his chest and rubbing soothing circles on his hoodie-clad back. Strangely, he felt the touches more intimately.

Something about the way Mingyu’s fingers glided on his back, made him feel like he wasn’t even wearing any clothes. His cool shattered and his inner fan girl was on the verge of a mental breakdown. The younger really knew exactly how to un-do Wonwoo and make him feel weak.

 

They didn’t know how long they stayed in that position as time went by. And they probably would’ve remained longer in each other’s arms, if it weren’t for the disturbingly shrill ringtone of Mingyu’s phone.

Wonwoo rolled his eyes, lifting his head from Mingyu’s chest and sitting upright. He scowled, irritated at the intrusion. Trust the universe to never allow him enjoyment in life.

He was so busy internally cursing at life that he hadn’t noticed Mingyu’s actions, almost chasing after him. The taller boy now, had his arms wound around his slim waist, head resting on his Wonwoo's shoulder. 

What the hell? -Wonwoo’s mind was just as confused as him, apparently.

Surely, Mingyu heard the phone, he was certain even the neighbours could hear -it was that loud.

 

Surprisingly though, Mingyu wasn’t budging despite the continued ringing.

‘Answer the phone, doofus.’

He pushed at the younger, prompting him to move. Pleasantly shocked, when the younger whined and held on tighter. Face now buried in his neck, it was warm and it tickled, he blushed scarlet and his heart fluttered. Too much. This was too much.

 

Wonwoo summoned all the strength in his upper body and effectively shoved the younger off of him.

Stomping over to the phone himself, when it began ringing for the third time. He had half a mind to answer it and yell profanities at the devil who kept shitting on his moment. But he thought it wise not to, thankfully.

He grabbed the humongous white thing, swiped right to answer and almost hurled it at a pouting Mingyu. Who surprisingly caught it with mild-shock, putting it to his ear when he realised he had no other choice.

 

Then, he collected his gifts and cards and slipped quietly back to his room, leaving a giggly preoccupied Mingyu behind.

He was the reason Mingyu was on the phone. He was the reason he was no longer the object of the younger’s affection and the sole recipient of his attention. He DID push him away and answer the phone, after all.

But he was still salty, after witnessing how quickly Mingyu stopped noticing him. He couldn’t help but feel discarded, replaced and ignored. Could it be that he’d facilitated Mingyu to be on the phone with his crush? There was no other explanation for the sudden irrational anger and sour mood -he was jealous.

 

Wonwoo placed the snow globe on his nightstand and the book on his desk. He really _did_ love the gifts, although they were nothing too fancy or expensive. They had meaning and those were always the best. As for the cards, he placed them at the back of the top shelf in his wardrobe. Safely hidden from prying eyes, but still close by for when he needed to smile a bit.

Wonwoo laid down in bed, proceeded to untangle his earphones, connecting them to his phone and tapping on his “depressing ballads” playlist. Then he put both ear buds in, closing his eyes as he effectively blocked out the world and allowed himself the freedom to be sad.

 

Wonwoo loved a good heart wrenching ballad, the broken voices that gave him indescribably excruciating pain and the devastating lyrics that sent him spiralling into the depths of depression. He loved them because they were relatable, because they weren’t like those superficial love songs where people met, fell in love and everything was great. It mirrored his inner gloom, catered to his broken heart and soothed his rampant doubt-filled brain. Hearing the sheer amount of pain in someone else’s story somehow gave him comfort, reassuring him that he didn’t even have it bad, that he was in control. That something as silly as a crush shouldn’t be ruling his life. Then one of his favourite songs began playing, not quite a ballad but it was too good to leave out of any playlist. Lyrics he’d never been able to relate to for so many years, reverberated in his ears and it strangely felt like he was hearing it again for the very first time, the tears immediately welled in his eyes as he listened along,

 

“ _I just like everything about you_

_I like listening to your voice_

_Even your jokes that aren’t funny_

_Whenever I think of you my heart just won’t listen to me_

_You just need to come a little closer_

_Why are you hesitating so much?_

_You just need to take one step_

_One step one step one step_

_You can try to hide but I see it all_

_I know your heart_

_But you pretend to push me away_

_You just need to take one step_ ”

 

They definitely struck a chord with him, everything from the fact that he’d admitted loving Mingyu’s voice, to laughing with him even when nothing was funny. But especially the part where his heart refused to listen. Always beating deafeningly loud in his ears and making him feel faint and dazed with his simple presence.

 

The real reason behind the hot fat tears, however, wasn’t even any of that. He ripped the earphones out and curled under his blankets with his eyes clamped shut. Tears somehow still managed to squeeze through his lashes and roll over his cheeks, when he really listened to the chorus’s lyrics.

He realised just how much he wanted that to be true, how desperate he was for Mingyu to feel that for him and actually tell him those things. Most of all he realised how wrong and hopeless he was, because yes, Mingyu felt that. But it wasn’t for him.

Mingyu did want to say those things. But not to him.

They were just friends, and Kim Mingyu was in love with someone else.

He stopped trying to control the tears, letting them fall freely from his eyes, staining his pillow case and drenching his sweaterpaws as he dabbed at them. He curled tighter and continued crying, the last thought ringing out with an air of finality in his head over and over again, until it was all he could think about.

His mind was silent, otherwise. Thoughtless, for the first time in a long time, and his heart was deceivingly calm, as his body trembled with the force of his devastation. There wasn’t even anymore confusion, no more blind hope, no reading between lines that needed to be done. Mingyu was in love with someone. And that was that.

He should’ve stopped while he was ahead, before he allowed himself to get attached, to have expectations and grow the seeds of hope, that flourished under Mingyu’s care and consideration. He’d been hoping for a miracle, one that he now realised now didn’t exist for him. They weren’t meant to be, and the truth was as simple as that. Clear, concise and factual, to the point where it’d be downright stupid to argue with it.

He should’ve burnt those seeds instead of planting them, he should’ve insisted that he didn’t want to have coffee with him, that time after their first meeting together. He should’ve made it clear that he wanted nothing from him. He should’ve never stopped hating him and when his heart began wavering he should’ve fought to push the younger harder and harder away from himself, the more his feelings tried to drag him in deeper. He shouldn’t have let his guard down and given Mingyu the opportunity to swoop in and capture his heart.

Now all he could do was watch it get battered and bruised, black and blue as it burnt, its painful ache becoming his brutal reality.

 

He let go, let the pain grow, let the fire burn and let the salty tears flow. He was suffering now, for his recklessly blind actions in the past and he let himself feel every blow to the heart and stab to the soul, believing that the sooner he let them out, the sooner he’d be able to get back to living again. Blissfully ignorant to the fact that a Kim Mingyu even existed, because his life before him may have been far from ideal but at least it wasn’t as painful as his current tormenting ordeal.

 

Wonwoo took a few shallow breaths, shuddering in his efforts to keep the sniffling to a minimum. There was no internal dialogue of disintegrating monologues, no “eureka” moments or bright ideas. His mind was as blank as a canvas, except instead of it being white and eager to receive and reflect different shades of colour, it was black and simply swallowed and silenced all colours and thoughts.

Mingyu was already entangled in his life, in more ways than one. He couldn’t simply forget and move on, not while they shared an apartment, not while they worked in the same company and certainly not while the younger was treating him like they’d already been married for centuries. Expecting him to stop, was impossible, irrational and cruel to the highest of levels.

Nevertheless, it didn’t mean that Mingyu was up for grabs, nor did it mean he’d continue to let him mess with his heart. He pitied the dully beating organ, it was about time he showed it some mercy. He decided to let his tired heart rest, to put an end to all the abuse and suffering.

 

That’s it. He sighed internally, months of crushing, entertaining possibilities, and indulging in feelings and moments that he shouldn’t have.

They were all over now, whatever they had and whatever it was, and whatever it could’ve been. None of that mattered anymore. Wonwoo ended it all in his head, he’d broken up with the insufferably lovable boy.

Turned his head and hypnotised himself to erase all hints of anything non-platonic that had ever occurred between them. Kim Mingyu and Jeon Wonwoo were just friends from today onwards. No more and no less, no matter how heartbreaking that was. It was all there was to do.

 

Jeon Wonwoo decided he would not remain hung up on a guy that was already romantically invested in another. He was worth more than that, and he was done wasting his time on him. As for their short friendship, he intended to keep it up for as long as he could. But if seeing his “ex-crush” ever got too much for him or if Mingyu began dating another and he couldn’t handle it anymore, then he’d have no choice but to give everything up. But as of now, he felt somewhat confident in his decision. He was cool with being just friends, technically, it’d be no different from what they already have. The only thing that’d change would be Wonwoo’s position and opinion of their interactions and whether they fit within the realm of friendship.

If not, he’d have to step back and make it clear he wasn’t comfortable with that, and if it did, then he’d simply watch on and try his best not to wish for more.

 

Little did he know, this was so much more easier said than done. Mentally, his subconscious prepared him for failure while his confident resolve fuelled his determination to stay strong. Kim Mingyu and Jeon Wonwoo were really going to be just friends now and everything would be okay.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Depressing, I know.  
> ...Sorry?
> 
> I'm working on wrapping this BISH up, plan to have it completed by the end of this month. If not, then I'll kms :D
> 
> Oh, Happy Vallentine's day? Watch 17 on weekly idol, the best thing EVER, imma go rewatch that now BYEEE
> 
> THANKS4Reading<3


	36. Chapter 36

 

A loud crash roused him from slumber, he blinked. Sitting up on the bed, with a long yawn as he stretched till he heard the satisfying clicks and cracks from his bones. His fingers brushing against the cool round surface of the snow globe as he reached to the wire frames on his bedside table. Wearing his glasses, the world suddenly came into focus and he picked up the gift with a silly smile, gently, he shook it, watching the falling snow flakes with the same intent and wonder as yesterday. It really was beautiful.

His throat tightened unexplainably, the word “friends” playing over and over like a crazed mantra. He placed it back down with a pained sigh, only now realising he’d fallen asleep with an earbud. Frowning, he removed the earbud that somehow stayed lodged in his ear as he cried himself to sleep.

 

He cringed, pulling his canary-yellow hood up and rubbing his face, he felt emotionally drained yet strangely empowered. It felt like he was now doing the right thing, after so long. His smile was small, but his heart still wept, bloody tears falling endlessly through its cracks. Wonwoo smiled _still_ , telling himself the pain was only temporary, that he deserved it for dumbly falling for someone who clearly wasn’t interested in him like that.

Another loud crash, followed by muffled cursing. Then footsteps, somewhat rushed and indecisive came closer and closer, until his door opened and a fully dressed Mingyu appeared in the doorway.

Casual suit and slicked back hair, he looked relieved to see him sitting on the bed. ‘Morning hyung... I’m leaving now, but I’ll come get you at around 7 for the ceremony, Okay?’ The younger beamed happily, words rushed as he spoke, Wonwoo nodded, hearing the words but none of them registered with him.

 

Mingyu caught on to his blank expression, ‘You _do_ know what I’m talking about...’

 

Wonwoo frowned, not in the mood for lying. He shook his head and Mingyu sighed, dramatically rolling his eyes with an amused smile, ‘Pledis yearly award ceremony, it’s tonight...’

 

His eyes widened and his chin lifted in major shock, ‘THAT WAS TODAY?!’

 

Mingyu facepalmed, ‘hyung please tell me you at least have something to wear... please, I don’t have time for this.’ Of course he doesn’t, why would he?

Then he remembered the privately tailored suit his father gave him for Christmas and his face brightened unnoticeably. He nodded again, ‘I think I do.’

Mingyu whined, probably at his vague answer. ‘Just be ready by 6:30, we can’t be late.’ The shorter of the two forced back a smile which wasn’t genuine at all, ‘I’ll be ready.’ 

 

Wonwoo thought he was probably just frustrating the hell out of the younger. Clearly, he had somewhere to be on this Sunday, dressed the way he was, it was obvious he was rushing to someone more important than him. Beaming brightly, he turned around and left without so much as a goodbye.

Wonwoo scoffed, offended and a bit irritated, he didn’t ask for his concern, it wasn’t like he was holding him back and forcing him to stay. Why was Mingyu acting like him being late was his fault when all he did was forget about a stupid work event. Mingyu didn’t even have to say anything, it was obvious from his body language how he felt, was he meeting _him_?

 

He closed his eyes, gently shaking his head.

Friends, him and Mingyu were friends. It was none of his business who the younger met or what they did. He kept repeating the same thoughts as he brushed his teeth, washed his face and found (the thankfully freshly pressed) suit with relative ease. Not even sure whether he was in the mood for social activity, _he wasn’t_. But at least the suit was there in case he changed his mind, _he wouldn’t_.

Or maybe he would, he didn’t know. His eyes had been less red and puffy than he expected when he looked in the mirror, probably explained why Mingyu hadn’t noticed. But he was grateful for that, since he didn’t feel like explaining himself at all.

 

The apartment was calm after Mingyu left, the same couldn’t be said for Wonwoo or his aching heart, though. As it screamed out, yearning for the boy it couldn’t have.

 

His thumb hovered over Soonyoung’s contact, debating whether he should call him or not. Knowing that his best friend was most likely still asleep, but he wanted something to distract him from his problems. The phone vibrated before he could decide and he answered with genuine cheer and surprise as he put the phone to his ear.

 

One pleasant phone call later, he’d felt so bored that he dozed off. Sleeping through most of the day, hoping to avoid even the slightest thoughts of his impending doom.

 

When he awoke again at 5:57pm, the first thing he saw was the stylish midnight-blue fitted suit that his father got him for Christmas. He groaned, realising that the award ceremony was very much real and happening in under two hours. It wasn’t a nightmare like he’d hoped, dammit.

As he padded into the living room he wondered why his life had to be so hard. It just wasn’t fair. The silence in the apartment also registered in his lethargic brain but that wasn’t important right now, he didn’t want to go anywhere tonight.

He mumbled curses under his breath as he splayed his lanky limbs on the sofa, then he stared blankly at the ceiling. At the back of his mind, he registered the sound of the front door beeping as it opened and closed. His eyebrows furrowed, as he listened to the footsteps halting near the sofa, followed by a disbelieving groan. He ignored it all, closing his eyes tightly, knowing full well what was about to come.

 

‘OH MY GOD, hyung. I told you to get ready, Why are you still in your pyjamas?!’ Wonwoo rolled into a ball and sighed heavily, Why was Mingyu so stupid? Obviously, the answer was because his hoodies were most comfortable, duh.

 

‘Hyung, if you don’t get dressed NOW, we’re gonna be late.’

 

His voice sounded closer now, he could tell the younger was standing over him by the shadow that fell across his face. Why was he even here? He should’ve stayed with that asshole some more. Why couldn’t he just leave Wonwoo alone, to get over him.

 

‘I don’t care, I don’t even wanna go.’ He murmured into his sleeve miserably.

 

‘WONWOO. STAND. UP.’

 

‘NO. I’m NOT going’, he whined, blindly swatting at the general area of Mingyu’s voice. He managed to hit him twice -albeit lightly, he didn’t have the energy.

 

‘WHY THE HELL NOT?!’ Frustration seeped into the younger’s voice. On any other occasion, he would’ve jumped at the chance to please him. But this was a huge social event they were talking about. Wonwoo was convinced nothing could get him to go -even though he technically should.

 

‘Cuz I HATE strangers, especially the ones that wanna talk to me’, he shivered in disgust, but Mingyu wasn’t giving up yet as he sat down on the single armchair and sighed yet again. Wonwoo opened his left eye to peek at him, the younger had his head down, hands on the sides of his slicked-back hair, looking stressed. It was all because of him, Wonwoo instantly felt worse at the thought.

 

He didn’t know what possessed him to do it. He knew it wasn’t a good idea when he crawled to the edge of the sofa, closer to Mingyu. The latter looking up in mild surprise at his mumbled apology, intense gaze on his face, he failed to find a valid excuse for his non-platonic thoughts.

The voice in his head reminded him to stop, whispering “friends, just friends” but he silenced it. Then Mingyu sighed, leaning back in the armchair and motioning for Wonwoo to come closer, he didn’t know why he obeyed. Maybe it was the intense look, or the general mood or his aching heart, one thing that he knew for certain was that he wasn’t prepared for the series of events that took place, once he did so.

The strong grip on his wrist pulling him down, muscled arms encircling his middle trapping him in place, followed by a quiet hum as Mingyu buried his face in the side of his neck. Wonwoo was sitting sideways in the other’s lap, pupils darting around in shock as his heart drowned in the ocean of nerves created by the younger’s actions. They couldn’t do this, he couldn’t let him do this. He was meant to get over him and this went far beyond a simple friendly gesture. He had to stop him. But how?

He swallowed thickly, blushing crimson at the feel of the firm thighs under him, he didn’t know what to do with his hands or himself. Warm puffs of air hit the sensitive skin on his neck, making it harder to focus on anything as Mingyu started talking.

‘Jisoo-hyung KNOWS you, he’ll be looking for you.’

 

‘I know.’

he sighed pouting, he didn’t want to disappoint his boss but he also really didn’t want to go. He definitely needed to get away from him, though. That’s for sure.

 

‘Your team won’t have a leader without you.’

 

‘I know.’ Disappointment leaked into his tone, it’d be a shame if he wasn’t there to accept on their behalf, in case his department won something. But that was highly unlikely, considering many of the departments did exceptionally well this year.

 

‘It’ll be so boring if you’re not there to brighten the mood.’

 

‘I kn- NO’ He turned to give the younger a warning look, but came face-to face with a smirking Mingyu instead. Their noses were almost touching, Wonwoo could clearly see the small beauty mark on his left cheek and count his long individual lashes at this proximity. He felt his adam’s apple bop as his tongue darted to wet his suddenly dry lips, absentmindedly. Mingyu’s eyes followed the action,

 

‘Stop lying.’ He said in a small voice, dispersing some of the built up tension. Mingyu dropped a wet smooch on his face and Wonwoo’s hand shot up to cradle his own cheek as he gaped in more shock. Fuck, why was he letting this happen? Why couldn’t he speak up and tell him to stop. How the hell was he meant to not have feelings when Mingyu was being like this? The younger’s goofy smile and twinkling eyes, made it impossible for Wonwoo to go through with his complaint.

He could only sit there and watch as the younger hid his face in his chest, suddenly bashful. Wonwoo scowled at the audacity, how dare he be so sexy and cute at the same time. How dare he act this way towards him when he claimed to like someone else, Wonwoo was angry.

But Mingyu’s head right above his frantic heart, was more urgent -What if he can hear how loud it’s beating because of him? he panicked further when Mingyu nuzzled deeper into his hoodie.

Wonwoo paled, his fingers itched to remove him, then came the sweet husky voice, muffled slightly by the thick canary-yellow material of his hoodie.

 

‘I’ll be too upset to even smile, if you don’t come...’

 

Wonwoo shot him a deadpan look, even though the younger couldn’t see it.

 

‘...Cuz I’ll miss you so much.’

 

He froze, that felt sincere and it seared at his already too dazed and distressed heart. He needed to get away, but he could only think of one excuse and he didn’t want to say it at all. He felt the ghost of soft lips where his collarbone met his throat, a gentle brush of lips on hot skin.

Barely even there, but his skin burnt where Mingyu’s lips were and his hyperactive brain picked it up regardless, he panicked and shot up from Mingyu’s lap. The younger looked up at him with a questioning expression, so he rushed to come up with a plausible explanation.

 

‘W-we’re gonna be la-te, remember?’ His voice cracked embarrassingly in between and he stumbled over his own feet as he ran to his bedroom and locked the door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo pulled and tugged at his bow tie in frustration, groaning loudly when he couldn’t get the damn thing to look straight. Through his periphery, he saw Mingyu turn to him with a concerned expression.

‘Eyes on the fucking road, Gyu. It’s already the worst night of my life and I’m not tryna die, for fucks sake.’ He ripped the whole bow tie off and threw it down with an angry huff. He was aware that he might’ve been over-reacting and his actions were way out of character -even in his currently impaired state, that much was obvious. But he didn’t want to go to this stupid event, he skipped the last two years for good reason. Wonwoo hated socialising, especially if it was with strangers in loud crowded places, the stupid uncooperative bow tie was just making his sour mood worse.

‘Hyung, trust me. We’ll be together the whole time and it’ll be over before you know it.’ Unfortunately, Wonwoo did trust him, he really did. But he didn’t want a repeat of earlier, his poor heart couldn’t take it. He had to reinforce the friendship boundaries between them, otherwise it’d be like setting himself up for disaster.

But Mingyu didn’t know how much he hated such events, and although the promise was heartwarming, he wasn’t sure the younger would be able to keep it. Unlike himself, Wonwoo had learnt that Mingyu was the biggest social butterfly ever. He was funny, smart and really good-looking, everyone just wanted a piece of him. There was no way people wouldn’t be swarming around him like flies and whisking him away the moment they went inside.

He glared at the article of clothing in the footwell, cursing the dumb idiot who invented it. In his intense loathing, he failed to notice that the car had stopped and that Mingyu was no longer in the car, until the passenger door opened and the latter was kneeling down, dangerously close to his crotch.

Wonwoo panicked, what the fuck? This is NOT how he imagined his first blowjob with Mingyu to go. Thankfully, it didn’t go anywhere, because he belatedly realised what the younger was doing.

He fought to keep his face neutral as Mingyu straightened back up, long fingers expertly tying the velvety material into a bow. Then those same gentle fingers were smoothing out his styled hair, fixing the stray strands into place. The younger’s gaze was intense and Wonwoo was entranced for a few magical seconds until he looked down, suddenly feeling shy and overwhelmed, as he cursed himself internally for allowing those thoughts and feelings to control his actions again. He was in the middle of studying Mingyu’s shoes wondering how he got them to be this shiny, when he was made to look up by a hand on his chin.

 

‘Are you sure you’ll be okay?’ Mingyu’s eyes were searching his, tone gentle. The brown orbs were twinkling with emotion, unhindered and proud as if Mingyu was allowing him exclusive entry into his mind and soul. Lost in the expressive dark pools of feeling, he didn’t register his lips moving until after he’d spoken the words.

 

‘As long as you stay with me.’

 

But even so, he couldn’t begin to regret the words as the younger’s concerned expression transformed into a goofy grin. He smiled back, hoping he didn’t look as dumb as the younger, then he was being smooched again. Soft plumb lips first on his right cheek, then his left and finally his forehead. Honestly speaking, he had a feeling Mingyu’s strangely affectionate habits would be much harder for him to stop than he initially thought and he was truly terrified.

A ridiculous thought, intruded into his brain. Filling him with an expectant and hopeful emotion, that it’d perhaps lead to something more. It was foreign and definitely had nothing to do with his conscience thoughts. Mingyu and him were friends, why was this so hard? He told him he was crushing on someone for goodness sake. Why was he being so stupid? He needed to talk to him about the excessive skinship if it ever happened again, but he didn’t want to sound weird, aware that friends platonically kissed on the cheek sometimes. He wasn’t comfortable with it though, was Mingyu like this with all his friends? Wonwoo realised he knew none of them so he left the topic for another time.

 

Mingyu chuckled, a soft look on his face as laced their fingers as they made their way into the ceremonial venue. Friends held hands too, right?

Music was playing, not deafeningly loud, but enough to make hearing conversations significantly harder. People, a lot of them, dancing to the slow tunes as they chatted, while drinking and snacking on light refreshments. They were standing in small groups, some people already seated at the round dinner tables. The lighting was dimmed, creating a calmer mood and the decorations were done tastefully. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves, except Jeon Wonwoo.

 

He really thought nothing could convince him to attend such an event, it was the manifestation of everything he despised in life. But getting such special treatment from his cru—friend was an unforeseeable occurrence. It proved enough of an incentive for him to endure this, he felt like he could at least do that with Mingyu by his side. Enjoying himself however, was entirely out of the question, simply an impossibility.

Of course, he was still more than glad today was happening, regardless. At least now he was too anxious about the socialising to be stuck in his head the whole day.

Surprisingly, Mingyu proved to be worth all the pain that came with the one-sided crush and the thought of him being the perfect man solidified in Wonwoo’s mind. Except the thought that he couldn’t have him, ever, was also pretty solid. The younger had kept his promise, sticking by him, throughout dinner and even when others came to greet him. On multiple occasions he feared the younger would get distracted and leave.

 

Like when some of the more determined co-workers approached Mingyu, engaging him in riveting conversations as they ignored Wonwoo’s existence, he truly believed he’d spend the rest of the event alone. But the younger surprised him every time, by randomly putting his arm around him as he dragged him into the conversation or excused himself to hideout with him in a less populated corner where they laughed and whispered to each other.

‘I can’t believe I’m becoming an antisocial idiot like you’ The younger was peeking behind a relatively large potted plant. The wide leaves and dimmed lights able to conceal his giant frame as he squatted beside a pouting Wonwoo.

He playfully poked the pink lips and the older looked away with a shy smile, he felt his blush blossoming and hoped the dim lighting would be enough to conceal the redness.

‘I’m not antisocial.’ He complained but it didn’t sound convincing at all. The taller boy chuckled pulling Wonwoo to his side as he hugged the smaller boy to his tuxedo-clad chest. Honestly though, Wonwoo didn’t think he was antisocial, the word was a tad too strong for his case, too many negative connotations associated with it. He liked to think he was just very selective with whom and when he wanted to speak.

‘We’re literally hiding behind a plant in the corner, because you don’t wanna talk to people. How is that “not antisocial”?’

‘I’m talking to you right now, aren’t I?’ Wonwoo felt the need to defend as he leaned away from the younger watching as the latter sighed lightheartedly,

‘Hyung, that’s different. I don’t qualify as ”people”, we live together.’

‘You’re right, you don’t qualify as “people” cuz you’re my little bitch.’

Mingyu laughed loudly at his words and Wonwoo’s eyes widened in horror as his hand darted to cover the younger’s mouth.

‘Shut the fuck up. They’ll hear us.’ He whisper-yelled panicking.

Mingyu grabbed his hand, holding on to it as he fixed the older with an amused stare, tone disbelieving,

‘And you’re sure you’re NOT antisocial?’

‘I’m not antisocial, Mingyu... just picky’

Just then an announcement rang out in the hall, it was officially time for the award portion of the ceremony to begin. About fucking time, Wonwoo mused mentally. Or so he thought, but realised he’d mumbled the impatient sentence aloud when Mingyu began chuckling uncontrollably beside him.

Wonwoo was pleasantly surprised at the coordinated, comprehensive nature of the award ceremony. There were many categories, some were awarded to whole departments while others were individual. He watched, thoroughly intrigued and entertained as the winners went up on stage one by one, shaking hands with their CEO and describing their happiness and gratitude to the audience after receiving their prize.

He couldn’t see the trophy too clearly from his seat at the back of the crowd, but he could tell it was a pretty pinkish colour. He trusted that Jisoo didn’t skimp out on the quality either. The man himself took to the stage, welcomed with warm applause as he began speaking in a clear voice,

‘Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I hope you’ve had a lovely evening thus far. I’d like to take this opportunity to personally thank you all for your contribution to our growing family, each one of you is special and indispensable. Pledis would not be what it is today, if not for your perseverance and hard work and I hope we continue to climb higher together. With that being said, unfortunately we only have the final two main categories left to announce, Pledis department of the year and employee of the year.’

 

The audience applauded, claps loud and energetic as a buzz of excitement spread throughout the hall, Jisoo’s clear voice resonated through the large space as the employees hushed to listen,

‘As we approach the end of our ceremony, I wish you all a good night and a great year full of success and prosperity ahead. Thank you all for coming tonight, this has been your CEO Hong Joshua, good night.’

The brunette bowed his head briefly, a gesture of gratitude as he stepped back to allow the MC to announce the final two winners. Wonwoo really wasn’t expecting anything, he worked hard and took his job very seriously and he always tried his best to make every day better than the previous one, improving himself and constantly learning. 

Nevertheless, he knew his worth and he also knew that most times effort alone wasn’t enough to prosper in such a competitive world. Some people were naturally gifted whereas others had connections and money that got them further, blowing the likes of Wonwoo out of the water.

 

The first award to be announced was the Pledis department of the year award, which went to the Research & Development team. From what the bubbly MC mentioned, it seemed well deserved too, they had the highest number of overtime hours and least number of errors and corrections in their drafts. Overall, they were a very efficient and passionate bunch.

A short woman that he vaguely remembered seeing around the office stood in the centre, speaking into the microphone as her disbelieving team members stood to her sides. He didn’t catch much of what was being said, she seemed to be choked up with emotion, her teammates supporting her with cheers and hugs as they bowed to the crowd. He clapped along with the rest, taking a sip of Mingyu’s water bottle since he finished his own a while ago and wasn’t bothered to get a new one. 

The younger didn’t seem fazed by it however as he focused on the stage, turning to him with a raised eyebrow and gentle smile, when he felt Wonwoo’s gaze. The latter shook his head, smiling back as he focused his attention on the MC’s words,

 

‘-prestigious award of the night, the grand prize in a sense. One, among all of you hardworking valued employees, will be the owner of that title tonight. In the process of decision making, the panel had somewhat of a tough time trying to figure out why this individual’s consistently excellent results and fiery dedication weren’t noticed and rewarded sooner. A person held in high opinion among the senior staff members for his sizeable contribution to the company’s continued success... ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, I’ll announce the winner.’

Damn, this person sounded like a real workaholic, he felt sorry for whoever it was, he didn’t imagine they had much of a personal life outside the company. He’d hate that.

‘The 2017 employee of the year award goes to... Jeon Wonwoo, Senior Editorial Manager. Congratulations.’

 

He clapped along with the crowd, cluelessly. Despite hearing it all, none of it registered in his brain and he continued to clap in his seat, smiling -just because everyone seemed to be doing that. Except, he realised with a bone chilling shiver that they were all looking in his general direction, he looked down at his hands, was he clapping wrong? Was he too loud? He turned to Mingyu for clarification. Only to be further perplexed by the utterly shocked expression on his handsome face, he slapped him on his cheek -albeit gently- the younger finally snapped out of his gaping transfixion and stood up, pulling a bewildered Wonwoo by the arm and nudging him onto the stage. 

Wonwoo kept looking back at the beaming boy as he ascended the steps, what was happening? Why was he here?

The crowd roared as Jisoo held his hand in a firm handshake, handing him a pretty looking sculpture of sorts. He was beyond confused, but he couldn’t help but admire the pretty colours. A pearly white square base with a plush velvety cushion, supporting a huge, hopefully fake diamond. It was a gentle toned rosy colour, not too loud but calming and composed, blending nicely with the airy, relaxing blueish tone of the cushion. It was very beautiful, his eyes caught on the gold print in the centre of the base. His heart screeched to a halt, how could he have missed that? Carved into the golden plaque was his own name in an artistic scrawl, along with the words that caused his heart to restart, at an alarming speed.

 

“2017 Pledis Employee of the Year, Jeon Wonwoo”

 

He paled, looking into the crowd and catching Mingyu’s gaze, pride was written all over the younger’s face as he clapped and whistled enthusiastically. The other sounds in the room slowly bled into focus, everyone was cheering happily, most people on their feet as they chanted his name while clapping. The MC motioned for the microphone and Wonwoo obliged, dazed. Struggling to comprehend why complete strangers were happy for his success, 

‘Tell us what it’s like to receive such a prestigious award, Wonwoo-ssi’

‘Ummm, are you sure you got the right person?’ The hall filled with giggles and and snickers as the crowd cheered and the applause intensified. The CEO nodded his head in answer and Wonwoo turned back to the microphone, sharing brief eye contact with a creasing Mingyu as he began his impromptu speech,

‘Roughly three years ago, when I gave up my dream to be a writer and began working here, I never even dreamt of such an honour. I didn’t believe I could excel in an area that I had no prior experience in, nor did I think I would ever deserve such a title... it feels so surreal, I can’t even discern dream from reality at this point. I-I can’t believe it...’ he closed his eyes, inhaling deeply through his nose and willing the tears to stay put as he continued in a much more collected tone,

‘I’d like to thank our CEO, the panel that partook in the decision to choose me out of so many amazingly talented, hardworking people...’ he looked straight at Mingyu as he said this, he didn’t know why, the younger’s eyes simply drew him in like a magnet. He looked away with wanton effort and continued,

‘My family and friends whom would be the most delighted at this news and of course my editorial team, they’re a great group of hardworking people and I would’ve never have been able to achieve such success if it weren’t for their amazing support...’ loud cheers rang out in the audience, people hollered and whistled happily, the atmosphere was electric and Wonwoo felt exceptionally elated as he waited for the crowd to calm down,

‘Lastly, I’d like to thank the entire Pledis family and staff by extension. Thank you for giving me such a meaningful award, I’ll continue to work harder and become more deserving of such high praise. Thank you again.’ He bowed a full ninety degrees as his co-workers erupted with cheers, giving him a standing ovation as he stumbled into Mingyu’s arms at the bottom of the stage.

The claps were deafening and the cheers even more so, but his mind was numbed. All he could feel was the warm comforting palm at the small of his back as it led him away from the crowd.


	37. Chapter 37

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As he sat up rubbing the sleep out of his puffy eyes, snippets of his latest dream flashed through his mind’s eye. He closed them, focusing on the fading image of that recurring dream. With a great deal of effort, he managed to salvage the following before the dream slipped through his grasp into the unconscious world.

He’d dreamt of him and Mingyu, which was nothing new, the pair were in his bedroom and on his bed, he had to admit that was a tad strange but still not too bad. In the dream, they seemed to be talking and he might’ve been crying and none of it made sense. But he remembered one sentence clearly “I need to feed my cat.” Not because it was particularly memorable, just beyond strange.

Did Mingyu even have a cat in real life? If he did, then he certainly never mentioned it to him. His dreams were so bloody weird, and he wasn’t particularly worried since he usually forgot about them after a few minutes of being awake, anyway.

 

So considering he’d been up for over nine hours, showered, eaten twice, gotten some work done and finished reading the whole novel which Mingyu gave him, in that time (In fact he loved it so much that he re-read parts of it), so it really made no sense to him that he could recall every little detail of those short snippets from his dream. Down to the precise nature with which Mingyu’s eyebrows furrowed as he made that strange statement.

This time his dream was _different_ , maybe less of a dream than he originally thought. He tilted his head up, brown eyes gazing at a strong tanned jawline, fingers itching to touch, from where he was cuddled into Mingyu’s side on the sofa.

He instantly killed the thought about touching him, then he told himself the cuddling part was fine. Friends totally cuddled while they watched a movie, he wasn’t overstepping any of his boundaries and they were still within the realm of friendship.

 

Wonwoo recalled the events from this morning which led to the present situation, how he’d been attempting to write a short story, one out of many more that he neglected for months and even years as they collected dust in his drafts. Taking advantage of his mellow mood and uplifting buzz brought by the award from the previous night, he forced his mind to relax and hands to press down on the keyboard. The pink diamond sitting atop the velvety almost-lilac cushion, was displayed proudly on his bookcase. Wonwoo found himself fighting back grins every time he caught a glimpse of it out of the corner of his eye.

It was still difficult for him to believe that it actually belonged to him and even harder for him to accept that people thought he deserved it. Nevertheless, he was more than proud of his achievement, his family and friends showering him with endless love and heartfelt messages of congratulations, when an excited Mingyu forced him to announce the news to almost everyone in his contact list. Including ones he hadn’t contacted since middle school, but Mingyu was looking at him with beady eyes like he was on the verge of tears, beaming at him with unrestrained joy and genuine happiness _for_ him.

The younger could sell all his belongings and major organs as well as burn his life savings and Wonwoo still _wouldn’t_ stop him, if it meant having that bright grin directed at him.

 

Mingyu and him had gone out for some fresh air after he stumbled off stage, since Wonwoo's brain was entirely drunk on the situation. The events that unfolded the moment his name was spoken, making him feel lightheaded and very unfocused.

So they ended up sitting on the steps outside the large venue, nothing but the muted hum of conversation from inside and their calm breathing filling the silence.

They just sat silently, Mingyu seemingly stunned himself, as he stared at the ground. Their thighs were touching from their closeness and Wonwoo should’ve pulled away but he was too dazed to realise or even care and Mingyu was... Well, he was _Mingyu_.

The older of the pair had his neck craned staring up at the dark sky, a solitary bright star fighting the lonely battle of illuminating the night. Subconsciously, he waited for reality to finally sink in, the fresh chilly breeze helped a little, it had a strangely warmer undertone to it and he was grateful since neither of them had their jackets.

Mingyu sighed beside him and Wonwoo felt the younger’s body sag, head leaning on Wonwoo’s shoulder. He stiffened, eyes widening marginally. The first thing that came to his head after he was done freaking out was “is this platonic?” He thought it could be, but at the same time his heart fluttered in excitement and a hopeful bud bloomed in his chest, tiny and shy.

It dawned on him that him _feeling_ the way he did about Mingyu was the issue, the younger could simply sneeze and Wonwoo would physically have to restrain himself from cooing and hugging the living daylights out of him. His whole plan of living solely on a diet of friendly gestures and rejecting anything that went beyond, seemed suddenly too complicated and elaborate.

Not as black and white as he’d wrongly assumed, but a whole grey area, full of danger and uncertainty.

 

Honestly, he didn’t know what to do anymore. Wonwoo was drained from the day’s arduous activities, social events just had a way of sucking all the energy out of him, leaving him a dried corpse that crumbled easily under the slightest strain. Physically, he struggled to keep his body from shutting down on him as his fatigued brain complained of the huge emotional burden caused by the award as well as the copious amount of unwanted attention, he just felt that it was all unwarranted and the dreamlike reality suddenly had a nightmarish undertone. 

 

 

He was fed up with counting calories and wasn’t in the mood to observe this self-imposed diet from hell. So he sighed just as Mingyu had and rested his head on top of the younger’s who in turn hummed contentedly and snuggled into him, arms loosely wrapping around his waist. He felt warm and the tension slowly seeped out of his bones.

Wonwoo might’ve been fully aware of his actions in that moment, he knew this would only hurt him in the end, yet he turned his head and pecked Mingyu’s temple.

Heart raging when the younger looked at him with a gaping mouth and awe reflected in his deep irises, ‘thank you, Mingyu.’ He whispered, words packed full of sincerity since he honestly hadn’t a clue how he would’ve survived the night without him.

Mingyu hugged him then, squeezing his shoulders and squishing him tightly to his chest, it was a bit uncomfortable due to their position since they were both seated, but Wonwoo couldn’t even think of a single place he’d rather be.

His heart stuttered in fear, realising once again just how attached he’d grown to the younger boy, he exhaled a shuddering breath, Mingyu’s palm rubbing soothing circles on his back. Why wasn’t Wonwoo pulling away? Why was he still so damn hung up on Mingyu? The same boy that’d told him himself, that he loved another.

Wasn’t that a clear enough indication of Mingyu’s heart? That it lay with someone else and wasn’t up for grabs. He pulled away and ignoring the younger’s questioning gaze, he walked off aimlessly through the dark streets. His throat clogged up with raw emotion and he deliberately balled his hands into fists, stuffing them in his pockets when Mingyu made a move to hold them. He couldn’t allow that, not while he knew it would go _no_ where. Mingyu didn’t like him _that_ way.

 

It felt like a slap to the face, like he wasn’t even allowed to entertain the idea nor dream of the possibility of them ever being more than just friends. He glared at the younger’s gentle smile as he wished him a goodnight back in their apartment, remained frozen while Mingyu hugged him briefly, a flash of quickly concealed worry and a tight pout later, and he was gone. Wonwoo sighed, whole body deflating in relief once he was safely behind his closed bedroom door. Was he wrong to not hug him back? Friends hugged all the time, but his heart ached in his chest and moisture surfaced to his face, he blinked the tears away and cocooned himself under his blankets.

 

Sleep came, _eventually_. But so did the tears that he'd fought so hard to restrain, his eyes red and puffy when he woke up earlier than usual on Saturday morning.

Not enough sleep collected, yet unable to force himself to get any more, he decided to try and write something for lack of anything better to do but also because writing had always been a way for him to lose touch with reality and feel fulfilled and satisfied with himself. God knows, how much he needed that right now.

 

Except, that didn't seem to be the case at all, his writer's block was as stubborn as ever and he had no idea what the hell he was doing. The almost blank word document seemingly mocking him, despite it being open for the last four hours he'd hardly managed to write more than 600 words and the frustration was close to suffocating him, he needed a break.

Wonwoo sighed, spinning around slowly in his chair, the faint sunlight seeping through his curtains bathing the room in a warm glow and gleaming on the surface of the pink diamond.

Wonwoo beamed despite himself, staring in disbelief and awe at the award right in the centre of the bookcase, next to his silver medal in jui-jitsu that he’d acquired in a tournament back in the first year of high school. Why and how did it belong to him?

 

He’d been typing away on his computer, the keys drumming an off-beat rhythm as he allowed his fingers to transfer the random words straight from his uninspired brain. Then he just stopped, stood up and left his room for the first time since waking up.

 

Scowling and overthinking the storyline in his head, he didn't realise the boy standing in front of him, until he'd walked right into his open arms. He squealed in shock and jumped away, but strong arms caged him in and if it weren't for the familiar scent and the bubbly laughter, he would've thought he was being kidnapped. Still, he forcibly tore away from his embrace, trying really hard to ignore the flash of hurt and confusion on the younger's face.

Wonwoo _did_ feel bad, but he told himself it was best for the both of them. He needed to get over the boy that didn't want him and Mingyu needed to try harder with _his_ crush.

Because as much he hated the "asshole" there was nothing he wanted more than Mingyu's happiness, going as far as putting it before his own.

 

But Mingyu was Mingyu, always hyper and hardly discouraged, he kept following him around like a lost puppy, clinging to Wonwoo as he swallowed down his breakfast and did the washing up. Mingyu kept whining in his ear, and generally being annoyingly affectionate, so he gave in.

Wonwoo couldn't even blame himself for that. 

He remembered the smile that he failed to keep in check, the one that made Mingyu beam and nuzzle his neck, the one that made him unable to reject the younger's affectionate gestures, because Mingyu _knew_ he liked it.

 

 

 

 

 

Earlier they’d agreed to watch some sci-fi movie when the younger complained about being bored.

Frankly, Wonwoo didn’t enjoy it too much, only 10% of his energy invested into the movie, while the majority of the remaining 90% was used to both keep his cool and think about the cat dream. The latter of the two reasons being the main factor in him still being here.

Now though, with his head in Mingyu’s chest and the younger’s arm around him, while their lower halves were covered in a blanket, he discovered a new reason to stay put. Convincing himself, that he would’ve done this with all his other friends, it wasn’t his love for Mingyu but his love for cuddles and he successfully managed to delude himself, for now. 

Wonwoo couldn’t even recall exactly how they’d ended up in this position but he could accurately testify that they started on opposite sides of the 3-seater sofa. An invisible magnetic field, maybe? Who knows, all he knew was that he’d have to be more careful.

 

Mingyu appeared to be fully engrossed in the unrealistic storyline and Wonwoo simply watched him for a while. Eyebrows furrowed, and lips pursed in thought, he wondered whether he should mention the dream, since it was at least the 4th time he’d seen the same thing in less than a week. Could it all have been a coincidence? For some reason, he didn’t think so.

And thus, he was faced with a dilemma, it could well turn out to be nothing at all, but he didn’t know that yet, so he believed he had every right to be as anxious about this, as he was.

_Do I bite the bullet and potentially look crazy, or allow this crazier dream to mess with my head?_ It’s not like Mingyu doesn’t know how messed up you are, anyway, his brain supplied unhelpfully.

 

Oh what the hell. Fuck it,

‘Hey Gyu?...’

 

Mingyu hummed in response, shoving an inhuman fistful of popcorn in his mouth. Wonwoo swallowed, sitting up straight, pausing the movie and just going for it. No point beating around the bush, right? Right.

 

‘Do you have a pet cat?’

The younger choked, coughing aggressively, then gulping down half the coke bottle. Bits of the chewed-up white snack floating in the brown liquid as he set it back down, Wonwoo grimaced in disgust.

Mingyu cleared his throat, looking just as terrified as he sounded, when he finally stuttered, ‘Hyung, you... remember?’

Wonwoo however, was too excited knowing that his dream had some truth to it, to even notice the younger’s uncharacteristically nervous reaction.

 

‘So it _was_ real! I knew it... cuz usually when I dream of you, they don’t feel as real. But th-’ Mingyu’s smug grin was sudden and unsettling, Wonwoo’s words died on his tongue at the younger’s expression.

_Shit_ , he hated not being able to control his big mouth. ‘I- did I say... dream?’ He stuttered with a grimace, Mingyu nodded slowly, expression morphing into a cocky smirk.

‘Well, I meant nightmares?’ He tilted his head, unsure as his voice rose an octave towards the end.

 

‘Are you asking me or telling me?’ He copied the head tilt except he was doing it in the opposite direction, Wonwoo huffed, embarrassed -until he remembered the cat.

‘Why a cat?’

Mingyu’s eyes widened, ‘W-wha- Oh, right! the cat?... ummm’ sheepish smile faltering as he scratched at the back of his neck. There was only one word to describe this Mingyu, flustered.

 

Wonwoo raised an eyebrow, his thoughts muddled in a puddle of confusion. Flustered Mingyu, was _not_ something that happened often, the confident, charismatic boy hardly let anything crack his cool. So all this over a cat? That didn’t make much sense.

It was obvious that whatever this cat story entailed, Mingyu wasn’t eager to let him know.

Wonwoo didn’t care though, in fact the younger’s reaction intrigued him so much he _wanted_ to know. He wouldn’t let him get away with it, whatever “it” was, he had to find out.

 

They maintained eye contact, Mingyu’s irises appeared a bit more blown out than usual, a stream of uncertainty and doubtfulness flowing through them as they searched his own. 

Wonwoo frowned, ‘Why were you here anyway? It must’ve been before you moved in, but I don’t remember much, and I mean if you _had_ to lie to me about a pet...’ he knew he was rambling by this point, but he was just so disoriented at the revelation. He took a deep breath, looked at him pointedly to convey that he didn’t have to lie to him, just in case the sarcasm didn’t make it obvious enough. ‘... why choose a _cat_?’

Mingyu was blushing, hard.

Naturally the older, scooted closer to the taller boy, viewing the rare spectacle up-close, just some friendly banter he told himself, it’d be a crime _not_ to.

The younger inconspicuously moved away, head bowed but Wonwoo noticed and moved even closer. Forcing the other boy to the edge of the sofa, no escape, as he was squished between the armrest and Wonwoo.

It was amusing to watch how the tables have turned, whatever warranted such a shocking reaction must be pretty shocking itself, he was simultaneously excited and dreading to find out.

 

Mingyu visibly gulped, ‘I was... looking at your face-’

Wonwoo leaned back and the younger seemed less tense, was he making him feel uncomfortable? He had to remind himself that Mingyu didn’t like him like that,

‘You were looking at my face? What’s that got to do with anything?’ He probably would’ve understood if he let the boy finish, but it was such an absurd confession that he couldn’t just keep quiet.

‘Hyung, haven’t you ever looked in the mirror and felt at least a bit feline-y?’

What the fuck? The younger sounded serious too, so Wonwoo’s “what the fuck” expression intensified, he was just so confused. ‘No, why would I?’

Mingyu looked shocked by his answer,

‘Not even once? Like a fox or cat or cheetah or something?...’ Wonwoo shook his head, then something clicked,

‘Are you tryna say I _look_ like a cat?’ He lowered his voice, unintentionally leaning closer as he enquired teasingly 

‘Yes.’ The younger mumbled sheepishly, looking away, then he continued in a shy tone, ‘I was looking at you and you looked so much like an adorable kitten in that moment, so it just came out.’

‘Kitten? Wow, my masculinity is wounded. I’m not man enough to even be a cat?’ He was only half-joking because seriously a kitten? That was insulting(ly cute), he frowned and Mingyu rushed to explain himself.

‘No, it’s just that you were being really cute that night. You even wore your clothes wrong, so I had to help and then you grabbed onto me, not letting me leave so I...’ his voice trailed off, eyes widening marginally when they met Wonwoo’s, as if he’d said too much.

And maybe he has.

 

‘Mingyu, why would I ever do that?... are you making this up? cuz if you are then you should totally be an actor or something. You almost had me fooled.’ He laughed nervously, hitting the younger a bit harder than intended because why was he looking so confused and thoughtful instead of laughing along.

‘Hyung, you were kinda very drunk. You don’t remember that?’ Mingyu was silently watching him for a while after that, Wonwoo was aware that he was gaping, but that couldn’t be, he’d only gotten drunk _once_ since meeting Mingyu, when he'd went out with his friends just before everyone went back home for the holidays, and he didn’t recall any of that night.

But if the younger knows about him being drunk, then it must be true that he was there at some point, or he wouldn’t know, right? But _why_? 

Mingyu was silently worrying his lips and he found himself having to rip his eyes away. Friends, we’re friends.

This whole scenario was disconcerting, his heart thumped loudly, he was scared now.

 

‘So you had to lie about having a cat? So I would let you leave?’ He finished the younger’s earlier sentence for him. It sounded silly, a grown man, _him_. Was he really that dumb and clingy as a drunk, he got his answer the very next second in the form of a small nod.

Wonwoo face-palmed, groaning out loud as he stared blankly at the ceiling.

Why did he have to be such a blackout drunk? And how the hell was Mingyu there? He definitely didn’t come along, eyebrows scrunched in concentration, didn’t Jeonghan bring him home? He should’ve asked him yesterday when they spoke on the phone. Dammit.

 

So Mingyu was the one that made sure he stayed alive that night. For some reason the idea wasn’t that far fetched and actually it explained why he woke up feeling less suicidal than he should’ve that one Friday morning. The thought of Mingyu taking care of him, warmed his heart and he sighed in content. He had really good taste in ~~men~~ friends, but he wished he wasn’t such a dumb blackout drunk, he wanted to actually remember, not just imagine it. Then a thought suddenly popped up and since they were having honesty-hour, he thought “meh, might as well.” 

‘I knew it was too good to be Jeonghan’s cooking, I didn’t believe it for a second.’

‘Your friend?’ His right cheek was puffed up like a chipmunk with popcorn and his gaze was questioning, so cutely confused. He wanted to bite him, but held back the cannibalistic thought.

‘No. I mean yeah, but about the porridge. It tasted great... It was you, right?’

Mingyu nodded once, biting his lip as he shied away from Wonwoo’s gaze. Call him crazy but Mingyu was acting real weird today, like a kid getting caught stealing from the cookie jar. What was he hiding?

 

‘How’d that whole thing happen, anyway?’ Curiosity got the better of him and he faced the younger with his whole body. Legs crossed in front of him, knees touching the side of Mingyu’s muscled thigh.

‘You really don’t remember?’

Wonwoo shook his head, he really didn’t. The tiny snippets he salvaged weren’t credible, since he wasn’t even sure what was real and what was imagined.

‘But don’t think it’s okay to lie, just cuz I won’t be able to call you out on it.’ He warned with a hard look, Mingyu put both his hands up, palms facing forward in the universal “I promise, I’m safe” gesture. Wonwoo nodded for him to speak and Mingyu took a deep breath, clearly more nervous than usual,

‘You called me actually, it was pretty late, around 3am I think...’ he _did_ remember calling someone, but he’d thought it was Soonyoung, strange. ‘Something just felt different. And you weren’t answering any questions, you kept giggling and some of the things you said were just... so unlike _you_.’ His face scrunched up adorably as he recalled that fateful Thursday night/Friday morning.

‘How so?’ He had a feeling it’d be embarrassing, but he had no recollection of that night and he just wanted to know.

‘Like first of all you were being _super_ cute, then saying cringe-y things like...’ he paused, unsure as he glanced at Wonwoo.

‘Like?’ He encouraged expectantly, ‘you kept saying how you l-loved my voice a-and ummm... that you liked it when I called you “Wonwoo”.’

 

Well, one thing was for sure. Drunk Wonwoo was brutally honest, he laughed awkwardly, ‘I mean that IS my name so...’ he tried to offset some of the awkwardness, regretting having asked in the first place.

‘I know, but you kinda only wanted me to say it _without_ the “hyung” though... so I’ve been meaning to ask. You know, since we’re already on the subject. Ummm... do you... have some kind of anti-honorific kink?’ Wonwoo blinked, once, then twice. Very slowly, controlling his facial muscles, erasing all signs of a reaction.

Silence and cold stares were his answer, while on the inside, chaos ensued. His inner organs were getting all emotional, unable to decipher why such a personal, non-platonic question was being asked so innocently. He was also struggling to comprehend how the younger knew him so well. Despite the confusion and inner turmoil he kept his indifferent facade, but Mingyu was unfazed, staring right back, mischief with a hint of curiosity swimming in his eyes.

Behaviours like this were simply unacceptable, he had to nip it in the bud before it became a thing.

‘No.’ His deep voice took on a very serious tone, face deadpan and gaze strong. ‘Just carry on with the story.’ Wonwoo huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Mingyu looked away then, getting back into the story -albeit begrudgingly.

‘So yeah, you literally blacked-out on me, and I umm, found you passed out on the street so I brought you home.’

‘Why does it feel like you’re skipping over a lot of important details?’

‘I am. But details are sooo boring hyung, let’s just get back to the movie’ Wonwoo snatched the remote from the coffee table before the younger got to it, stuffing it down the collar of his burgundy hoodie for safekeeping, Mingyu gaped at him and he smiled sweetly at the shocked boy. ‘Wha-’

 

‘Listen here, Gyu. I decide what’s boring. _You_ just tell me everything.’ He interrupted sternly. Honestly though, he doubted it could get much worse, he might as well hear the whole thing.

‘What do you wanna know?’ The younger asked after a short pause, eyes shut as he faced upwards.

‘ _Every_ thing.’

 

He sighed, realising how serious Wonwoo was, 'Ask and I’ll answer, then.’

‘Okay. So how did you know where to find me?’

Mingyu sat up straighter, still not facing Wonwoo as he answered quietly, ‘I asked your friend?’

 

‘You don’t know my friends.’ Wonwoo stated, deadpan.

 

The younger stuttered, probably not expecting the harsh tone. ‘I-I knew one of their n-names. Kwon Soonyoung, you told me before.’

‘So?... It’s a name. Not a number.’ He stated matter-of-factly.

‘I found him on Instagram.’ Wonwoo tilted his head in confusion and Mingyu added, ‘your picture was on his profile, so I dm-ed him and he told me where you were at last...’ his mouth formed a small “o”, he could’ve sworn he told Soonyoung to change that picture, but since when did the now purple-haired boy listen to him.

‘I figured you wouldn’t have managed to get that far in your drunk state, so I ran around the area for a bit, while constantly calling you... the light from your phone kinda helped me find you.’ He finished as he picked lint off of Wonwoo’s hoodie sleeve. When the fuck did the younger’s sneaky hands get here? He screw-faced the tanned hands in his lap.

 

‘you were super heavy, you know?’ He looked up, meeting the younger’s amused eyes, Mingyu was chuckling slightly.

His heart fluttered, both at the revelation that this kind-hearted giant went to such measures to look out for him and also the general adorableness of Kim Mingyu,

‘You carried me?’ He said tilting his head with a small smile.

‘I kinda had no choice, you were basically dead weight.’ Strangely, he felt warmth instead of taking offence and smiled to show it.

He wanted to hear more, ‘What happened when we got here? -actually, who did the code?’

‘ _You_ did.’ There was barely a pause, as the younger forcefully blurted out the answer. Strange, Why was he suddenly being so forceful? It wasn’t like Wonwoo accused him of anything.

He remembered how the younger entered the code, all by himself the night he'd moved in and how weird and creepy that was, so he voiced his next question. ‘Is that how you knew?’

‘Huh?’

‘Well, the night you moved in, you kinda did it all on your own and I was seriously creeped out by that. I thought you remembered from the _first_ night you stayed over.’ He explained patiently.

‘Oh.’ The younger looked like he didn’t know what else to say,

‘Yeah.’ Apparently, nor did he. This time Wonwoo was the first one to look away from the intensity of those chocolatey brown orbs.

 

 

Then he cleared his throat, he still had many more questions that needed answering, ‘Then we got here. Then what?’

 

‘You changed and went to bed.’ Bullshit. If it was that simple why was Mingyu blushing and looking away all shy again.

He bit back a smile, because as much as he didn’t appreciate being kept in the dark, he couldn’t deny how freaking cute Mingyu was being. How was he supposed to _not_ want him when he was being like this? 

‘Is this the part where you helped me wear my clothes the right way? And I refused to let you leave, so you lied about needing to feed a cat?’

Mingyu sighed, rubbing his face with both of his palms, ‘Am I ever gonna hear the end of this?’

‘Never.’ Then, Wonwoo pursed his lips, observing the younger’s strange behaviour as Mingyu squirmed under his gaze,

‘Mingyu, what happened after the cat part?’

‘You went to sleep and I went home. _The end_... Now stop asking questions and let’s watch the freaking movie.’

They both simultaneously looked down to Wonwoo's chest where the remote was chilling and Mingyu bit his lip, eyes focused on his hoodie-clad chest, he felt naked under the intense gaze.

‘Gyu?’ He called, wide puppy eyes focusing on him as got the boy’s attention, ‘You promised you wouldn’t lie.’

‘I’m not lying.’ He mumbled, looking away again.

‘You said you’d tell me everything.’

‘I _did_ tell you everythi-’

‘Then, why can’t you hold my gaze for longer than a second? _I’m_ supposed to be the antisocial one here. Also, please kindly explain why you’re blushing redder than a fucking tomato?’ He didn’t know what Mingyu wanted him to _not_ know so badly, but curiosity and determination were two of Wonwoo’s greatest assets. He wouldn’t give up easily.

 

Mingyu pouted, blushing deeper as he whined, ‘Hyung, you literally blush all the time.’

‘EXACTLY. _I_ blush, not _you_. Which means you’re hiding something.’

He resolved to taking random guesses, the younger, sighing, grimacing and chuckling at them,

'Did I throw up on you?'

'No, thank god for that.'

'Did I pick my nose and wipe it on your back?'

'Hyung! Why would you even...' Wonwoo simply shrugs at Mingyu's disbelieving expression, he'd done it to Soonyoung and his other friends before. 

'Did I ugly-cry on you and get snot all over your shirt?' he laughed at the image in his own head, completely frozen in shock when Mingyu suddenly looked sheepish, 'Wait! I _did_?'

'I wouldn't exactly call it ugly...'

'But it happened? Why? did you accidentally drop me or something?' He didn't get it, why would he do that?

‘Hyung, please stop. I beg you.’ Mingyu was being sincere. Instead of making the older stop, however, it just served to make him more curious. Because what was so important that the confident, cocky boy was begging him. 

‘I wanna know, though.’ He _really_ did.

‘You don’t wanna know. Trust me, you do _not_.’ Mingyu grabbed both of his hands in his own, squeezing them with a pleading expression.

 

Wonwoo scowled ripping his hands away, ‘Why do you keep making decisions for me? I want to know, Mingyu. _Tell me_.’ He demanded in a firm tone.

‘No.’ The younger answered confidently, tone firmer.

‘Fine... don’t bother talking to me until you wanna tell me, then.’ The remote fell on the carpet with a soft thud as he stood up to leave and he scowled deeper at the device, barely holding back the urge to stamp on it. Instead he turned around, huffing dramatically as he made his way to his bedroom and locked the door.

Ignoring Mingyu’s whines and calls for him the whole time, let’s see how long he lasts, he mused evilly. Then he sat at his desk, got into the zone and pulled up his story, continuing the laborious writing/editing process.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find me on twitter @Taeskimono  
> Thanks for reading & I'll be back on Wednesday with more of THAT.  
> Let me know what you think, it helps me know what I'm good at & what I need to work on. I appreciate yall <3


	38. Chapter 38

The next morning, he got ready for work silently, avoiding any encounters with the younger boy. He was taking this “no talking” thing seriously and wanted to minimise the number of times they bumped into each other, just to make his life a little bit easier. But apparently, the universe had other ideas.  
  
Mingyu walked into the kitchen, humming a familiar tune and greeting Wonwoo a good morning as he did every morning. Wonwoo was lost, torn between answering or following through with this extreme method of self-torture. The younger turned to him, leaning back against the counter, looking effortlessly gorgeous as he did every day, Wonwoo gulped, stealing glances inconspicuously.

The cuffs of Mingyu’s silk cream-coloured dress shirt was rolled up, exposing his muscled, veiny forearms. The shiny material strained against his bulging biceps as he crossed his arms, hair falling in dewy waves around his clear sun kissed face. A sneaky peak of his golden skin and sexy collarbones as the first two buttons were left undone, no doubt purposefully. Compared to the impressive shirt, the trousers weren’t as difficult to digest, just a simple well-fitted pair of black slacks. He gulped again, chiding himself to think platonically while wondering how the younger managed to always pull everything off so well, meanwhile the latter was busy pouting at Wonwoo. And the older boy was having a very hard time controlling and managing his reaction, he wanted to smile and coo, say something snarky and probably end up blushing when Mingyu hugged him. In reality he bit the inside of cheek, turned back to his food and kept up his expressionless facade.  
Wonwoo was proud of his self-control but he had a feeling it wouldn’t last that long. How on earth did he think it was a good idea to try and ignore or resist him? Was it even possible?   
  
‘You’re seriously doing this?... Ignoring me, just because I don’t wanna tell you?’  
  
Silence.  
  
‘Hyung, are you two years old?’  
  
More silence.  
  
‘Fine.’ He huffed, turning around and walking to his room, ‘be like that.’  
  
Wonwoo sighed in relief at the younger’s retreating figure. Good, now all he had to do was keep it up till he was safely behind the frosted glass and wooden door of his office. He’d be safe there.  
  
The ride to work was tense and awkward, made even more uncomfortable by the unfamiliarity of the situation. They were always talking, bickering, passively flirting and just always having fun. But Wonwoo wasn’t too concerned, he chose to give him the cold shoulder, it was only a matter of time before the younger cracked and told him exactly what happened that night -or morning, rather. At least he hoped that’s what would happen.

 

 

 

  
He leaned back in his office chair, finally sending the final draft of his presentation to the boss, it wasn’t the middle of March -barely the middle of January, actually. But he hated letting things pile up, he’d rather get the important stuff out of the way. With a clearer mind he began sifting through the thick stack of paperwork on his desk. Speaking of not letting things pile up, he might’ve ignored the non-urgent work from the previous week, but only because the presentation was more important.  
  
A quick check of the time told him he had roughly an hour to complete it. He didn’t think it was possible but he’d try, he could always finish after lunch, anyway. There was no real rush, and lunch itself depended on whether Mingyu decided to come. Wonwoo realised with a deep scowl and a mourning heart that he had no right to be sad, he was the one that initiated the cold treatment, after all. He could only hope Mingyu was feeling just as bad as he was, hopefully worse.  
Although, he doubted that last thought, he was still trying to hypnotise himself into thinking his feelings were quenched. All the while convincing himself that he could stay friends with Mingyu. Maybe them not talking as much is a good thing, maybe he’ll get over him quicker this way. Maybe he would be o- his new phone vibrated and his eyes drifted to the glowing device,  
  
**-Are you interested in lunch?**  
 **-Or you wanna keep acting like a baby?**  
 **1:39pm**  
  
The impulse to fight back was stronger than his resolve to ignore. He reasoned that he wasn’t technically “talking” to him, just texting so it wasn’t all bad.

  
  
**-Fuck off.**  
 **1:41pm**

**-AND he speaks**  
 **-I’m not mean enough to let you starve**  
 **-I care about you**  
 **-So come eat something**  
 **1:42pm**  
  
Why was he trying to seduce him, he didn’t appreciate that. Wonwoo would stay strong, there was no point caving now, not when he’d come this far.  
  
**-please**  
 **1:43pm**  
  
With that being said, the offer was _still_ very tempting. He _was_ feeling hungry, it _was_ only lunch and the younger even said “please”. He’d be an awful _friend_  if he refused that. They were _definitely_ friends.

  
  
**-K.**  
 **1:47pm**

 

 

  
  
Hushed whispers followed him all the way to Mingyu’s office, it didn’t help that it was lunch time and everyone knew his face now, from the award night. He cheesed at the memory, still in mild disbelief.  
  
Wonwoo didn’t miss the way the younger’s eyes lit up upon his entry, realising he was still smiling, he quickly wiped it off. Clearing his throat and scowling at the wall instead.  
  
He heard Mingyu sigh, ‘seriously?’  
  
Silence. Wonwoo internally praised himself, he was getting pretty good at this.  
  
Halfway through their silent meal, Mingyu huffed loudly, throwing his chopsticks on the table as he slumped against the leather, three-seater sofa.  
  
Wonwoo startled, genuinely surprised at the younger’s actions since he’d been too busy enjoying the yummy food to notice the build-up to his breakdown.  
  
He blinked at him, confused. Mingyu pulled at his own hair, almost screaming in frustration. ‘I _don't_ wanna tell you.’  
  
Wonwoo blinked, his mouth full of food, he swallowed then spoke slowly, ‘I left that choice to you, I’m not the one freaking out.’ Wonwoo remained passive in every way, voice, face he even managed to continue eating. Although now, he was very much aware of the stressed giant by his side.  
  
‘I knooow. But you literally won’t talk to me, you’re sitting right here but I feel like you’re miles away... I miss you, Wonwoo.’  
  
Fuck. Men couldn’t endure this, it was too much. Wonwoo thought he must be a superhero of some sort, because he fought to remain calm, indifferent -despite his clenched jaw and tingling fingers.  
  
‘Does this normally work for you?’ He asked calmly, too calmly for the storm that was currently brewing within him.  
  
‘Does what work?’ He could tell the younger was confused by his tone, but he wasn’t looking at him so he couldn’t be too sure.  
  
‘Seducing others, to get your way?’ He finally turned to the younger, crossing his arms after he put the chopsticks down.  
  
Mingyu’s eyes widened and his tanned cheeks had a visible red tinge to them as he violently shook his head, stuttering. ‘I d-didn’t, wasn’t seducing, I promise.’  
  
He couldn’t believe his misfortune, Mingyu really was a clueless flirt and so damn cute. Scowling, he looked the young boy directly in the eyes.  
  
‘Listen, are you gonna talk? Or shall I leave? I don’t fancy wasting my time, I’ve actually got things to do.’ He wasn’t even lying this time, he had a stack of paperwork waiting for him in his office.  
  
Mingyu looked thoughtful for a few seconds, ‘you really wanna know?’  
  
‘Yes.’  
  
‘Promise me something first.’  
  
‘No.’  
  
‘Please, I’m trying to compromise with you here, stop being difficult.’ The younger begged,  
  
He thought for a minute, deciding to hear what the younger wanted first, before refusing. He nodded, signalling for Mingyu to talk,  
  
‘Promise you won’t ignore me, or freak out on me or hit me when I tell you.’  
  
‘If it’s bad enough to warrant such a reaction from me, then I don’t want to promise that. I’d like to maintain the right to punch you in the nose, just in case you deserve it.’  
  
Mingyu gnawed at his bottom lip and Wonwoo was about to tell him to stop when the younger spoke up before he could.  
  
‘It’s not something I did...’ his voice was tentative, testing the waters.  
  
Wonwoo didn’t understand. ‘Then why would you make me promise not to ignore and hit you?’  
  
‘Because I was sober when it happened... because you don’t even remember.’ He added hesitantly, a hint of sadness laced into his words, he sounded like he was not yet sure whether he wanted to carry on.  
  
The younger exhaled heavily sitting up and leaning his elbows on his knees, something changed in his aura and he chuckled bitterly, hands clasped before him.  
  
‘Which is brutally ironic because it wasn’t even me that did it, yet I can’t forget.’  
  
Mingyu looked up at the last word and their gazes clashed, Wonwoo got drawn in, losing himself in their depths. A sea of emotion was brewing in his darkened brown eyes, determination, intrigue and hope were all flashing in his expressive eyes. But Wonwoo caught a flash of something else, concealed so quickly that he wasn’t able to identify it. He didn’t miss the hint of fear either, he shivered. Not least because, a large amount of Mingyu’s emotions were undoubtedly mirrored in his own eyes but also because of the way those eyes were looking at him.  
  
The way he focused on him with such undivided attention, gaze cold yet tender in its harshness, peering deeply into his soul and searching restlessly. It made him feel like a scientific specimen being studied under a microscope on the highest magnification setting. The unblinking brown orbs were radiating warmth beyond the initial coldness and they roused an inexplicably intense feeling within him. The strange, yet unsurprising fact was that, Wonwoo didn’t hate it. He should.  
  
That didn’t mean he was strong enough to continue the intense staring contest, so he looked away.  
  
‘W-was it something I did?’ Mingyu’s reply was a curt nod.  
  
Wonwoo nodded back slowly, he’d been fighting to find out since yesterday. Yet suddenly, he wasn’t so sure he wanted to know anymore.  
  
‘I wasn’t even gonna tell you, but you uhm... you kissed me.’  
The statement registered embarrassingly slowly and when it did, a huge weight settled on his head, crushing his entire being. He struggled to breathe, grappling for purchase,  
  
‘O-on the l-lips?’ His voice cracked,  
  
Mingyu nodded, ‘you were fighting me, wanting to do it again...’  
  
‘Did I d-do it again?’ There was a noticeable tremor in his voice as he hid his face in his palms, red with mortification and shame. Was this it for them? Would he have to let Mingyu go? How were they supposed to stay friends when his drunk self caused that much damage?  
  
‘No... I made you a promise and you finally went to sleep.’ He couldn’t believe how calm Mingyu was being about this whole situation, unlike himself. Granted, he couldn’t see his face but at least his voice was cool and composed. Probably had something to do with the fact that Mingyu already liked someone else and didn’t appreciate getting kissed by Wonwoo.  
  
‘Do I even wanna know what it was?’ He was beginning to feel the onset of a migraine as he asked in a tiny voice, after a short while.  
  
‘Probably not. Imma tell you anyway... what’s the point in trying to hide it, now?’  
  
He gulped, waiting with bated breath. Face still covered in his palms.  
  
‘I promised you’d be able to kiss me as much as you wanted in the morning.’  
  
The older boy gasped, face turning impossibly redder, that made no sense. He peeked through his fingers at Mingyu to find the latter smiling, but it was bittersweet,  
‘Why would you even promise something like that?’  
  
‘I dunno...’ the younger shrugged, a brilliant smile overtaking his handsome face, but it was faltering with uncertainty,  
  
‘... it just felt like the right thing to say in that moment.’  
  
He couldn’t even begin to conceal his shock at that. His heart shattered and he felt on the verge of tears, he didn’t even understand why. Shouldn’t he be happy hearing this? Isn’t this what he wanted all along? To kiss Mingyu.  
  
But certain thoughts kept nagging him, he realised that his inability to rejoice at the heartfelt confession was because of Mingyu’s sad tone. The young boy sounded hopeless, like he’d hit rock bottom and couldn’t find his way back up again. Depressed and defeated, it didn’t suit him at all and he struggled to understand why Mingyu was being like this. Sure the younger liked someone else, but was kissing Wonwoo so repulsive that he had to look and sound so upset?  
  
‘You don’t sound too happy...’  
  
Mingyu scoffed, sweeping his hair back.  
  
‘Hyung, remember New Year’s Day at the Han river?’ He wasn’t sure why the younger was bringing up their picnic under the starless skies but he nodded anyway so Mingyu took that as his cue and carried on,  
‘Remember that friend I told you about?’

Wonwoo scowled, ‘the asshole?’ How could he forget? That devil was the main reason Wonwoo was trying to get over his crush, quite unsuccessful in that endeavour so far, but he’d keep going.  
  
Mingyu face-palmed and Wonwoo gave him a very judgemental look, was this kid a psycho.

The younger groaned, hand rubbing down his stressed face, ‘Seriously? Are you for real, hyung?’  
  
Mingyu was the one that literally facepalmed, ‘Shouldn’t I be asking you that?’  
  
‘I can’t do this right now. Please just go away.’ He buried his face in his palms, looking sad and drained.   
  
Wonwoo’s immediate answer was “No.” Not that he voiced it, because he had a crucial question that he wanted ask at the moment, “what did any of this mean, and did you really hate kissing me that much?” But he couldn’t, so he stayed silent.  
  
But his brain was always loud, leading him to thinking down a spiralling staircase, did this mean Mingyu didn’t like the “kiss”? He really did only see them as friends. Tears pricked at the back of his eyes, Why was he suddenly bringing up his asshole of a crush? Just to be mean and remind him that he had someone he wanted to kiss and news flash it’s not you.  
Was Mingyu even gay? Why was he only considering that now? Surely, he should’ve known by now. Of course, the fact that Mingyu himself admitted to having a crush on that asshole was enough to be certain of his sexuality but Wonwoo wasn’t thinking clearly at the moment. Then, why was Mingyu so saddened by the idea of kissing him? Was Wonwoo really that repulsive? He was stuck, couldn’t seem to get out of his head nor convince himself to think any differently.  
‘Are we friends?’  
  
‘Yes.’ The younger’s voice was just as small as his own, but his answer wasn’t a no. Wonwoo needed to get over him and fast, because it was obvious he’d only get hurt. But instead of calmly nodding back and forcing a smile, he found himself getting irrationally angered by the whole situation.  
  
‘Yes?’  
Mingyu nodded, still not looking up and Wonwoo was enraged.  
‘Friends.’ He spat bitterly, ‘you should’ve told me sooner since we’re JUST friends, right?’ His sarcasm tended to be less detectable when he was fighting back a range of intense emotions, namely heartache and rage at himself.   
  
‘Do you have any idea how hard it was for me, I couldn’t tell you even if I tried. Every time I looked at you I’d remember how I’m the only one who even remembers that.’  
  
‘Well if it was that hard, then maybe you shouldn’t have moved in with me.’ He knew it was harsh but he was blinded by his emotions at this point and they were more blind than his terrible vision.  
  
Somewhere in the back of his mind, he regretted it instantly upon hearing the broken voice of the younger mumble in agreement. ‘Yeah, maybe I shouldn’t have moved in with you, hyung.’  
  
But that part of him was distant and detached, at the forefront of his brain was his anger at himself and disappointment in Mingyu. Although, he had no right to be, he still was.  
  
Did that mean Mingyu was regretting it, would he move out?   
  
He had a feeling that this was only the beginning and that he didn’t even start to feel the extent of his true heartache yet. He had no idea he’d meant so little to the other, it appeared Mingyu did an incredible job in deluding him so far.  
  
He stormed out of Mingyu’s office, the latter not even trying to stop him and took the bus back to their apartment after grabbing some things from his own office, for several reasons. Firstly, he knew he’d get nothing done there, knowing Mingyu could come to his office at any given moment. Secondly, he really didn’t fancy going home with him later, simply thinking of the boy intensified his raw emotions, he couldn’t handle sitting next to him while feeling this way, it would suffocate him and not in a good way. Lastly, he felt safer back here behind his locked bedroom door. Where no one would see him cry and he could wallow in the pain and discomfort brought on by his broken heart, undisturbed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  
Despite having gone to bed early, his brain refused to switch off for the night. Bombarding him with constant Mingyu-related anxiety inducing thoughts. So it’s safe to say, he woke up feeling like absolute shit.  
  
He was half dead as he dragged himself around the apartment getting ready for work, kept his eyes shut while his heart had a seizure in his chest throughout the silent drive to work. He was extra harsh on the other staff and lost his temper over tiny errors, then he locked his office and tried to nap throughout lunch. Waking up almost at the end of the work day. What did he even expect? Naps didn’t work for people who were hungry, sleep deprived and heartbroken.  
  
Again, he took the bus home. Deliberately ignoring his phone the whole day. He didn’t want to know what he’d missed, he wanted to be alone more than anything. Some time later he heard the front door open and familiar footsteps padding around the apartment. After ten minutes of nervously biting his lips and literally sitting on the edge of his seat, he decided to give up. Mingyu wasn’t coming to him. Mingyu didn’t care about him. Mingyu was probably getting ready to move out already.  
  
White, hot, angry tears boiled behind his eyelids, he couldn’t sleep again. Anger and disbelief that the younger would so simply up and leave, over something like that. It was just ludicrous, he didn’t think Mingyu was _that_ shallow of a person. But he was done crying over it now, he wanted the pain to go away and he wanted to sleep.

**-Am I repulsive?**   
**20:56pm**

Wonwoo wasn’t even given the time to question why he sent that, when Soonyoung replied a mere few seconds later. But as he stared at his own words, he realised that he’d been thinking it all along, why else would Mingyu hate him otherwise?

**-Of course NOT**   
**-Are you ok, Won?**   
**20:56pm**

No, I’m in pain. Physical, emotional, mental, I’m not ok at all. The quick reply was anything _but_ reassuring, knowing that his friend meant well did very little to console or convince him. Mingyu found him repulsive, or at least the thought of kissing him. A fresh wave of pure agony seized his being, a few stray tears falling from his eyes, yet he lied in answer.

**-I’m fine.**   
**-How the fuck did you answer so fast?**   
**20:57pm**

**-I was on my phone, what’s up?**   
**20:57pm**

**-I feel like shit.**   
**20:58pm**

There, he’d said it. There was no going back now. He wiped at his wet cheeks and put on his glasses, sitting up in bed. Soonyoung was definitely going to drill every last detail out of him.

**-I’m gonna call you**   
**20:58pm**

**INCOMING CALL**   
**K.SOONY**

The words flashed on the screen in his dark room and he let it ring.

**-WONWOO YOU’RE SCARING ME**   
**-PICK UP THE PHONE.**   
**20:59pm**

He appreciated that Soonyoung was only concerned but it only served to make him feel worse about himself. Knowing his best friend was worried for him, he didn’t mean to cause him unnecessary stress. But he needed to get away from his self-destructive thoughts, he didn’t want a repeat of his miserable college days. He wanted to leave his depression in the past, where it belonged. But every second spent crying in the darkness of his room and every second spent deep in his thoughts were only dragging his demons closer to the surface.

**-I’m coming over to yours now**   
**21:03pm**

**-I’m waiting.**   
**-You know I’m always here for you right.**   
**21:04pm**

**-I know.**   
**21:07pm**

He typed the final message just as he reached for his bedroom door, unlocking it and stepping outside while he slipped the phone in the pocket of his pyjama bottoms.

By sheer luck or ill-fate, Mingyu also walked out of his room at that exact moment and they stared at each other in the dimly lit hallway. Then Wonwoo looked away and walked to the front door, what was he waiting for? Mingyu hated him now.

The younger’s tone was so unlike him when he asked, ‘Where you going?’ Tentative and unsure,

Wonwoo sighed deeply, wishing he could’ve avoided this confrontation.

‘Soonyoung’s.’ He bit his lip not looking back as he finished tying the laces and stood back up.

‘Like _that_?’ He knew the younger was referring to his clothing choice, since he was in pyjamas. ‘I’m warm.’ he lied, knowing he'd freeze out there, but he didn't care.

‘Have you looked at the time?’ His voice sounded sceptic and very concerned. He didn’t like what that was doing to his heart. Why did Mingyu care anyway?

‘That doesn’t matter to me.’

 

Mingyu sighed, ‘At least put on a coat...’

Wonwoo barely held himself back from snapping, teeth grinding in ill-concealed frustration, ‘I _said_ I’m warm.’  
He heard some shuffling and Mingyu’s voice sounded a lot closer the next time he spoke, ‘Why’re you so mad at me?’

He swallowed thickly and clenched his fists in the pocket of his hoodie ‘Why don’t you ask yourself that?’ The younger let out a pained groan and he felt the warmth of his body hovering behind him, close enough to touch him but he didn’t. Mingyu didn’t _want_ to hug him, his heart ached.

The taller boy huffed behind him.

" _Great_ " Wonwoo thought sarcastically, now he made him angry as well, ‘You think I haven’t? I nearly got into an accident today because of you.’ Wonwoo’s eyes widened at Mingyu's words, neck cracking with the force of his turn. His heart beating incredibly fast as he looked over the younger’s body frantically, ‘Are you okay?’ He was sure he looked and sounded every part as crazed as he felt, unable to hold back at the thought of Mingyu getting hurt.

Confusion flashed in the younger’s eyes, transferring that same emotion to Wonwoo, and when he spoke up his voice was softer, ‘I’m fine, hyung. I braked before I hit the truck.’

‘That’s... good...’ Wonwoo looked away, feeling relieved to know the younger wasn’t physically hurt, yet incredibly embarrassed at his outburst. He cleared his throat,

He had a feeling he shouldn’t ask his next question, he should leave and come back with a clearer head, but the words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them, ‘Why- why was it because of me?’

Wonwoo looked at him expectantly, he didn’t even know what he wanted to hear, he just wanted them to be on good terms again. ‘You weren’t in your office, your phone was off, you didn’t even tell me anything... I was worried.’

“ _Worried?_ ” His brain scoffed, what right did he have to be worried, maybe Wonwoo was being a tad dramatic. Sure, they were _friends_ and friends worried about each other occasionally, but they were both grown men and it’s barely been a few hours since they last saw each other.

Therefore, Wonwoo was certain the younger’s reaction was completely unwarranted, and the genuine concern in Mingyu’s eyes as he looked at him was confusing his brain cells halfway to death.

‘Do I have a reason to tell you anything?’ His tone was much harsher than he intended.

Mingyu sounded broken, ‘Hyung...’ Wonwoo turned his head away from the younger’s pleading gaze, he was just so upset and he was making Mingyu upset and none of this was helping, so he cut him off, letting his storm of emotions take over,

‘I don’t have to tell you anything, Mingyu... I’m sorry you had to go through that and I’m sorry I kissed you, even though kissing really isn’t a big deal... but I regret it deeply a-and I really hope we can... we can s-stay good friends.’ Most of his words were lies, said more so to convince himself rather than for Mingyu’s sake, but he tried his best to _mean_ them.

From his tone he gathered Mingyu was holding back emotion, be it anger, sadness, frustration or a mixture. He didn't know, he couldn't see his face, but he heard it in his voice, something heavy and hurt, ‘How can you regret what you don’t remember?’ He wasn’t sure whether Mingyu was upset that he was dismissing their kiss or angry for the same reason.

He tried to answer the way a friend would and the words sounded _much_ better in his head. ‘I’d regret it even more if I remembered.’ He couldn’t take them back once they were out, despite it being completely untrue.

Fire was burning in the younger’s gaze, scalding and bright. When he looked at him, he felt like he was melting at the intensity, ‘Hyung, is it _really_ no big deal to you? You do that with your other friends too?’

The older didn’t want to answer that, and he wasn’t obliged to answer, not least because he had no idea _how_ to answer without making things worse. But also because he didn’t owe him an explanation, his brain supplied him with one, “ _I was drunk, shit happened, get over it._ ”

Instead his voice mumbled, ‘I need to go.’ And he turned around, reaching for the door handle.

Until a strong yet gentle grip clasped onto his other wrist, he didn’t need to look to know how upset he’d made the younger, especially because Mingyu's voice cracked and he sounded like he might cry, ‘Wonwoo, wait...’

Wonwoo didn't wait, he opened the door and stepped outside,  
‘Will you come back?’ The younger sounded devastated and Wonwoo couldn’t understand. Why he was acting like _this_ , like he _cared_ , like he _wanted_ him to stay.

It made no sense, why would Mingyu feel that way about him, when he already had someone that he liked?  
He ripped his wrist free and let the door close in the younger’s face, then he speed-walked to the stairs since the elevator usually took forever to come and the last thing he wanted was for Mingyu to catch him waiting.

His heart constricted and contorted painfully in his chest at the thought of him, the confusion and sadness making him feel dazed and slightly faint. Wonwoo almost collapsed into Soonyoung’s arms at the other’s doorstep, eyes red with frozen tears, and on the verge of slipping into hypothermia. He hadn’t even realised he’d been crying on the way here, until Soonyoung mentioned it. He was too down and dazed to notice or even care, so he allowed his friend to fuss over him and tried to enjoy the comfort of the familiar boy's hug.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  
_**MINGYU’s POV** _

The electronic lock beeped as the door slammed shut, he stared down at his hand where the other’s wrist had been just a moment prior. Wonwoo was gone.

Blinking the tears away, he paced around their living room, pulling at his own hair and debating what he should do. Going after him wasn’t an option, he didn’t know what to say to make things better, but staying here and doing nothing wasn’t good either. He shouldn’t have told him about the kiss, he should’ve lied and taken it with him to the grave. Clearly, the kiss was the issue, they were fine until he told him.

Mingyu sighed, the sound as hopeless as his heart, he’d always been optimistic and chosen to see the positives in every situation, but this thing with Wonwoo really crushed the light out of him. He’d barely slept the last few nights and coming to terms with the fact that Wonwoo didn’t want him back was devastating to say the least.

They’d been so happy before, the older boy always let Mingyu hug him and kiss his cheeks and play with his hair, he used to smile so brightly up at him and hum happily as he fed him and let him hold his hand while they walked. He'd always blush so cutely and stare so fondly, he wanted to believe _that_ meant more. So what changed?

Mingyu didn't even need to figure that one out, the answer was obvious. He'd stupidly mistaken the signs of friendship and trust for something else, making Wonwoo feel uncomfortable with his words and actions. But it all came down to that drunken kiss, Wonwoo was right in a way. A kiss hardly meant much in this day and age, especially since the older boy was clearly completely drunk. Telling Wonwoo that they'd kissed was definitely the biggest mistake he'd ever made since having his heart stolen by the boy. But he was blinded by love and he was getting tired of waiting, especially since Wonwoo didn't seem to be taking the hints. Or maybe he didn't _want_ to take the hints? 

He really thought they had a chance, like Wonwoo was trying to conceal his emotions when he felt the same way. Mingyu thought that for a long time and at some point he started to believe it too. His delusion led him to almost confessing that night at the park, but Wonwoo _still_ didn’t get it. Despite the wanton hints he’d dropped to gauge the older’s reaction, none of it seemed to work the way he _wanted_. His failed attempts ate away at his self-confidence and he grew wary and unsure, it forced him to accept Wonwoo’s blatant rejection for what it was, the cold, hard truth.

A stray tear ran down his hot cheek and he dabbed at the wetness absentmindedly, staring down at his phone where his thumb hovered over _his_ number. The picture they took together the night of the award, him beaming at the camera while Wonwoo frowned at him. He used to smile at this picture, now he just felt like crying at the handsome face, it seemed to be taunting him and he locked his phone to stop seeing it.

But he couldn't stop seeing him even as he closed his eyes, his asshole crush, flatmate, co-worker and close friend, Jeon Wonwoo kept frowning at him in his mind.

He wished he could call him _his_ to love and to hold, but maybe it was time to put his feelings aside, it didn’t seem like Wonwoo was appreciating his advances.

_Of course,_ it would mean giving up on them being more than just friends, but if things continued the way they were then he was set to lose him entirely.

Before he could realise the full impact of his conclusion, his phone started ringing and vibrating in his palms. Loud and uncontrollable, much like his heart as it called for _him_. He stared blankly at the contact name, why was he calling him? His eyebrows furrowed in confusion but he cleared his throat, answering anyway.

‘Hello?...' He heard shuffling, a surprised gasp, almost like he didn't expect him to pick up.

Mingyu was confused and the uncertainty leaked into his tone as he asked, 'Soonyoung?’

Then his ear popped at the loud volume that greeted him, ‘HI, YEAH, THE ONE AND ONLY, THAT'S ME...' grimacing, he moved the phone away from his ear,  'Mingyu, right?’ the last part was added in a normal voice, but considering how loud the greeting was, it probably felt more like a whisper to Soonyoung. He couldn't imagine how his Wonwoo and him came to be friends, they seemed so different already.

‘Yes.’ suddenly, his mind was racing with thoughts and his brain was filling up with unanswered questions, was Wonwoo okay? was he cold? did he eat? did he get there safely? did he hate him? Thankfully, some of his questions were answered without him having to ask them. Soonyoung must've said it to fill the elongated silence between them,

‘Wonwoo’s fine, he’s with me... in case you’re wondering.’ He sighed in relief. Tension, which he didn’t even know he had seeping out of him, it made breathing a lot easier. And them more silence, since he really had no clue why this phone call was _even_ happening.

‘... As his best friend I think it’s my duty to ask this...’ Mingyu's heart began thumping loudly in his chest and he straightened his back, throat suddenly dry as he listened carefully,

‘Who is this _asshole drunk_ Wonwoo keeps crying about? The one you said you liked, Jihoon, my boyfriend, thinks it’s Wonwoo... Do you have a crush on my best friend?’ The more Soonyoung spoke the more dazed he felt, the sound seemed like it was echoing from miles away, yet he heard the words clearly. He opened his mouth to say something, anything. His lips opening and closing, gaping like a fish out of water, until _some_ thing finally fell through, but the three words that came out, had them both gasping in shock.

And the line went _so_ silent after that, he feared it was dead.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘I love him...’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii, I never know what to write here. Thanks Tina <3  
> I wuv you all & I hope you like & I'll be back on Friday with more MEANIEEEEEEEEEEEEE
> 
>  
> 
> You can find me on twitter @Taeskimono  
> Thank youuu & Godbye :D


	39. Chapter 39

 

‘ _I love him..._ ’

 

Mingyu sighed once the words finally left his mouth. For the very first time in all the months he’s known _him,_ all the times that he'd nearly blurted the words out and all the times that he'd held back and they decided _now_ is the right time. The only other person who knew of his crush was Minghao, but even _he_ didn’t know how deep his feelings ran for Jeon Wonwoo.

It was like his heart had known it all along, loved Wonwoo secretly for _much_ longer than he was even aware. So when he finally realised it, he couldn’t help but love the beautiful boy even more.

To Mingyu, love didn’t have to be complicated, he was the type that always listened to his heart and followed it blindly. But Wonwoo was special, _he_ showed no interest in him from the beginning, almost hated him at one point. He thought forcing a relationship at that stage would completely ruin his chances, he thought that if he took his time, befriended the boy and got to know him, then getting rejected would be less likely.

Instead, he’d grown too comfortable, Wonwoo _did_ warm up to him if only slowly, but Mingyu couldn’t seem to get out of his comfort zone.

Where he held Wonwoo’s lithe body in his arms and kissed his milky skin and inhaled his intoxicating scent as he nuzzled his neck. The place where he gazed into his foxy eyes and received his gentle smiles and felt his warmth as he held his soft hands.

Mingyu didn’t want to risk any of that, it was a subconscious decision and he was happy enough being just _that_ with him, that he’d somehow never really committed to the idea of confessing his true feelings.

But he’d done it now, sure it wasn’t the boy that his heart belonged to who was hearing the confession, but it was a start and he could only hope his momentary bravery would change things.

 

Soonyoung spoke up after what felt like an entirety spent in silence, ‘You _love_ him? As in romantically!?’

Mingyu didn’t even hesitate to answer, ‘Yes.’

Soonyoung gasped, sounding shocked, ‘Fuck, how long?’

‘I think I loved him from the very beginning, when he accused me of robbing his position in front of tens of other employees.’ Mingyu smiled at the memory, how hot the boy looked as he narrowed his eyes menacingly, how his deep voice visited him in his dreams, resulting in him waking up hot and needing more time in the shower.

He closed his eyes to stop thinking and cleared his throat, ‘But if you’re asking how long I’ve _known_ , then the answer would be since our first non-date date at the Italian place.’

 

Wonwoo was so powerful in his eyes. Everything the boy said or did, immediately getting amplified and elevated by his brain, prioritising him before his own self, without even knowing he was doing it. He hung off his every word and tried his very best to please him in everything. His love growing by the day and he lived thoughtlessly, too caught up in the happiness of the sweet moments they shared.

Looking back on it, he thinks it would’ve been a better idea to confess his feelings from the beginning. That if he was going to get rejected either way, then he’d rather live _not_ knowing what it felt like to lock lips with the boy or receive his warmth and gentle smiles.

Soonyoung’s cursing dragged him out of his depressing internal monologue.

 

‘Shit, duuude... shouldn’t you be telling Wonwoo this shit? The dickhead thinks you’re in love with someone else, he wants to _give_ you up on you because of him.’

 

Mingyu was confused, his eyebrows furrowed and his heart beating out of time, ‘But I’m _not_ in love with anyone else and he can’t give me up, that would imply that Wonwoo also has feelin...’ he stopped the train of verbalised thought, eyes widening at the words that almost left his mouth.

Was it wrong of him to be hopeful again?

Could it be that Soonyoung was genuinely helping them figure things out? Did Wonwoo really li-

 

‘YES, MORON. Finish that thought, you’re right.’ He grimaced at the volume, heart galloping frantically like a horse escaping battle. In his daze, he hadn’t even realised what the other had called him.

‘I can’t be...’ he regretted his words instantly, and his ear took the brunt of his punishment, ‘FINISH IT, FOR FUCKS SAKE’

 

So he took a deep breath, his lungs filling with oxygen and his heart swelling with suppressed emotion, his confused mental state and hopeful excitement mingling and he was screaming into the phone, before he could even consider controlling his volume, ‘WONWOO ALSO HAS FEELINGS FOR ME?!?’

 

‘Shit. Calm the fuck down, what the fuck? My fucking ear just popped.’

The ample swearing, sobered him up a bit and he _did_ calm down. But only enough to get a bit sidetracked and confront the boy of the abuse _he'd_ suffered. ‘You’re saying that as if I haven’t suffered of the same thing because of you...’

 

‘Don’t try me kid, or I’ll hurt your Wonwoo.’ His tone was dark and dangerous, but Mingyu almost snorted because he couldn’t take it seriously. His heart fluttered and bloomed at the words though. “My Wonwoo” His giddy brain mused, he’d do anything to make that statement true.

 

‘You wouldn’t hurt him, he’s your best friend before he’s my-‘ his mind rushed to find a suitable word, “friend” felt underwhelming and “lover” felt too much like jumping to conclusions, he wasn’t sure whether to trust Soonyoung so he left his sentence hanging. Clearly someone didn’t appreciate that,

‘ _Your_ what?... finish the fucking sentence.’

 

‘Sorry, I- Are you sure he likes me?’ He wasn’t even sure why _he_ was apologising, Soonyoung was the rude one here, but he had more important things to deal with.

 

‘I’ll let you stir fry my penis and feed it to Wonwoo’s dead goldfish if I’m wrong.’ Mingyu choked, coughing frantically as his spit went the wrong way, he hit his chest to ease the discomfort, his throat and eyes burned. But instead of asking if he was dying, this is what Soonyoung said,

‘Stop fucking about, what are you gonna do?’ He wasn’t sure whether he liked Wonwoo’s friend or wanted to torture him painfully to a slow death.

 

He cleared his throat, voice wobbling and unsteady, probably the aftermath of his coughing fit or the nerves that erupted at the thought of confessing to _him_ , ‘I-I guess I tell him?’

Soonyoung sighed, heavy and exaggerated, ‘THANK FUCK, I’m sending him home to you, right now... Wonwoo’s a fucking idiot so I’ll personally murder you if you mess this up.’

‘Wait, what?’ Soonyoung sounded exasperated, Mingyu thought they weren’t on the same page at all. Send Wonwoo why? He wasn’t _ready_ yet?

 

‘You’re both dumber than I thought... Lord give me strength...’ there was a bit of silence, then an ear splitting scream, like Soonyoung had opened a window for the sole purpose of screaming, he felt sorry for the neighbours. Then, his voice sounded a lot clearer, like he’d put the phone back to his ear again.

‘Listen, You love Wonwoo and he loves you too, it’s _not_ rocket science... Fucking _date_ him and suck his dick. I though you went to Harvard, you thick piece of lard.’ A bit of shuffling then the yelling stopped all together. The line was dead, Soonyoung hung up on him.

 

But that was the least of his concerns. Because apparently, Jeon Wonwoo liked him, he _liked_ him back? His _own_ crush _liked_ him back, Wonwoo wanted him _too_. He flopped on the couch, faceplanting into the dirty cushions, he should probably get it cleaned. But _Jeon Wonwoo_ liked him, he squealed into the couch, long limbs flailing like a 12-year-old girl who just got asked out by her crush.

Which actually, wasn't too dissimilar to his situation, Mingyu pulled up the picture from the award night again, then he squealed some more, embarrassingly high-pitched and loud, when their faces came on the screen.

Zooming in on the frowning boy’s face, he cheesed uncontrollably and kissed it. Then he remembered Vernon’s words from a few days ago, "hyung, did you know your phone has more germs than a toilet seat?" He closed his eyes, shook his head but he couldn’t get the image of him kissing a toilet seat out of his head.

Mingyu rushed to the bathroom to brush his teeth, smile stretching his lips the whole night. _Until_ it neared midnight and there was _still_  no sign of Wonwoo, that's when he started to worry a bit.

But Soonyoung said he’d send him home, so where was here? More importantly, how was he going to tell Wonwoo what Soonyoung told him, should he even mention the boy? Mingyu frowned, Wonwoo liked him too, that much was known now.

But Wonwoo thought Mingyu liked “asshole” which _is_ Wonwoo. But Wonwoo doesn’t _know_ that, a bitter chuckle escaped his lips, it was just so tragically sad.

Both of them were so deluded in what they believed to be the truth, that they didn’t bother looking for alternative theories, this whole mess could’ve been avoided simply, if they had communicated better. He noted that down for future reference, then a genius idea struck him and a smug smile appeared at the thought.

According to Soonyoung they were both in love with each other, he believed that, it made sense. But he wanted to be sure, mess around with Wonwoo for a bit, let _him_ figure out who the asshole is.

In hindsight, he’d be more sceptical of following through with such a ludicrous idea, but it sounded so good to him in _that_ moment that he didn’t bother to slow down and think of the consequences. At least he didn’t need to hold back now, knowing his feelings were reciprocated.

Mingyu exited the presentation he’d been writing without saving it, he would come to regret it later but right now he was too excited to even notice, mood electrified. He scrolled through his phone, a silly smile on his face as he tried to distract his eager and slightly nervous brain while he swivelled around in his desk chair.

 

 

 

 

**MINGYU’S POV END**

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There was one thing he’d done well and a _lot of_  ever since storming out of his apartment, cold, heartbroken and stupid. And that was _cry_.

 

Wonwoo cried and cried and cried, and Soonyoung held him comfortingly, until he didn’t anymore. Wonwoo continued crying even after that, about how hard it is to try to get over Mingyu, about the asshole that Mingyu loves, about how much he wants to be an asshole, so Mingyu can love him back.

He was a mess, it was no wonder Soonyoung left. But when he came back a while later, glaring at his phone and mumbling profanities, something seemed different.

‘Go back home.’ Soonyoung crossed his arms as he spoke.

Wonwoo blanched, he didn’t want to do that, he wasn’t ready. ‘ _What_? Why?! You said I could stay over tonight.’

‘You can’t. Jihoon and I are fucking ALLLLLL night.’ There was only one word to describe the expression on Soonyoung’s face. Evil.

He couldn’t possibly stay after hearing such disturbing plans, especially after Soonyoung proceeded to bring out all his toys and explain how they were used, shameless in his words as if it was a perfectly _normal_ thing to do.

It wasn’t, the cackling boy had managed to shove a coat on Wonwoo before he ran out of there, traumatised and completely shocked at the things Soonyoung put up his ass for pleasure? He shivered and shook the thought away.

 

Instead, his mind filled with a different type of disturbing thought. He let them run through his mind, walking around the block seemingly endlessly until he had some idea on what to do. Wonwoo didn’t _once_ look at the time as he did all that, he didn’t want to know how much precious sleep he was losing by walking around in the freezing cold. He knew he _had_ to go back home, but he at least wanted a plan of action, he’d suffocate if Mingyu looked at him like he did when he left him, like he'd killed his family and burnt his dog, so dejected and down. The image brought tears to the surface of his eyes.

Soonyoung’s “advice” kept circling in his brain, “ _It’s just a kiss, Won. Remember how they made us kiss in middle school for a dare?... we’re still besties now. So don’t use that as an excuse to stop being friends, plus you were drunk just... just tell him to grow a pair and stop being a wuss._ ” He remembered glaring at him and hitting his big useless head, and then how Soonyoung complained and cursed as he left the room, only to come back much later, telling him to essentially _get lost_.

 

Apparently, kissing was no big deal. He’d said those exact words to _him_ as well, but he wasn’t sure if he believed that. Wonwoo began to walk back home, footsteps heavy on the concrete and heart even heavier in his chest. He was dreading what he was about to do, but it was Soonyoung’s final “advice” to him, Wonwoo wouldn’t even think of doing it if he weren’t so desperate to fix things between them.

Fists clenched, gaze intent and body frozen from the cold, he marched into their apartment. He wasn’t even fazed by the silence that greeted him, he was determined to implement his best friend’s advice even if Mingyu was already asleep.

 

 

 

  

On the way back here, Wonwoo had decided that the previous nights of lost sleep was enough, it was _just_ a kiss, for fucks sake. They were adults, why was Mingyu overreacting? As if kissing was a big deal.

Even if it _was_ a big deal, was it _really_ worth losing their friendship over? He didn’t think so. And honestly, if Mingyu _seriously_ considered moving out because of that, then he would gladly hold the door open for him. He’d be there to watch him walk out of his life and eventually be reduced to an insignificant memory sometime down the line. He didn’t need someone who didn’t value and respect _him_ for _him_. A cowardly idiot who’d throw their budding friendship out the window and over what? A _tiny_ drunken kiss. No, thank you.

 

Marching over to the younger’s door, he barged straight through, not even bothering to knock. In his determination, he hadn’t even noticed the tears that began reflowing, but Mingyu did.

The younger’s face switched from a bored frown to an alarmed expression, hilariously fast.

‘Hyung, why’re you crying? What’s wrong?’ He ran over to him, tone worried and frantic while his face was the picture of concern.

Wonwoo flinched unintentionally, as the younger held his face gingerly, wiping the tears and searching his eyes.

 

He looked away feeling utterly flabbergasted. Mingyu’s actions making Wonwoo internally question whether the younger was severely schizophrenic, the fact somehow slipping by unnoticed, until _now_.

How could he change from “We’re friends and you kissed me, so I hate you” to _this_ , literally in the span of a few hours. It made no sense.

 

‘We’re friends.’ Wonwoo repeated the words from their disastrous conversation a few nights ago. He’d meant for it to sound like a firm statement but his wavering tone suggested it was a question.

Mingyu nodded slowly, ‘Yes, you and I are _totally_ friends. But Wonw-’

He removed the younger’s hands, taking a step back as he cut him off, ‘And you’re gonna end that over a tiny kiss?’

Mingyu sighed, running his tanned fingers through his own hair, looking majorly stressed out, but Wonwoo was too high strung and emotional to notice the faint smile and the mischievous glint in the younger’s eyes, ‘Hyung, you’re only saying it like that cuz you can’t remember.’

That was a fair point and Mingyu couldn’t be blamed for not liking him romantically. Feelings were strange, they shouldn’t be forced on others. But Mingyu seemed like the type to put weight behind insignificant things and treat them like life-changing events. He’d have to somehow prove that kissing was no big deal, people kissed all the time and it _meant_  nothing.

Sadly, there was only one way for him to do that -at least his brain convinced him it was the only way, Soonyoung’s way.

 

‘Gyu, kissing really isn’t a big deal. And you know I was drunk, why can’t you just get over it?’

‘ _I_ wasn’t drunk, it’s not that easy for _me_.’ Mingyu looked away fighting a smile that the older couldn’t see, and Wonwoo took a deep breath, closing the gap between their bodies. Mingyu looked up with a confused expression, then Wonwoo was planting a close-lipped kiss on the shocked younger. The taller immediately stumbled back, eyes wide and mouth covered with a tanned hand.

 

‘ _See_? no big deal. It’s just a kiss and you’re not a 12-year-old girl, so get over it.’ He barely managed to force out the words as he maintained a sense of false cheer and nonchalance. Not waiting to hear the younger’s reply, he turned on his heel with an indifferent shrug and went back to his room.

Praying that Mingyu would believe the utter crap he was spewing and praying that he wouldn’t regret going through with Soonyoung’s dumb idea. Then he locked his door and slid down the white surface, feeling the grooves of the wood on his back even through his thick black hoodie.

He pulled the hood up and lowered his head on his knees, which were drawn to his chest and then he let it all go. All the pent-up emotions of frustration, anger, heartache, mortification, helplessness and a great dose of fear came rolling out of him, in the form of silent tears. The heart wrenching type, that left him hiccupping for hours, eyes bloodshot-red and woke him up with a killer headache. He felt the tears stain the material of his pants but he had not the heart to stop them from falling, so he held himself tighter and cried harder.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo woke up to a silent apartment and a pounding headache, or maybe it was the headache which impaired his sense of hearing. Either way, there was no sign of Mingyu in the living room or kitchen, while he washed up, got dressed and ate some cereal. Which was strange, because Mingyu was usually very loud, for a shockingly paralysing moment he thought that maybe the younger had already “moved out.” Just like that.

No goodbyes, just slipped quietly through the front door as he slept. If that was the case, then Wonwoo would immediately have to cancel him -thankfully, the front door beeped and unlocked at that moment. He let out a breath that he didn’t even realise he was holding when the younger’s towering figure appeared before him.

Wonwoo was so out of it, a mixture of relief as well as a great dose of forced disinterest washing over him. He wasn’t even _interested_ to find out where Mingyu was coming from, _already_ dressed, _this_ early in the morning.

The younger gave him a tight un-Mingyu-like smile as he put his phone in his back pocket, just _staring_ at him. Wonwoo felt self-conscious, _very_ aware how red and puffy his eyes were, since he'd been crying all night. But he didn’t understand why Mingyu looked so- _pained_ , not that he was _trying to_  in the first place. Something intense quickly flashed in the younger’s eyes, he looked away and sighed. His shoulders were slumped and he looked almost disappointed, but Wonwoo kept telling himself that he didn’t care.

 

 

‘Let’s go.’ Mingyu’s voice was small and he looked really tired, like he hadn't slept all night but he was avoiding Wonwoo’s gaze so he couldn’t figure him out. They set off for work, neither boy speaking a word, until Mingyu killed the engine as he parked near the Pledis building.

The latter looked deep in thought the whole drive and the older couldn’t bring himself to speak, lest his voice broke, as yesterday’s kiss played over and over in his head. He shut his eyes tightly, attempting to rid himself of the feel of those soft pink lips, the plush, bouncy flesh feeling heavenly against his own.

Mingyu’s quiet moan, as he held his face tenderly, the gentle pressure of lips on lips, so sweet as it over-rid all other feelings in his body, skin tingling sensationally, while lips moved in synchronisation.

 

His eyes flew wide open in shock when he realised that the last part did _not_ happen yesterday. Reality dawned on him and he broke away, but Mingyu’s hand on his nape stopped him from getting any further, they were nose-to-nose and Mingyu smirked.

‘I thought kissing was no big deal...’ he murmured, rubbing their noses together. Wonwoo flinched, cheeks flushed as he tried to push him away, only to be held tighter, ‘Why’re you freaking out?’ the sentence was slurred against his lips after another short peck and he attempted to look away but Mingyu’s hand was stopping him from moving his head, so he settled for lowering his gaze.

‘I-I’m not.’ He _was_. But he had to prove his point, heart racing, he closed the gap between their lips, a gentle press, barely anything but his lips tingled and it was _definitely_ something to him.

He ran for his life after that, trying to look like he wasn’t flustered and dying inside, as he left a pleasantly surprised Mingyu in the car.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It seemed that his office was the only Mingyu-less space in his daily life at the moment. He’d always wanted to be closer to the younger, and no matter what happened between them, that never changed once.

_Now_ though, with this strange turn of events, he wasn’t too sure anymore. Did Mingyu’s sudden change have anything to do with him coming home at 7am? where could he have been?

And that dizzying kiss in the car, was proof enough that something wasn’t right. He _thought_ they agreed to be friends, he _thought_ Mingyu was moving out and he _thought_ he could control and suppress his romantic feelings for the younger. But all his _thoughts_ were irrelevant now, knocked to the side and made redundant, all because of a simple kiss.

It dawned on him how wrong he’d been when he convinced himself that a “ _kiss meant nothing_ ” because now, he was going crazy over the meaning of one. His phone vibrated with an incoming message, it was lunchtime and he hated how fast time went by when he needed it to slow the fuck down.

 

**-Come eat.**

**1:33pm**

 

He stared at the single text from Mingyu for an embarrassingly long time, it was _just_ lunch.

That’s _exactly_ what he thought yesterday and look where that led him.

Outside Mingyu’s office door, he debated whether he should knock or just walk in. He leaned closer to the cool surface, hearing muffled voices of conversation and laughter. His blood boiled, how dare he laugh so happily, when Wonwoo felt like he had the weight of the world on his heart and smiling was the last thing on his mind.

Mingyu didn’t seem to notice him walk in and if he did then he did a great job at hiding it, since he didn’t react in any way, continuing his phone call as if he was still the only one in the room.

 

 

 

 

 

He was picking at his food, not really having much of an appetite. He tended to not eat much when he was emotionally stressed, the husky voice and melodic laughter that once brought him joy, were now piercing at his bleeding heart.

At first, he attempted to follow the younger’s conversation but that proved difficult since he was speaking in English and Wonwoo was far from fluent, so he struggled to comprehend. All he got was that Mingyu was close with whoever that was and the words “let’s talk later”, as he hung up the phone.

 

He nibbled on a piece of seasoned crab meat, moving the rest of the food around in the container aimlessly. Lost in thought, he didn’t realise the younger was speaking to him until he was crouching by his side, Wonwoo startled, his spoon clattering to the black marble flooring as it slipped out of his hand.

Mingyu picked it up, placing it gently on the table, the office was silent, ‘You’ve barely eaten anything.’ accurately observed. He looked away from Mingyu’s intense gaze, mumbling his answer. ‘Not hungry.’

‘You’re _not_ hungry?’ he repeated, making sure he’d heard correctly and Wonwoo nodded.

‘You didn’t have dinner last night, either.’ Mingyu continued after a short pause, a hint of concern sneaking into his voice.

‘I had breakfast this morning.’ He pointed out, pouting.

Mingyu huffed, ‘Barely half a bowl of cereal, does not count as breakfast.’ he sounded angry and Wonwoo fixed him with a deep scowl. What right did he have to be angry with him? _None_ , that’s what. Did he not know _he_ was the cause of all this mess?

‘It’s _none_ of your business whether I eat or what I eat, stay out of it!’ he snapped as he stood up, but Mingyu towered over him pushing him back in the armchair. ‘You’re not going anywhere, Wonwoo. Not unless you finish your food.’ He tried to stand up again, failing instantly when he was restrained by Mingyu’s strong thigh as it crossed over his lap, while the younger sat diagonally on the armrest, his left leg stretched out by his side.

Wonwoo was effectively trapped in the chair, pushing and shoving at him to no avail, all he could do was glare at the smug younger.

Mingyu wasn’t budging since he was much stronger and Wonwoo had no choice but to resign to his fate, he flopped back in the chair and placed his crossed arms on top of Mingyu’s thigh, his glare intensifying. ‘I’m not a baby. Leave me be.’ he spat angrily.

‘Only after you eat.’ Mingyu replied quickly, smiling at him weirdly, it made him feel funny and he wasn't sure what to make of it.

‘I-I don’t want to.’ He stuttered, he couldn’t help it, Mingyu was making him flustered and all of that over a simple _smile_? He wanted to kill himself.

 

Mingyu shrugged, smile intact, ‘I’m not in any particular rush... I can wait.’ And when he looked at him, his gaze was _so_ intense, that he was transfixed for a moment. Like he was trying to convey something _else_ through the piercing brown orbs, like this was more than just getting Wonwoo to eat. But he tore his gaze away, they _were_ just friends. Right?

‘Fine. Wait then.’ Huffing, Wonwoo glared at the marble.

Mingyu was infuriating, so he imagined the sharp angles of his jawline as well as the soft curves of his perfect face on the floor, and glared at that instead.

Then the glare slowly began slipping away, he felt his shoulders deflate, face relax and his eyelids were halfway to shutting.

By the time he realised why any of that was happening, it was already too late, because his body had reacted. Mingyu’s dangerous hand was in his hair, playing with the strands and messaging the scalp, it felt great and it was exactly what he needed right now. But, this was definitely _not_ the time to let his guard down. He was confused and didn’t need this adding to his already overwhelming sense of helplessness.

‘Stop that, Mingyu.’ He complained, irritated. Swatting at the intrusive hand.

‘You like it though.’

‘I fucking don’t.’ His glare was venomous but Mingyu wasn’t looking his way, busy playing with his hair again.

‘You told me that night at the river.’

_Fuck_ the river, and _fuck_ the asshole that Mingyu said he liked at the river. Wonwoo _hated_ the river now, and didn't bother to conceal it, ‘Can you fucking stop with that.’

‘With what?’ His tone was amused and not serious at all, this angered Wonwoo further,

‘We don’t even talk anymore and whenever we do, all you can seem to think about is _that fucking_ night at the park.’

Mingyu opened his mouth but Wonwoo clapped his hand over the soft pink lips before he heard what the younger had to say. Then he huffed, trying to speak calmer as he carried on, ‘ _Stop_. I get that you trusted me with your crush. And I appreciate that you do, considering we met recently... but I’m fucking _sick and tired_ of hearing you go _on and on_ about that asshole.’

Mingyu’s eyes widened and Wonwoo’s heart thundered behind his rib cage, the younger gently removed the pale hand on his mouth and held onto it softly, fixing him with a tender gaze and Wonwoo didn’t know what to do himself or where to hide.

‘Wonwoo, I-’

'NO!..' He cut him off again, as he shook his head frantically. He was _so_ scared that he decided the best thing to do was talk, and he let all his stupid thoughts borrow his voice, ‘You know what, if you like _him_ so much why don’t you just move in with him?’ Mingyu seemed shocked for all of two milliseconds and then he was biting back a smile, Wonwoo couldn’t believe his eyes.

Was Mingyu that stupid that he couldn’t see how mad and jealous he was?

_Normally_ , Wonwoo himself would be the first to deny being jealous, claiming that he had no business wanting what others had, when he was perfectly happy with his lot. But even _he_ could sense the jealously that leaked from his eyes and drenched his tone, Mingyu didn’t seem to notice any of that and if he did then he was doing god’s work at concealing it.

 

His shy smile a mixture of amusement, smugness and a tiny hint of something sad. But the overriding emotion in his eyes, which he'd struggled to previously identify was fondness, soft and sweet. Like sugar and honey dripping off his loving gaze, it gave him somewhat of an unsettling feeling. He knew it was stupid to feel like this, like _that_ was meant for him but it was obvious that the mere mention of that asshole made Mingyu feel so _much_.

Wonwoo was almost green with envy and the colour would've shown on his pale skin, if it weren't already painted red with all the blushing. He briefly wondered if he also looked like this when he spoke of Mingyu. Like he was ready to jump off a cliff for his sake or determined to pluck stars from the sky just to make him happy, for some unknown reason the thought upset him greatly and he swallowed back a thick lump of emotion.

He'd cried enough this week and hoped he'd no longer have to shed tears over Mingyu, the boy was in love and Wonwoo knew all too well, how hopeless that feeling was. He'd make things easier for himself and find other things to focus on. His abused heart _still_ cried out and refused the idea, but he silenced it and told himself he was fine. Wonwoo survived 24 years with _out_ him and he could continue to do so with _out_ him.

 

He _could._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"But I don't want to _just_ survive, I want to _live_."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's technically not even Friday when Im posting this, it's 1:57am & I've got work in 5 hours. YAAAY.  
> First of all, I'm sorry if you've been waiting up for this (blame my siblings), but it's here now.
> 
> I'm sure it's kinda obvious that this is nearly ending & that's sad but I want to make it good for you guys & I want it to be something I can be proud of. What I'm tryna say is, the next update might take a bit longer than usual, just because I want it to be THAT much better. I hope you understand.
> 
> Thank you all so much for supporting me by reading the fic and leaving nice comments, I really really appreciate that & yeah... find me on twitter @Taeskimono if you wanna yell at me :D


	40. Chapter 40

 

‘He’s already got a roommate, though. A really cool guy, I think you’d get along well with him.’ The younger’s eyes sparkled, tone chirpy as he talked about him, that lucky asshole.

 

‘Why the fuck are you telling me? I don’t give two flying shits about him, or you for that matter. Go fuck yourself.’ He was done hearing Mingyu’s love-drenched tone drawling on and on about him as his beautiful brown orbs filled to the brim with unrestrained fondness at the mention of the asshole.

Mingyu _really_ liked the guy, that much was obvious, but why wasn’t he doing anything about it? 

 

Wonwoo blanched at Mingyu's next words, ‘I’d rather fuck him, but he’s too dumb to realise how much I want him.’ Mingyu blinked after that, face straight as if he didn't just say what he _definitely_ said.

Wonwoo was horrified, torn between covering his ears or his face as the colour rushed to them, ‘STOOOP. You fucking nasty piece of work, I don’t wanna know.’ 

Mingyu pursed his lips, studying him intently, ‘I wonder if he’ll ever realise how much I like him, if I don’t say anything.’ he voiced wistfully.

He hit the younger’s thigh with a tightly clenched fist, he didn’t need this in his life, ‘Let me go, I said I don’t care.’

 

‘No.’

 

‘Mingyu, leave me alone.’ He shrieked, when the younger grabbed both of his wrists, rendering them useless. He fought back regardless, keeping his eyes focused on the ground rather than Mingyu’s infuriating face.

 

‘I wanna kiss him again?’

 

It was safe to say, he lost his shit at that point, Mingyu wasn’t his. What right did he have to get angry? But his shit was lost and he couldn’t find it, so the sentiment was lost on him, he _freaked_ out,

 

‘You kissed him?! Already?! Sober?!’

Mingyu nodded after every question and Wonwoo tried to force his wrists free so he could punch the heartbreaker in the face. ‘You fucking bitch. Why are you even asking me?! Go fucking kiss him if that’s what you wanna do.’

 

‘If I could, I’d do it.’

 

‘Then let go of me, I don’t care what the fuck you do after that. Choke on his dick for all I care.’

 

‘If I could, I’d do it.’

 

‘I _DON’T_ CARE.’ Wonwoo screamed, trying and failing to cover his ears because Mingyu was still restraining his wrists.

 

‘I love him, hyung.’

 

His heart shattered in his chest, any last hope he thought he had after their kiss, dissipating. He felt tears prick his eyes and he willed them to not fall, he swallowed the emotion down, ‘Then go tell _him_ that, move in with _him_ and live happily ever after. Just leave _me_ out of it.’

 

‘If he’d let me, I’d do anything for him.’ Mingyu’s tone sounded lost, eyes dazed and full of emotion as they searched his, Wonwoo felt like he was missing something again, he huffed, tired of all the yelling,

‘You’re pissing me off...’ understatement of the century, and Mingyu had no plans of letting him go anytime soon.

He might as well fraternise with the enemy, it’d probably be the last time they’d be this close anyway. ‘Why’re you saying “if I could” why _can’t_ you? Does he live abroad, or something?’

 

‘I kissed him in my car this morning...’ Mingyu blurted, blinking afterwards.

 

Wonwoo gagged and it was only 20% fake because _eww_ that was disgusting, then he realised with a start, Mingyu kissed him this morning too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What a fucking player, he wondered who got kissed first, then he remembered how Mingyu had come home super early.

His eyes widened in realisation, so _that’s_ where he was. Why was Mingyu playing him then? Granted. He’s the one that kissed him first and proceeded to act like kissing was no big deal. But if Mingyu liked the other guy he really shouldn’t be kissing them both.

Then all other concerns flew out the window and he blanched at the prospect of having indirectly kissed an asshole. Before he could say something potentially stupid, Mingyu spoke up,

‘He’s just a dumbass that doesn’t see how much I love him. Can you imagine he told me we’d never get married?’

 

It felt like he was being hurled from a brick wall to the concrete floor with hurricane force, why was this happening to him? ‘Wow, you even talked about _marriage_?’

 

Mingyu nodded, ‘He said we were _too_ different, that we disagree too much so it wouldn’t work out.’ Mingyu was frowning and that was adorable, but it was also sad. Wonwoo sighed, watching on as he allowed the younger to play with his fingers in his lap. Maybe they were going through the same thing right now, maybe they had _more_ in common than he'd originally thought, so he asked him the _same_ questions that he often asked him _self_. 

‘Then why do you still like him? If he's not interested in you for the long term, doesn’t that mean he doesn’t really like you much? Shouldn’t you be getting over him? instead of subjecting _me_ , an uninterested human to your unrequited love.’ He only added the last sentence to lighten the mood, since he was getting a little too serious, even Mingyu was gaping at him with wide eyes. Wonwoo shrugged, looking away with an embarrassed blush, maybe Mingyu's situation wasn't as _deep_ as his own, after all.

 

The younger squeezed his palm and the touch was so gentle and reassuring he didn't want him to stop, ‘Ugh, I give up. I wanna tell him so bad...’ Wonwoo pulled his hand back, shocked, ‘You mean you’re gonna _confess_?!’ he interrogated, sounding a bit too invested for someone trying to feign nonchalance, 

 

Mingyu smirked at him, lacing their fingers, ‘Are you... jealous?’ His heart dropped, beating faster, why was Mingyu looking at him like that?

 

Wonwoo swallowed, ‘Do I have reason to be?’ Mingyu shook his head firmly, biting back a smile and Wonwoo rearranged his face back to it's stoic blankness, ‘Exactly... now fucking move, I have work to do.’ He tried to stand up but the younger pushed him back down, shaking his head with a firm, ‘Nope.’

 

First came his shock at the audacity, then he remembered how Mingyu seemed to manhandle him a lot. Second came the embarrassment at how easily he fell when Mingyu hardly used any force and how rarely he complained about the younger's habit of reigning freely over Wonwoo's body. Lastly, came the forced anger, with which he attempted to conceal the former two emotions, he wasn't sure whether it was working, ‘ _Why not_!? I helped you figure shit out with your asshole crush, now let. me. go.’ He hit him with every last word, but that seemed to be doing more harm to himself than Mingyu, the younger boy smiled finally moving off the arm chair and effectively freeing him from what felt like hours of captivity. One stern look from the younger and he discarded any thoughts about getting up to leave, he didn't want to be barricaded to it again, so he watched as Mingyu picked up the fallen spoon and wiggled it in his face, ‘You won't leave until you eat. I’m gonna go wash this and you _better_ be here when I get back.’

 

Wonwoo bolted out of the arm chair as soon as Mingyu left and stormed towards the door, who the fuck did he think he was? Ordering him around, force feeding him and shoving his asshole of a crush down his heartbroken throat. Was he expected to remain silent and take all the abuse? _Just_ because he liked the guy. Absolutely freaking not. And that was his conclusion, but then why was his outstretched hand hovering over the doorknob, instead of grabbing it? Why were his hands getting damp with sweat and his heart frantic with nerves? He realised with mind-numbing demise that he wasn’t ready to let go, not yet.

 

A vibrating noise startled him out of his head, it sounded a lot like a phone. His was charging in his own office so it was probably Mingyu’s, he wanted to look back at it despite not even caring much. At least that's what he tried to convince himself of, then a second vibration alerted him that it was coming from Mingyu’s desk, he looked back involuntarily.

Another vibration and the screen of Mingyu’s phone lit up, he knew not what possessed him to read the oncoming stream of messages that appeared on the lockscreen. Or why the sender and Mingyu were sharing any form of contact, or how long they’d been talking. Most importantly he was trying to figure out _who_ the texts were referring to, since no names were mentioned. Suddenly he wasn’t too sure where he stood anymore or whether he wanted to stand anywhere at all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**FROM: Kwon SoonLOUD**

  **-Did you do it?**

**14:11pm**

 

**-KIM MINGYU**

**-For fucks sake, didn’t you tell him yet?**

**14:29pm**

 

**-He’s not replying either...**

**-Istg if you two don’t do something**

**-THEN I WILL**

**14:57pm**

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Very gently, he placed the phone down _exactly_ how he'd found it and retraced his steps back to that darn armchair. Then he proceeded to stare blankly at the wall where a framed painting of a headless man seemed to be laughing at him. In his head, one thought stood out above everything else, " _Mingyu and Soonyoung?_ " he focused on it and tried to make sense of what he'd read. To his knowledge, there was only _one_ thing the pair had in common, and that was Wonwoo. But if his suspicions were accurate in that the texts were indeed referring to him, then what the hell was Mingyu supposed to tell him? More importantly why would Soonyoung _not_ tell him himself and Why would _they_ know something that _he_ didn't?

 

Perhaps most important of all, was the fact that he could easily confirm whether it was about him, since his friend mentioned that " _he_ " wasn't replying either. Simply checking if Soonyoung had messaged him about something similar, would put a full stop on all his doubts, but Wonwoo was glued to the seat, a sense of foreboding and dread creeping into his soul at the mere thought of confirming his suspicions. It simply could _not_ be, he hypnotised himself.   

At some point during his internal monologue, Mingyu had come back and the next thing he felt was something cool and smooth on his lips. He blinked, almost cross-eyed as he stared at the spoon on his lips, then his eyes followed the tanned hand holding it, travelling up a dark blue sweater to finally settle on the face of a grinning Mingyu.

 

 

 

Wonwoo sighed, ‘Mingy-’

'Hyung...' the younger cut off his complaint, sitting on the armrest with a container of food, ‘...we’ve been over this already. Stop whining and say “ahhh”...’

He closed his eyes and forced himself to comply. Reinforcing the dam behind which a strong current of flowing emotions threatened to break it down. Thrashing violently as he fought to keep the distressing thoughts at bay. 

So with eyes clenched tight, he opened his mouth wide, took the spoon into his mouth when Mingyu put it by his lips again, chewed, then swallowed. Repeating the steps every so often, until there were no more spoons waiting by his lips. He finally opened his eyes, blinking to deter the moisture that collected there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘Hyung?...’ the younger started uncertainly, once he was finished putting all the containers away and wiping the table.

Wonwoo wasn’t in the mood for talking, especially after reading those messages. Could it _really_ be about him? If so, what was Mingyu supposed to tell him that _even_ Soonyoung knew about?

 

It seemed like he wasn’t in the mood for moving either, seeing as Mingyu was no longer restraining him, yet he remained in his place.

In _fact,_ he wasn’t in the mood for _living_ at all, when he remembered that he’d helped his crush decide to confess to _his_ crush. It made no sense so there was no other explanation, Wonwoo was _dumb_.

 

Mingyu must’ve taken the silence as a sign to continue, because he sat directly in front of him on the coffee table, Wonwoo hoped that wouldn’t break. Mingyu was leaning into him, reducing the space between their faces as their knees touched, he looked up when the younger cleared his throat, ‘About my... uhm my crush, I’m gonna tell him tomorrow... Is tomorrow alright?’

Wonwoo leaned back, away from the younger and looked directly into his eyes,

‘He’d be an idiot to _not_ want you back, it’s obvious how much you like him, Gyu... Good luck.’

Then he stood back, numbing the pain as he moved to get back to his office, but a firm palm on his thin wrist held him back. He couldn’t even begin to conceal the sadness on his face as he looked down at the younger.

Mingyu sighed, standing up and Wonwoo quickly turned his head away when their faces nearly touched at the proximity.

 

‘Is it _that_ obvious?’ He felt Mingyu's hot breath on his cheek and closed his eyes, nodding his head in reply.

Mingyu's eyes would become so soft, his smile would stretch on for miles and his aura would generally become so bright, voice filled with happiness and tone drenched in fondness. In other words Mingyu's crush was _very_ obvious. ‘Then why don’t you see it?’

 

Wonwoo furrowed his eyebrows, utterly confused, ‘I don’t think I follow...’ the younger laughed, nuzzling the side of his neck and wrapping his arms around his waist, then sighing deeply before he said,

‘Yeah, Okay... Tomorrow. You’ll follow tomorrow.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo _wanted_ to ask what that meant, _wanted_ to ask what all the skinship meant, _wanted_ to ask why his best friend was talking to his crush. Instead, he laid in bed that night, asking himself those questions _over_ and _over_ again. He couldn’t stop them from running a rampage in his brain even though he knew he had no answers.

 

Earlier that day when he'd finally escaped from Mingyu and back to his oen office. The first thing he’d done was grab his phone and check for any new messages from Soonyoung. He nearly dropped the phone when he realised the answer was yes, the time stamp indicating they were sent mere minutes apart from the ones directed to Mingyu.

 

**-Jeon Wonwoo, I'm stressed...**

**-Are you guys back on good terms yet?**

**14:32pm**

 

**-Did he tell you anything important?**

**-ANSWER ME!! you dilapidated stick figure**

**14:45pm**

 

So it _was_ about him, but what would they both know regarding Wonwoo, that _he_ didn’t. The last message sent roughly four hours ago, gave him an indication as to what it was, but he too busy being confused and stressed to realise in that moment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**-Are you and Mingyu TOGETHER yet???**

**20:18PM**

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When he finally sat up in bed, playing with the snow globe and staring at the happy boy within the glass, he felt much calmer, brain less foggy and thoughts clearer. Once he internally rewound the recent events, beginning with Jihoon's cryptic words at the studio to the latest messages from Soonyoung, he realised there really wasn't _much_ to think about. Especially because of the way Soonyoung worded that question, it was done in such a way that there was a _very_ limited possibility for misinterpretation.

In other words, his best friend was asking whether _they_ were dating.

 

Soonyoung may have been a loyal supporter of them as a _couple_ since the very beginning, but considering the context of this message, he didn't think it was meant to be a joke this time. It seemed more _genuine_ rather than his usual playful fantasies, so he deduced that Mingyu was meant to tell him something that would lead to them being " _together_ ".

A wave of something powerful hit him and he took a deep breath as he rode it out, letting it transport him deeper into his mind, snippets of the past flicked through randomly. Scenes and scenarios involving Mingyu, the way he smiled as he gave him nice things, the way he pulled him closer to his body, touch gentle and eyes soft. Hugging him and nuzzling his neck, holding him and kissing his cheek, lacing their fingers together and staring with that fond look in his eyes, when he thought he wasn't looking.

Then his heart picked up the pace, coming alive and forcefully banging against his chest, the night at the park when he'd told him about having a crush on a friend flooded his brain. The "friend", or rather the "asshole" that got drunk one night, that Mingyu carried home, that Mingyu said he liked. The same asshole that _kissed_ Mingyu and proceeded to forget all about it, the asshole that Mingyu claims he'd kissed _just_ this morning, the one Mingyu had described as " _cold_ " and distant.

Wonwoo was in a state of shock, like his entire life had been fake and suddenly, he wasn't sure what his _own_ name was anymore. Either Mingyu loved repeating everything he did with _him_ on his crush, or Wonwoo was more of an "asshole" than he realised.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clenching his sweater-paws in resolve, he glared determinedly at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. Tonight, he’d ask him tonight. Consequences be damned, he could deal with those later, right now, his thoughts were too loud, sleep was most certainly _not_ coming, so he was doing this tonight.

 

Wonwoo was done with all this confusion and the strange dynamic between them would only get stranger and less manageable the more he stalled. _This_ isn’t what he wanted, he needed to at least try to get what he wants. _So tonight_.

Tonight, would be _that_ night, either the _best_ or _worst_ night of his life. That was the kind of unimaginable power Mingyu came to have over his life.

 

Taking a deep breath, he filled his lungs with oxygen. It’s now or never, light headed and even lighter on his feet, Wonwoo padded his way to his bedroom door. The cool surface of the doorknob against his clammy palms gave him an unsettling feeling.

Halfway through the hall, he paused, blinking furiously to allow his eyes the time to adjust to the darkness. When he could finally make out the rectangular wooden door of Mingyu’s room, his heart went into something akin to cardiac arrest, violently thrashing against his ribs. Once again, his warm sweaty palm was on the cool surface of a doorknob, Mingyu’s this time. _If_ he opened this door and walked in, there’d be no going back, he’d have to confess what he _thinks_ he knows.

_However_ , if he turned away now, then he knew he’d never have the courage to do it. It really _was_ now or never, the thought hit him again with more force this time, he closed his eyes, beginning to feel the onset of a panic attack.

 

The door swung open soundlessly, more darkness greeted his almost blind eyes, he stepped in, closing the door behind him. The click of the door shutting resonated in the silence and the darkness intensified, he heard some shuffling and a groggy, sleep-laden yet familiar voice asked, ‘Wonwoo?...’

 

The mentioned boy swallowed thickly, unable to move a single muscle in any direction. He simultaneously wanted to run into Mingyu’s arms and confess his thoughts and feelings, yet he also wanted to turn tail and run back to his room, losing his only chance at having something more than friendship with him. His eyes stung, he _knew_ why, but he tried really hard to hold them back.

 

‘Come here...’ it was that voice again, that husky, slightly lisp-y, deep yet chirpy voice. He _loved_ that voice, he knew life would lose its meaning without it, without _him_.

His feet moved on their own accord, attracted to the magnetic field which was dragging him closer and closer, until his kneecaps hit the side of the younger’s bed. A strong palm gripped his hoodie, fingers winding themselves around his forearm, pulling him in the bed.

Wonwoo was no longer in control of _any_ thing, a helpless bystander as he felt his own body fall on the soft mattress, an even softer duvet coming on top to engulf him in fluffy warmth, _warmth_ which his burning body didn’t _actually_ require.

Then he lost the will to live as Mingyu pulled his body closer, arms coming around his small frame so that Mingyu’s head lay in the crook of his neck. Meanwhile Wonwoo was lying flat on his back, eyes frantically tracing non-existent patterns on the ceiling. He felt the warm breaths of air on his neck, the pleasant weight of the younger’s arm on his torso and his comforting existence which lay so close next to him. Yet he failed to feel any of that comfort, knowing the storm within him would soon break the tense silence.

 

Wonwoo’s mind was a blank canvas, thoughtless and wordless. He felt a hand stroking the side of his arm and he breathed, a deep inhale as the newly oxygenated blood rushed to his brain and his other deprived organs. He shivered and coiled his body deeper into Mingyu’s. How long had he been holding his breath? -Now that his brain wasn’t oxygen deprived he could think more clearly, or as clear as it got when he was _this_ close to Kim Mingyu. His heart shuddered, beating loudly than ever, both boys were now laying on their sides, facing each other, breath mingling and noses almost touching at their proximity.

 

‘Mingyu...’ the word slipped past his lips as he stared into the other’s eyes. Despite the darkness, he could make out the strong emotions oozing out of those chocolate-brown orbs, melting his heart and satisfying his sweet tooth. How had he _not_ seen it before? Was he really that blinded by his own thoughts and feelings that he failed to see the warmth and affection dripping from those eyes, for _him_.

He summoned just about enough courage to grab the younger’s hand, cool smooth skin, meeting his warm clammy one. He stared at their entwined hands, gaze filtering over to connect with Mingyu’s intent one. He closed his eyes, breath shuddering out of his mouth in irregular puffs, the next time he opened them, words were already tumbling out of his mouth.

_Words_ that could never be taken back or altered, _words_ so clear and concise, that they allowed no room for error or misunderstanding. _Words_ that made Mingyu’s expressive eyes widen in shock, then fill with confused yet amused awe, only to be replaced by a darker, shiver-inducing gaze. _Words_ that went,

 

 

‘Why didn’t you tell me your asshole crush was _me_?’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There was no real bite to his words, no accusatory tone, or angry undertones, just a hint resignation and belated realisation. His chin quivered and he was certain his eyes were filled to the brim with unshed tears as he looked at the other, he could _feel_ them. 

Mingyu leaned in slowly, and he felt soft lips on his exposed forehead, then his temple, along the side of face and on his cheek. Between his eyes as they fluttered shut without permission and on the tip of his nose as it scrunched up at the tickling sensation.

‘I’m sorry.’ A shiver ran down his spine at the simple words, rushing back up and down again as it shocked his senses and left him buzzing with electricity.

Wonwoo peeled his eyes open, searching the younger’s for _any_ thing, _some_ thing. His heart thundered in his chest, the storm was unleashed and the ball was now in Mingyu’s court. Was Wonwoo right to make that assumption or had he misconnected the dots and rushed here with false evidence? If it was the latter then he highly doubted he’d want to carry on living.

 

Then the younger sighed, moving to lie on his back, eyes on the ceiling and no longer on his face.

‘I didn’t know _how_ to tell you, hyung... You never made it easy for me, saying we’re just friends and I couldn’t figure out if... if you wanted _more_ with me.’

‘What happened?’ They both knew what he was referring to, the past few days of avoiding eye-contact, flaming emotions and ignoring the other’s existence. Then _some_ thing changed, Soonyoung’s messages, coupled with Mingyu’s cryptic words and his unstoppable drawl as he fawned over his “crush”. It all served to confuse the life out of him, yet suddenly it _all_ made sense somehow.

‘Soonyoung told me you had a crush on me... Then I told him I felt the same way about you but I couldn’t confess. It happened last night.’ Mingyu’s hands played with Wonwoo’s pale fingers on the younger’s hard torso, he had a feeling it wasn’t a conscious decision but he focused on the voice, ignoring the hand situation, for now.

‘We weren’t talking then.’ Wonwoo added thoughtfully, remembering how they’d reached a point where they couldn’t even face each other anymore. He chuckled in disbelief and Mingyu shot him a toothy smile, he couldn't believe that was _just_ last night.

 

‘You locked your door and refused to even look at me, I couldn’t- I doubted Soonyoung’s words. I didn’t think you liked me like that.’ The emotion in the younger’s tone was enough to fill up a whole ocean and he struggled to believe that _he_ was the one making this happen. He shuffled closer, head propped by an elbow as he hovered over the younger, the hands playing with his own froze and a tentative gaze began searching his own. He allowed them to, exposing his _all_ to the younger and wanting him to see everything that he’d kept locked away for so long, his voice was barely a whisper when he spoke next, choked up with emotion,

‘How about _now_? Do you still think I don’t like you like _that_?’

 

‘I think you do.’ Mingyu’s tone mirrored his own, his heart stuttered and stumbled and his entire being shook with anxiety. Mingyu knew now, he knew his feelings for him. The feelings that he’d been trying his best to conceal and quench for so long were now out, heart splayed out on his sleeve for the younger to do with it as he pleased.

He was strangely anxious, yet beyond relieved. But did Mingyu _still_ like him like that? Or had he given up along the way? Wonwoo needed to confirm that this wasn’t a one-way thing or he’d crash and burn, ‘Do _you_?’

 

The reply was an instant ‘I do.’

 

In his emotionally tense state, his brain tended to stop and start working in random intervals, leaving him without a filter or the ability to rationalise certain actions. So in the heat of the moment he swooped down and covered the younger’s lips with his own.

Their _third_ time, yet it felt like the very _first_ time.

_Once_ too drunk to remember, _then_ too high strung to enjoy and the last too unexpected and dazed to recall. In a sense, this really _was_ their very first kiss, the first time without the veil of friendship in between. The first time without the barrier of intoxication and the first, without confusion and anger diluting the feeling.

They were _both_ sober and conscious of their actions, aware that this was going beyond their carefully constructed boundary of friendship. Yet the pure thrill that coursed through their veins as the younger opened up for him, and the prickling of electricity as their tongues and lips clashed and caressed and fought for dominance, was all the confirmation they needed to confidently tear through their inhibitions and find the other's awaiting embrace on the other side.

A deep moan tore through his throat and trickled into Mingyu’s open mouth, the younger’s swallowing the sound as his tongue licked at the roof of his mouth.

Wonwoo's eyes shot open to find the younger’s scandalised expression gaping from under him, Mingyu peeked at him through his lashes, tentatively as if he was deep in thought.

Then Wonwoo blinked and everything was different.

 

Mingyu had flipped their positions with remarkable ease, immediately reconnecting their lips. He gasped in mild shock and the younger used it to his advantage, wet hot muscle sliding against his own as he deepened the kiss. It felt incredible, indescribably so, hands down the best kiss he’d ever had and he never wanted it to end. But he was human and humans needed oxygen as much as he needed Mingyu to never stop kissing him.

But then his lungs burnt and he began to feel lightheaded, so he stopped. The boy on top of him rested their foreheads against each other as they both panted heavily into the other’s mouth.

 

As Wonwoo blinked his eyes open and adjusted to the darkness, he could make out the sheen of Mingyu’s bronzed skin as the side of his face was bathed in pale moonlight, the younger boy still had his eyes closed. And with their current position of forehead-to-forehead, they were closer than ever. In the spur of the moment he planted a chaste kiss on the younger’s cheek. Mingyu’s long lashes fluttered as he opened his eyes and a smile brighter than the starriest of nights took over his features, canines gleaming in the dim moonlit room.

 

Mingyu rolled off of him, laying on his side to face him instead, and Wonwoo mirrored his actions on the opposite side so that their faces were barely an inch apart. And then they just simply stared at the other and smiled, not moving much and barely blinking as the dark night got darker around them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! Sorry it took so bloody long, confession ONLY happening after 40 parts & almost 130k words. GADDAMITT, I realise I might've put you guys through hell & I hope it paid off because LOOK, A CONFESSION?!? Errmagaaard.
> 
> To Wonutrash:  
> I'm excited if you can't tell, it's your b-day today & you jokingly mentioned a meanie confession would make you happy so HAPPY BDAY BISH. You're all grown up now :'( & I can't even believe it's been that long since we 1st started talking. I hope school wasn't too bad today & I hope the picture came out okay & I hope you stop injuring your pinky & stop getting sick & I want you to know that you're an amazing person & I wanna keep talking to you forever & ever & ever... Wuv u <3
> 
>  
> 
> With that being said, I WON'T be ending this fic as soon as I said I would. I've had a change of heart & I'll be doing it for a while longer. Although, I'll be updating less than before cuz I'm starting some new meanie fics as well... yep, that's all.
> 
> Y'all can come yell at me on twitter @Taeskimono & I hope you enjoyed reading this & special thanks to TinTina, Syd & JoshGreg & of course, bday gurl BERNIIIIIIII <3


	41. Chapter 41

 

 

 

 

 

Wonwoo rolled over in bed, he was at that point in his sleep cycle where he was painfully aware that his time in the blissful darkness was over but stubbornly holding on to it, regardless. His sigh turned into a contented yawn as he lay on his back, allowing his feet to dangle off the bed while he stretched his arms over his head and under the pillows, he didn’t remember having this many, in fact he didn’t remember his bed being this wide either and why was the sun hitting him from this angle, head-on instead of from the side.

Wonwoo’s face scrunched in confusion, his eyes popped open and he sat up abruptly, blinking. The first thing he noticed when his vision finally stopped swimming was that he wasn’t on his bed nor was he in his room and from there, last night’s happenings flashed in his brain. He blushed and the deeper he got into the details, the more colour rushed to his face, slowly, he reached back and grabbed a fluffy pillow, teal coloured leaves printed on the soft pillow case.

Then he proceeded to stuff his hot face in it and scream. Letting it all out and he wasn’t even sure how much of it was muffled by the pillow and how much of it would be heard beyond the closed door, but he held nothing back, they’d hugged, cuddled and kissed and the best part was that they both confessed to liking the other.

His head snapped up from the pillow and between catching his breath and pulling his own hair, he halted all thoughts and actions.

Mingyu _liked_ him.

He jumped out of bed, throwing the pillow in the air and not caring as it landed on the floor with a dull thud, then he continued jumping around the room like an excited schoolgirl. Wonwoo wanted to strangle someone and scream some more and hug Mingyu, “ _You can do more than that now_.” His brain supplied him with that thought and he actually squealed, because he realised he _could_.

So he wasted no time at all and ripped the door open, that’s when he stopped. As he stood there staring at the empty living space beyond the hallway, he realised he could smell it, his _own_ breath and it _stank_. Quickly turning on his heel, he walked to the end of the hall and locked himself in the bathroom, the only coherent thought running around his head was that he wanted to be done ASAP and get to doing _things_ with Mingyu.

 

 

 

 

 

He blinked at his reflection in the mirror, toothbrush poking through his lips and mouth foamy as he listened carefully. The sound by muffled but he heard the front door closing, then footsteps approaching deeper into the apartment, he shuffled closer to the door putting his ear against it, toothbrush abandoned as it dangled freely from his mouth. The footsteps paused  _once_ somewhere down the hallway and began sounding again, closer to the bathroom at the end of the hallway, then they stopped again and he tried to hear more but all he got was silence.

Wonwoo was about to move back and spit the foam out but a tentative knock startled him, some of the foam slipped down his throat and he coughed and cringed, rushing to the sink to spit the rest of it out. The knocking came again, ‘Hyung?... Everything okay in there?’ it was Mingyu’s concerned tone followed by the rattling of the doorknob, Wonwoo continued coughing until he wasn’t choking anymore, then he gagged to get the toothpaste foam back out, but it wasn’t happening, the dirty foam was well on its way to his stomach and he grimaced in disgust.

Another knock came, a bit more urgent than the first but calmer than the second, he dried the water droplets from his face and undid the lock.

 

 

 

 

Not even a second later, it was swinging open and almost hitting him in the face, he jumped back, eyes wide and hand on heart, ‘ARE YOU TRYNA KILL ME?’ as his mouth opened to allow the accusatory tone to escape, his eyes frantically darted to the accused.

Mingyu sighed, visibly looking more relieved than he did a second ago, he walked in and grabbed his arm, wordlessly pulling him into a hug.

‘I thought you were dying.’ Mingyu whined after a while of just hugging in silence, Wonwoo frowned, ‘why the hell would you think that?’

‘You were coughing like you’d lose a lung. What happened?’ The younger sounded like he was genuinely worried about him, but he couldn’t tell him he was choking on foam because the knocking startled him, that would make him sound like an idiot so he said this instead, ‘I _did_ nearly die, because of _you_ forcing the door open like that… YOU NEARLY HIT ME IN THE FACE, DUMBASS’

Mingyu physically flinched and when he pulled away, a hand was covering his ear and his face looked pained.

 

Wonwoo crossed his arms, fighting back a smile, he would’ve apologised but it _was_ true, the door had barely missed his nose and he was honestly too shaken to control his volume.

The younger pouted, a glint of mischief flashing in his eyes, ‘After _everything_ that happened between us, _I’m_ the dumbass.’ His tone was serious and the way his left hand gestured between them slowly, seemed strangely Insinuating. Wonwoo felt his cheeks burn up at his own stupidity, he was embarrassed for not connecting the dots sooner but he’d be _stupider_ to admit that. It was easier to hide behind the pretence of being emotionally inept, now that he _knew_ Mingyu liked him, expressing himself became even more of a daunting task. So the only thing he could do when Mingyu’s gaze on him intensified was squeeze past him and hide somewhere.

 

 

 

 

That somewhere happened to be the kitchen and he pretended to busy looking in the fridge, when all he was trying to do was use the cool air to calm his flaming face.

Chuckles followed him all the way into the kitchen and soon after, strong arms wrapped around his middle from the back, soft lips landing just below his ear and kissing him there. Wonwoo clenched his fists, his heart racing as he let the door of the fridge swing shut,

‘So cute.’ Mingyu’s warm breath tickled his neck and his shoulders quivered, the taller boy chuckled some more at his reaction and held him closer, lacing all their fingers and back hugging him like that. Why did Wonwoo wake up feeling like he _wanted_ this, especially when he _clearly_ couldn’t handle it? He whined in frustration and tried to pull away with a pout, but Mingyu just nuzzled his neck, ‘What am I supposed to do with you when you’re being so darn adorable, hmm?’ Wonwoo gulped at the younger’s words, feeling smooth fingers along his jawline, gently guiding his face backwards as a pair of lips landed on his heated cheek.

He was hyper aware of just how hot it was compared to Mingyu’s cool lips, his eyes fluttered shut. Wonwoo shivered when those same lips pressed gently against his own, a small pressure at first and he feared it’d end there, but he wanted more so he craned his neck further, slotting their lips together more firmly. This was more like it.

Just as he hummed in content at finally kissing properly, Mingyu pulled away.

 

 

 

Wonwoo blinked and wanted to whine at him but he was immediately silenced as the younger cupped his face in his warm palms, swooping back in to kiss him deeply, swallowing the complaint on his tongue. He stumbled back, opening his mouth wider and revelling in the sinful sounds that fell through Mingyu’s lips, the younger pushed him back onto the cool surface of the closed fridge, tongue slipping into his mouth as he felt the warm pressure of a firm chest on his own.

The hands on his face travelled slowly down his neck, over his broad shoulders and slid down his arms while he continued kissing him sweetly. He was too distracted, thoughts heady as a cloud of something thick and potent hovered over his brain, he needed to breathe.

They pulled apart, both panting heavily as they stared into the other’s eyes, Mingyu moved their interlocked hands higher and pinned them either side of his face and the look in his eyes was so intense that Wonwoo found himself shying away from the direct eye contact, ‘stop… don't look at me like that.’ his voice was small and shaky, completely foreign-sounding to his ears, he bit his own lip which was probably just as swollen and deep pink as Mingyu’s, he wanted to bite them too.

But before he could convince himself either way, the taller boy stepped impossibly closer, burying his face in Wonwoo’s neck and breathing deeply, pulling the shorter in by the waist so that they were hugging again.  

 

 

Without the addictive lips on his own and the captivating eyes watching his every move, he was able to think a bit clearer, the thick cloud in his head dissipating slightly to allow some of the other thoughts the opportunity to shine through. And he focused on them, then he blanched and almost groaned out loud, “ _WORK!_ ”. That’s when the long list of schedules, meetings and pending reviews flashed through his head, he grimaced in pain and Mingyu must’ve sensed it, because he pulled back and the combination of his gorgeous face with the sweet words was even _more_ painful than the daunting work day ahead.

Goosebumps erupted on Wonwoo’s skin at the single word, ‘Baby…’ it’d been so long since he last heard it and he shivered, ‘What’s wrong?’ Mingyu hummed nuzzling closer.

Wonwoo had to close his eyes and order himself to breathe, before he was able to speak again, ‘We’re gonna be _so_ late for work.’ He sighed, head snapping up with a judgemental scowl at Mingyu’s next words, ‘We _could_ just stay home and cuddle…’ he wiggled his eyebrows and the older scoffed, gently pushing him away.

‘I don’t know who you think I am… But I wasn’t picked _employee of the year_ to just _not_ show up. I have responsibilities and… umm we have the entire weekend to cuddle.’ He blushed with the last part and focused on a nasty looking crack in the ceiling, suddenly finding it particularly fascinating despite it being there since he’d first moved in with Soonyoung years ago.

Mingyu audibly gasped and Wonwoo narrowed his eyes in warning, but that didn't seem to deter him at all, ‘Wow, we’re cuddling the _entire_ weekend?’ the younger’s eyes were wide and bright as he acted shocked and Wonwoo rolled his eyes with a small smile, glancing at the taller boy with a contemplating expression.

Mingyu was fully dressed in a burgundy suit, it was well-tailored and perfectly fitted, in the sense that he was basically looking good enough to eat. He allowed his eyes to rake over and appreciate his appearance some more, all the way from the tastefully curled comma hairstyle, the tight black turtle neck layered underneath the open suit jacket, to the tips of his black-socked feet. To say he looked incredible would be the biggest understatement in the history of human existence.

Suddenly Wonwoo didn’t blame himself _at all_ for letting Mingyu do all that _stuff_ to him with his tongue and his hands, he gulped looking away and clearing his throat to finally ask the question that’s been nagging his head for a while now, ‘Where are you coming from all dressed up?’

Mingyu looked down at himself, ‘Ahhh, the gym.’ Wonwoo frowned at the simple answer, his gaze questioning, so Mingyu took the intuitive to elaborate, ‘It’s easier to shower there. And, I don’t leave dirty laundry laying around the apartment this way... I know you don’t like that.’

Wonwoo blinked, not expecting that at all, ‘Oh…’ he voiced dumbly as his head tried to wrap itself around this new information. So Mingyu was coming back from the gym all along, he wasn’t looking this fine to meet random people at ass o’clock in the morning. Wonwoo tried to stop himself but he smiled anyway, that was adorable, _Mingyu_ was adorable.

But still he asked, ‘So where _is_ the dirty laundry?’

The younger blushed, ‘Does that matter?’ he sounded sheepish and Wonwoo’s eyes widened in disbelief, ‘Don’t tell me you left it in your locker?...’ his answer came in the form of more blushing and avoiding eye contact. Mingyu seemed positively guilty, ‘Wooooow, that’s disgusting. Bring it home and wash it or you’re literally dead to me.’

 

Mingyu gaped at the threat, his expression the definition of offended, ‘You’re gonna break up with me over some laundry, _before_ we even get to go on a first date?’

His blank expression faltered as he forced himself to remain stoic, ‘ _Technically_ , we’ve been on plenty dates.’ It didn’t even feel like a lie because Wonwoo _had_ always considered them as such, despite knowing he shouldn’t have.

‘Technically, things are _completely_ different now.’ Mingyu’s gaze fixated on him, an explicitly suggestive undertone to his words.

Flustered, he cleared his throat and said the first dumb thing that came to mind, ‘ _Nothing_ ’s different, you’re still a dirty dumbass.’

‘And _you’re_ the _asshole_ I’ve been crushing on for months, yet you only realised it last night… _Please_ tell me who’s dumb?’ Mingyu tilted his head in question, amusement dancing in his eyes,

Wonwoo poked at the younger’s chest, ‘You.’ He chuckled when the younger pouted, full on laughed when he huffed and crossed his arms, then bent over cackling when he stomped his foot and turned his head away.

Wonwoo was almost wheezing at the sight, although, he had to admit Mingyu _did_ look cute, like a toddler as he sulked adorably, but the boy was a giant with breath-taking visuals, so the whole thing looked a bit ridiculous. He had a feeling the younger wasn’t really _that_ upset, but he stumbled over to him regardless and despite being weakened by the giggles he managed to hug the younger with all his remaining strength.

And if Wonwoo had any energy left in reserve, he would’ve used it to laugh some more at how _hilariously_ fast Mingyu’s arms came around his body to squeeze him back _even_ tighter. He felt the tenderness and the emotion in his embrace and quickly decided _this_ was his favourite place from now on, he wanted to stay in Mingyu’s arms forever.

 

Wonwoo didn’t care that it was perhaps too early to jump to such seemingly rash conclusions, he _knew_ what he was feeling and he was hardly ever wrong about these things. The unsettling thought that Mingyu and him came close to _completely_ messing things up once, flitted across his brain and he held the boy tighter to himself, he’d been stupid and hesitant and nearly lost him as a result.

 

He wasn’t about to repeat that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Burgundy is a funny colour, it sounds like a food...
> 
> You can follow me on twitter @Taeskimono & I'll see you whenever I decide to upload next. After writing so much angst, fluff has become a mission & a half. This was really hard to write, but I'm gonna keep trying to get over the cringe & JUST DO IT. :D
> 
> Also thanks a lot for 9000+ hits & 500+ kudos. I can't believe it's already THAT much. I criiiiiii but I DWC.


	42. Chapter 42

 

 

 

Wonwoo blinked and the weekend was gone, he blinked again and the entirety of the following week was gone, when he blinked again for the third time the calendar on his office computer told him it was already 25 days into the new year. Twenty days since Mingyu and him started this unidentified thing between them and had Wonwoo been serious about new year’s resolutions then he’d be having an existential crisis at the moment.

 

It’s a good thing he couldn’t care less about those things then, because Wonwoo hadn’t cooked a _single_ healthy meal or made the effort to eat anything that was remotely nutritional since the year began. Nor had he gotten off his backside for a time longer than that required for a toilet break or grabbing a chocolate bar, the gym was a foreign mystical land to his activity-virgin self and the thought of exercise in any of its forms made him want to curl up and fall asleep.

He couldn’t even recall walking for longer than five minutes at a time in the past month and that’s when Mingyu couldn’t find a parking spot closer to work. Speaking of the other boy, Wonwoo blamed him for a lot of those things, since everything he ate was made by him and Wonwoo wasn’t bothered to find out what the contents of those meals were. They tasted good and he knew for a fact it was better for him than the store-bought crap he was used to having, that was good enough for him.

As for the lack of exercise, he also blamed the younger for that, or rather his car. Wonwoo was a realist and therefore the idea of walking or taking the bus home was entirely redundant to him, especially when his roommate had a car and especially because that roommate also happened to be his co-worker. It was counterproductive and a complete waste of time to turn down a free ride, of course his body would thank him in the long run but after a tiring day at work, the last thing he wanted to do was put himself through even _more_ hell. He was happy and healthy enough with his exercise-free life, for now at least.

Except a few days ago when he met up with Soonyoung and Jeonghan to get their wedding suits coordinated. Soonyoung had told him about this girl that he worked with and how she’d lost weight through mental exercise or overthinking. Something he was very familiar with and Wonwoo realised that maybe his life wasn’t as exercise free as he’d thought.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jeonghan rolled his eyes _again_ , but Wonwoo had already lost count on how many times his brown-haired friend did that. They were at a high-end tailor’s in the heart of Seoul, where they hand-made personally stylised suits for their clients, because Jeonghan never half-assed anything. A lingering scan of the shop’s flashy, chic interior had Wonwoo’s bank account crying already.

He was currently standing with his back straight in front of a sleek full body mirror, at Jeonghan’s request. Next to him was a fidgeting Soonyoung, unable to stand still since it was against his innate belief system, Wonwoo bit back a smile as he stared at his antsy friend through the mirror. while the oldest of the three got busy matching their ties with their fitted black suits.

Jeonghan fixed a royal blue tie around Soonyoung’s neck, the fifth in the last twenty minutes. ‘Hyuuung... does it matter what shade of blue it is?’ Soonyoung’s high-pitched question earned him a stern glare and Wonwoo snorted, poking his tongue out at his whiny best friend when Jeonghan turned to _him_ with yet another tie, the eighth of the same shade for him. Wonwoo shrugged and allowed the soon to be groom to mess around with the clothing item, keeping any complaints he may have had to a minimum, unlike _some_ one.

It was a Sunday morning and most humans would rather be asleep at this time, but Wonwoo and his two close friends were out shopping.

He _tried_ to rationalise that it’s because all three of them worked during the week and they’d be too tired to meet after work in the evenings, so after some careful negotiations it was decided Sunday morning was their best option.

Truthfully though, their gathering was due more so to Jeonghan’s insistent commands, than anything else. Forcing Soonyoung to cancel a date with Jihoon to be here and Wonwoo to similarly cancel one with his bed, so they weren’t the happiest of people at being involuntary made to cancel their original plans like that, but this was _Yoon Jeonghan_ so they couldn’t stay mad for long.

He was one of their closest friends and it also helped that the boy was only doing this due to the stress and excitement of getting married soon, which was a massive deal in its own right. That was only amplified by Jeonghan’s generally control freakish tendencies, he was one of those people that had the perfect vision in their mind and would stop at nothing nor rest, unless they made it into a reality. After years of friendship they’d just grown to accept that this was simply the kind of person he was.

 

Therefore, Wonwoo understood and even sympathised with his older friend’s groan of frustration as he went through at least thirty pairs of royal blue ties yet claimed he couldn’t find “the one” amongst the large selection.

‘Ughhhhh, fuck my FUCKING life. What kind of fucking royal blue tie looks this dark? I didn’t ask for some fucking NAVY shit, fuck... I just fucking want some ROYAL FUCKING BLUE, gaaaad’

The smartly dressed shop clerk gaped in horror, Soonyoung snickered in amusement at the scene while Wonwoo watched on unfazed, until he realised that the socially correct thing to do was pull Jeonghan out of the classy suit store and distract him for a bit.

And that’s _exactly_ what he tried to do, but it seemed Soonyoung was on a _completely_ different wavelength and thus Wonwoo couldn’t help but scowl.

Because every time he managed to successfully steer the subject away to less stressful topics, the purple-haired, big-mouthed, smiley-faced, energetic boy would bring up the wedding, undoing any progress Wonwoo had gathered prior to that.

 

Their older friend didn’t seem to appreciate it either and Wonwoo could almost feel Jeonghan’s stress level skyrocket further and further, the more Soonyoung raved about cupcake flavours and bouquet arrangements. Until he _snapped_.

 

The friends were sat around a bench in the mall’s food court after buying some brunch since health-conscious Jeonghan decided 10:47am was too early for lunch. One thing the older wasn’t concerned about as he snapped was his volume, voice ringing out over the ruckus of the surrounding crowds of people,

‘SHUT THE FUCK UP, BITCH. WHAT FUCKING WEDDING? At this rate you’d be _fucking_ lucky to get a herd of donkeys to attend a fucking one-man buffet at Wonwoo’s shitty apartment’ Jeonghan sighed and took out his mirror to fix his hair back in place after the violent outburst, meanwhile Soonyoung choked for no apparent reason and Wonwoo hardheartedly slapped his flat palm on the coughing boy’s back, while staring blankly at Jeonghan to show him that he was _fine_ and unaffected by the indirect insult.

But he was _also_ human and groom-to-be or not, he just wanted this over and done with, ‘Why don’t we try a different colour?’ His tone was tired and impatient, Jeonghan gaped at him as if he’d slaughtered his entire herd of donkeys, ‘I knew you uncultured swines wouldn’t get it... sometimes I feel like talking to you about fashion is like repeatedly hitting my head on a brick wall. You’ll never understand and all I’ll end up with _is a fucking headache_.’ Wonwoo scowled, he was offended but talking back would be like digging himself a grave so he went back to picking at his cold fries instead, blocking all other sounds.

 

After a while he picked up the sound of Soonyoung beside him, the boy dramatically sighed, which was nothing new but Wonwoo lifted his head to see what’s happened this time. He was surprised to see his friend already looking straight at him ‘What?’ He voiced after swallowing the bland fry with its cardboard-like texture, he wanted to throw up.

Soonyoung raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, ‘Why aren’t you eating?’

 

_Sunday was pancake day_ , his brain supplied, as if that was the answer to _every_ thing. However, the statement _was_ true. Therefore, it wasn’t at all surprising that everything else tasted vile in comparison to the fluffy warm delicacies, made _especially_ for him. Dusted lightly with castor sugar and scattered artfully with wild berries. Drenched generously in maple and chocolate syrup, as it entered his salivating mouth. Cushioned with the chef’s soft smiles and sandwiched between his even sweeter kisses.

His mood turned absolutely toxic after the vivid memories and he stabbed at the deranged fries, moving a few pieces around the tray while he mumbled, ‘I’m trying...’ both boys looked at him pointedly so he gave up lying, ‘it tastes like fucking cardboard… Mingyu makes me pancakes on Sundays and I can’t believe I’m missing out on heaven because of you _idiots_.’

 

A moment of silence passed, Wonwoo bit his tongue and refused to look up after his slip up. He’d quickly learnt that mentioning Mingyu in front of his friends was basically voluntary suicide and he steeled himself for the relentless teasing that would surely follow.

Someone mock-gasped and he could’ve sworn he heard a sniffle but he hoped that was just his ears playing tricks on him.

‘Awwww, how _fucking_ precious... how are you two doing anyway?’ Jeonghan’s tone was the epitome of patronising, yet strangely sincere in that peculiar way that only Yoon Jeonghan could pull off.

 

He cleared his throat when Jeonghan used his foot to poke his shin under the table, a subtle threat to either speak or get kicked. ‘We’re _good_ ’ he replied vaguely.

Next to him, his best friend squealed and echoed his words, emphasis on the “we”, it was safe to say Soonyoung was their biggest supporter.

The booted foot grazed forebodingly against his shin again and he shivered, eyes darting to his other more dangerous friend.

But above the table, Jeonghan wore a sweet smile, to the point where no one would even suspect the blackmail going on underneath, ‘tell us more.’

To anyone else it would sound like a friendly prompt, to Wonwoo’s trained ears _however_ , it sounded like a sugar-coated death threat and he gulped.

 

‘W-we umm... live, work and eat together?’ His voice rose an octave towards the end, tone questioning and Jeonghan’s glare informed him that he was on his _final_ straw so he sighed in defeat.

Then he took a deep breath and told them about his demons, completely uncensored and defenceless.

All about his latest fears and concerns, that he’d been desperately trying to fight and conceal. The thoughts that threatened to trample and destroy the blissful happiness he’d stumbled upon in his life.

 

 

Thoughts regarding _them_ , or more precisely where they stood in the grand scheme of things, he began by telling them all about how they’d been on multiple “dates” after the confession.

The things they’d done, such as hold hands at the movies and spend more time stealing glances at the other instead of watching the actual movie so that by the time it finished, neither boy would be able to confidently recall the storyline or even the genre.

He retold them about the time they went to a carnival and kissed at the top of the Ferris wheel, with the shinning moon in the background and a cuddly stuffed fox that Mingyu won for him at the darts game warming his lap.

About their lazy days, when they’d aimlessly cuddle in bed for hours with matching socks or watch Disney movies all day while sharing a rainbow ice lolly.

How stupidly cliché Mingyu was, with the things he’d say and do, like wake him up with kisses and hold his hand whenever he was close enough or hug him at every given opportunity and just generally want to be near him all the time.

 

The things he’d say, even more stupidly cliché, but _so_ hopelessly romantic.

Like how he’d call him “baby”, “squishy” or “babe” or other similarly embarrassing pet names. How he’d compliment his appearance so passionately and sincerely even when deep down Wonwoo _knew_ for a fact he hadn’t slept well and the dark circles made him look like crap.

How he’d gently cup his cheeks and dry his tears when he felt overwhelmed and frustrated with the workload or hit a new writer’s block. How the younger would shower him with endless praise and kisses until he had _no choice_ but to believe the sweet nothings.

_Still_ , Wonwoo appreciated the stupidly cliché and hopelessly romantic gestures, he’d always smile and thank him, because Mingyu was the best thing that had _ever_ happened to him.

That much was a fact sealed in impenetrable concrete, and seared into his heavily-guarded heart, it would _never_ change and he could only hope to be able to express it _more_.

How much he likes him back, to show him with his words and actions, the way Mingyu so effortlessly does to him _every_ day.

 

But he was scared, a beast holding him back from taking that leap of faith and gushing over the lovable boy to his heart’s content.

The _labels_.

From their shared moments in the past three weeks since their confession, or even before _that_ when they were stupidly skirting around their feelings for the other, it was pretty _obvious_ they acted quite _obviously_ like boyfriends.

Wonwoo’s problem was _exactly_ that.

They acted so much like boyfriends, so _naturally_ and it felt _so_ right, yet nothing was official.

 

In fact, neither boy has deemed it necessary to even breach the subject so far. And Wonwoo felt like _this_ far was _too_ far, he couldn’t deal with the uncertainty, he wanted _security_. He wanted _exclusiveness_ , he wanted to brag about _his_ boyfriend and be stupidly cliché/hopelessly romantic together; _with his_ boyfriend. This wasn’t enough for him anymore, he _wanted_ more.

 

 

 

 

 

And he told them as much. Soonyoung gasped and proceeded to gulp down his tall glass of orange juice, Wonwoo pulled a judgemental face and focused his attention on a calculating Jeonghan. Ignoring the purple haired boy, since he generally wasn’t good for much anyway, except for maybe ruining his life and having _that mistake_ somehow end up as the reason for his ultimate happiness, but that was beside the point.

‘Do you realise you could literally just ask him?’ His older friend had a valid point but Wonwoo was shackled with irrational fear, he wished his dense brain could wake up one day and accept that some things in life really _were_ that simple.

 

Wonwoo was aware that he was bullshitting but there was literally nothing else that he could think to do, ‘I don’t wanna be like those cliche whiny bitches that cry all the time and ask “ _what are we_?” When there’s clearly nothing going on’

At this point, Soonyoung decided to pipe up and what he said was entirely true, but also nothing new, ‘But it’s _not_ nothing for you and Mingyu. You two are so fucking _gay_ for each other, a _blind_ ogre could see it.’

Wonwoo pursed his lips and scrunched his nose in distaste at the “ogre” part, imagining Shrek’s blind cousin watching from the bedroom window as he made out with Mingyu in bed.

His cheeks coloured and he shook the thought until it fell off his brain, glaring at Soonyoung for putting it there in the first place.

The purple haired boy sighed, holding up three fingers, ‘I’m giving you three days, Wonwoo. If you don’t do anything about it, then _I_ will... How the fuck are the _both_ of you this dense?’

Wonwoo gaped at his best friend’s retreating figure, Soonyoung was mumbling curses and stomping away from the bench until he disappeared in the crowds.

 

A minute or so later, Jeonghan looked up from his phone after reading aloud, ‘Soonyoung said he’s going on that date with Jihoon and he also told you to eat shit, choke and die.’ He fixed him with a happy smile after all _that_ and Wonwoo grimaced, thinking about the “ _three day_ ” threat. Would Soonyoung he do something detrimental or embarrassing?

‘Knowing Soonyoung, he probably _would_. _I say_ don’t give him the opportunity, put on your big boy pants and ask Mingyu to be your boyfriend first...’ Wonwoo blinked in shock, for three main reasons.

One: he’d voiced his question aloud without realising, two: that was probably the best piece of advice he’d ever received and three: how the fuck did Jeonghan manage to say the whole thing without swearing at least once.

 

‘Judging by how fucking dense and emotionally constipated you always are, I wouldn’t be fucking surprised if the poor kid thought you didn’t like him enough, you dumbass bitch.’ Maybe he’d spoken too soon because suddenly he wanted to vomit out those awful fries right in Jeonghan’s blissfully scheming face.

Instead, he stood up, glared at the devil himself then stalked off wordlessly into the crowd, ignoring the familiar laughter in the background, ignoring the apology of the short man that he’d bumped into and mindlessly walking his way around the city.

 

_Feet_ falling without a sense of direction on the chipped pavements, _eyes_ gazing ahead but vision blurry and entirely unfocused on his surroundings, _mind_ wandering even more aimlessly than his body was. At _some_ point the sun had moved into the centre of the sky and he was _still_ walking, that’s when his phone began to incessantly vibrate in the pocket of Mingyu’s leather jacket.

It was the owner and he couldn’t help but smile.

Not only did the jacket smell so strongly of his cologne, deluding him of his presence but looking at the phone always brought back memories of just how _special_ this boy was in his life.

 

‘ _Gyuuu_...’ he whined into the receiver conflicted and emotional, all that think-walking wasn’t helping much so he was grateful for the distraction. There was nothing like the velvety husky voice of Kim Mingyu as he chuckled then whined in a similar style to Wonwoo’s own greeting.

‘ _Babyyy_... when’re you coming back home?’

He smiled then he removed the phone from his ear at the question, finally checking the time to see that it was almost half past one. His eyes widened a bit, wondering how time went by so fast, then he replaced the phone back on his ear and breathed, ‘Why?’

‘I miss you, do I need more reason than that, babe?’

Wonwoo smiled some more at Mingyu’s immediate answer, his right cheek squished against the phone screen, ‘No...’

Then he let his tongue slip, ‘I miss you too’ Mingyu was silent for almost a full minute and if it weren’t for the sound of his breathing in the background, he would’ve thought the younger had hung up on him.

Wonwoo struggled to find something to fill the silence so he settled for, ‘Gyu, say something I’m getting anxious.’

 

‘Sorry baby, we just needed to take a moment’s silence in honour of your first “I miss you”... so this is what it feels like when your child speaks their first word...’ the words elicited a cluster of different emotions and reactions from him.

First, he was surprised and a bit offended, second, he was flustered and a bit confused but the overwhelmingly larger feeling was something warm and fuzzy.

It began to slowly bloom at the top of his stomach and travelled upwards and outwards engulfing his entire chest in the feeling, his insides hummed in content and his smile widened so much that his cheeks began to cramp,

‘Mingyuuu, that _wasn’t_ the first time, stop exaggerating and I’m _not_ your child’

the younger boy laughed lightly,

‘Thank goodness for the last one, I’d be rotting in jail if you were… What kind of father thinks and does those _things_ with his own son...’ Wonwoo had no doubt in his head that Mingyu was wiggling his eyebrows and smirking as he said that, which was a lethal combo in any context so he was grateful for being miles away and spared the beautiful pain of witnessing that.

 

‘What kind of _things_?’ He’d meant to make Mingyu flustered with his question, but it backfired because Mingyu wasn’t an emotionally constipated idiot like himself and simply played along.

‘Come home and I’ll _show_ you, baby.’

He would never admit it, but the way Mingyu slurred that whole sentence in his ear made him feel certain things and he shivered. Despite that fact, his answer was simple and instant, ‘No thanks.’

 

Melodic laughter filled his right ear and he listened on with a smile. The warm, fuzzy feeling spreading further, as he stood outside the subway station. Then he cleared his throat, changing the subject by asking him what he’d been doing, listening to Mingyu’s soothing voice as he focused on the cracks under his feet.

‘I woke up, went for a run, showered, _did_ the laundry, went grocery shopping, talked to my parents, made plans with Minghao and ignored my work. There’s _nothing_ left for me to do, I _need you_.’ Wonwoo’s heart fluttered at the last three words, _still_ he chose to be annoying instead of romantic,

‘So what you’re saying _is_ , you _only_ need me when you’re absolutely _bored_ and _every_ thing else is _more_ important than me. Noted.’ The younger groaned in reply and when he spoke up next, his voice was serious and sincere,

‘Wonwoo… I _know_ you’re kidding, but don’t even joke about that. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since I woke up and that’s a fact... I just realised it’s not even _me_ that left, but I’m _still_ the one saying this.’

He bit his lip, running his fingers through his dark hair, Mingyu was a dramatic, stressful kind of guy and entirely _too_ good for him, ‘ _Whatever_ , I should be home in the next 20 to 30 minutes.’

 

‘ _Or_ you could text me _where_ you are and I’ll come get you.’

‘No.’ The default answer fell through his lips and he didn’t even regret it, Mingyu whined some more, ‘ _Baaabe_ , I’m bored though.’

‘I _know_ , I’ll be home soon and we can play house and throw a fake tea party.’ He placated or _attempted to_ rather, he wasn’t sure whether it worked but at least the younger wasn’t whining anymore.

‘ _Just_ hurry up, _also_ … I’d rather we play with _each_ other.’ Wonwoo gaped for a short second before hanging up, again completely taken aback by Mingyu’s random confessions.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the nice comments, I read ALL of them but I feel ungrateful for replying with the same generic "thanks" to each one & they take a LOT of time to reply to in a more meaningful way. I'll get to it eventually, sorry if I take forever.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading this, leave a kudo maybe & follow me on twitter (@Taeskimono) if you like, I think I'm slightly better at replying on there :))) C YA NEX TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIME <3


	43. Chapter 43

 

 

At home, he was greeted with a needy Mingyu, constant hugs and kisses were the main theme for the rest of his lazy Sunday afternoon.

In the evening, they baked cookies together and Mingyu did most the cooking while Wonwoo worked his magic and made half the chocolate chips disappear.

Mingyu looked accusingly between the half empty bag and him, While Wonwoo began aggressively shaking his head even before the younger said anything. ‘Wasn’t me.’ He mumbled around a mouthful of chocolate.

The younger chuckled leaning over to wipe melted chocolate off the corner of his lips, holding the chocolate covered thumb in his face and cocking an eyebrow, ‘and you're  _sure_ it wasn’t you?’ He squeezed his eyes shut and nodded, then he felt a hand on his chin as Mingyu firmly ordered him to open his mouth.

He _did_ , with ridiculous ease but he also kept his eyes closed so when Mingyu did what he _did_ , it came as a total shock. Wonwoo’s eyes flew open and he stumbled back, but he was steadied by an arm around his waist and a hand behind his head as the younger’s tongue intently tasted his mouth.

After a while he wound his arms around Mingyu’s neck and stopped fighting it, letting the taller kiss him as if it were his last, then the younger pulled back enough to smile and whisper a breathless ‘it _was_ you’ against his lips.

Wonwoo scoffed in a mixture of giddiness and embarrassment, ‘As if you didn’t know that. You just wanted to kiss me.’

The younger smiled some more and rubbed their noses together, ‘I. Always. Wanna. Kiss. You.’ Each pause was conjugated with a firm peck to the lips and Wonwoo giggled into Mingyu’s mouth when he finally started kissing him properly again. He _loved_ this, he loved _him_ so much and he wished he was brave enough to let those words borrow his voice.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That was two days ago.

Today was the 25th of January and tomorrow Soonyoung would ruin his life in one way or another. Either _that_ or he’d have to man up and ask Mingyu to be his boyfriend, the more he entertained the thought the more he felt like he could do it. Then he blinked and all the courage he _thought_ he had would dissipate with the darkness, he grabbed his phone and stalked over to the company lift, taking it all the way to the top floor.

Then he climbed the steps two a time and stumbled onto the rooftop, quickly scanning the area and walking up to the metal railing when he was certain of being alone. He typed out a quick message in reply to Mingyu’s question and dialled his third most frequently called number.

On the fourth ring, a chirpy voice filled his ear and he smiled into the horizon beyond the railing and the city skyline, ‘hey mum, happy birthday.’ The fresh breeze blew against his loose baby pink button up and ruffled his hair, so he pushed the strands back as his mother’s grateful tone replied,

‘Sweetie, you _really_ called just to say that?... Thank you, you just made my day.’ No, there was something else he wanted to say too. He gulped, then he steeled himself, always finding it nerve-wracking to say the next three words ‘I love you.’

‘Awww, thank you darling. Mummy loves you a lot too. It would’ve been great if you could make it here.’ He sighed, letting the disappointment he felt colour his tone, he would’ve loved to make it to his mum’s birthday party too, but life just got in the way.

‘Sorry mum, you know I would if I could, but work, you know. Also I mailed your gift, you should have it by tomorrow the latest.’

His mother giggled, probably at his sincere tone because he hardly got like this over such seemingly trivial things.

 

‘Of course sweetie, I understand. Your call is honestly more than enough for me... don’t waste your break, go eat with your boyfriend.’ He flushed at her direct tone, like she knew that’s exactly what he was _meant_ to be doing right now, Wonwoo was so busy being flustered that he failed to hear the slowly approaching footsteps from behind him, until he’d already replied into the phone.

‘Muuuum, how many times do I have to tell you, Mingyu isn’t my boyfriend.’

He felt familiar arms wrap around his waist from the back and he would’ve looked back to check who it was if he weren’t 100% certain that it was the boy he’d _just_ mentioned. Wonwoo didn’t know how much of his words the younger heard, but he hoped he somehow missed the last part.

 

His mother spoke again, sounding _very_ amused and Wonwoo was glad he could make her happy on her birthday, even if it came at the cost of his own, ‘You forgot to add the “ _yet”_ , son.’

‘Mum pleeease...’ He was back to whining again and he didn’t even care because he would always be a child to his mother, he felt the arms around him squeeze slightly, Mingyu’s soft cheek nuzzling the one side of his face that wasn’t currently occupied by the phone. Wonwoo placed a palm on the younger's arms and just rested it there on his stomach, hearing his mum again once she was done making fun of him.

‘Okay okay, I’ll stop. Tell him _hi_ for me and to look after my baby son.’ Wonwoo felt his face heat up and he turned his face to the side when Mingyu chuckled, letting him know he’d heard that part, so Wonwoo looked away from the younger’s blinding grin and mumbled into the phone, ‘Tell him yourself, mum. Bye.’

Then he waited silently for her to finish laughing, recognising that it would be a tad rude to hang up there. It took a while, but after she finally calmed down, they exchanged a few more pleasant words and ended the tiring call.

 

That’s when he sighed, body sagging with relief, leaning back into Mingyu’s broad chest.

The taller boy dropped a peck on his slightly warm cheek and Wonwoo closed his eyes while biting his lip in contemplation, ‘Uhm, Gyu?...’ The younger boy hummed in answer, prompting him to continue, so he cleared his throat, ‘have you heard from Soonyoung lately?’

‘Soonyoung?... No. Why?’ He sounded confused, Wonwoo shrugged, acting like it wasn’t anything major. While his mind yelled at him to _just do it_ before Soonyoung _did_ something. But he was still scared, so he bit his tongue and when he replied with, ‘Oh never mind. It’s not important.’ Mingyu hummed again and snuggled closer to his back.

 

They stayed like that for a while, the wind ruffled their hair, the clouds travelled overhead, the sun hidden behind them yet still managing to brighten up the sky above them. Down below, lines upon lines of traffic whizzed by, while people rushed along pedestrian crossings, kids played in a park nearby and everyone seemed to be getting on with their lives and doing _some_ thing.

On the rooftop, they remained alone in silence, as the world continued moving without them and all Wonwoo did was _watch_. Until he didn’t want to anymore, he wanted to do _some_ thing too, but he lacked the courage and today was his final chance to say it. Mingyu was _right_ here, hugging him tightly and playing with his cold fingers, he could _easily_ just ask him now and get it over with.

‘M-mingyu...’ his voice cracked and he held back a grimace, ‘Yes, babe.’

It was now or never, he braced himself.

‘What ar- why aren’t w- ughhh... C-can you be m-’ words broken by nervous stutters, sentences left incomplete in anxiety, he was hopeless, not to mention embarrassing. Wonwoo sighed, ‘Just, forget it.’ Then he moved away from Mingyu’s arms towards the door, not once looking back at the younger’s face.

But his tone had a hint of sadness and confusion when he asked, ‘Hyung, what about lunch?’

‘I’ll eat later.’ He threw over his shoulder, before disappearing down the staircase.

 

 

 

 

Later wasn’t a specific time for Wonwoo, it could’ve been anything from the next _hour_ to the next _year_ to _never_. And although he _was_ hungry, he really didn’t want to face _him_ again so soon, not after that embarrassing attempt. He groaned as his face burned with mortification at the memory, the words just _wouldn’t_ come out, no matter how hard he tried.

It seemed like he suffered from selective speech impairment whenever he was faced with the possibility of rejection. Then he recalled a time when he genuinely struggled to express himself verbally. Stumbling and stuttering over his words, _especially_ with an audience.

That time when he _chose_ to remain silent and hold himself back from even _trying_ for fear of failing again. That was in middle school and Wonwoo thought he was over it now, but _apparently_ not yet. He remembered how his English teacher took him aside and gave him some advice, she'd said, “repeat, repeat and re-repeat until your brain and mouth are _so_ used to it, that it comes out naturally.” It helped back then so he kept it stored in his brain, just in case.

Granted, that advice was for remembering lines for Othello, but sometimes everyday-speech was more difficult than Shakespearean jargon.

 

 

So he took the advice again twelve years later, leaned back in his office chair, closed his eyes and began whispering to himself with his head tilted upwards.

‘Kim Mingyu, be my boyfriend. Kim Mingyu be my boyfriend. Kim Mingyu, be my boyfriend. Kim Mingyu be my boyfriend. Kimingyu, be my boyfriend. Kimingyu be my boyfriend. Kimingyu, be my boyfren. Kimingyu, be my boyfren. Kimingoo, be my bowfen. Kimingoo be ma bowfen. Kimingoo, bema bowfen. Kimingoo bema b-’

 

Wonwoo suddenly stopped. Shooting up from his comfortable position to sit at the edge of his seat, when his office door swung open, his fingers going pale with the force of his grip on the chair. Somewhere in his subconscious his brain was still repeating the sentence, he could hear it even after he’d stopped saying it.

 

It was _him_ again. With food this time. But he wasnt ready yet, so he watched as the younger walked over to the coffee table and began laying out their lunch, Mingyu’s voice shook him out of his daze and he frowned in confusion,

‘Were you on the phone, hyung?’

Wonwoo furrowed his eyebrows, moving to take a seat beside the taller on the sofa, ‘No.’

 

Mingyu looked very much lost but also slightly amused as he said, ‘Then you were talking to _yourself_?’

He scowled, beginning to deny the accusation, ‘Why would I be tal-’ then he paused to whisper, ‘Kimingoo bema bowfen...’

 

Oh my god, did Mingyu hear when he’d been chanting that sentence? Is _that_ why he thought he’d been on the phone?

 

‘Hyung, is that a made up language? _Bowfen_? What’s that?’

His head snapped up to Mingyu’s confused face, ‘what?!’ His voice cracked and his heart began to beat exceptionally louder in his chest.

‘What you just said hyung, “bowfen” what is that?’

Wonwoo felt himself pale, and he began to slowly shake his head with wide eyes, ‘No.’ He stated firmly.

He’d rather end his miserable existence than explain himself, because he couldn’t. So he took a different approach and tried to deny it, ‘Mingyu, I didn’t _say_ that. I didn’t say anything. I-’

Mingyu tilted his head at him and he nervously looked away, ‘boyfriend?’ The younger asked tentatively, ‘it was _boyfriend_ not _bowfen_ , right?’

 

_Fuck_ , he cursed under his breath. Was there a point in denying it further? He’d already made a fool of himself, he didn’t want to add to that.

So he took a deep breath and looked the younger straight in the eye, his back straight, jaw tense and fists clenched, you’d think he was preparing to fight. And with all the confidence he could muster, he repeated the over-practised sentence.

‘Kimingoo bema bowfen’ Mingyu scratched the back of his head, looking around the office blankly, then he slowly repeated Wonwoo’s rushed sentence, as if double checking whether he’d heard right and trying to make sense of it, ‘Kimingoo bema... boyfriend?... what does that-’ then he cut himself off, grasping Wonwoo’s arm and gaping in shock, ‘Kimingoo? That’s _me_!... You’re asking me to be your boyfriend?!’

 

Wonwoo looked around for a place to hide, his entire being hit with embarrassment and discomfort, he nodded slowly. And he didn’t know how he expected it to happen or how he thought Mingyu would react, but this was _definitely_ not what he had in mind.

The younger boy was squealing in such a high-pitched tone it could easily rival Soonyoung’s and he was simultaneously choking and crushing him under his weight as he squeezed his body halfway to death. Wonwoo’s life flashed before his eyes, lack of oxygen making him dizzy or it could've been the fact that he’d asked Mingyu to be his boyfriend and the younger was _happy_.

 

He tapped out either way, since he _really_ couldn’t breathe. Frantically screaming and punching the excited giant off his abused body, ‘You nearly killed me, you fucking dumbass.’ His voice sounded a bit overwhelmed, which is how he currently felt as he observed Mingyu’s vibrant face while the younger patted down his hair for him.

‘Sorry... boyfriend.’

Wonwoo blanched, ‘b-boyfriend?’ He asked suddenly breathless despite being no longer choked, Mingyu nodded with a goofy smile. ‘Kimingoo is your _bowfen_ now, and you’re mine.’ Wonwoo found that he didn’t even mind being teased like that, Kim Mingyu was his _boyfriend_ and life was suddenly _peachy_.

The next time Mingyu hugged him, he allowed himself to be choked.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The blustery wind was cold and strong, making the rainy night worse by thrashing the water droplets right in his face, thankfully the glasses acted as a shield for his eyes. He laughed at Mingyu’s squinted eyes, and his expression turned smug under all the wetness. It seemed like the glasses were good for something after all, although in rainy weather they also presented a clear disadvantage.

Much like himself, they appeared to be terrible at multitasking, so in acting like a waterproof protective shield for his eyes, they were also blocking his vision, which meant that they were utterly useless at fulfilling their main purpose of helping him see. He scowled, not realising how all this thinking was slowing him down and Mingyu pulled harder at his arm, ‘Hyung, can you be any slower?’

An apology was literally on the tip of his tongue but then another thought hit his head and he dug his heels into the ground.

Mingyu turned back to him when he stopped, and the older stared in silence for a brief moment, appreciating the younger’s model-like visuals. Water was dripping from Mingyu’s drenched hair, his skin was glowing, rosy lips parted like he was about to say something as he blinked rapidly to dispel the water around his eyes. ‘What’re you doing?’ Wonwoo shrugged in answer, the cool rain water calming down the heat that threatened to travel to his cheeks at the thought of what he planned to do.

Mingyu blinked back, confused and Wonwoo stepped closer to him, and closer, gently moving the wet strands away from the younger’s face as he looked up at him and then…

 

He kissed him.

 

And it was like a scene from a rom-com movie, because it _was_. One that Wonwoo had watched with Soonyoung years ago, when they were both single and miserable. He remembered wistfully staring at the big screen, praying that he’d have something like that in the future. He’d told Soonyoung as much and his big-mouthed best friend relayed the information to Jeonghan who made sure to crush his dreams, “YOU?! Stop dreaming, idiot. NEVER.”. Wonwoo wholeheartedly believed it back then, a socially awkward, sleep deprived, dishevelled college kid like himself, the idea just wasn’t plausible back _then_.

But it was reality _now_ and it was happening, Mingyu’s arms came around his waist at some point and his own palms were on either side of Mingyu’s wet face, their lips moving together in an intoxicating mix of tongue and bitter rain water.

 

 

After a while they pulled away to breathe and giggle at how ridiculous their current situation was. And it was far from ideal, cold and soaked down to their socks from the constant heavy rain, at almost midnight on a Saturday, and to make matters even worse, they’d done it all for hot chocolate.

Normal people wouldn’t leave the dry comfort of their homes for hot chocolate, and even if they _did_ , they’d take an umbrella and rush to shelter as soon as they could. Normal people _definitely_ wouldn’t kiss in the middle of the road on any occasion, let alone during a torrential downpour. Apparently, _they_ weren’t normal at all, because even as they were walking back to their apartment with their interlocked fingers swinging between them, they failed to be serious and continued to giggle at nothing.

Their footsteps slow and unrushed, while they smiled at each other and at that moment, _two_ things were for certain.

One: they were positively abnormal and two: they were running the risk of catching terrible colds. Neither of those things were good but they were blissfully oblivious to that fact at the moment.

Delighted to be together and too foolishly high on each other to notice the ludicrous nature of their actions.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They only noticed it later that night, when Mingyu sneezed for the fourth time in a row.

Wonwoo had been re-reading the book Mingyu had gifted him in his bed, when the younger complained of boredom and _being_ the accommodating boyfriend he was, he’d allowed the younger to cuddle as long as he was silent.

_Surprisingly_ , Mingyu was doing pretty well so far, a lazy hand playing with the older’s hair on his chest, while the other hand traced patterns on Wonwoo’s fluffy brown hoodie. He was being silent just as he’d promised and Wonwoo found it a little easier to concentrate, despite the feel of Mingyu’s heartbeat next to his head and the gentle rise and fall of his chest every time the younger breathed.

That was until he sneezed and Wonwoo had thought nothing of it the first two times it happened, then he lowered his book and giggled at Mingyu the third time, but by the fourth time his face turned serious and Mingyu laughed at him saying he’d be fine.

Wonwoo frowned, ‘We should’ve taken an umbrella…’ he sounded regretful, it was his dumb idea to have hot chocolate in the first place and he’d feel so guilty if Mingyu got sick because of him.

‘It wasn’t raining _that_ bad when we left.’ Mingyu pointed out, probably sensing his unease, Wonwoo groaned ignoring the book completely as he focused all his attention on the younger, ‘But _still_ , that was stupid. What if you get sick?’

Apparently the younger wasn’t taking this seriously at all, he cooed and pinched both of Wonwoo’s cheeks, ‘Awww baby, you worried for me? That’s sho sho kyoot.’ He rolled his eyes and slapped Mingyu’s hands away, glaring at his goofy smile, ‘Of _course_ , it’s natural for me to worry about my dumb boyfriend’s health.’

Mingyu blinked, looking genuinely taken aback for a whole second, before he opened his mouth to speak only to close it again, almost like he’d changed his mind. The younger smiled sweetly instead, eyes twinkling and cheeks rosy as he pulled Wonwoo back into their original position, hand in Wonwoo’s hair while the older’s head rested on the younger's chest. He resumed his book, not paying attention at all and instead thinking about what Mingyu was going to tell him, that he _clearly_ chose to withhold.

 

‘Hyung…’

Wonwoo closed the book and hummed against the younger’s chest, ‘what?’ he mumbled, feeling sleepy. And for good reason too, since the time was fast approaching two in the morning, ‘sleepy?’

‘No.’ he lied, snuggling deeper into Mingyu’s grey sweater and closing his eyes, ignoring the way his glasses dug uncomfortably against the side of his nose.

Mingyu’s voice woke him up a bit, but only because his question was very strange,

‘Did you know that an average kiss burns three calories?’

Wonwoo sat up scowling and turned to face the younger, ‘O-kay, why do you even know that?’

‘Vernon told me.’

‘Why’s it always _him_ that’s telling you strange things?’

Mingyu shrugged, ‘It’s Vernon, that’s just what he does. And usually Seungkwan tells him a lot of weird things. Sooo...’ then he started leaning closer to him and Wonwoo snorted, trying to keep the embarrassment he felt away from his tone, ‘Back off, Gyu. If I wanted to burn calories I’d go to the gym not your lips.’

 

Mingyu pouted, looking slightly upset but that sadness was only momentary, since he smirked soon after and a mischievous glint shot across his dark eyes. Wonwoo’s brows furrowed in confusion and he wanted to ask what the younger was thinking, but he didn’t need to, because he realised it himself soon after.

Mingyu smacked his own lips, making an obnoxious popping sound and the older’s eyes snapped to them, then he watched as the younger licked over the bottom one suggestively, ‘Are you _sure_ you don’t need your boyfriend’s lips?’ He proceeded to bite on the pink flesh and exaggerate sultry expressions.

Wonwoo gulped, turning his whole upper body in the opposite direction, ‘I-I’m sure…’

 

‘Dammit, Jeon Wonwoo. Is it _really_ that hard for you to say you want me too?’

His first response to that accusation was “ _no_ ”, because it simply was _not_ true, so he brought out the receipts, ‘Technically, _I_ was the first one to admit liking you all those months ago. _I_ was also the first one to ask you to be my bo- boyfriend, thanks for not caring.’ He huffed, crossing his arms in mock-offence.

Mingyu chuckled, ‘You mean the time I practically forced you to say you didn’t hate me over the phone? And the second one doesn’t count. You didn’t even ask me right, _I_ had to figure out what a _bowfen_ was, _on my own!_ ’ His tone was every bit condescending as it was teasing, ‘fuck off’ Wonwoo snapped, feeling offended and embarrassed. 

Therefore, he had every reason to ignore Mingyu for a bit, but the younger didn’t seem to agree because he pulled him closer and began whispering in his ear, ‘come on, babe. Try being romantic, I promise it won’t be the end of the world.’

 

Wonwoo did the _one thing_ that he did best, and that was to panic, ‘Mingyu are you _fucking_ crazy or stupid or both?’

‘Hyuuung… Fine, forget it.’ The younger whined again, pulling away from the hug and looking like he might leave.

 

Wonwoo sighed, feeling overwhelmed that this was happening but also thankful for the opportunity, ‘Close your eyes then.’ 

Mingyu _did_.

He took a moment to chuckle at the younger’s eagerness, which was _too_ much in his opinion. The boy was adorable and the next words just slipped out, _un_ intentionally.

 

Wonwoo didn’t even notice it while they kissed, until they pulled apart for air and the words were reciprocated. He gaped in shock, because he’d said it _first_ and he wouldn’t have known that he’d said them at all, if it weren’t for Mingyu’s final word.

 

 

 

 

 

‘Hyung, I love you _too_.’

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. >_< Bye.
> 
> Thank you all for reading & leaving kudos. I keep saying it, but I MEAN it so you better believe it, thanks again & goodbye till the next update. Hope yall stay safe & happy.
> 
> I'm on twitter @Taeskimono, if you care *shrugs*
> 
> <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3 (That's 17 hearts huhehu)


	44. Chapter 44

 

 

Spring was approaching and as much as Wonwoo loved the snow, he couldn’t wait for it to be warmer again. His fingers were tired of constantly being frozen and he could only tolerate being this ghostly pale for so long. Wonwoo was ready for spring to come now.

He needed the warm sun to kiss his skin back into his natural warmer tone, he needed the temperature to rise so the feeling would return to his fingertips. He needed the thin layer of ice and condensation on the barren fields to be replaced with lush greenery and colourful blooming flowers. Wonwoo needed the frigid tautness of his skin to be softened by a thin sheen of sweat, he was ready for a change.

 

However, it wasn’t quite spring yet, because winter wasn’t done running its course despite it already being the beginning of March. That was made obvious by the fact that it had snowed again the previous night. Wonwoo had woken up to find the world covered in a soft fluffy white blanket and gaped in child-like awe at the beauty. Then he stepped outside, and the freezing temperature almost had him dragging his boyfriend back into their warm apartment for hot chocolate and cuddles. But work was _work,_ regardless of weather and they had to go. It wasn’t spring yet _at all_.

 

But Wonwoo was happy either way, spring might be late this year and he decided he was okay with that. Because either way, his hands always tingled with warmth and his heart was kept even warmer by the remnants of a blazing fire, intermittently reignited and gently smouldering in his chest. Its smoke sweet and presence reassuring, filling him with a sense of safety and comfort, shrouding his entire being in constant happiness. _So what if spring was late?_ Wonwoo mused, gently squeezing his boyfriend’s hand with a sappy smile. He had his personal summer with him and it kept him warmer than a billion springs.

 

 

 

As soon as Wonwoo settled in his office, the office phone began to ring, and he sighed before bathing his tone in false joy and putting it to his ear. It was common knowledge that he _hated_ phone calls, but face-to-face confrontations were _even_ worse, in his humble anti-social opinion. With that being said, he had very little choice in the matter, when it was his _boss_ personally calling him for a last-minute meeting.

He bit his tongue and swallowed his annoyance, plastering on an artificial smile in greeting as he walked into Joshua’s office, where three of his co-workers were already stood around the room. Their light conversations died as soon as he joined them because Joshua clapped his palms to gather their attention, the room fell in silence.

And while two pairs of eyes focused on the boss the other two pairs were far too busy focusing on each other.

Wonwoo’s smile grew much brighter and stretched wider than the one he wore when he'd first entered the office, it was also no longer fake nor forced.  _Mingyu_ was here too and he blushed when the younger looked just as pleased to see him here.

They inconspicuously bumped shoulders and Wonwoo lowered his gaze, biting his lip in an effort to control his intense happiness. Joshua could be saying anything right now and it was most likely important too, but somehow when it came to Wonwoo’s heart and mind _nothing_ was more important than his boyfriend and he failed to catch his boss’s words as a result.

Completely lost in his head as his hazy brain navigated through an infinite stream of the loving memories the made and the candid moments shared. In hindsight, he should've been less passive and more actively aware of his surroundings but sadly that thought didn't hit him, until Mingyu put an arm around his shoulders and subtly shook him out of his daydreams. Wonwoo blinked at the expectant eyes looking directly at him, including Joshua’s and then he gulped, _what was happening again_? _Was he supposed to say something_?

His pupils darted nervously around the office, as if he’d find the answer in the walls if he looked hard enough. But no matter how much he squinted at the plain walls and pretended to clear his _already_ clear throat, it didn’t work. Wonwoo _still_ had no clue what the owners of the expectant stares wanted him to say and he cursed himself internally for getting so distracted. But he was whipped for Mingyu and that was a fact carved in solid stone, it wouldn’t change for the world, so this momentary embarrassment meant nothing to him in the grand scheme of things.

 

He wasn’t even surprised when Mingyu spoke up before him, since he'd been subconsciously holding onto the firm belief that nothing would go wrong as long as they were together, ‘The _rest_ of this work week in _Japan_ for a literary conference… sounds more like a holiday than actual work, doesn’t it Wonwoo hyung?’ Wait! _Week_? _Japan_? _conference_? _Holiday_?

Wonwoo’s perplexed brain failed to make any logical connections between the words, but it seemed like Mingyu wanted him to agree to something, judging by his excited tone. And since Wonwoo was pre-programmed to fulfil all of Mingyu’s wants, the answer became clear to him, even when the question was anything _but_.

Therefore, despite his jumbled mind, Wonwoo nodded his head.

 

Their boss smiled and looked almost relieved at seeing Wonwoo’s small nods, ‘Well then gentlemen and Lady, you should get an e-mail with the flight and accommodation details, as well as the conference timetable and panel layouts in the next hour or so. That’ll be all, I hope you have a great time in Japan and represent Pledis with pride. I have faith in you all.’ He looked pointedly at each of them as he closed the impromptu meeting and Wonwoo almost shied away from the intense scrutiny, but he held his ground and nodded firmly instead, Joshua seemed pleased with that and they were dismissed soon after.

 

 

Wonwoo stood outside the office, feeling slightly confused, not yet realising the extent of this horrific situation that he'd willingly put himself in. He scratched his head while he pouted in thought. _I’m going to Japan for a four-day conference_? His gaze fell to his polished dress shoes and he closed his eyes while his heart began to hammer harshly.

_I already agreed to this_? Wonwoo couldn't keep himself calm, his pinkie twitched, and his chest constricted in pure anxiety at the alarming thoughts that his brain supplied.

The conclusive nature and the finality of those words terrified him. Wonwoo was going to a _strange_ land, far away from home, where he’d be expected to socialise with strangers for _four_ whole days. At that moment, his heart either stilled in his chest or began to beat out of control and it was his _ears_ that chose to block the sound, because either way, he couldn't hear it anymore. In fact he could hardly hear anything except the loud void in his clouded barely conscience brain.

And he didn’t know if he was panicked enough yet, but he _really_ wanted to faint.

 

Fortunately, before he could explore his anxiety deeper and allow it to consume him entirely, he felt a change. The corners of his mouth instinctively pulled into a smile and as his mind cleared up and his heartbeat slowed down from its defeating loudness, the reason behind his receding anxiety became very obvious, because he could hear it clearly now.

Mingyu’s lovable laughter had permeated the air around him and unblocked his stress-clogged ears, breathing became easier almost instantly and he took a deep breath while his tense shoulders lost some of their stiffness.

Wonwoo looked up just in time to see Mingyu exit Joshua's office with the other two employees, watched from a safe distance as the three took turns between chatting amicably and listening attentively to each other. Something Wonwoo would struggle doing, without feeling awkward and uncomfortable, that’s why he normally took the straightforward, rigid approach in dealing with people. Because to him, small talk was pointless and difficult, but to Mingyu he thought the reverse was true. It seemed to come effortlessly, seeing how the younger did it so well and Wonwoo observed them with a small smile of his own as his smiley boyfriend firmly shook hands with them, before they disappeared down the hall.

Not even a full second had passed by when Mingyu’s head turned to him, their eyes met and Wonwoo felt the loving warmth radiate from the younger’s brown orbs, encouraging his heart to slowly unwrap itself from its tight coil of anxiety.

 

But a clearer head meant more room for him to fill with more disturbing thoughts and he realised his impending doom all over again. Wonwoo was going to be on a plane to Japan within the next day, he was leaving people, places and _everything_ he knew behind. Granted, it would only be for a few days and he technically shouldn’t be overreacting as much as he was, but he couldn’t help feeding his concerns. And they grew with the attention, "a few days" was still over _half a week_ of waking up in a strange bed, it was over _90_  hours in a strange land, of eating foods and hearing sounds that he was unaccustomed to, of getting dragged into unavoidable and uncomfortable situations. _Would he be getting any sleep? Would he be able to enjoy himself when nothing felt familiar? On a scale of homesick to severely homesick, how homesick would he be?_

This was usually the point when his mind succumbed to the panic and he regressed into depressing thoughts, but with each step Mingyu took in his direction, the opposite happened and he relaxed. It felt as though the younger was erasing his worries one by one, the reduction in the distance between them representing the retreating of his negative feelings. Until they were almost chest to chest in the deserted hallway and Wonwoo forgot what he’d been so worried about in the first place.

Because Mingyu was _coming_ too, Mingyu would be there _with_ him. What else was there for him to long for? What else could he possibly need? He thought hard, but nothing came to mind. Wonwoo couldn’t think of anything he currently had here that Mingyu wouldn’t be able to somehow provide.

 

And with that final thought, he felt more at peace. He stretched his arms over his head and sighed as he looped them around his taller boyfriend’s neck, leaning into his warmth and smiling when Mingyu chuckled and squeezed him back tightly. ‘You okay?’ He felt the question whispered against his neck and he hummed in answer, closing his eyes and enjoying the feel of Mingyu’s gentle fingers as they combed the hair on the back of his head.

‘You weren’t paying attention in Josh hyung’s office…’ It was a quiet observation but as Mingyu pulled away, Wonwoo saw the question in the younger’s eyes as they gleamed with interest.

His tone was soft when he answered honestly, briefly noticing that it came much easier these days, ‘I _wasn’t_ … I didn’t expect to see you there. I got distracted with my thoughts…’ Mingyu’s arms were still tightly wound around Wonwoo’s waist and he felt them pulling his body impossibly closer, at the same time, the younger’s amused face lowered to his own, until there was barely a few inches of space between their noses,

‘Thoughts of…’ Mingyu’s breathy words were his cue to say something sweet and romantic but he laughed instead. Because Mingyu was always giving him hints like this, and the fact that the younger _still_ insisted on him saying things, whilst fully knowing _exactly_ what he was going to hear, was quite endearing. It felt like it only mattered if it came out of Wonwoo’s mouth, like nothing had meaning until he heard it in person, even though he knew it all.

‘Why do you enjoy asking questions with obvious answers?...’ Wonwoo teased as he leaned in closer, ‘You know exactly what I was thinking of…’ he whispered, deliberately brushing their noses together and watching as a pretty blush spread over the golden skin of his boyfriend’s cheeks. ‘I still wanna hear it though. Tell me.’

‘I was thinking how happy I am to have _the_ most perfect person in the _world_ as my boyfriend.’ Mingyu clamped his eyes shut and almost squealed at the unexpectedly elaborate and detailed answer, and Wonwoo was beaming with pride for causing Mingyu to react in such an unrestrained way.

Not that the younger was one to restrain himself normally, but he was usually more of a smooth charmer than a flustered mess, the latter description usually fit Wonwoo a lot better. So, rare moments when the tables turned like this, were always refreshing and precious to him.

But they typically didn’t last very long and thus smooth charmer Mingyu made a swift reappearance, cupping Wonwoo’s cheeks and sloppily smooching the squished skin.

‘Sappy, Wonwoo. That was _incredibly_ sappy. And I love you.’ The younger drawled lovingly as he rested their foreheads together and Wonwoo’s smile was the epitome of blissfulness.

The younger tilted his head slightly, expectantly, like he was waiting for something, probably for Wonwoo to reciprocate his confession like any normal person would. Not _Wonwoo_ , not _today_ , he stared back deeply into Mingyu’s warm irises and felt his own dark pupils sparkle with pure happiness, then he said,

‘Okay.’ and he giggled when Mingyu echoed his reply questioningly, ‘ _Okay_?’ his tone was slightly disbelieving.

Wonwoo knew what the younger wanted to hear but he wouldn’t be saying it _that_ easily. Mingyu would appreciate the common words more, when he's worked hard to hear them and Wonwoo wanted to mess with the pouty boy a bit more, before he inevitably succumbed to his deathly charms. ‘ _Okay?!?_ ’ Mingyu frowned playfully and Wonwoo grinned happily up at him, completely oblivious to the fact that the younger was planning something evil until it was too late to stop him. 

 

He only felt the sneaky fingers by his sides after he wheezed in shocked laughter, and only realised he was being tickled after his entire body grew weak with the force of his uncontrollable mirth. Wonwoo begged for the other to stop, tears pricked the corners of his eyes due to the intense artificially-induced happiness and his arms ceased their weakening assault on Mingyu's back, stopping in mid-air and falling back limply to his sides.

Initially, the earnest words fell on deaf ears and the constant hits fell on an unresponsive body, Mingyu continued to tickle him to the verge of actual tears and all he could do as his body convulsed and shook in a fit of broken laughs was helplessly swat at the hands on his sides.   

It was like a whole lifetime had passed, when his broken pleas for mercy were finally granted, after what felt like decades of torture.

He took a few calming breaths and the contagious laughter simmered to gentle giggles, then he felt the ghost of Mingyu’s fingers by his sides again and immediately cried out, ‘Stop!...’ Mingyu stopped but only for a second, then before the younger could do anything, Wonwoo let him hear what he wanted, ‘I love you too, baby.’

The light flush on Mingyu’s cheeks darkened, as it _should_. Because Wonwoo knew that as much as the younger loved calling _him_ “baby”, he also enjoyed being called by the pet name just as much.

Except his cheeks weren’t the only things that darkened, because his espresso eyes were now flecked with flashes of ebony, developing a strong undertone with darker streaks and speckles of colour, turning almost black with their depth and intensity. Wonwoo watched unblinkingly as the dark pupils shifted down from his eyes, dropping to his lips then shooting back up again.

And when he caught the brief movement, his mouth dried up and his breath hitched, the younger licked his own lips and Wonwoo mirrored the actions subconsciously. But neither made a move to close the gap between their lips, maybe because they were acutely aware of being in a public space, but Wonwoo scoffed at the idea in his mind, because their current positioning was hardly appropriate for a public work space, so he didn’t see the point in holding back.

When their lips eventually met, it was by mutual compromise, a barely tangible tilt of the head here and a gentle pull by the back of a neck there, and then they were kissing.

At _work,_ and also in _plain_ sight of their boss’s office and while Wonwoo _thought_ he didn’t care, he realised he _did_. So, he broke away from the kiss, before either of them had the chance to deepen it, a lazy pop sounding between them as their lips separated. After they caught their breath, Wonwoo swiftly changed the subject, making sure to avoid eye-contact, ‘So... what did Joshua hyung say _exactly_?’ Mingyu made a thoughtful noise as he began talking quietly,

‘He said we’ll be representing our company at an important literary conference in Japan for four days... You, me and the other two that I _hope_ you saw in Josh hyung’s office.’ The younger raised his eyebrows teasingly and Wonwoo scoffed, hitting Mingyu’s arm lightly and rolling his eyes when the latter exaggerated a pained expression.

‘Shut up, I did _not_ hit you hard and I wasn’t _that_ distracted.’ Then he pouted, crossed his arms and looked away with a huff. ‘ _Such_ a cutie.’ Judging by his laughter and the hyperactive tone of voice, Mingyu sounded thoroughly amused by the current situation. And the next thing Wonwooo knew, he was being swept off his feet and engulfed in a terribly tight bear hug. Which was probably the best thing to happen to him all day, along with everything else that was Mingyu-related, of course.

 

Once he was back on his feet and they were done giggling like idiots, Mingyu laughed, ‘You’re gonna be okay, right?’

‘As long as we’re together.’ Wonwoo’s words were sincere and the younger must’ve felt that because he blushed so hard that the older of the two wondered if it had always been this easy to get Mingyu flustered. The taller boy blinked furiously as his face heated up like the inside of a coal burning furnace, cheeks blazing up against Wonwoo’s cool palms. And in that moment, he fully understood why Mingyu often did this to him, pinching the younger’s cheeks and kneading the soft flesh whilst he watched him whine and attempt to pout. It was all _terribly_ cute, and he stifled his own happy laughter against Mingyu’s neck.

 

Despite secretly knowing all along, he reiterated the following thought in his head, _over_ and _over_ , until it was engraved within him.

_"Wherever you are, I wanna be there with you"_

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry. Me got busy with life, work, sickness etc.
> 
> Also MAJOR procrastination... but I'M BAAACK, I'll try to update more often.  
> HIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, hello, I missed writing these notes. Some of you who follow me on twitter (@TaesKimono) basically forced me to get back to this, so thanks to all of you that kept indirectly nagging me. I appreciate that, I wouldn't have stopped procrastinating otherwise... Tina, Berni & everyone else <3
> 
> Next time I write a chapter note, hopefully won't be next month... >_<


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